My Daily Dose of Madness

[Deleted]

I swear I feel like I'm surrounded by crazy people half the time. And yep, I've often wondered if it's really me that's crazy and not them.

I've had a terrible day. I had some issues at work that upset my nerves, but in reality, my job sucks half the time anyway. I didn't like what happened today, but I can shake that off.

THEN, on my way home I talked to my Mom, who I don't talk to often because it just gets to be too much sometimes. She asked about DD and my grandkids and I told her a little about how DD irritated me last night. A few minutes after I got off the phone with Mom, DD calls and asks what I'd said to my Mom. Apparently Mom got off the phone with me and called DD and went off about a bunch of shit that had nothing to do with what I'd said. Then DD sends me a nasty text ending with how NONE of us will see her kids again. Then Mom texts me and says when she sees DD again, she's going to smack her. Apparently DD called Mom back and cussed her. So Mom says she's coming to my house because DD is suppose to be coming to get all her stuff from my house. I'm like WTF is happening right now?!

I told her NOBODY needs to come to my house, I'm sick of all the drama and everybody needs to leave me the hell alone. I was obviously agitated so she calmed down and apologized but I didn't want to hear it. That kind of drama is exactly why I don't talk to her that much.

I'm pissed at me, because I shouldn't have said anything at all to my Mom. I'm pissed at my Mom because she took the little I did say and went off on a tangent and blasted DD. I'm pissed at DD for her nasty texts to me and most of all for having the nerve to say I won't see my grandbabies again after everything I've done for her and them these past few years. I've done a hell of a lot for her and those babies. She's had some serious shit going on, stuff that I don't talk about here or to anyone IRL (that my Mom still doesn't even know) and I've been there for her when NOBODY else would help her. It's ALWAYS something. And that's what you want to tell me?

I'm beyond furious. All I wanted to do was come home from a bad day at work and relax, but all hell broke loose. I told DD not to come to my house today either, I don't care what belongings she's trying to get. I need a chance to cool off from those texts so I don't say or do anything I'll regret. I'm trying my best to act like I have some sense just because she's my daughter and my filter usually disappears when I get this upset. But she's still texting me about coming to get her stuff even though I've warned her today is not the day and told her we'll talk later. I feel like my head is just going to pop off my neck. This has never happened and I'm done.

So how was your day? lol

[msventoux]

So sorry you're having such a crappy day. 

You sound like a coworker and her family, there's always something going on between the 3 generations of women and never seeing the grandkids again is a frequent threat.  That blows over once the daughter needs free childcare again. 

In retrospect my day has been fabulous...and stories like yours make me really glad I never had kids. 

[Tennesseer]

Here are a couple of tickets to get awat from your family.  You are travelling under the name Holz/Richardson so your family cannot trace you.   Bon voyage!. 

[kjto1]

[Jaguar]

<<< BIG HUGS >>>

[NancysSummerSip]

So how was your day? lol

Not anywhere near as bad as yours.

You're in the middle of a very volatile family sandwich - you have a mother who cannot keep a confidence when it's been shared, and a daughter whose fuse seems to be set off by very little and whose memory of what family has done for her seems to be very short.

I like the idea of declaring your house a drama-free zone for a bit. Take no calls and see none of them. If DD wants her stuff, and you feel she cannot or should not enter the house, put the stuff outside for her to pick up. Using the knowledge you have about your DD's issues to try and work things out probably won't work; she likely will see it as a form of emotional blackmail. Let her take her stuff and the kids and go wherever she is going (a place of her own, I presume). It doesn't sound like she will be able to keep the kids away for long. They know their Gramma and love their Gramma, and your DD does not sound like she can make it without you.

As for Mom...I'd skip sharing anything about family with her, since her ability to zip it and keep quiet doesn't seem to function. It may be her age, or it just may be her.

[NoNamePerson]

Tell them you are moving and feel free to write to you but you are taking your mailbox with you.

Or just put belongings on porch but don't forget to change the locks. 

Oh and   .  


ETA. See that Nancy already suggested putting stuff out side!!

[Deleted]

Aug 2, 2015 19:40:35 GMT -5 msventoux said:

So sorry you're having such a crappy day. 

You sound like a coworker and her family, there's always something going on between the 3 generations of women and never seeing the grandkids again is a frequent threat.  That blows over once the daughter needs free childcare again. 

In retrospect my day has been fabulous...and stories like yours make me really glad I never had kids. 

Thank you. I'm glad SOMEBODY had a fabulous day!

[Deleted]

Aug 2, 2015 20:33:25 GMT -5 @sroo4 said:

Yuk..why does all this kind of thing happen on the day you know you should have stayed in bed and pulled the covers over your head. I hope you are home now with your feet up, an adult beverage of your choice, and the sound of silence. 

I'm sitting on my bed. I had an adult beverage but now I have a serious headache, so I switched to lemonade. Playing music. I probably should just go to sleep so tomorrow will hurry and get here lol.

[Deleted]

Just  from me too... Hope tomorrow is better.

[Opti]

Pink, sorry to hear that. My day yesterday was horrible for the bulk of my shift. Today was better but seemed like forever. I work tomorrow in the morning after closing today, so the last thing I want is for tomorrow to hurry to be here!

Sorry about the drama, but as a 55 year old, one thing one learns about people is how to not let them push your buttons. (Its why I love living in NJ away from my sisters, for one. )

Some people love to take anything negative and twist it, and your Mom sounds like one of them. So in the future, never ever, if you can help it, tell her anything that is not positive to neutral. I think I am having a similar issue at work with the new FTer who is a shit spreader and liar, so I am going to starve her of information and talk from me, and she'll have to work harder to be an ass. At least to me. So continue to cut your Mom off and read the riot act to DD. Or at least bark enough she knows you are Mom(alpha) and she is not.

JMO.

I need some tickets too BTW.

[happyhoix]

I can't stand drama.

My mom and little sister are this way. Mom now has dementia and can't remember things well enough to stir up shit, and after my little sister's last melt down to me about two years ago, I had  melt down of my own. This went over very poorly because little sister is one of those highly critical people who have zero tolerance for being criticized. She's been in full sulk mode ever since which means she's refusing to text or call me -I doubt she realizes how happy it makes me that I don't have to deal with her drama.

Life is hard enough without family members like this.

[NancysSummerSip]

Happyhoix, I recall the stuff about your sister being a butt; did not know about your mom, though. It's a real stinker that your sister cannot just put it aside and do what needs to be done for Mom as a family unit.

Pink - it's your house, your life, your rules. There has to be peace under your roof before anything else will make sense. Let the fractious factions know that. The minute they start up their nonsense, you will shut them down. I've had to cut out relatives because of their lying, cheating and stealing ways. I cannot make them stop, but I can remove myself from their conduct.

[GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl]

There was a full moon this weekend -- the second in a month -- that alone causes all sorts of madness.  

[gs11rmb]

I'm sorry you had such a bad day.  If you have time today you might want to look at this - it's only 2 minutes long and I find it very helpful in stressful situations.  F*ck That: A Guided Meditation:

[NoNamePerson]

Aug 3, 2015 10:25:49 GMT -5 GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl said:

There was a full moon this weekend -- the second in a month -- that alone causes all sorts of madness.  

I blame it on a full Sun. It's always full.     

[Deleted]

Aug 3, 2015 11:01:04 GMT -5 @tbird said:

sorry to hear this Pink! Sounds awful.

I think the best course of action would be to apologize to your DD for saying anything to your Mom, and emphasize that your mother took one off hand comment you made and created a huge deal out of it, embellishing, etc. and say that you should have known better than to even mention anything to her.

Then tell DD that you were disappointed that she reacted so strongly, that you obviously care about her and the gbabies, and that you are committed as always, to their best interests.

I hope this would then blow over quickly.

I did apologize to DD today for saying anything to my Mom. DD apologized for being disrespectful, and admitted that the thing that irritated me Saturday wasn't a good decision on her part.

I'm still mad at my Mom. Yesterday when I told her not to come to my house and she realized I'd gotten agitated, she apologized and said all that wasn't good for her heart (she had a heart attack last November). So she was going to go take some tablet and put it under her tongue or something. As if I was the one calling and texting people going off and talking crazy and talking about smacking people and driving to my house to smack somebody and she was the injured party with a bad heart that can't handle all the chaos that was happening.  

Anyway, I rode the hell out of my bike this morning. It was some good stress relief.

[happyhoix]

Aug 3, 2015 11:12:33 GMT -5 NoNamePerson said:

Aug 3, 2015 10:25:49 GMT -5 GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl said:

There was a full moon this weekend -- the second in a month -- that alone causes all sorts of madness.  

I blame it on a full Sun. It's always full.     

Full sun and always frigging hot and humid. Here, anyway.

If I ever become an ax murderer it will be in August.

[happyhoix]

Aug 3, 2015 12:48:21 GMT -5 @pinkcshmere said:

Aug 3, 2015 11:01:04 GMT -5 @tbird said:

sorry to hear this Pink! Sounds awful.

I think the best course of action would be to apologize to your DD for saying anything to your Mom, and emphasize that your mother took one off hand comment you made and created a huge deal out of it, embellishing, etc. and say that you should have known better than to even mention anything to her.

Then tell DD that you were disappointed that she reacted so strongly, that you obviously care about her and the gbabies, and that you are committed as always, to their best interests.

I hope this would then blow over quickly.

I did apologize to DD today for saying anything to my Mom. DD apologized for being disrespectful, and admitted that the thing that irritated me Saturday wasn't a good decision on her part.

I'm still mad at my Mom. Yesterday when I told her not to come to my house and she realized I'd gotten agitated, she apologized and said all that wasn't good for her heart (she had a heart attack last November). So she was going to go take some tablet and put it under her tongue or something. As if I was the one calling and texting people going off and talking crazy and talking about smacking people and driving to my house to smack somebody and she was the injured party with a bad heart that can't handle all the chaos that was happening.  

Anyway, I rode the hell out of my bike this morning. It was some good stress relief.

Does anyone remember that show Samford and Son?

[Deleted]

Yup. I do. lol

[Deleted]

It just never stops.

My daughter just sent me a text saying she'd just talked to her Dad. My Mom called him last night. My grandson was over there and my Mom got smart with him about that. I don't care for my ex, but I don't have a problem with him spending time with our grandkids. I'm GLAD he spends time with them. Then she went on another tangent about my daughter and told him she was going to try to have my grandkids taken from my daughter. WTF?!

And do what with them? My Mom certainly can't take care of them. If you think my daughter is a horrible parent, talk to her and/or try to help her..... don't go ranting and raving about having her kids taken away from her. If I honestly thought my daughter was an unfit parent or didn't give a damn about her kids, I'd try to convince her to leave the babies with me before I ran to the state on her. And I see my daughter and my grandbabies every.single.day. Even when she doesn't live here it seems like she does. My Mom might see them for a couple hours every few months or so. She popped up at my house last week and my grandson barely knew who she was. The baby is over a year old and my Mom hasn't seen her TEN TIMES! So who's a better judge of what's going on?

Now DD is bent out of shape all over again, understandably so. My Mom and my ex aren't friends, he and I aren't even friends, we don't talk at all, we're just cordial when we run into each other. Why the hell would she call him with that shit. I had no idea she'd included him in all the havoc she was wreaking yesterday. I don't think all that much of him, but I don't think he's lying on my Mom. o.m.g.

My Mom has been kind of a drama queen for a long time. I'm starting to wonder if she's losing it. Now what the fuck am I suppose to do?

[Deleted]

Does she maybe need medical interventions? This seems really erratic..?

[NoNamePerson]

Let me know when you need help digging up that mailbox. I have expertise in that area, even if anchored in concrete.   

[Deleted]

I'd have daughter and ex husband block her number... They don't need to talk to her. Right? 

[Jaguar]

Ban your toxic mom from your life and I'm so sorry.

[gs11rmb]

I'm so sorry.  Is your mother elderly?  Do you think she is starting to show signs of dementia?

[Deleted]

Aug 3, 2015 14:19:44 GMT -5 oped said:

Does she maybe need medical interventions? This seems really erratic..?

I don't know. I can barely think straight. Like I said, my Mom has always been a bit of a drama queen. And she really is stressed half the time because of my trifling brother. Something is going on with them, but I haven't asked her about it because I told her I was done with him and all their drama some years ago.

I think something was already bothering her yesterday because when we talked, she really wanted me to come take her to my Aunt's house but my Aunt wasn't answering the phone. My Mom said she just wanted to get away from her house. I think maybe whatever was bothering her, it was easier to jump DD and do all that crazy stuff she did, than to deal with whatever her real issue is. I didn't put that together until later last night when I remembered her saying she wanted to go to my Aunt's.

This is too much. I want to run away.

[Deleted]

She's 65 years old.

[Deleted]

How old is she? 

I'd start with the others blocking her number.

If you blocked her number, would she be able to care for herself? Who is her medical representative?

[Deleted]

Aug 3, 2015 14:46:58 GMT -5 oped said:

How old is she? 

I'd start with the others blocking her number.

If you blocked her number, would she be able to care for herself? Who is her medical representative?

My daughter and my ex can block her.

I can't in good conscience block her number. I already don't answer half her calls, if she sends me an urgent text I'll call her. I love her and she's always been there for me when I've needed her or just wanted her there and she does have some health issues now. I have distanced myself out of self-preservation, but I won't completely abandon her. Medical what?