Adventures as an employee - stories of bosses, co-workers

[Opti]

On another thread someone brought up the amazing website notalwaysright.com (or something like that.) I haven't found anything yet on line nearly as amusing or well-written that concerns stories about bosses and even co-workers.

I figured I'd start one here hopefully to be on-going and a collection we can all use to vent and amuse ourselves. So please share your stories and I plan to share some of mine.

[Opti]

My current employer has a scattered way of job posting and filling positions. Some rarely get posted like nursing jobs and others find their way to the internet in various places. Our corporate company website does have a place to post jobs for each facility, however, I have discovered multiple times only some jobs are posted and others become one offs if posted.

Recently I decided I'd check what was posted on the corporate website. I found myself laughing and amused. We finally posted a nursing job and we also posted a high level job that until I read the website I thought was occupied.  I'll just say some people are going to be awfully surprised if they look. The job ad prominently displays the fact it is for our new construction that is not complete with the official finish date of May 30.

I am conflicted. I like current job holder and wonder if this person has given notice or whether other interesting things are afoot. Perhaps it will be like the reception job where a job description appeared for FT with all these glorious opportunities listed the FTer does not even get. I remember my boss assuring me there was a mistake and she really was looking for a PTer to fill the weekend hours. Amuse me once, amuse me twice?

[Lizard Queen]

My company didn't even give anyone notice that they were hiring people for newly created positions the year that I quit.  On the one hand, I was frustrated by that because I had been a loyal employee for 14 years.  On the other hand, I figured I didn't have the right degree for them to see that I was qualified for either job.  I could have done either one, with the same amount  of training (but slightly different training) as the newbies got.  Unfortunately, that meant that they would also have to train a replacement for me.  I was stuck in my position, and that was the main reason I left to go back to school and get the "right" degree.  I don't know if that was the right decision, to be honest.  It has cost me a lot monetarily, but it felt good to do something proactively vs. fretting over what I had little to no control over.  Having the right degree now is at least opening up a lot more job possibilities, so at least that's a plus.

[chiver78]

I completely forgot about that website. thanks for the laughs this morning!

[lynnerself]

When we changed administrators, at least 2 people found out they were being demoted when their positions were posted on line.

[giramomma]

I don't even know where to start.

I'm frankly shocked at how poor the level of "leadership" is within our "leadership team."

I'm still mostly amused that my co-workers have been compared to ISIS. I'm sure that will be topped, somehow.

[Artemis Windsong]

Where my late DM worked, they hired office staff from a company that was relocating the upper management to other locations.  They were brought in at or above the same pay as the people working there.

Payback to the company was intentional reduced productivity of the loyal employees.

[Artemis Windsong]

Where my late DDad worked they had sales contests with trips as the prize.  He had won one then had won another the next year.  Ooops change of rules.  Cannot win twice so they gave the trip to another guy.  He was heartbroken.

I don't what kind of reward abused employees deserve but they deserve something.

[tskeeter]

Apr 27, 2015 11:19:20 GMT -5 Artemis Windsong said:

Where my late DDad worked they had sales contests with trips as the prize.  He had won one then had won another the next year.  Ooops change of rules.  Cannot win twice so they gave the trip to another guy.  He was heartbroken.

I don't what kind of reward abused employees deserve but they deserve something.

I'm always amazed at how effectively businesses turn incentives into dis-incentives.

Worked on a system implementation project.  While still doing my regular job.  (The others working on the implementation were relieved of at least part of their normal job duties during the preparation and implementation.)  And covering some of my bosses job because he was devoting so much time to the implementation that he wasn't responding to inquiries.  So the inquires he would normally handle were coming to me.  All of the folks who worked on the system implementation got bonuses for their efforts.  Except my boss and me.  The justification was that the bonus opportunity for our base job was a higher percentage than the other folks on the project, so our contribution to the project would be recognized in the normal bonus process.  Come bonus time, we both get about half our target bonus percentage.  Because a large part of our bonuses are tied to group performance, instead of just to our location's performance (which was outstanding), and another business unit in our group had sucked swamp water all year, draggin down the group performance rating.  The others who worked on the system implementation?  Their bonuses were tied to location performance.  They got more than 100% of their target bonuses.  So, most of the folks who worked on the implementation got an implementation bonus plus more than 100% of their regular bonus.  While my boss and I, the two people who had put more effort into the implementation than anyone else, and who's functions had the smoothest implmentations, received reduced bonuses and no implementatin bonus.  Somehow, that didn't leave me feeling very motivated.       

[Tennesseer]

Apr 27, 2015 11:19:20 GMT -5 Artemis Windsong said:

Where my late DDad worked they had sales contests with trips as the prize.  He had won one then had won another the next year.  Ooops change of rules.  Cannot win twice so they gave the trip to another guy.  He was heartbroken.

I don't what kind of reward abused employees deserve but they deserve something.

Years ago, my employer's sales department took the highest grossing sales reps and their spouses on a group trip to Hawaii as an award. Some of the sales reps wanted another free trip because while they were in Hawaii, a Pacific ocean hurricane struck the island they were on and they misses a day or two of sun bathing.

They did not get a rain check extra trip.

[joemilitary]

employee A about 40% of the time doesn't answer his phone. Boss pretty much knows this.

Then boss tries to call employee A, employee A doesn't pick up, Boss goes over to where employee A is (about 2 offices down) and sure enough sees employee A sitting there.  Instead of talking to employee A about the problem, the boss proceeds to complain behind employee A's back  to the rest of us about employee A not answering the phone ....and never addresses employee A. 

Boss is surprised employee A still doesn't answer the phone about 40% of the time....

[MJ2.0]

Apr 27, 2015 10:19:27 GMT -5 giramomma said:

I don't even know where to start.

I'm frankly shocked at how poor the level of "leadership" is within our "leadership team."

I'm still mostly amused that my co-workers have been compared to ISIS. I'm sure that will be topped, somehow.

Archer ISIS? Or the beheading ISIS?

[Lizard Queen]

Apr 27, 2015 12:12:00 GMT -5 tskeeter said:

Apr 27, 2015 11:19:20 GMT -5 Artemis Windsong said:

Where my late DDad worked they had sales contests with trips as the prize.  He had won one then had won another the next year.  Ooops change of rules.  Cannot win twice so they gave the trip to another guy.  He was heartbroken.

I don't what kind of reward abused employees deserve but they deserve something.

I'm always amazed at how effectively businesses turn incentives into dis-incentives.

Worked on a system implementation project.  While still doing my regular job.  (The others working on the implementation were relieved of at least part of their normal job duties during the preparation and implementation.)  And covering some of my bosses job because he was devoting so much time to the implementation that he wasn't responding to inquiries.  So the inquires he would normally handle were coming to me.  All of the folks who worked on the system implementation got bonuses for their efforts.  Except my boss and me.  The justification was that the bonus opportunity for our base job was a higher percentage than the other folks on the project, so our contribution to the project would be recognized in the normal bonus process.  Come bonus time, we both get about half our target bonus percentage.  Because a large part of our bonuses are tied to group performance, instead of just to our location's performance (which was outstanding), and another business unit in our group had sucked swamp water all year, draggin down the group performance rating.  The others who worked on the system implementation?  Their bonuses were tied to location performance.  They got more than 100% of their target bonuses.  So, most of the folks who worked on the implementation got an implementation bonus plus more than 100% of their regular bonus.  While my boss and I, the two people who had put more effort into the implementation than anyone else, and who's functions had the smoothest implmentations, received reduced bonuses and no implementatin bonus.  Somehow, that didn't leave me feeling very motivated.       

Ugh! I'm angry FOR you.  WTF??

[Wisconsin Beth]

beheading ISIS. 

[973beachbum]

My PT job is actually more stressful than my full time job.  We are a shore area so we get extra help in the summer.  My vision when they said that was retirees or SaHM's who needed a few extra bucks being hired to work 12-15 hours a week along with some college kids home for the summer.  Man was I wrong and really wrong!

The new crop of summer hires are mostly either pretty young HS kids or adults in the 23-27 year olds who have never had a job.  And I seriously mean that.  We have 4 new people over the age of 23 that have literally never held even a PT job.

Most of those they kindly gave to the front end, as clearly we have so much more time to babysit.   I am not even sure that all of them don't have "issues" of some kind maybe even a low IQ.  It is not that I don't want to be nice and help them.  I do have kids so I do feel more like a mom, but I really don't have time to ferret out what their problems are and find a way to work around them during the dinner rush.    

One of them was so slow to respond when he first started I actually thought he was mentally handicapped.  He hasn't said yet what issues he has, but he does this thing where he turns to stone.  He will be at the end of the register and suddenly we will realize he isn't moving.  The worst part is it happens most when we are busy.  It is about the worst time as people want to get their groceries and go not try and figure out why their is an employee at the register who isn't bagging their groceries and isn't moving so someone else can.

One of the others shows up at least 15 minutes late ever shift.  Then has the to go to the bathroom every hour for 15 minutes. 

I swear it would be funny if it wasn't real.  And for those that read the other thread, yes that store also has a 6 page online application.

[Opti]

One of the others shows up at least 15 minutes late ever shift. Then has the to go to the bathroom every hour for 15 minutes.

I swear it would be funny if it wasn't real. And for those that read the other thread, yes that store also has a 6 page online application.

I'm sure it is a grand adventure.  I work with CNAs that generally show up late as well, so I know what you mean.

My guess with your freeze guy is his response to stress is to freeze. Retail is probably a bad choice for him

work wise.

[MJ2.0]

Apr 27, 2015 13:17:20 GMT -5 Opti said:

One of the others shows up at least 15 minutes late ever shift. Then has the to go to the bathroom every hour for 15 minutes.

I swear it would be funny if it wasn't real. And for those that read the other thread, yes that store also has a 6 page online application.

I'm sure it is a grand adventure.  I work with CNAs that generally show up late as well, so I know what you mean.

My guess with your freeze guy is his response to stress is to freeze. Retail is probably a bad choice for him

work wise.

as well as anything in the emergency or medical fields. Or education. Or basically anything that involves interfacing with a human being.  Or an animal.

[NancysSummerSip]

A gal I used to work with took at least three smoke breaks an hour and left her cellphone on her desk (ringtone turned up all the way) every time she went outside. She actually said out loud that she expected one of us who did not go out for a smoke break to answer her nasty, stinky phone for her.  I told her in no uncertain terms which orifice I thought that phone would fit in perfectly. She was fired eventually for taking unapproved sick time.

As for my current office manager (aka The Hag): inappropriate language to clients and the boss, cutting off and butting into conversations where she's not wanted or needed, general bullying behavior when she wants something, whining and sulking when she does not get it, regular calls from her bank letting her know her account is overdrawn, a sibling who does not want to talk to her anymore "for some strange reason"...just your average garden-variety train wreck.

[joemilitary]

working as a mechanic I one time asked my co-worker to "put a new mirror on a truck in the bay" (to replace the broken one)

5 minutes late he returns "all done"

an hour later I happen to walk through the bay, the broken mirror is still installed on the truck.  I walk around to the front and see the new mirror laying on the hood of the truck uninstalled.

I ask the co-worker about it, he says "you said to put it "on the truck", it is "on the truck""...........

[ArchietheDragon]

Apr 27, 2015 14:31:56 GMT -5 joemilitary said:

working as a mechanic I one time asked my co-worker to "put a new mirror on a truck in the bay" (to replace the broken one)

5 minutes late he returns "all done"

an hour later I happen to walk through the bay, the broken mirror is still installed on the truck.  I walk around to the front and see the new mirror laying on the hood of the truck uninstalled.

I ask the co-worker about it, he says "you said to put it "on the truck", it is "on the truck""...........

You have just proved every wife right. 

[giramomma]

Apr 27, 2015 12:19:47 GMT -5 MJ2.0 said:

Apr 27, 2015 10:19:27 GMT -5 giramomma said:

I don't even know where to start.

I'm frankly shocked at how poor the level of "leadership" is within our "leadership team."

I'm still mostly amused that my co-workers have been compared to ISIS. I'm sure that will be topped, somehow.

Archer ISIS? Or the beheading ISIS?

Beheading.  I'm in an environment where public sector workers are worse than folks on assistance.

[Opti]

Apr 27, 2015 13:33:44 GMT -5 MJ2.0 said:

Apr 27, 2015 13:17:20 GMT -5 Opti said:

I'm sure it is a grand adventure.  I work with CNAs that generally show up late as well, so I know what you mean.

My guess with your freeze guy is his response to stress is to freeze. Retail is probably a bad choice for him

work wise.

as well as anything in the emergency or medical fields. Or education. Or basically anything that involves interfacing with a human being.  Or an animal.

Yes he'd probably be better suited to something like garbage man or those people who sort recycling.

Something where work pace is more steady and he's not expected to be a cheerful interface with people.

As a plus he'll be less likely to be picked off by bears or snipers especially if he's in a group of those who

run when panicked.

[andi9899]

I worked at a pizza place in high school with a man who was mentally handicapped. Fine. What was not fine was that the guy smelled awful. He must have never bathed because I don't remember there ever being a day where he didn't smell. And he worked around food!

[lynnerself]

My coworkers are all fine people and do an OK job. But the range of personalities is unbelievable.

Mr. Grumpy is 65, knows everything , HATES to be corrected and is often surly.

Ms Needy always needs reassurance that her work is right (even tho she really does know this stuff), gets emotional over everything and takes slight at anything.

Ms Scattered does not handle stress well, can't multitask and gets distracted easily. And gets worse when she has personal issues (which is frequest)'

Mr Laid-back (the newest guy) seems OK, but doesn't seem too ambitious, doesn't follow though or seem  too concerned when he make mistakes.

Or maybe these are all fine people and I am just tired of working. They do manage to get the job done every day, on time and with few mistakes.
So glad I am out of here in 2 months.

[milee]

When I started with one of the Big Six - yes, that's dating me, it's now the Big Four - accounting firms, the partners and senior managers were pretty much allowed to do whatever they wanted as long as they were making money for the firm. Oh, and as long as they were men.

Examples:

One senior manager (a level below partner) had a serious temper and would lose it when he was unhappy.  Most of the time he'd just turn bright red, swear a lot and be nasty, but if he was very stressed his level of control would be virtually nonexistent.  I was on an assignment with him when he got a call that upset him and he flung a chair across the room.  Luckily he really liked me so it wasn't hurled in my direction, I just happened to be there.  For the unfortunate people he didn't like - mainly people who were slow or made mistakes - he was unrelentingly awful.  He'd belittle them and be snide about their shortcomings in front of others.  Sometimes he'd play it off as a joke, but most times he'd just be flat out nasty.  One of my best friends was in a room with him once when he got frustrated with this guy who was OK but known to be a slow worker and who'd just made a major error.  The senior manager not only yelled at him, but threw a stapler across the table at him.    My friend actually cried when she told me about it, she was so traumatized.  The guy that the sr. manager threw the stapler at left the firm within a few months.  The senior manager made partner 6 months later.

Another senior manager was newly divorced and hitting on the female staff.  Very uncomfortable and totally inappropriate since we were all completely dependent on his review and speaking for us at the promotion and raise meetings in order for us to be promoted or get raises.  Beyond awkward.  He really liked one of my other friends.  She was not only not interested, she was Mormon and totally appalled by his gross advances.  He'd wait until late when others had left but she was still working and then try to walk her to her car.  Once, he even left hand drawn pornography on her desk... and the characters looked like himself and her.  Ick.  She talked to HR repeatedly and even gave them the copies of the porn.  They "talked" to him.    Of course, at the next review meeting, she wasn't promoted for the position she had been up for and didn't receive a raise.  He made partner.  She left a few months later.

Oh, and both of these senior managers I'm describing had about the same amount of time in at the firm as did the only female senior manager at the time.  There were no female partners and she was the highest level woman in the region.  She also was personally responsible for 20% of the business in her division - a huge amount considering the size of the firm.  But she didn't make partner for two years after these two guys did, because the partners were concerned she was too much of a bitch and that her tough attitude wouldn't "fit in."  She actually was kind of a bitch, but no more so than any of the men and she was one of those tough but fair types. 

[Deleted]

Apr 27, 2015 10:10:47 GMT -5 lynnerself said:

When we changed administrators, at least 2 people found out they were being demoted when their positions were posted on line.

That is horrible!

[tskeeter]

Apr 27, 2015 16:52:17 GMT -5 milee said:

When I started with one of the Big Six - yes, that's dating me, it's now the Big Four - accounting firms, the partners and senior managers were pretty much allowed to do whatever they wanted as long as they were making money for the firm. Oh, and as long as they were men.

Examples:

One senior manager (a level below partner) had a serious temper and would lose it when he was unhappy.  Most of the time he'd just turn bright red, swear a lot and be nasty, but if he was very stressed his level of control would be virtually nonexistent.  I was on an assignment with him when he got a call that upset him and he flung a chair across the room.  Luckily he really liked me so it wasn't hurled in my direction, I just happened to be there.  For the unfortunate people he didn't like - mainly people who were slow or made mistakes - he was unrelentingly awful.  He'd belittle them and be snide about their shortcomings in front of others.  Sometimes he'd play it off as a joke, but most times he'd just be flat out nasty.  One of my best friends was in a room with him once when he got frustrated with this guy who was OK but known to be a slow worker and who'd just made a major error.  The senior manager not only yelled at him, but threw a stapler across the table at him.    My friend actually cried when she told me about it, she was so traumatized.  The guy that the sr. manager threw the stapler at left the firm within a few months.  The senior manager made partner 6 months later.

Another senior manager was newly divorced and hitting on the female staff.  Very uncomfortable and totally inappropriate since we were all completely dependent on his review and speaking for us at the promotion and raise meetings in order for us to be promoted or get raises.  Beyond awkward.  He really liked one of my other friends.  She was not only not interested, she was Mormon and totally appalled by his gross advances.  He'd wait until late when others had left but she was still working and then try to walk her to her car.  Once, he even left hand drawn pornography on her desk... and the characters looked like himself and her.  Ick.  She talked to HR repeatedly and even gave them the copies of the porn.  They "talked" to him.    Of course, at the next review meeting, she wasn't promoted for the position she had been up for and didn't receive a raise.  He made partner.  She left a few months later.

Oh, and both of these senior managers I'm describing had about the same amount of time in at the firm as did the only female senior manager at the time.  There were no female partners and she was the highest level woman in the region.  She also was personally responsible for 20% of the business in her division - a huge amount considering the size of the firm.  But she didn't make partner for two years after these two guys did, because the partners were concerned she was too much of a bitch and that her tough attitude wouldn't "fit in."  She actually was kind of a bitch, but no more so than any of the men and she was one of those tough but fair types. 

Your first example sounds like the guy I worked for when I was just out of school.  Turns out that he'd been the local hachet man for his firm.  They put auditors who needed to leave, but weren't leaving on their own, on his jobs.  Brow beat them until they left.   He was so bad that the rumor mill said that one of his clients had told the firm that if he was back on their engagment, they would have new auditors.  Thankfully, I only worked for him for about six months before he got a job in a different department.

[Artemis Windsong]

Apr 27, 2015 12:12:00 GMT -5 tskeeter said:

Apr 27, 2015 11:19:20 GMT -5 Artemis Windsong said:

Where my late DDad worked they had sales contests with trips as the prize.  He had won one then had won another the next year.  Ooops change of rules.  Cannot win twice so they gave the trip to another guy.  He was heartbroken.

I don't what kind of reward abused employees deserve but they deserve something.

I'm always amazed at how effectively businesses turn incentives into dis-incentives.

Worked on a system implementation project.  While still doing my regular job.  (The others working on the implementation were relieved of at least part of their normal job duties during the preparation and implementation.)  And covering some of my bosses job because he was devoting so much time to the implementation that he wasn't responding to inquiries.  So the inquires he would normally handle were coming to me.  All of the folks who worked on the system implementation got bonuses for their efforts.  Except my boss and me.  The justification was that the bonus opportunity for our base job was a higher percentage than the other folks on the project, so our contribution to the project would be recognized in the normal bonus process.  Come bonus time, we both get about half our target bonus percentage.  Because a large part of our bonuses are tied to group performance, instead of just to our location's performance (which was outstanding), and another business unit in our group had sucked swamp water all year, draggin down the group performance rating.  The others who worked on the system implementation?  Their bonuses were tied to location performance.  They got more than 100% of their target bonuses.  So, most of the folks who worked on the implementation got an implementation bonus plus more than 100% of their regular bonus.  While my boss and I, the two people who had put more effort into the implementation than anyone else, and who's functions had the smoothest implmentations, received reduced bonuses and no implementatin bonus.  Somehow, that didn't leave me feeling very motivated.       

May the karma of the universe repay your getting gypped.

[Artemis Windsong]

I applied for the job that I was working in.  The application was caught by the interviewers secretary and returned to me.  It was a hostile take over situation.

[The Walk of the Penguin Mich]

UGH!  Where to start.....

When I first started at the university, I had to go through this HUGE course on customer service that was supposed to be attended by everyone who worked at the medical center.  It wasn't until I was incarcerated  admitted into the hospital (which IS a part of the medical center) that I realized that doctors, residents, interns and nurses were exempt.  My sentence there was nothing short of a nightmare, and much of it due to absolutely lousy customer service.

For instance, I was supposed to receive pain meds every 3 hours around the clock and pain would wake me up about 30 min before the 3 hours, so I'd call for meds.  Sometimes it would show up in 30 min, but it was more like 2 hours before my meds arrived.  If it was 2 hours, my pain ratcheted up such that my normal dose was not sufficient to keep it back and they'd need to give me a bolus of morphine.  One nurse told me that I was just seeking drugs, and that I needed to look into a detox program.  If they had delivered my drugs in time, I would not have needed the extra dose!

A resident came into my room to tell me I had MRSA.  He was soooo proud of himself, but he didn't know I was a microbiologist and had gotten a copy of my c/s of my infection.  I told him he was a flat out liar and he got pissed at me and asked me how I knew.  I told him that if I had MRSA, he would not have been walking into my room in a lab coat and scrubs, but would have on a gown, mask and booties to keep from transmitting my infection.  I also dropped that I was a registered microbiologist and knew EXACTLY what my infection was and could probably tell him more about it than what he knew.  It made him look like an ass to his fellow residents.  That was fun.

Phlebotomy came in to draw blood for testing.  However, my IV had blown out my decent veins and I was all bruised up from my arms to hands to feet (yes, they stuck my feet....that HURTS) to get another IV line in.  I wound up getting a PICC line installed.  Now, nurses are the only ones allowed to draw blood from PICC lines (oh, I can too), but the phlebotomist refused to go get a nurse and insisted on sticking my blown out veins 3x unsuccessfully before she finally went to get the nurse.  I looked like a drug addict, my arms were a mess.

However, the grand finale was when I broke out AMA to come out to WA.  I was deliberately waiting for my last dose of antibiotics I was supposed to be receiving that day, and not only did my nurse disappear, she was 3 hours late in giving me my drugs (yes, including pain meds too).  When she finally got there, she told me that since I was leaving AMA, that my insurance company would not pay my bill (yes, I called and checked this out) and that the university would send me to collections, because I obviously could not pay my bill.

Those are just a few of the 'highlights' of the fabulous customer service that my employer ascribes to.   I really, REALLY wish that I had had the foresight to start writing all the crap that happened down, with names.  But I was so freaking sick that it was all I could do to make sure that I got the things that I needed.