Managing survivor death benefits

[twinmami30]

Posted this on the other money board but hoping that someone will answer in either board:


I will now be receiving survivor death benefits for my two sons due to their dad passing. I am a bit confused on how to manage this money. I will get the same amount for each of them in separate deposits monthly. I was given the choice of opening up bank accounts for them or getting a debit card (2 cards). Not sure which will work best. Budgeting and automating my bills is still an area where I find challenging so the easier I make the process the better. I will need to use most of the money for bills and things the boys will need since it is replacing child support and some I will save. If I get bank accounts it will have to be two of them and transfering funds will be easy if I can link to my own accounts online but I am worried it will be more difficult to track expenses for the end of the year when I have to explain how their funds were spent. If I get debit cards I can pay bills with the card but only allowed one free atm withdrawal a month or have to go to the bank teller to swipe card. That too may be hard to track.

Is anyone familiar with receiving survivor death benefits for children? I guess I am just stressed with mourning, faking a smile and also worried about the future. I want to make sure that I will be able to provide for the children and also not break any rules when I am itemizing the expenses (if that's what it is)

[Sam_2.0]

I am so so sorry for the passing of their dad no other advice, but huge hugs to you. ♡

[bobosensei]

Why do you have to explain how the funds were spent?  My dad died when I was 14 (this was about 20 years ago now), and while I knew mom got money from SS for her youngest 3 kids she spent it as needed for us and never had to tell anyone how she spent it.  Did that change or do you mean you are going to tell the kids?  It isn't their money, and while it is great if you don't need it all and can save some for their future make sure you are saving for your retirement and taking care of yourself too.  I know mom didn't have to have a separate bank account for every check she got from SS while I never saw her bank statement this was before online banking so I would have remembered if she had to go to the bank all the time to shuffle money.

Sorry for your loss.

[taz157]

Feb 15, 2015 23:20:35 GMT -5 Sam_2.0 said:

I am so so sorry for the passing of their dad no other advice, but huge hugs to you. ♡

Yeah that.

[Deleted]

Feb 16, 2015 2:42:02 GMT -5 bobosensei said:

Why do you have to explain how the funds were spent?  My dad died when I was 14 (this was about 20 years ago now), and while I knew mom got money from SS for her youngest 3 kids she spent it as needed for us and never had to tell anyone how she spent it.  Did that change or do you mean you are going to tell the kids?  It isn't their money, and while it is great if you don't need it all and can save some for their future make sure you are saving for your retirement and taking care of yourself too.  I know mom didn't have to have a separate bank account for every check she got from SS while I never saw her bank statement this was before online banking so I would have remembered if she had to go to the bank all the time to shuffle money.

Sorry for your loss.

I don't know if the change is recent or your Mom just wasn't doing it, but you're supposed to report on it annually.  I've heard it's a pretty high level report so not nit-picky on every detail, but you have to show it's going towards the needs of the child and anything extra has to be put in a savings account for the child. 

To answer the question  I would think Quicken or YNAB would work well for categorizing expenses and running reports.   I don't know what the "rules" are, but I'm guessing you can take housing and food expenses and just divide by 3 for you all to determine how much you spent on each.  It's not like you have to divide up the groceries between Son #1 and Son #2. 

I think what they're mostly trying to prevent is a parent taking the money to the casino or going on expensive vacations on the kids dime.

[The Captain]

twinmama85 - I am sorry for your loss, but it sounds like you're pulling together well - so just breath - you will be fine.

I know @workingshasta has some experience in this area and she's been very frank about the complexities of navigating governmental systems.  Perhaps she'll be able to chime in and offer some advice.

[murphath]

Oh, my goodness...Is this the same twinmom from the Grocery Challenge thread who used to post a few years back? I am so sorry for your loss. You've certainly been through some trying times.

I would just open a separate checking account for the SS checks and pay for the kids' things from there. The info from the check register can be transferred to a spreadsheet for ease in reporting back to SS.

[t-dog]

I have been receiving survivors benefits from social security for my son since his dad passed 5 years ago.  I set up the direct deposit which occurs the third Wed of every month.  Every year I have to submit the representative payee statement (takes 5min)  and return by mail stating how much was saved for boy and how much spent on his support.  

[t-dog]

Feel free to pm me if you have questions.