How I continue to suck at social situations..

[Deleted]

I really was too tired and shouldn't have gone to the mom's Christmas Party last night. Not that I didn't have fun talking to other people but oh man, I have such a hard time not showing my impatience with games where I pass a present right and left for 10 minutes and it ends in one space down from where it starts and then we have to open them one person at a time so we can all see... Etc.

Am I the only one? 

Sigh. 

[Shooby]

Drink more egg nog!

[Deleted]

There was no alcohol  it was at a country buffet where I paid 20$ to eat the six things that weren't breaded, doused in gravy or otherwise full of gluten. 

See, i'm just an irritable party pooper. 

I think I just tend to blurt when I'm tired.  Still haven't mastered shut up and smile.

[Cookies Galore]

That sounds like a dreadful evening. Shitty food and a shitty gift game? Ugh.

[resolution]

Some people need that type of game to break the ice in a room of strangers. Not sure why anyone planned it at a family event though.

[Shooby]

Just try to get into the spirit of things and be frivolous. Or, if not, then just find something edible and get it over with!

[thyme4change]

Our company party does these games.  Not even the ones that plan the games volunteer to participate.  It is so pathetic when the guy up front is like "I need 5 more people, 5 more...anyone, anyone...5 people.  Still need 5 people."  You would think after the 6th year of people not jumping up to play the same dumb-ass game over and over the planning committee would give up on it.

Other divisions go out to a restaurant and drink wine.  We stay on-site and see who can draw the best picture of a Christmas tree.  

[Deleted]

The games are just something to do with your hands while you're talking. And you say gravy and deep fried likes it a bad thing

[Shooby]

I don't go to company parties very often anymore. I am over it.

[Wisconsin Beth]

Dec 19, 2014 8:25:09 GMT -5 laterbloomer said:

The games are just something to do with your hands while you're talking. And you say gravy and deep fried likes it a bad thing

I can't speak for oped but for my DH, it is a bad thing as he's gluten free.  Gravy usually has gluten in it.  If they don't have a dedicated fryer for gluten free foods, you get cross contamination.    We'd rather DH not spend the next few hours to a day recovering from eating gluten. 

Holidays are hard.  We're going to his Mom's for Christmas breakfast and have to bring food for him to eat.  She's flat out said she's not making something separate for him.  In her defense, she usually does try to make something for DH but dinner is so much easier than breakfast, esp. since DH has dairy issues too.  So no gluten, no cheese and no milk makes breakfast more challenging. 

[milee]

Dec 19, 2014 7:57:22 GMT -5 thyme4change said:

Our company party does these games.  Not even the ones that plan the games volunteer to participate.  It is so pathetic when the guy up front is like "I need 5 more people, 5 more...anyone, anyone...5 people.  Still need 5 people."  You would think after the 6th year of people not jumping up to play the same dumb-ass game over and over the planning committee would give up on it.

Other divisions go out to a restaurant and drink wine.  We stay on-site and see who can draw the best picture of a Christmas tree.  

Sounds torturous. Just be sure to refrain from making anything but the most neutral comments about the situation while at work.... or you'll be "volunteered" to be in charge of the new, improved party next year.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

I would have wanted to blow my brains out. I HATE those kinds of games and forbid my SIL from having any at my bridal shower and baby shower.

People came up later and thanked me for not making them play stupid games. So see I'm not socially awkward, I'm smart.

More people hate those games than you realize, but everyone feels pressured to go along with it and smile for the sake of the party planner.

[Lizard Queen]

In my group of friends, instead of trying to find gifts for 6-9 other people (some of which I know better than others), we went to one gift and those games. It's fine because of the company.  This year, I still didn't want to buy some generic gift just to get a generic gift that would gather dust. One of my friends suggested skipping it as she has "enough candles and lotion".  I couldn't agree more! 

There was one party mixer game at a work party one year that was really good.  A slip of paper with a famous person's name was pinned to your back, and you had to ask the other people questions to figure it out.

[Cookies Galore]

White elephants are fun, even sober. Sitting in a circle passing the same few gifts around doesn't sound like much fun. This coming from someone who is super social and loves work parties/lunches! I'm on the party planning committee for my department (100 people) and this year we hired a barbershop quartet. I love adorable old men! Sexist jokes are cute coming from an 82-year-old. Lol.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

have such a hard time not showing my impatience with games where I pass a present right and left for 10 minutes and it ends in one space down from where it starts and then we have to open them one person at a time so we can all see

How many gifts did you end up having to pass around?

I'm curious because depending on the amount of people I might have gone into a homicidal rage before the party ended.

[movingforward]

The worst are those stupid baby shower games.  The candy bar in a diaper one... .  My friend decided we were all going to play taboo at her baby shower.  That was fun!  I love REAL games but that cheesy crap needs to go! 

[movingforward]

Dec 19, 2014 9:42:32 GMT -5 Cookies Galore said:

White elephants are fun, even sober. Sitting in a circle passing the same few gifts around doesn't sound like much fun. This coming from someone who is super social and loves work parties/lunches! I'm on the party planning committee for my department (100 people) and this year we hired a barbershop quartet. I love adorable old men! Sexist jokes are cute coming from an 82-year-old. Lol.

White elephants are fun, except when you are in an office of 15 people and your supervisor has NPD.  It then turns into a situation where the boss decides she likes such and such and you had better not steal it, or at the very least make sure what she wants ends up in her hands

[giramomma]

Dec 19, 2014 7:05:20 GMT -5 oped said:

I really was too tired and shouldn't have gone to the mom's Christmas Party last night. Not that I didn't have fun talking to other people but oh man, I have such a hard time not showing my impatience with games where I pass a present right and left for 10 minutes and it ends in one space down from where it starts and then we have to open them one person at a time so we can all see... Etc.

Am I the only one? 

Sigh. 

No.

It's going to be family-ploza at Christmas time, pretty much revolving around BIL and his fiance. At least we've met his fiance. Everyone else we are meeting, this will be their first and only time meeting her. So, it's not like people want to talk with DH and I.

There will be other kids there at various times, so I'm just planning on drinking, knitting, and chilling with DH.

I am going out to dinner with my soon to be SIL by herself one night so we can get to know each other better. That way, too, I don't have to try to compete with the other 20 or so people that we'll be mingling with in a 48 hour period of time. (Some of the folks we are getting together with, I haven't met more than twice, and DH and I have been together for 20 years, now.)

 I remember being overwhelmed with DH's family when we were engaged. I don't want to pile on to that feeling for soon-to-be SIL.

[Cookies Galore]

Dec 19, 2014 9:49:48 GMT -5 movingforward said:

The worst are those stupid baby shower games.  The candy bar in a diaper one... .  My friend decided we were all going to play taboo at her baby shower.  That was fun!  I love REAL games but that cheesy crap needs to go! 

And the baby in the ice cube (the water breaking game)! Drowned babies are a creepy game!

[giramomma]

Dec 19, 2014 9:49:48 GMT -5 movingforward said:

The worst are those stupid baby shower games.  The candy bar in a diaper one... .  My friend decided we were all going to play taboo at her baby shower.  That was fun!  I love REAL games but that cheesy crap needs to go! 

One baby shower I went to, they froze little plastic babies in ice cubes and used that in our drinks. I thought that was super creepy.

[bean29]

Dec 19, 2014 8:35:44 GMT -5 Wisconsin Beth said:

Dec 19, 2014 8:25:09 GMT -5 laterbloomer said:

The games are just something to do with your hands while you're talking. And you say gravy and deep fried likes it a bad thing

I can't speak for oped but for my DH, it is a bad thing as he's gluten free.  Gravy usually has gluten in it.  If they don't have a dedicated fryer for gluten free foods, you get cross contamination.    We'd rather DH not spend the next few hours to a day recovering from eating gluten. 

Holidays are hard.  We're going to his Mom's for Christmas breakfast and have to bring food for him to eat.  She's flat out said she's not making something separate for him.  In her defense, she usually does try to make something for DH but dinner is so much easier than breakfast, esp. since DH has dairy issues too.  So no gluten, no cheese and no milk makes breakfast more challenging. 

I am lactose intollerant also, and I really don't like to go out to breakfast b/c most entres have eggs or dairy.  Usually if it is a nice breakfast buffet though I can do fruit and oatmeal (If I can make it myself).  So, his mother can't serve mellon and pineapple, strawberries etc? 

[Wisconsin Beth]

Oh I'm sure there will be a bit of fruit there.  But she'll do some fancy egg dish and a fancy version of french toast or pancakes type thing.  So we'll figure something out that we can make in advance and reheat (or bake) for DH there. 

And I think (maybe wishful thinking on my part) that she's finally starting to figure out that the way they've been doing Christmas for the last 40+ years is not necessarily the best way to do it now, esp. as she and FIL get older and the family's expanded.  This format worked great for an unmarried adult son and a married adult son whose wife's family is not on close terms.  Adding 1 grandchild in and it still worked.  Adding another DIL in (this one close to her family) and it still worked ok.  Add 2 more grandkids and it's not such a good format anymore.  The food issues and mobility issues (FIL and to a lesser extent MIL) isn't helping it any either.  I'm not rocking the boat this year, not more than I normally do anyway...)

[giramomma]

I also want to say, that when I want to be "off" after a long day of being "on"-it's super hard being on. Even when alcohol is involved. Alcohol doesn't do much to recharge me. The only thing that does is being quiet..

Personally, I'd just cut yourself some slack.

ETA: If some one deems me to be a party pooper, that's their problem.

[Sam_2.0]

We are doing the white elephant game at mom & dad's for the adults this year. The rule is we bring something that we wouldn't mind taking home ourselves, so hopefully it limits the super cheesy presents.  Too bad we can't drink while we play  We will go to my sisters after and can be more relaxed.

I hated being on the party planning committee at work. Everyone gripes about the stupid games, but they gripe about not having them either. One year we did Geeks Who Drink and that was really fun. They bring in a person to do some type of trivia - we chose a music theme. Each table was a team and the winning team got some "not so fabulous" prizes We also did a gift exchange. Most people brought wine or chocolates, so it wasn't too bad.

[zibazinski]

I send a gift and regrets to any shower. It's a gift grab anyway so my presence isn't missed, my present would be. 

[Deleted]

I think there were 16 of us.

My problem is that it's hard for me to not look like I'd rather be doing anything else than passing presents around. I do not have a good poker face.

Then I blurt. You know the sweet young new mom says. 'Now we have to open them one by one so everyone can see' and I say 'no, seriously' before looking in her eyes to see yes, she is most definitely serious, and then I have to switch gears and try to be all 'great idea' which fools absolutely no one...

[Deleted]

As for the food, usually I don't eat any gluten, corn products, soy... very limited dairy and picky about oils, etc. so yeah, buffets are a minefield generally. I did eat a big late lunch though, because I knew. And usually the girls are very accommodating about picking places to eat, so it's not a normal thing ... It was, you know, special...

Man, maybe I'm just a snobby biotch.

[Sam_2.0]

The more I get to know about you, oped, the more I think I like you

[zibazinski]

I have no issue with trouncing stupid ideas.

[zibazinski]

Or you could excuse yourself for a 30 minute bathroom break and play on your phone.