Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2016 10:07:36 GMT -5
My brother used to come up to my house all the time to work out. He's a fitness nut that spends several hours a day working out with this big-ass (800 pound) tire, heavy chains, rope climbing, stuff like that. Usually after he worked out he would come in and visit and it was nice at first, but it got old because he'd stay for a couple hours at least and he's a bit of a negative person (to put it lightly), so he spent a lot of time complaining about everything. Anyhow, last March he got this wild hair to move to Florida where our other brother is and I happily watched all that crap that took up a lot of space in my barn get loaded up on a trailer. Yes, he took his 800 pound tire with him. LOL Well, over the past year he's been texting me periodically about how sucky the job situation is in FL and how he can't find anything that pays decent. Last week he said he was going to try for the railroad or offshore drilling. Now yesterday he sends me a text asking if I have an extra room. I told him "sort of". My house flooded in 2012 (actually several times, but that was the latest one) and I still haven't replaced the carpet in the bedrooms and ex took the furniture, so they're just cement floors with tack strips along the edge for the carpet. I have been meaning to get the carpet re-laid, and I told him maybe him coming back would be the fire under me to get it done. Then he tells me he contacted his old job and they're happy to have him back. He won't be able to make August rent, so it would probably be pretty soon. Um...August is 9 days away!!! I don't think I could get anyone in in that amount of time even if I started calling today. Then today he asked for my address, apparently he has a Pod that they could put there. AWESOME. A freaking Pod. I've been slowly trying to get all the crap in my barn, most of which is crap left by the ex's and was thinking of getting a dumpster and doing it all at once. It that tire comes back I'm going to lose it! Done venting.
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Jul 22, 2016 10:11:32 GMT -5
Make sure you have the local rental listings ready to go for him. Or send him some Craigslist links.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2016 10:15:05 GMT -5
Make sure you have the local rental listings ready to go for him. Or send him some Craigslist links. That's not the main problem. He lived in this area most of his life, so he should be able to find a place, the problem is he is BROKE. Like down to his last dime. No money for first/last months rent...really hardly enough for gas to drive up for FL. What he needs is a place to stay until he saves up the money. I bought his washer and dryer for cheap when he left too. Hope he doesn't want those back.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2016 10:15:49 GMT -5
He's one of those that has had money issues his entire life and I can't figure out why. It probably all goes to GNC.
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Jul 22, 2016 10:16:54 GMT -5
Make sure you have the local rental listings ready to go for him. Or send him some Craigslist links. That's not the main problem. He lived in this area most of his life, so he should be able to find a place, the problem is he is BROKE. Like down to his last dime. No money for first/last months rent...really hardly enough for gas to drive up for FL. What he needs is a place to stay until he saves up the money. I bought his washer and dryer for cheap when he left too. Hope he doesn't want those back. I kind of gathered that since he can't make August rent, but my way was funnier. Will he actually be able to save up the money and get out or are you going to be stuck with him forever?
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jul 22, 2016 10:17:34 GMT -5
Can he work off his rent for you for a while? Seriously, for the carpeting, I'd just get something that's good enough for now and have him help lay it. Perhaps he can help you clean the barn, do outside chores, that sort of thing? I'd be concerned about food bills...I'm sure a cup of coffee and greek yogurt won't be enough to fill him up for breakfast.. Good thing you have all those chickens!
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Jul 22, 2016 10:20:45 GMT -5
I'd get him a big area rug and tell him that's as good as it gets with such short notice.
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midjd
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Post by midjd on Jul 22, 2016 10:23:42 GMT -5
I'd get him a big area rug and tell him that's as good as it gets with such short notice. Shit, I'd tell him if he doesn't like the bare floor he can sleep in the barn with the chickens (and his tire). But I am a mean sister
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Jul 22, 2016 10:24:31 GMT -5
I'd get him a big area rug and tell him that's as good as it gets with such short notice. Shit, I'd tell him if he doesn't like the bare floor he can sleep in the barn with the chickens (and his tire). But I am a mean sister I was trying to be nice damnit!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2016 10:28:40 GMT -5
I have all the carpet that was in the bedrooms. It was only a few months old at the time of the flood and we dried them out right away, so it's still like new. All I need is new pad and someone who knows what they're doing to put it down.
He said he'd help out to pull his weight and I would assume he'd buy his own food, because seriously, the guy does eat massive amounts. Luckily I have a half a steer coming soon as payment from our neighbors for planting corn in my field. We will have way more beef than the kids and I can possibly eat alone in less than a year.
I don't think he'll just park and stay forever, he's so particular about things that I can't see him cohabiting with anyone long term, but who knows...
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2016 10:30:05 GMT -5
This was last April. I was celebrating him going and took a picture.
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sesfw
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Post by sesfw on Jul 22, 2016 10:41:25 GMT -5
I'd get him a big area rug and tell him that's as good as it gets with such short notice. Good luck
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tallguy
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Post by tallguy on Jul 22, 2016 10:50:58 GMT -5
This was last April. I was celebrating him going and took a picture. I sure hope he didn't get a flat. I can't even imagine getting THAT spare on, much less being able to drive with it!
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Ombud
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Post by Ombud on Jul 22, 2016 11:44:58 GMT -5
He's family, tag you're it & stuck
Not that I'm any good at this but we all gotta stick in our 2c: 1. He has to apply for UI and seriously look 2. Leave floor as is. At least it's a roof + 4 walls 3. Good news! With a cement floor his 800 lb toy can live in his room with all his other stuff (yes it'll be stuffed to the gills)
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milee
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Post by milee on Jul 22, 2016 11:48:49 GMT -5
3. Good news! With a cement floor his 800 lb toy can live in his room with all his other stuff (yes it'll be stuffed to the gills) Totally agree that he can deal with the bare cement floor given the short notice. As for his 800 lb tire... good luck getting that through any normal sized door.
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Ombud
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Post by Ombud on Jul 22, 2016 11:51:52 GMT -5
3. Good news! With a cement floor his 800 lb toy can live in his room with all his other stuff (yes it'll be stuffed to the gills) Totally agree that he can deal with the bare cement floor given the short notice. As for his 800 lb tire... good luck getting that through any normal sized door. Yeah .... obviously I have no idea on size
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Lizard Queen
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Post by Lizard Queen on Jul 22, 2016 12:05:10 GMT -5
WTF do you do with one 800 lb. tire??
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2016 12:19:13 GMT -5
WTF do you do with one 800 lb. tire?? You flip it. Over and over and over. He also has a set of chains with links that are about 8 inches long. Each chain weighs over 250 pounds. He drags them up and down the property or goes up in the hay loft and lifts them up into the loft. Over and over and over.
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justme
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Post by justme on Jul 22, 2016 12:23:25 GMT -5
Am I the only one picturing this big body builder type climbing out of that beetle and trying desperately not to laugh too loud at my desk?
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skubikky
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Post by skubikky on Jul 22, 2016 12:27:10 GMT -5
WARNING: What is to follow is standard skubikky hard ass response....proceed with caution.
Before you allow him to come and live with you, ask yourself if you really want him living with you?
I'm not sure if you realize this, but it is YOUR home and you have the right to say: "No, your living here isn't going to work out" "No thanks, I'm good....don't really want a roommate" Think of what life will be like with all the negative BS all the time. ALL THE TIME. Once he's there, he'll be there indefinitely. And, you'll probably be supplementing him with food, energy, time. etc.
It sounds a bit like you're enabling another adult who should be figuring things out for themselves. Your priorities, I imagine, would be your two boys and yourself. Are you really in the market for another boy to look after?
Do you believe that somehow you're obligated?
Here, his situation has quickly become your "problem", i.e. carpet in the cement floor bedroom.
You really need to see that this isn't a wise choice for you and your sons. It has all the makings of an impending shit storm. You'll be back here in a few weeks bemoaning the BS he has brought back with him. Maybe as you've allowed him storage favors he feels that the next step, meaning moving in, isn't a big deal.
You really need to think this through and be an advocate for yourself.....
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2016 12:30:28 GMT -5
Am I the only one picturing this big body builder type climbing out of that beetle and trying desperately not to laugh too loud at my desk? LOL He's also got that beetle filled with big speakers and is always blasting thrash metal. He's not really that big. He doesn't have an ounce of fat on him and is well muscled, but not this freakishly muscled body builder magazine type.
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skubikky
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Post by skubikky on Jul 22, 2016 12:30:52 GMT -5
Make sure you have the local rental listings ready to go for him. Or send him some Craigslist links. That's not the main problem. He lived in this area most of his life, so he should be able to find a place, the problem is he is BROKE. Like down to his last dime. No money for first/last months rent...really hardly enough for gas to drive up for FL. But this is HIS PROBLEM. His, not yours. His....do you truly understand this? You're allowing yourself to be sucked into this. He's playing you pretty good here....a true manipulator. If he's broke he should have stayed in FL and gotten unbroke. Not spent whatever money he had driving back to MN. ETA: Zib....where are you on this?
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Lizard Queen
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Post by Lizard Queen on Jul 22, 2016 12:31:59 GMT -5
WTF do you do with one 800 lb. tire?? You flip it. Over and over and over. He also has a set of chains with links that are about 8 inches long. Each chain weighs over 250 pounds. He drags them up and down the property or goes up in the hay loft and lifts them up into the loft. Over and over and over. That just seems sorta nuts and kinda dangerous.
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skubikky
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Post by skubikky on Jul 22, 2016 12:34:07 GMT -5
He's one of those that has had money issues his entire life and I can't figure out why. It probably all goes to GNC. It's easy, he has no common sense. Maybe he should sell his big speakers? None, at least fiscally. And, self-centered enough to attempt to mooch off of his sister, who is a single parent of two boys........really? You really need to take a more aerial view of this. Yes, we all know I'm being "harsh"....well, I don't think so, but there it is. If you allow him to move in and things become difficult, it really is entirely on you. You already know he's a train wreck, yet your willing to allow him into your home? You have two kids!
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on Jul 22, 2016 12:36:25 GMT -5
WTF do you do with one 800 lb. tire?? Do Crossfit, and then talk about how much Crossfitting you did that day.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2016 12:37:44 GMT -5
WARNING: What is to follow is standard skubikky hard ass response....proceed with caution. Before you allow him to come and live with you, ask yourself if you really want him living with you? I'm not sure if you realize this, but it is YOUR home and you have the right to say: "No, your living here isn't going to work out" "No thanks, I'm good....don't really want a roommate" Think of what life will be like with all the negative BS all the time. ALL THE TIME. Once he's there, he'll be there indefinitely. And, you'll probably be supplementing him with food, energy, time. etc. It sounds a bit like you're enabling another adult who should be figuring things out for themselves. Your priorities, I imagine, would be your two boys and yourself. Are you really in the market for another boy to look after? Do you believe that somehow you're obligated? Here, his situation has quickly become your "problem", i.e. carpet in the cement floor bedroom. You really need to see that this isn't a wise choice for you and your sons. It has all the makings of an impending shit storm. You'll be back here in a few weeks bemoaning the BS he has brought back with him. Maybe as you've allowed him storage favors he feels that the next step, meaning moving in, isn't a big deal. You really need to think this through and be an advocate for yourself..... Oh, trust me. I DON'T want him living here indefinitely. He's just very tiring to me. When he would leave I'd just be worn out from listening to him. We're talking everything from politics to people opening the microwave with a couple seconds left on the timer. He'll complain about it. I don't think he'll stay longer than he has to though. I open the microwave with a few seconds left on it all the time. It will drive him nuts. He already has a job lined up (or so he says) and he always works second shift, so he won't be around in the evenings when we're home. His STUFF though. That I'm worried about. I really do want to get my shed cleaned out for the first time since...well...forever. I built it in 94 and have had two hoarder husbands leave crap in there. I want to just get a dumpster and be done.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 22, 2016 12:43:16 GMT -5
That's not the main problem. He lived in this area most of his life, so he should be able to find a place, the problem is he is BROKE. Like down to his last dime. No money for first/last months rent...really hardly enough for gas to drive up for FL. But this is HIS PROBLEM. His, not yours. His....do you truly understand this? You're allowing yourself to be sucked into this. He's playing you pretty good here....a true manipulator. If he's broke he should have stayed in FL and gotten unbroke. Not spent whatever money he had driving back to MN. ETA: Zib....where are you on this? He's been trying to make it in FL. He just can't find anything that pays half what he was making in MN with a lower cost of living. The dumb part was moving down there in the first place, he took a risk there, but coming back is a good idea. I know it's his problem, but I guess I'm kind of in the "that's what family is for" camp. I'm 47 and he's 41. This is the first time he's ever asked me for any kind of hand...well...except for when he was keeping his exercise stuff at my place.
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justme
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Post by justme on Jul 22, 2016 12:45:02 GMT -5
Am I the only one picturing this big body builder type climbing out of that beetle and trying desperately not to laugh too loud at my desk? LOL He's also got that beetle filled with big speakers and is always blasting thrash metal. He's not really that big. He doesn't have an ounce of fat on him and is well muscled, but not this freakishly muscled body builder magazine type. Oh but the speakers and the metal adds to the picture in my head! I'm just going to ignore the rest so I can stay amused until 5pm
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skubikky
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Post by skubikky on Jul 22, 2016 12:46:11 GMT -5
Oy vey darlin......that's it, road trip....I'm on my way.
Let's go over this again. If you, who are the owner and CEO of your home, don't want to store ANYTHING of your brothers.....then you know what you can do? ......Tell him that. It's not complicated:
"I don't want your stuff in my barn" "Sorry, not running a storage facility here, I'm in the process of cleaning that shed out so....NO CAN DO"
And guess what you do then. Any crap that you don't want in there....out it goes. It doesn't matter which husband/brother/whatever.....out it goes.
I swear MInn.....I'm gonna come out there. I'm gonna do it...
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Jul 22, 2016 12:46:33 GMT -5
Do it. Get the dumpster. Fill th as t sucker. And make sur ed your brother sees it and tell him that your done keeping everyone's crap.
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