zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 18, 2014 13:52:29 GMT -5
I hope you mean the beer! Not some overweight dude whose parents didn't get married!
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Peace Of Mind
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[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Dec 18, 2014 13:54:53 GMT -5
I hope you mean the beer! Not some overweight dude whose parents didn't get married! That was the name of the Pinot Noir we had. How much wine did you drink that you don't remember that?!
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 18, 2014 13:56:00 GMT -5
Santa's Ass, you're right!
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greeniis10
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Post by greeniis10 on Dec 18, 2014 14:42:29 GMT -5
The kids would just assume I'm having second thoughts. Still, hyper ventilating in front of them isn't my idea of mom behavior. DF says he will do whatever I want but I have to reimburse him! "Mom behavior"? To the contrary. I think you'd be clearly giving your children the message that marriage IS a big deal. One to be thoroughly thought out, not easily thrown away if/when things get tough, like a lot of people seem to think. I can't believe how some people enter and exit marriages with no consideration of the work involved. In your case I do think you've thoroughly thought this one out and need to just go for it! Would love to see pictures.
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Tennesseer
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Post by Tennesseer on Dec 18, 2014 14:45:52 GMT -5
zibazinski-how will your life change if you go through with getting married? What will be different than from what it is today?
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 18, 2014 16:00:30 GMT -5
I don't know exactly. I guess it's a loss of freedom after so many years. With no legal paper, I always have an "out" even though I would never take it. Also, I know no one with a second happy marriage. I barely know anyone with a first. I sure never was. Marriage is good for some, not so good for others. I may be one of those "others." i will do my best with pictures. I finally figured out how to get them onto FB. I'm sure I can get help from posters here. First, I have to go through with it.
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on Dec 18, 2014 16:08:37 GMT -5
i will do my best with pictures. I finally figured out how to get them onto FB. I'm sure I can get help from posters here. First, I have to go through with it.
Don't stress about the pictures. We would love to see them but it's more important for you to be happy and non-panicky on your wedding day. You had a bad experience with marriage. It's totally natural for you to be freaked
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Dec 18, 2014 16:52:28 GMT -5
No, he isn't turning into a total d-bag. I'm just looking for excuses. It was okay when it was WAY out there in the future but the future is closing in on me. I know it's a piece of paper and I know everyone wants it. The last time I tried to do it, I had a panic attack. I've never had one before. What if I do it again? In front of my kids, in front of DF? We'll tell them you had something for dinner last night that didn't agree with you?
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Peace Of Mind
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Dec 18, 2014 16:54:19 GMT -5
I don't know exactly. I guess it's a loss of freedom after so many years. With no legal paper, I always have an "out" even though I would never take it. Also, I know no one with a second happy marriage. I barely know anyone with a first. I sure never was. Marriage is good for some, not so good for others. I may be one of those "others." i will do my best with pictures. I finally figured out how to get them onto FB. I'm sure I can get help from posters here. First, I have to go through with it. LOL! Just because I won't let DH eat his weight in carbs doesn't mean we aren't happy! (Speaking of Fat Bastard)
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 18, 2014 17:03:29 GMT -5
POM!
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Peace Of Mind
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Dec 18, 2014 17:04:37 GMT -5
LMAO!!! I couldn't resist.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 18, 2014 17:05:43 GMT -5
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Tennesseer
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Post by Tennesseer on Dec 18, 2014 20:37:22 GMT -5
I don't know exactly. I guess it's a loss of freedom after so many years. With no legal paper, I always have an "out" even though I would never take it. Also, I know no one with a second happy marriage. I barely know anyone with a first. I sure never was. Marriage is good for some, not so good for others. I may be one of those "others." i will do my best with pictures. I finally figured out how to get them onto FB. I'm sure I can get help from posters here. First, I have to go through with it. This is starting to read like the script from Runaway Bride. Hang in there. Eyes straight ahead and focus on the DF only.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 18, 2014 22:16:54 GMT -5
Yeah, he's been on the phone trying to calm me down. Poor man.
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Knee Deep in Water Chloe
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Post by Knee Deep in Water Chloe on Dec 18, 2014 22:25:58 GMT -5
I don't know exactly. I guess it's a loss of freedom after so many years. With no legal paper, I always have an "out" even though I would never take it. Also, I know no one with a second happy marriage. I barely know anyone with a first. I sure never was. Marriage is good for some, not so good for others. I may be one of those "others." i will do my best with pictures. I finally figured out how to get them onto FB. I'm sure I can get help from posters here. First, I have to go through with it. Before I even got to POM's post, I thought "well, you know me, and you know POM." Seriously, my marriage is fantastic. From my going through my first marriage, I figured out what I was shitty at wife-wise I figured out what type of man I wanted I figured out type of marriage I wanted Then, miraculously, the most awesome guy showed up in my life and put a ring on it. And now, I have a happy second marriage. I wish you and DF all the best.
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mmhmm
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It's a great pity the right of free speech isn't based on the obligation to say something sensible.
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Post by mmhmm on Dec 18, 2014 22:28:32 GMT -5
*wraps some socks around zibazinski's chilly feet* Now, zib. Just relax, hon. It's going to be fine.
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mmhmm
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It's a great pity the right of free speech isn't based on the obligation to say something sensible.
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Post by mmhmm on Dec 18, 2014 22:32:08 GMT -5
I don't know exactly. I guess it's a loss of freedom after so many years. With no legal paper, I always have an "out" even though I would never take it. Also, I know no one with a second happy marriage. I barely know anyone with a first. I sure never was. Marriage is good for some, not so good for others. I may be one of those "others." i will do my best with pictures. I finally figured out how to get them onto FB. I'm sure I can get help from posters here. First, I have to go through with it. Zib, I had a wonderful second marriage. I couldn't have asked for more. My first marriage was a disaster but the second one was exactly right. Like you, I was afraid to take the chance again. It took me five years to make the decision to go through with it. I'd probably have procrastinated longer if he hadn't been going back abroad to live and work. Had I done so, it would have been a big mistake. I knew him, loved him, and trusted him. It was time. I've never regretted the decision for an instant.
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zibazinski
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I did it!
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 18, 2014 22:57:30 GMT -5
We've been together more than 5 years now. Surely I'd know if he was going to turn into Satans Spawn, right?
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cronewitch
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Post by cronewitch on Dec 18, 2014 23:26:01 GMT -5
If you are afraid you will melt down in front of the guest you could get married an hour before the public display so you could relax with the I does in front of people because it was a done deal.
Go for it you know what you are getting and accept him as he is that is all you can ask for.
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Dec 18, 2014 23:26:20 GMT -5
i will do my best with pictures. I finally figured out how to get them onto FB. I'm sure I can get help from posters here. First, I have to go through with it. Don't stress about the pictures. We would love to see them but it's more important for you to be happy and non-panicky on your wedding day. You had a bad experience with marriage. It's totally natural for you to be freaked Hey, speak for yourself. For ME, it's ALL about the pics!!! zibazinski, pictures please!!
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 19, 2014 9:11:54 GMT -5
Only guests are my kids. Since they aren't all that thrilled anyway but will put happy face on for my sake, if I "cow" in front of them, it's not going to make them any happier.
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Dec 19, 2014 9:32:08 GMT -5
I've got an idea that will put a smile on everyone's face: Have the wedding at a nudist resort. Seriously, how upset, nervous or worried could any one person be if everyone is nekkid? Of course, it could make posting pictures a bit of a challenge.
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Pants
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Post by Pants on Dec 19, 2014 9:38:19 GMT -5
Go to a doctor. Get a prescription for Xanax. Take 1/2 one 1/2 hour before the ceremony. You'll be fine.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 19, 2014 9:41:19 GMT -5
I have some up north. I could ask him to bring them with him.
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on Dec 19, 2014 9:57:57 GMT -5
Zib, my dad and stepmom just celebrated 27 years of marriage; happy second marriages do exist!
I agree with the xanax. My stepmom and I joked about having a xanax bar at my wedding. I think for her it was a joke about my mom and sister being there (NOT a good situation), but for me, I was freaked the fuck out about marriage! Still am. Some days I feel like I sold out (and I definitely get annoyed at all the mislabeled Christmas cards in the mail - I am NOT Mrs. His Name!), but hubs is an awesome guy and the positive feels about being married to him outweigh the not-so-positive. Aa for our actual wedding day, I didn't have a worry at all! I was a mess leading up to it (personal feelings towards such a legal commitment, family drama, nerves) but the day of was nice. Lol, I just remembered that we watched Sons of Anarchy together while I waited for my brother to pick me up.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 19, 2014 10:24:29 GMT -5
I can do this.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Dec 19, 2014 10:31:12 GMT -5
I can do this. Hell to the yes you can.
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Dec 19, 2014 10:39:38 GMT -5
I can do this. <<The brandy I sneaked into your hot cocoa is certainly good for ya. Or did I sneak some hot cocoa into your brandy? I cannot remember.>>
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Cookies Galore
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I don't need no instructions to know how to rock
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I did it!
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Post by Cookies Galore on Dec 19, 2014 10:42:34 GMT -5
I can do this. <<The brandy I sneaked into your hot cocoa is certainly good for ya. Or did I sneak some hot cocoa into your brandy? I cannot remember.>> Yum! I put B&B in my hot chocolate. :-)
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Dec 19, 2014 10:47:41 GMT -5
<<The brandy I sneaked into your hot cocoa is certainly good for ya. Or did I sneak some hot cocoa into your brandy? I cannot remember.>> Yum! I put B&B in my hot chocolate. :-) I bought some Grand Marnier for baking (I use it to make truffles and brownies) but I think a bit of it will wind up in our coffee this weekend. I never thought about that until you posted. You've corrupted me. And I appreciate that.
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