Spin-off baby shower thread

[techguy]

Apr 21, 2015 13:06:14 GMT -5 Shooby said:

What is wrong with giving gifts to people? I think learning how to give and receive a gift is an important life lesson.

Nothing wrong, but some people will then call the event a "gift grab".  Can't win.

[cronewitch]

Apr 21, 2015 12:55:14 GMT -5 Shooby said:

Apr 21, 2015 12:13:35 GMT -5 giramomma said:

We barely had room for kids in our house. Seriously, DD1 had to sleep in a playpen in the living room, because there was no other place for her.

We didn't have room to get a bunch of kid toys, either. If you include friend birthday parties, it easily could have gotten close to 50-75 new toys in our house between two kids in one year.

Yeah, no.

And, so far, my DS has not complained about being robbed because he didn't get 15-20 birthday presents from friends when he was 4.

I said on my other thread, the norm in my parts is to spend $20-25 on gifts for kids birthday parties.  That's one huge latte!

If you plan, like a GOOD Ymer, you can would already have purchased some gifts on clearance far in advance. 

Mom always had extra birthday gifts in her bedroom for the times we waited until the last minute to tell her there was a birthday party. When I was young birthday gifts from child to child were not expensive but kids only got toys on birthdays and Christmas so anything was welcome. Getting gifts and giving gifts is part of growing up. Letting the child chose what to give a friend might help them be more generous and thoughtful. Now kids get too many toys so as an old woman I give them money, I figure a check for a first birthday can help them start to save for a first car where a plastic toy is clutter.

[chen35]

I wonder if some of the differences in opinion have anything to do with the 'love languages' of the people involved. My mother is a total gifts person. To her, that someone put thought into picking a gift out for her means everything. I know if I want to make her happy I should pick her up a little something.

I'm the exact opposite. While I think the thought of gifts is nice, and I don't turn them down or anything, it doesn't necessarily make me feel loved when someone gets me a gift. 


That is my cheesy thought for the day!

[chalupabatman]

We are having a small birthday party for my daughter next month, she will be four.  This is the first year that we are inviting friends.   I am dreading the gift part, I did not mention anything on the invitations.  The dreaded "I have this" or her tossing her clothes aside to play with the toys makes me really anxious. I have been talking to her about appreciating every gift she receives, and that gifts are not required. Do you guys have any other tips on how to prepare her?


* I hate social type settings, even events for my children.  I get really worked up and uncomfortable.  She is such a sweet kid and really had her heart set on her friends coming to her party.

[Chocolate Lover]

Apr 21, 2015 15:00:13 GMT -5 chen35 said:

I wonder if some of the differences in opinion have anything to do with the 'love languages' of the people involved. My mother is a total gifts person. To her, that someone put thought into picking a gift out for her means everything. I know if I want to make her happy I should pick her up a little something.

I'm the exact opposite. While I think the thought of gifts is nice, and I don't turn them down or anything, it doesn't necessarily make me feel loved when someone gets me a gift. 


That is my cheesy thought for the day!

I'm very Sheldon Cooper about gifts, I get something and I think I must reciprocate something of similar value.  I've tried to be better about just appreciating the gift but sometimes, if I dwell on it, it gives me fits to know I can't do the same for the people who gave me a gift. (They - my sisters mostly - have more disposable income than me and they're generous people.) 

[Formerly SK]

Last summer when was DS was DD, we had kids bring dog/cat food in lieu of presents to his bday party.  We knew he'd get a bunch of generic girl stuff and he'd hate it.  Since he's a HUGE animal lover, we collected animal food and gave it to the local Humane Society.  I thought it was a great idea, DS was thrilled, and people were able to bring anything from a can of something to a 20lb bag (or nothing at all).  

[chen35]

I love that idea!

[Spellbound454]

Books or sweets usually. Never anything expensive for a child's party.

There were so many parties....and there was a sort of unwritten rule between us about the sorts of things to bring.

An hour and an 45 mins.....Party bag for guests to go home with, with cake, crayons, bubbles, party bag toy and sweets

[Tennesseer]

Pet food (Formerly SK) and funny birthday cards only.

[yogiii]

Apr 21, 2015 15:11:38 GMT -5 Chocolate Lover said:

Apr 21, 2015 15:00:13 GMT -5 chen35 said:

I wonder if some of the differences in opinion have anything to do with the 'love languages' of the people involved. My mother is a total gifts person. To her, that someone put thought into picking a gift out for her means everything. I know if I want to make her happy I should pick her up a little something.

I'm the exact opposite. While I think the thought of gifts is nice, and I don't turn them down or anything, it doesn't necessarily make me feel loved when someone gets me a gift. 


That is my cheesy thought for the day!

I'm very Sheldon Cooper about gifts, I get something and I think I must reciprocate something of similar value.  I've tried to be better about just appreciating the gift but sometimes, if I dwell on it, it gives me fits to know I can't do the same for the people who gave me a gift. (They - my sisters mostly - have more disposable income than me and they're generous people.) 

I totally thought of you last night. We got a gift card in the mail from some friends, they gave it to us as a thank you for some hand-me-downs. It's just stuff I would have otherwise given to Goodwill but they have a DD a year younger than ours and we had some items that were only worn 1-2 times (and cute!). The gc is probably about the same value as the clothes. I feel totally awful they gave this to us and now I'm trying to find some way to reciprocate but realized we must both be Sheldons and I need to break the cycle!

[Chocolate Lover]

Apr 23, 2015 9:18:22 GMT -5 yogiii said:

Apr 21, 2015 15:11:38 GMT -5 Chocolate Lover said:

I'm very Sheldon Cooper about gifts, I get something and I think I must reciprocate something of similar value.  I've tried to be better about just appreciating the gift but sometimes, if I dwell on it, it gives me fits to know I can't do the same for the people who gave me a gift. (They - my sisters mostly - have more disposable income than me and they're generous people.) 

I totally thought of you last night. We got a gift card in the mail from some friends, they gave it to us as a thank you for some hand-me-downs. It's just stuff I would have otherwise given to Goodwill but they have a DD a year younger than ours and we had some items that were only worn 1-2 times (and cute!). The gc is probably about the same value as the clothes. I feel totally awful they gave this to us and now I'm trying to find some way to reciprocate but realized we must both be Sheldons and I need to break the cycle!

 I sooo feel your pain! I'm getting better about being a gracious gift accepter, mostly because I have to be in some instances.

ETA: sounds like your friend is a bit Sheldon too!