Apple
Junior Associate
Always travel with a sense of humor
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Post by Apple on Sept 11, 2015 13:09:43 GMT -5
*poof*
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Deleted
Joined: Sept 29, 2024 20:28:36 GMT -5
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Sept 11, 2015 13:23:26 GMT -5
-hug-I am so so so so so sorry you had to go through that. Have some hugs and a LOT of drinks!! I am also very glad you are getting out and life will change for the better!!
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Wisconsin Beth
Distinguished Associate
No, we don't walk away. But when we're holding on to something precious, we run.
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Sept 11, 2015 13:27:27 GMT -5
-hug-I am so so so so so sorry you had to go through that. Have some hugs and a LOT of drinks!! I am also very glad you are getting out and life will change for the better!! Yes. Karma/reaping what you've sown, can be a bitch and I'm glad it's not waiting around to much for them - the infighting, not the getting hurt part.
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The Captain
Junior Associate
Hugs are good...
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Post by The Captain on Sept 11, 2015 13:30:07 GMT -5
Apple thanks for letting us know the outcome. I can't even imagine the pressure you were under. Kudos to you for being able to handle, and even beat it. Hopefully you new job will be everything the old one wasn't.
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Chocolate Lover
Distinguished Associate
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Sept 11, 2015 13:47:16 GMT -5
So glad it's over and I do hope karma bites them all hard.
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quince
Senior Member
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Post by quince on Sept 11, 2015 13:59:12 GMT -5
Lady, you are awesome. Ridiculously strong. I salute you.
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mmhmm
Administrator
It's a great pity the right of free speech isn't based on the obligation to say something sensible.
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Post by mmhmm on Sept 11, 2015 14:20:13 GMT -5
Thanks for sharing what happened to you, Apple. I'm so glad it's over for you and you can move on. I, too, doubt they'll have the time to focus on you. It sounds like they're going to be too busy effing each other over. I hope everything on the new job is as it should be and that you enjoy it. There are always problems that crop up but nobody should ever have to deal with constant harassment. Good for you for taking the whole mess where it needed to go!
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Jake 48
Senior Member
keeping the faith
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Post by Jake 48 on Sept 11, 2015 14:21:47 GMT -5
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Jaguar
Administrator
Fear does not stop death. It stops life.
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Post by Jaguar on Sept 11, 2015 14:31:11 GMT -5
You are a survivor and the victor. You are amazing strength.
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ken a.k.a OMK
Senior Associate
They killed Kenny, the bastards.
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Post by ken a.k.a OMK on Sept 11, 2015 14:45:57 GMT -5
Apple. I know it has been a tough situation to get through. The future looks great.
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muttleynfelix
Junior Associate
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Post by muttleynfelix on Sept 11, 2015 14:53:45 GMT -5
Hugs Apple. Best of luck on your new job.
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NancysSummerSip
Community Leader
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Today's Mood: Full of piss and vinegar
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Sept 11, 2015 15:23:54 GMT -5
Apple, the entire story deserves a bigger audience. If you feel you can, you should see about getting it out in some form of media. I realize this risks exposure - of you, your son, the company, your tormentors. But it's the kind of story that needs to be told in a bigger format. It shows that even though it's 2015, we might as well be working women forty or more years ago. It shows that unless someone stands up to the good old boy network and kicks it in the balls, nothing will change. It shows what can be done when a woman has the guts and spine to decide not to take it anymore. Sometimes, you can negotiate. And sometimes, negotiations fail and you have to go toe-to-Terminator with these trolls.
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Artemis Windsong
Senior Associate
The love in me salutes the love in you. M. Williamson
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Post by Artemis Windsong on Sept 11, 2015 15:37:44 GMT -5
I'm so sorry this happened to you. I hope you go to a better place. I pray they don't carry this over to your next workplace.
Sometimes it's difficult to explain the undercurrent of the office bullies while it's happening. A person never knows when and how they will strike. A person's everyday, every night, every outing and every relationship is colored with the brush of sadness to outright anxiety/depression.
-------------- I agree with Nancy. Perhaps you could sell it. I don't recall the site that would accept original writing for publication. Maybe someone is using it.
Best wishes going forward and I hope you heal quickly.
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taz157
Senior Associate
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Post by taz157 on Sept 11, 2015 16:15:53 GMT -5
So glad it's over and I do hope karma bites them all hard. Yeah that! ((((Hugs)))))
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Post by mojothehelpermonkey on Sept 11, 2015 16:41:00 GMT -5
Thank you for sharing this, and I am glad that you are moving on to a new position. At the very least, you have probably made it easier for the next woman who works at this company. My SO is an electrician, and he has worked in some bad crews. He walked off one job after another guy was fired over something that was the foreman's fault. A few of the other guys lied for the foreman, but my SO told the truth. When he asked the higher up people why they didn't believe his version, they said that they did but it was just easier to fire the other guy.
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Deleted
Joined: Sept 29, 2024 20:28:36 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Sept 11, 2015 17:13:45 GMT -5
Sleep, heal, breathe - you are amazing! Someday you can share this story with your son, and with others, to help change the culture that makes the evil possible. For now just live in the knowledge that each future day will be better than the past one.
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zibazinski
Community Leader
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 11, 2015 17:31:23 GMT -5
I'd publish it anonymously No way they can prove its your story. Especially if there's a history of this shit going on.
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zibazinski
Community Leader
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 11, 2015 19:45:39 GMT -5
You're a better person than I. I'm one for going down in flames. I get mad then I get even.
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Deleted
Joined: Sept 29, 2024 20:28:36 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Sept 11, 2015 20:32:24 GMT -5
Apple, I'm soooo glad you can start putting that behind you and move on to a new and improved phase of your life. I've been rooting for you the whole time, it's great that you got a resolution that gives you some peace. It took a lot of courage to not cave under pressure and keep fighting for what was right. You're awesome! Much success at your new job. And hugs for all the shit you've gone through with those fools you worked with.
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flamingo
Well-Known Member
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Post by flamingo on Sept 11, 2015 20:35:07 GMT -5
Congratulations on making it through, and coming out stronger. And, congrats on the new job! You definitely deserve it. I'm glad it's a better option than being 5 hours away from your son.
I see both sides of going public with this. While I definitely get Nancy's and Zib's points, I'm more of a take the high road, do things by the book, then quietly move on kinda person. So I get not wanting to go public or be the center of attention for all of this.
Whatever you decide going forward, know that you are a strong person and have handled things well thus far. You are a role model for your son.
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Knee Deep in Water Chloe
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Post by Knee Deep in Water Chloe on Sept 11, 2015 21:24:07 GMT -5
Holy crap.
Wow, you dealt with that for so long.
I'm so sorry. I'm glad you're in a better place now.
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sesfw
Junior Associate
Today is the first day of the rest of my life
Joined: Dec 21, 2010 15:45:17 GMT -5
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Post by sesfw on Sept 11, 2015 21:35:45 GMT -5
Best wishes going forward and I hope you heal quickly.
Y ou fought a good fight ........ and finally got away from the BS.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Sept 11, 2015 22:18:45 GMT -5
I'm sorry you went through this, I am so glad for you and grateful for the rest of us that you fought it. These kinds of things are why I am a vocal feminist. This kind of thing is obviously still happening and women like yourself need to know that there are a lot of us that support you in spirit even if we aren't right at your side. And thank goodness you have those close to you that supported you and tried to help you. Hopefully that group is growing and eventually the assholes will be outnumbered and not get away with it. Thank you so much for fighting for yourself and by proxy for the women that will come after you.
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tcu2003
Senior Member
Joined: Dec 31, 2010 15:24:01 GMT -5
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Post by tcu2003 on Sept 11, 2015 22:43:05 GMT -5
Wow, Apple, I'm so angry for you, and all that you've had to deal with in your jobs with this employer - that is complete and utter bullcrap and it ticks me off to no end that so many people in the chain overlooked, avoided, enabled and caused these extreme levels of harassment and retaliation. And for the inspector to also do so - my blood boils. These people should not be able to sleep well night - I hope some day you can report to us that karma has come back to bite every single one of them in the arse.
Congrats on finally being able to move on, and for sticking with this and hopefully causing positive change to be able to someday occur at this site, even if it will be too little/too late for you. Also, please make sure you scan and/or copy the binder of evidence you have, and store the copies in at least two different locations. That is probably me being overly paranoid, but these abusers have shown they'll go to great lengths to get away with what they can, and having backups of the evidence is one more way to protect you and anyone who may need it in the future.
Hugs, lady - you are an incredibly strong and brave woman. I don't know if you're on FB and follow the A Mighty Girl page, but I feel like your story is just the kind of female trailblazing story that would be a great feature there someday.
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NancysSummerSip
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 19, 2010 19:19:42 GMT -5
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Today's Mood: Full of piss and vinegar
Favorite Drink: Anything with ice
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Sept 12, 2015 13:24:23 GMT -5
Apple, the entire story deserves a bigger audience. If you feel you can, you should see about getting it out in some form of media. I realize this risks exposure - of you, your son, the company, your tormentors. But it's the kind of story that needs to be told in a bigger format. It shows that even though it's 2015, we might as well be working women forty or more years ago. It shows that unless someone stands up to the good old boy network and kicks it in the balls, nothing will change. It shows what can be done when a woman has the guts and spine to decide not to take it anymore. Sometimes, you can negotiate. And sometimes, negotiations fail and you have to go toe-to-Terminator with these trolls. Believe me, it has been tempting, but yes, there are privacy concerns. And, at least for now, I wouldn't want any more to fall on DS because of it. Maybe, after some distance, and when I really feel secure, I could, but not right now. I kind of feel like even putting it here is risky :/ I don't want the publicity around it when I'm trying to start on a new crew, new job, etc. Thing is, women do get labeled, and it can take a long time for that label, no matter how untrue, to wash off, if it ever does. Even in Idaho, they knew the rumors, and it was hard to go in there for an interview knowing they had this preconceived idea of me. Fortunately, I think they did give me a real chance, since two former coworkers worked there and really wanted me to get the job. One of the coworkers flat out asked the boss "Why would you punish the victim? Give her an interview, you'll like her." Another on the panel had "heard all about me". That scared me a moment until he said who he heard about me from (it was the guy who sent the congratulations email, seriously respect that guy). Thing is, if I didn't have those three people rooting for me, I would never have got the interview, because my new "reputation" got there before I could. And, this employer is everywhere and can destroy a person. So, not yet. And my concern is also for your son's safety. Given what these mentally deficient morons have already done to YOU, I don't think they would hesitate to stop there. Your son could be targeted in retaliation.
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zibazinski
Community Leader
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 12, 2015 14:01:03 GMT -5
Nah, they're cowards. Soon you'll get your revenge. Keep every last bit of evidence and your texts aren't lost btw. They can be recovered. Even if you have to wait until you're retired, don't let them get away with it. I'd see a publisher and ask about protecting your anonymity I'm sure it can be done.
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lund
Familiar Member
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Post by lund on Sept 12, 2015 14:22:56 GMT -5
Good that you got away, Apple!
I agree with the pp: Keep a low profile as long as your son goes to school. Talk about security with him just in case.
Then, phone your mobile phone company and ask if you can get print-outs of your received texts, if necessary for a fee. If possible and the fee not too high, I think that you should order them (if possible notarized) and then put the print-outs in the bank.
(Here, texts are stored for two years. The police and justice people can sub-poena them.)
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Lizard Queen
Senior Associate
103/2024
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Post by Lizard Queen on Sept 12, 2015 14:30:30 GMT -5
Apple, I have no words. That about covers it.
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Robert not Bobby
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Post by Robert not Bobby on Sept 12, 2015 14:40:28 GMT -5
Apple, is this your therapy? Don't let it be...but it is always good to vent.
I don't say or mean that in a snarky kind of way.
You seem like you have gone through some bad experiences, which keep happening again and again. You work in a male dominated environment where, I guess, they see you as a play thing or a nuisance. I wouldn't put up with that ...Ok, I'm a guy, but I still wouldn't put up with the small shits that you have described.
So gather yourself up, be rational and make decisions.
The glass is always half full.
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debthaven
Senior Associate
Joined: Apr 7, 2015 15:26:39 GMT -5
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Post by debthaven on Sept 12, 2015 14:49:27 GMT -5
I wouldn't put up with that ...
How convenient! Because you probably wouldn't have to, duh!
Why is it that however well-meaning you always claim to be, somehow, your posts never seem to come off that way?
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