Party for my dad's 70th birthday

[raeoflyte]

Ideas?  Suggestions?  Help me!  

I completely lost track of time and have less than a month.  He has a twin sister so we'll do a joint party.  It's not all on me, but I'm the ring leader.  Neither my dad or Aunt has a big social circle.  It will essentially be family with maybe a few friends.  25 or less, probably less.  There is a really fancy restaurant we could take them out to, but I'd have to get a sitter for my young kids (which is doable) and it just doesn't feel very authentic.  I'm leaning towards throwing a party at my house, cater in food, card games, etc.  That seems a little too casual maybe?  If I ask my dad he'll say he doesn't care.  I don't really have any other ideas.  

[yogiii]

If you want to get fancy, put a tent up with rented chairs so people can sit out of the sun and you don't have to worry about people bringing their own chairs etc.  Catered food sounds great.

[Wisconsin Beth]

Does your dad like fancy meals out? Big family gatherings at someone's house? People popping in and out all day long to leave gifts and bday wishes?

For my dad, big events like milestone bday or wedding anniversaries need to have as many of the kids and grandkids present as possible. Plan for what he'd enjoy most, with what his sister would want as a close second.

[zibazinski]

How about a picnic and everyone bring something? Hire a professional photographer and get a family portrait.

[zibazinski]

I second hiring tables and chairs. SAMs club or Costco have the silverware with a napkin in it already set.

[GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl]

Would he be more open to celebrating with everyone attending an activity with him?  Not everyone enjoys being the static center of attention.

I'm not sure where you live and what's available but:

Baseball game (can get birthday wishes posted on the Jumbotron), chartered fishing trip, chartered lunch cruise, concert, play, huge family laser tag or paintball game, (you get the drift)?

[GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl]

If you do it at home and have it catered, you could do something fun like bring in a clam bake or BBQ place or one of those portable brick pizza oven restaurants.

[GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl]

Does he drink beer?  We have small, craft, breweries around here that host beer-making parties with instruction, supplies, food, and beverages.  

[janee]

My guess is your Dad would like the family and friends gathering at your house. My sister-in-law used to do the family get togethers. It was a BBQ, we all brought a dish to share.  To make it easier, you could have it catered. For an event my SIL would have tons of games (croquet, bocce, badminton as well as card games, board games, musical chairs, etc.) All ages could participate and who ever "won" that game (often the youngest) would pick a prize from a bunch of wrapped up things in a basket. The prizes could be from the dollar store.  You could get crowns for the birthday twins.  The sillier it was, the more fun it was.  The pictures mean a lot to us now as most of the older generation is gone.

Enjoy whatever you decide!

[raeoflyte]

You all are making me feel a lot better about a party at my house. I love the idea of croquet and badminton and hiring a photographer.

[zibazinski]

He will enjoy it a lot more than something fancy.

[Deleted]

Two things have made my parents' landmark birthday parties special. One is definitely just having as many descendants as possible in attendance and plenty of picture-taking. Dad's 80th and Mom's 85th, as well as their 50th anniversary, we're all at the country club where my brother is a member.

The second: over a period of years, DH has been scanning in decades of slides and prints into electronic format. It's been a HUGE gift to the family. I learned to do slide shows with music and it's a joy to watch the reactions as everyone watches. This year the great-grandchildren got all excited when they saw their own pictures in the slideshow. It takes some planning but is well worth it if you have good pictures.

[kittensaver]

I think family parties at home can be wonderful. It really depends on your dad and what he wants. I know it's a (stereotypical) guy-thing to say "it doesn't matter," but often times deep down it does. The person is just being polite because you are doing a favor for them.

If you say, "hey, we're going to do something," he'll just say "fine, whatever" - BUT - if you present him with two (or three choices) I'm willing to bet he can and will express a preference for one of them.

When we were discussing my mother's 90th birthday party, she fell into the "fine, whatever you want to do" polite category, so I had to really think about it because she wasn't helping me (lol). Her church is very important to her - specifically, her choir involvement is very meaningful for her. So we did her party in stages: We arranged for her choir to sing at the 5 pm Mass on a Saturday (it was a public Mass), the priest called her up for a special blessing at the end of Mass, and then the entire congregation (including all the guests we specifically invited out there for her birthday) were invited out onto the church patio for cupcakes and champagne. That was about 200 people - and because she is very involved in her church she had a least a nodding acquaintance with many of them.

We then took our party of 80 (including us kids/grandkids/great-grandkids, her family from the Midwest who came out specifically for her birthday and many of her knitting buddies, community buddies and choir friends) out to dinner at a nice local restaurant. We had an open bar, a three-course dinner and a beautiful buffet of Italian desserts. It was a wonderful evening that people still talk about.

I only bring this up because, in the end, it suited her perfectly. [ETA: Her small home would never have held that many people, and my home is an hour away, so a home party was a non-starter.] But there was no way she was *ever* going to dream up something like that, let alone *ask* for it. Sometimes you just have to be a sleuth if you want to plan something that suits the person.

If your dad wants a family party, make it the best family party you can - and then don't worry about it. He'll love it, promise.  

[gooddecisions]

I would have it at home and cater the food. Get balloons, print lots of photos you can decorate with (see pinterest), play his favorite decade music and have activities that everyone can enjoy. You could even do a family fued or jeopardy type quiz show with questions about your dad (and aunt).

It's very nice of you to do this for your dad. I hope it's a success!

[debthaven]

I had DH's 60th at home last month ... 84 people. It nearly killed me but everybody had a really fantastic time. DH is in a band so his band performed, and then other people got up and played or sang. That was a lot of fun!

I prefer at home parties to sit-down dinners in a restaurant because people can walk around and talk to different people. In a restaurant you're sort of stuck talking to whoever you're sitting next to.

We made a lot of food but anybody who offered (and most people in our circle do) brought a dish. DH's cousins who came from the UK and our 4 kids helped a LOT but your kids are little. I asked people to bring savory dishes because I ordered the birthday cakes. We also supplied all the drinks.

If you can afford to have even part of it catered I would definitely have it at home.

And yes to the photographer ... my one regret about DH's party is that we were running around so much all evening we don't have any family pictures.

I also hired my cleaner to help out in the kitchen. She was fantastic and it meant we could be with the guests instead of in the kitchen (where the buffet was), although the kids all helped her out too. Perhaps you or your parents have someone who would be happy to spend the day / evening and make some extra money? We were thrilled to have A's help, and she was thrilled to make the extra money.

ETA: I don't remember where you live, ie what the climate is. Here it's temperate, it was April, and it was cold but there were a LOT of people. A friend / fellow band member lent us a tent we stuck up against the house. They all helped put it up, then DH and the kids took it down the next day. It was a HUGE help. You can also rent them, if you're renting tables / chairs / etc.

[TheOtherMe]

My mother told my sister and I that she did not want anything for the 80th birthdays of her and dad.  Her reasoning was that it was January and would be snowing so nobody would come.  We found out the hard way that she did want us to do something. 

We had a small party at their home for their 65th wedding anniversary.  It was DS and BIL, her four children, two spouses and two grandchildren, me, and each parents' siblings and their spouses.  It was less than 25 people.  My sister and I provided all food. 

For their 90th birthdays, mom was ill but she wanted a 90th birthday party.  She decided she wanted it in November for their January birthdays.  Her birthday was on January 2.  By then, they were living in an independent living facility, so we used their party room and kitchen.  Again, sister and I provided the food.  Since we had more room we invited anybody who wanted to come.  Family is aging and mom and dad lived 3 hours from siblings so a very small party.

We did family photos.  My niece's husband is an excellent photographer and he took them.

Forward to New Years Eve.  Mom is taken by ambulance to hospital in critical condition.  One of the things she keeps asking is what if I don't live to be 90?  We had the party.  That wasn't important at the time.  First thing she said when she woke up on January 2 was "I made it".  She was still in critical condition.  She managed to live until May 19.

[raeoflyte]

Party went well. I stole all of your suggestions and got many compliments on my fabulous hostess skills.

[CCL]

Jun 7, 2016 23:43:44 GMT -5 raeoflyte said:

Party went well. I stole all of your suggestions and got many compliments on my fabulous hostess skills.

So what did you end up doing? Catered at the house with photographer?

[raeoflyte]

Jun 8, 2016 14:55:52 GMT -5 CCL said:

Jun 7, 2016 23:43:44 GMT -5 raeoflyte said:

Party went well. I stole all of your suggestions and got many compliments on my fabulous hostess skills.

So what did you end up doing? Catered at the house with photographer?

Party at my house.  We ended up not catering, but my mom and I did pulled pork in the roaster and I made corn in the cob in crock pots, and just about everyone volunteered sides/cake, so it wasn't much work food wise.  Had bocce and badminton outside.  My uncle sent me a bunch of pictures of my dad and aunt when they were growing up and I printed those in 4x6's and put them on a big 70 that I put up on the wall with an important happenings in 1946 sign.  I had a photographer which I loved, although everyone else really relaxed after she left.  We had 60's music playing.  Really laid back which my dad liked, so I was happy.  

It has me thinking about my mom's 70'th in a couple years.  I cannot wait for my sisters 50th though.  Then I can do all the embarrassing stuff too!