Want to learn sign language

[Deleted]

DH is very hard of hearing.  He got a hearing aid from Costco, but he quit wearing it because he has eczema including in his ears.  

I knew it has gotten worse.  He will say what seems like totally random things in response to stuff I say. That means he didn't hear me but is actually guessing at what I say.

Today it was bad enough that he got rather angry at my "lack of enunciation."  So I asked him if it was getting worse, and he admitted that pretty much all he hears is "noise."  He talked about me speaking more clearly and more slowly.  The last is a laugh.  If a Southerner spoke any more slowly, I would be saying tomorrow what I started today.

I mentioned that I would like us to take sign language classes together.  I want to be able to communicate with him.  I told him that a lot of institutions, like hospitals, may have someone who can sign.  He didn't shoot the idea down.  He said it sounded interesting.

So where do people learn this?  I don't think we would do well with self-taught.  We need a structure and someone to level our learning experience.  I would end up trying to teach him, which isn't what we need.

Suggestions as to where to start?  If no one has started a business that provides sign language classes to partners, it is definitely a missed opportunity.  I used to have a joke that all men over 50 are somewhat deaf.  I have never met a woman who disagreed with me, be it father, husband, or whatever.

[zibazinski]

I took my classes at the local high school. The lady from church taught at the deaf school and did night school there.

[giramomma]

Technical college might offer sign language. Ours does.

[dannylion]

Our community college has a sign language curriculum. Yours may have one as well.  I'd check there first. 

 

[saveinla]

Our local adult school also offers this course.

[ken a.k.a OMK]

I doubt Cosco was a good source for hearing aids or testing. I paid $6k for mine. I was amazed at some of the tests they gave me. Letters that sound the same changed the meaning of what was spoken. For example "the cat is at the door" sounded like "the bat is at the door". I'd let the cat in but not the bat. But there were many examples like that which proved I was misunderstanding people. I also learned the improvement if I was looking at the speaker. Not reading lips but seeing and hearing are connected. Communication can be difficult. I wish you both success.

[Anne_in_VA]

Has your DH talked to his doctor about the eczema and treatments for it recently?  There are so many new treatments out there for things that couldn't be treated in the past that it might be worth asking about.  

As Ken said, Costco is typically the not best place to get hearing aids from.  My DH has about a 75% hearing loss and he used to get his from Beltone through a doctor who specialized in hearing loss.  Adjustments could be made from time to time for free too.  Be prepared to pay quite a bit for them though, I think his last pair were about $6k.

He got his newest ones through the VA and they're much better and allows him to hear quite a bit better than he did before.  When he asked about the cost, he was told they cost around $6k.

[trippypea]

My teen is profoundly deaf with a CI. I would start by checking with your local high school and community colleges. ASL is being offered at many high schools as a foreign language, so the teacher may have a bead on outside classes. Same thing goes with community colleges. If there are any deaf schools in your area, you can ask there too. I would also check with the Department of Aging or whatever that department is called to see what resources they can offer, in addition to the Office for the Deaf and HOH in your state. There is an agency in my area that provides "services and support for people with all kinds of disabilities" and they often run ASL workshops, so maybe your area has something like that too.

[Deleted]

Thanks, trippypea.  I'll check into that.

The problem is not the hearing aids or even the eczema, which is being treated by a dermatologist.  It is communication.  I am afraid he is going to find himself stuck in a world where he can't communicate with me or his doctors.  The time to prevent that is now, while he still has partial hearing. 

[cktc]

If you both want to learn a tutor might be a nice way to go. I'd look for ASL clubs in your area and see if anyone offers private lessons.

[ken a.k.a OMK]

I knew I had some hearing loss from working around Navy jets since the 70's. Hearing loss is accumulative. It never gets better. My wife convinced me it was time after I kept asking her to repeat things and watching TV was almost impossible. I went to a doctor of audiology to make sure there were no medical problems. You can hardly see my hearing aids. They are programmable wirelessly while sitting in a chair in her office.

[Abby Normal]

Feb 4, 2016 11:36:25 GMT -5 @bamafan1954 said:

Thanks, trippypea .  I'll check into that.

The problem is not the hearing aids or even the eczema, which is being treated by a dermatologist.  It is communication.  I am afraid he is going to find himself stuck in a world where he can't communicate with me or his doctors.  The time to prevent that is now, while he still has partial hearing. 

You need to go to a hearing specialist not costco.  Dh's grandfather was a whole world of difference once they changed his hearing aids. Before, he had settled into his own world, and didn't talk much at all.  Once he got the new ones, you couldn't shut him up. 
MIL- just recently got one that she can connect to a small microphone.  So when we are in restaurants, she can hook that up and focus on the converstation, and it filters out all the background noise.

Technology is amazing- but it's not cheap. 

[Lizard Queen]

Some random stuff:

Around here, not sure if it's everywhere, you can dial 211 for help finding resources.  I'd also check with the doctor's office, especially a specialist.  

My aunt started losing her hearing in her 50's.  She's 90+ now.  Along the way, she learned sign language and how to read lips.  When she's confused with the lip reading, she'll ask you to write down what you're saying.  She has hearing aids, but I doubt they help any more.  They tried cochlear implants, but they didn't work.

[GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl]

Feb 4, 2016 11:36:25 GMT -5 @bamafan1954 said:

Thanks, trippypea .  I'll check into that.

The problem is not the hearing aids or even the eczema, which is being treated by a dermatologist.  It is communication.  I am afraid he is going to find himself stuck in a world where he can't communicate with me or his doctors.  The time to prevent that is now, while he still has partial hearing. 

I also have a child with a hearing issue.  Since it is a hearing/verbal world and there is much beauty to be heard (music, rustling leaves, grandchildren, etc.), your DH should first see an audiologist -- preferably one at a major teaching hospital.  There are constant leaps in hearing loss treatments and in hearing aid technology that could really help him.  

Second, I second/third/fourth that you check the local schools in the area.  But, a good audiologist can also direct you to ASL instruction.  

Another option, although not nearly as common, is something called cued speech.  The speaker uses visual signals (I.e, a hand held horizontally at the throat to indicate a hard "c") to accompany spoken speech and help alleviate the kinds of problems Ken mentioned.  Cued speech is usually taught by speech therapists who work with hearing impaired (but not deaf) folks.

As for ASL instruction, ODS is taking ASL as his foreign language in college (basic Spanish courses -- considered the "easiest" foreign language to learn -- in middle school and repeated in high school were even too difficult given his hearing issues).  He loves the visual component and is wishing he'd learned ASL sooner (our old school district only offered oral-based hearing impaired programs -- a mix of the two might have been a better fit for ODS).  

I wish you both the best.  Hearing loss really changes one's relationship to the people and the world around him/her.  Don't let your DH settle and become isolated -- there is much that can be done for him (and so, for you as well) these days.

[973beachbum]

I think he needs to go back to a regular dr and tell them how his eczema is making him feel like he can't wear his hearing aids.  Maybe they are the wrong hearing aids or maybe his perception is that they are making it worse. 

DH comes from a long line of deaf people.  For the most part they wanted to go around without wearing their hearing aids but also expected everyone to make them understand what was being said at the same time.  They had these speakers on the phones that projected the person calling.  I swear I was driving down the street and could hear the person calling perfectly!  But if asked they would say the problem is they weren't talking loud enough. 

Maybe sign lang will work but I doubt any of them would have been patient enough to learn it or watch someone signing to them.    I would bet my bottom dollar that most would turn away after the first couple of signs anyone did.  My gut says it if was possible for them to be that attentive and do it, they would have figured out how to keep the aid in their ears. 

Then again DH's family is very stubborn.  Maybe your DH is more reasonable.  Good luck!

[violagirl]

I took several levels of ASL through my local college. It was very cheap. I think the biggest expense was the book. There must be lessons on Youtube too. 

I found it very easy to learn and it is always a pleasure to watch someone who REALLY knows it because my issue with ASL is that I do not use my body and face enough. You almost have to over exaggerate face and body movements to be really good at it. 

[Deleted]

Feb 4, 2016 11:49:59 GMT -5 ken a.k.a OMK said:

I knew I had some hearing loss from working around Navy jets since the 70's. Hearing loss is accumulative. It never gets better. My wife convinced me it was time after I kept asking her to repeat things and watching TV was almost impossible. I went to a doctor of audiology to make sure there were no medical problems. You can hardly see my hearing aids. They are programmable wirelessly while sitting in a chair in her office.

DH has this type, I think. It has a remote control. He was actually excited about them. Hearing aids at Costco aren't cheap (his were $4000), and, yes, an audiologist prescribed them.

It wasn't vanity that stopped him from wearing them.  It was the irritation inside of his ears.  That required he put lotion in them, and moisture/hearing aids aren't compatible.

[Artemis Windsong]

On my library site there is a class.  I have to sign onto the server with my library card and password.  I haven't tried it, yet.  It's on my list of things I want to do. I'll check out youtube.  Thanks for the idea.

I have a book mark with all the hand configurations for letters.

I play tennis with people who wear hearing aids.  I need to talk right to their face for them to hear me.  We have two hand signals. One for out and one for good.  It does get annoying when the hand signals aren't used.

A friend of mine got an inner ear virus and lost her hearing.  Her hearing aid is her telephone.  I don't know how it connects to her ear.

Another man I know had colecear inplants.  They used to be visible but now they aren't.

My former SIL had ear surgery in the early 90s to correct a hearing problem.  It was a hard thing for the family.  He traveled alone to another large city to get it done leaving my DD and grandkids home over Christmas.  The surgery worked.