Emotional Eating

[Bonny]

The Fiscal vs Physical Health Thread made me pause.

While technically not obese, I have always had weight issues. In my teenage years I went through a couple of rounds of anorexia and bulimia and as an adult will engage in some binge eating, especially at night.

I gather a few of you have gone through this yourselves. Anybody really turn a corner on it? How did you make it happen?

Many thanks for your thoughts.

[chen35]

I keep hoping someone will respond to you. I am an emotional eater. Sometimes I have a better handle on it than others, but I'm at an out of control eating point right now.

[The Captain]

I kinda went in the opposite direction.  Not emotional eating, but emotional lack of eating.

I was always the chubby one.  The only one in my family so it wasn't about what we I ate.

My brother and sister were thin, I was wearing a size 16 in 6th grade.  I could tell you the story about the empty can of cake frosting that my parents found under my bed and punished me for, only to have my younger sister later tell them she saw my brother hide it there.  If something food wise was eaten/missing it was always assumed it was me who did it, makes sense right?  It took several of these events for my brother to finally admit he was sneaking the stuff (apparently pot makes you hungry all the time).

When I hit HS I really restricted calories, to unhealthy levels.  I didn't like my body and punished myself by not taking care of it.  Family dynamics didn't help things much either.

Messed up, eh? 

For one summer breakfast was an orange.  Lunch was a yogurt and an apple or banana.  Dinner was with family so kinda had to eat normal but no dessert for me. (no, they didn't know what I was doing since I was at work most of the day).

I biked two miles each way to and from work.  Worked a very physical job in a greenhouse.  Ate about 1000 calories a day.

Got down to a svelt 190 on a 5'4" frame.  Friends would tell me I didn't look like I weighted that much but I thought they were just trying to be nice.  I look back on pictures now and realize I was in great shape and carrying a lot of muscle.

My mom finally noticed a personality change and forced me to go see a doctor.  The blood panel came back all messed up an my iron, B and vitamin D levels were way too low, calcium levels too high.  Dr. somehow figured things out and asked me how much I was eating. 

I was honest.

Got a massive lecture about doing long term harm during my most important growing period and was put in a medically supervised weight loss program.  Followed it to the letter and still didn't loose weight, but I did feel much better mentally and physically than I had in a long time.

I knew I followed the program as prescribed, and my weight still remained on.  I then decided I could starve myself my whole life (and be miserable and likely shorten it) or I could focus on eating healthy  and learn to accept the body I'm in.

Except for chronically low iron, my blood chemistry is better than most athletes (according to my doctor). When my lungs are behaving I walk 2.5 miles a day.  I'm the one who always takes half of her meal out to go. I have a balanced diet that is better than many of my skinnier co-workers and I've gotten used to being asked "Is that all you're going to eat?" like they can't believe a chubbers would leave food on the plate.

I'm now in my later 40's and am FINALLY dressing a bit sexier for the first time (much to DH's delight!). It's still a battle and probably always will be, but at least it's only within my own mind because I will tell anyone to fuck off who dares to judge me for my body.

Don't know if this is helpful to anyone, but please feel free to share if you think it will help.  I waited far too long to grow a set.

[Bonny]

Love your story The Captain!

[thyme4change]

I am not an emotional eater, but I am an emotional drinker. One time something happened that made me really angry and the first thing I did was go into the kitchen and open a beer. I am constantly trying to monitor that, but every night I feel like I need a glass.of wine, you know because I am so stressed out.

Somehow people think it is very different. But I see it much the same.

[bean29]

I have never been anorexic or bulimic but controlled my weight obsessively when I was in my Mid 20's with diet and exercise. Like Captain, I ate a dry English muffin for breakfast, salad for lunch and a lean dinner. I had lower calorie counts if Mom was also dieting and I was living at home.

At my lowest I weight 117 lbs on a 5'2' Frame. I maintained 119 for many years. When I had my first I think I gained 30 lbs so I was max 150.  Within the last few years I hit a weight within a lb or two of that. I lost about 20 lbs last summer, now I have prolly put 5-10 back on.

I consider myself to still eat pretty healthy, but I am not obsessive about anything. Now my stress reliever to watch is alcohol. Telling myself I can't afford the calories helps me avoid it. Foods I stress eat are Ritz Crackers and red licorice.  If I just stop buying them I am way more likely to stick to a diet. 

So far today I ate a Bagel, an apple, and a small stack of Ritz crackers (my bad) and Oatmeal for lunch. I have chicken breasts out for supper.

I need to lose at least 5 lbs before DD's Grad on the 20th.

[mmhmm]

I have the opposite problem. Under stress I tend not to eat. I just don't think about it. I don't feel hunger, really. Because of this, I have to fight to keep my weight up. My daughter, however, has the opposite problem. We've realized the two problems are really the same thing, just manifesting differently. It's a difficult problem either way.

[jeep108]

I like to eat when I'm bored.  If I can keep myself busy, I'm good.   Work is the worst in the summer time. We are slow and people buy ice cream, cakes, cookies and donuts.  I've been getting up to take walks when I get the urge.  I've been trying to track calories with My Fitness Pal just so that if I want to eat something high in calories I will think twice about it.  I've been staying in the 1500 to 1700 range.  The week of my period is a little more tough for me to fight the boredom and my cravings.

[Jaguar]

I have to force myself to eat, and it's always been this way. I used to have fights with my mom cause she wanted me to eat something. I think on what Thyme posted about being Hangry, so hungry that your angry. It's been a real process to just let it go. I realized it was my way of controlling my world, when I was younger.

I'm thankful that when I binge I do it on fruit and salads and stuff. Pop/soda and chips and whatnot just does not appeal to me.

[Jaguar]

Bonny this is such a really good subject. Thanks

[resolution]

I have had a problem ever since I started working from home. I was fine at the office; I had set work hours and tried to keep my lunch and breaks at a similar time every day. Working from home I can literally walk 10 feet to my desk and sit there all day working, and my hours fluctuate around time zone differences.

I have a problem getting up and wandering around the house just to get away from the computer and take a break, and end up eating a snack as a part of my break. Quite a few times I am expecting a call during my lunch, so I don't leave the house to go on a walk, instead I sit around and wait for the call.

In five years of telecommuting I ended up gaining 30 pounds. I have lost 10 of it over the last year, but have ended up at a plateau weight where I am not happy with my shape. I am trying to get the motivation to get started on the weight loss and exercise plan again.

[Sharon]

I am absolutely positively an emotional eater.  Tired, frustrated, bored grab something to eat.  Having troubles figuring out a problem a work, take a break and go get something out of the vending machine at work.  My real weaknesses are breads and cookies.

[ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ]

There's an opposite end of the spectrum too - emotional NON-eating.

About a decade ago I suffered some emotional/physical trauma that threw me into the world of Anorexia Nervosa.

I won't go into the details of my story and what led to my (former) condition and story behind what (or rather WHO) drove me there on a public message board, because frankly, there are (some) people here who would eat it up (pun intended) and relish in the details of someone else's misery or pain.

I will say that it took a LOT of inner-strength, help from medical professionals and climbing out of the pits of hell and back up the mountain to heal and and become a whole and healthy person again.

If not for that, I might not be here today. There is help for those who seek it.

[busymom]

<Busy raises her hand.> I'm sure I'm an emotional eater. Food was frequently used to comfort us by Mom as we were growing up.  During college, although I really was in good shape (I played sports in high school & college), I decided I wasn't thin enough, & dieted myself down to what I thought at the time was good, but seeing old pictures of myself now I realize I was NOT the healthy-kind of thin. I looked more like a too-thin survivor of a prison camp.

Even now, when I feel myself getting stressed out over something, & I have some time, I tend to bake. I'm trying hard NOT to pass this onto my DD.

[msventoux]

I tend to be a mindless eater.  If I'm bored or trying to stay awake I'll use food, but I don't tend to turn to food if I have emotional upheaval.  I do have issues related to food though and eating around others. 

I was super skinny for a long time while everyone else in my family was obese.  I ate what I considered a normal amount of food, but they were always trying to force me to eat more food because I was too thin.  If I did, well then I must be bulimic (I wasn't) because who could eat that much and stay so skinny.  My food choices and the amount of food I ate was far too often a subject for debate by others in the family, and there were also many snide remarks about my figure by some members.

It got so that I hated to eat around other people as I was going to be judged no matter what I ate.  I took to wearing multiple layers of sweaters, sweatshirts and jackets so I could have the appearance of more bulk.  I still feel a bit self-conscious eating around other people.  Of course, now I don't exactly need the appearance of more bulk and wish I had that metabolism back. 

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

I go back and forth. I picked up the habit when I was depressed after having Gwen and then when things got straightened out I stopped.

I have been back to doing it since I found out about losing my job back in January.  I couldn't yell at my boss since I needed him as a reference and I can't yell at prospective employers and it's not right to take it out on my family so I started making regular trips to the cafeteria for junk food. I justified it by saying I need the extra calories while breastfeeding.

It's easier to control right now since I don't have easy access to junk food, but I am finding it still slips into my cart when I go grocery shopping and before I know it I've eaten an entire box of brownies or I drive down to Dunkin Donuts to buy some munchkins and eat all but 5 of them (out of 25)

I'm also back to drinking insane amounts of Coke on a regular basis.  I am working on stopping that too.

Weight wise I am fine, I am actually underweight. That's not going to last forever though and I don't want to end up like my grandma. It all caught up to her in her mid-40's and she ended up with Type 2 diabetes.

I need to find a healthier outlet for all my anger/frustration.  Eating junk soothes a short term problem but it's going to create long term problems if I don't knock it off.

It's hard to talk about with people b/c since I am underweight they don't think it's a big deal and ENCOURAGE me to keep doing it b/c "there's no harm in  you eating a few extra calories".

DH gets it though b/c he is the same way and was underweight till his 30s.  Now he constantly struggles and doesn't want me to end up the same way

[Bonny]

Thanks you guys for sharing your stories. There's a lot of us out there, aren't there?

[weltschmerz]

Got a massive lecture about doing long term harm during my most important growing period and was put in a medically supervised weight loss program. Followed it to the letter and still didn't loose weight, but I did feel much better mentally and physically than I had in a long time.

No kidding! I have a friend who was down to black coffee, lettuce leaves, 2 melba toasts and a packet of ketchup a day. She was in her early 20s. She's in her 50s now and her metabolism is still messed up from such long periods of starvation.