Non-child executors

[MN-Investor]

Not everyone has responsible adult children to be the executors of their estate. If an adult child is not the executor of your estate, who is? And how much detail do they know of your current financial situation?

[kristi28]

I am the child executor of my parent's estate. I have some vague idea of its value (as in, somewhere between 1-2 mil), and I know where I need to go to look for their assets in the event that something happens to them. I also know approximately how their estate will be divided. They are giving 25% to various charities, with the remainder being divided between myself and my sibs. I don't know (or need to know) more details of their financial life at this point.

[skubikky]

Anyone whom one would trust and know has the ability to carry out the responsibilities.

With minor children there would be a trustee in addition to those named as guardians. A crucial designation as it might be beneficial for the trustee and guardians to be different people.

My DSIL and DBIL were named as guardians when my kids were minors. I assigned my mother as executrix and trustee of the estate. DSIL and DBIL did not have the financial acumen to handle the responsibilities of managing investments and the good stewardship skills to use the monies in the fairest and most appropriate ways. For them it would have been a bit of conflict of interest as our estate would have been able to provide things for our children that they could not provide for their own.

ETA: An executor doesn't necessarily need to know in advance the details of an estate. It would help, but isn't necessary

[Gardening Grandma]

Mar 9, 2011 14:24:29 GMT -5 MN-Investor said:

Not everyone has responsible adult children to be the executors of their estate. If an adult child is not the executor of your estate, who is? And how much detail do they know of your current financial situation?

My SIL is the executor for both DH and myself. She's a former attorney and absolutely trustworthy. She's also very detail oriented. She knows nothing of our finances, but she does know we have wills and where to find them. In our will book is all the information she would need (accounts, locations of assets, etc).

When my son was the executor of his late father's small estate, some hard feelings developed between the siblings. He felt they didn't help very much - they felt he took too long to dispose of everything... So I decided not to name either one of them...SIL is about 15 years younger than me.

[Deleted]

My Aunt named her brother executor. She didn't have any children. He didn't know much about the estate, even though she survived years after being told she was terminal. It was a bit of a scavenger hunt to figure things out, but it was possible.

We have my dad as executor. Our kids aren't old enough to handle it. We have a list of where we have accounts, but he doesn't know the amounts.

[Urban Chicago]

A lot of people use their lawyer. Our kids are too young, so we have DH's brother as the executor (he's also an attorney).

[Pants]

My parents asked me if I could be executor, and due to some long-standing sibling issues with my brother I declined. They have chosen a lawyer who will execute the estate.

[cronewitch]

My mom is mine but she won't do it so my brother would be stuck with it. When I remake my will I might ask my nephew to be executor. I don't have much estate just the house and vehicles all financial accounts have beneficiaries.

[motherto2]

My mom is my executor. even though my daughter was almost 18 when my ex and I split, I decided not to put that burden on her in case something happened. I knew tha my kids would go to live with their father, but my mother controlled what was necessary for their care. That way everyone was kept honest . My kids are both older now (18 and almost 22) but I think it's for the best that I leave my mother for now. She knows what I have, and it would be easier for her to navigate all of the legal mumbo jumbo.

[cronewitch]

I plan to leave my estate a flash drive with a list of all websites and passwords and inventory of what to look for.

When you go paperless on things like brokerage accounts it makes it hard to find them when you are gone.

[TheOtherMe]

Mar 9, 2011 19:43:50 GMT -5 cronewitch said:

I plan to leave my estate a flash drive with a list of all websites and passwords and inventory of what to look for.

When you go paperless on things like brokerage accounts it makes it hard to find them when you are gone.

Doing something very similar. My financial life is online and I'm single. My executor needs to know how to access things.

[kittycat]

If you are named the executor of an estate and you don't want to do it, do you just turn it down and let the court set one?

[Deleted]

I think so, KittyCat. What a lot of people are overlooking, though, is that the executor gets "paid" by the estate . . . usually a percentage. Most small estates can't afford to give $$$ away.

[Bluerobin]

The bride and I have no kids. We keep a list of assets available for the executor. When one of us goes, the other will make sure the list is absolutely current and in the Executor's hands.

[Deleted]

DH and I don't have children and I absolutely didn't want my brother to be the Executor and Trustee of our Trust. DH is an only child. So our long time friend and attorney is our Trustee. The only problem is that we are all pretty close in age so at some point (maybe when we're in our late 70s early 80s) we'll have to change. But he's has always stayed in good shape so I wouldn't be at all surprised if he out lives us both!

Note to Kitty Cat: you must write a note stating that you "decline" the executorship/Trustee. The process varies from state to state.

[8 Bit WWBG]

...:::"When you go paperless on things like brokerage accounts it makes it hard to find them when you are gone.":::...

In your time on this earth, it must have been interesting to see the evolution of technology like this. My great grandmother didn't quite survive to see the flash drive or the HDTV, but she was born in 1899, so she saw a lot of interesting things over the years.