Why do people complain so much over silly things?

[Phoenix84]

Why are some people so adamant about complaining to others about silly and frivolous things?

To illustrate my point, a guy from the warehouse here at work left a big delivery truck parked over the weekend next to a loading dock that runs up against a road. As a result, traffic had to steer around the truck because it was partially blocking the road. I overheard the facilities people talking how their phones rang constantly about people complaining about it.

While not really "complaining" much one time an old woman yelled at me for driving in a parking lot with slots that were angled 'against the grain."

I told this story before, but one time a woman in another car flagged me down and said she called the sheriff to report that I was a drunk driver and texting. When in reality I wasn't drunk at all, was lost and trying to get my GPS programed.

In current and past jobs, my vision has come under scrutiny.  Apparently people got really upset for some reason that I hold things closer to my face to read than most and complained to my boss about it.

In any case, I can see, at least in some of those cases, why people might be a little teed off, but why to the point of complaining?

In my entire adult life, I cannot think of a single instance where I "told" or "tattled" on someone.  I have never complained to someone in an official capacity over the actions of someone else, except maybe when that lady hit my car and I reported it to her insurance.

I was always raised that you don't "tattle" on people unless it's a very grave or serious matter, like a violation of the law or an unsafe practice.

So why do people do this?  Is it a symptom of the increasing narcissism of our society?

[Deleted]

Sept 8, 2014 13:23:25 GMT -5 Phoenix84 said:

I was always raised that you don't "tattle" on people unless it's a very grave or serious matter, like a violation of the law or an unsafe practice.

Well, if I saw someone weaving all over the road I might call to report a drunk driver.  If you were just programming your GPS you can tell that to to the cops, but I wouldn't know just from avoiding getting sideswiped. 

[hoops902]

::I was always raised that you don't "tattle" on people unless it's a very grave or serious matter, like a violation of the law or an unsafe practice.::

You mean like a truck partially blocking a road, someone driving the wrong direction down a one lane thoroughfare, or playing with their GPS while driving?  All of those are either against the law or unsafe (I think flagging someone down to yell at them doesn't really change anything, but that doesn't change that it's not safe).

Personally, i wouldn't report any of it because I don't think reporting it helps, but I'm kind of glad other people do.  I don't get the vision thing...if you're blind as a bat it isn't any of my concern unless you do something wrong with a document I gave you because of it.

[Abby Normal]

I can see the first as valid.  If the truck is parked partially in the road, causing the drivers to enter the oncoming lane- it's an issue.  I don't know if I would call and complain, but I can see where it would annoy people.

As for the GPS- maybe you were swerving?

But we have "tattlers" here at my work all the time.  Some are good, some are not.  We had one bicyclist who came in to complain because our semitruck didn't pull into the oncoming lane to pass him.   hmm- there was traffic in that lane so he couldn't. He wasn't in the bike lane- sorry it made you nervous but don't ride your bike on a two lane highway.  Unfortunately for the biker- I happened to be coming back from lunch and was just behind the truck. So the driver wasn't written up like the biker hoped.

[justme]

People who go down the wrong way in angled parking lots are annoying. There's arrows that show you the right way and all the cars angled one way are pretty obvious. I've almost gotten hit several time by idiots not paying attention and going the wrong way (or trying to back out of a spot the wrong way) and have gotten into a mexican stand off where the other person who isn't going the right way won't move out of the way.

[HoneyBBQ]

No fucking perspective.

[alabamagal]

Well partially blocking a road and driving the wrong way are safety issues.  Both are unsafe.

I would complain about that.

[ArchietheDragon]

Sept 8, 2014 15:07:44 GMT -5 HoneyBBQ said:

No fucking perspective.

You mean like the perspective where all you see are old goat balls slapping around?  Who wants to see that?

[Sam_2.0]

My life is frivilous complaints. Maybe 5% or less of the complaints I get are justified - where we did mess something up and need to fix it. The rest are just griping about us being unwilling to work with someone that hasn't paid their bills in 10 months

I will gripe and whine about things to DH or on here, but rarely do I actually make a formal complaint about something.

[Angel!]

I think some people have a lot of time on their hands, so they complain about everything that bugs them.  It would really have to bother me for me to take the time.  My annoyance has to be greater than the amount of effort complaining will require.  Not many things meet that threshhold.

[HoneyBBQ]

Sept 8, 2014 15:39:44 GMT -5 ArchietheDragon said:

Sept 8, 2014 15:07:44 GMT -5 HoneyBBQ said:

No fucking perspective.

You mean like the perspective where all you see are old goat balls slapping around?  Who wants to see that?

Spending a career around cancer patients makes you think slapping goat balls aren't all that bad. 

[Deleted]

Because stupid things happen a lot. Usually it is someone's selfishness in doing what is easiest for them without consideration about how it affects anyone else. You get tired of it.

[techguy]

Sept 8, 2014 13:23:25 GMT -5 Phoenix84 said:

Why are some people so adamant about complaining to others about silly and frivolous things?

Ironically, you are frivolously complaining about other people's frivolous complaining.

[Phoenix84]

Sept 8, 2014 18:34:36 GMT -5 techguy said:

Sept 8, 2014 13:23:25 GMT -5 Phoenix84 said:

Why are some people so adamant about complaining to others about silly and frivolous things?

Ironically, you are frivolously complaining about other people's frivolous complaining.

Touché salesmen.

[Opti]

Sept 8, 2014 16:02:06 GMT -5 Angel! said:

I think some people have a lot of time on their hands, so they complain about everything that bugs them.  It would really have to bother me for me to take the time.  My annoyance has to be greater than the amount of effort complaining will require.  Not many things meet that threshhold.

While that can be true of some people, I think its more personality and

how one chooses to view life.

At work I've seen some patients whine and complain all the time because it

seems to be part of who they are and others who put up with some pretty awful

stuff with a smile. Complaining really takes very little effort. You post on this board,

open up your mouth and speak, etc.

ETA: Some of it can be medical, stress or situational related too. Very anxious

people can whine a lot and people in severe pain who are new to it can do like-wise.

[toomuchreality]

Sept 8, 2014 18:34:36 GMT -5 techguy said:

Sept 8, 2014 13:23:25 GMT -5 Phoenix84 said:

Why are some people so adamant about complaining to others about silly and frivolous things?

Ironically, you are frivolously complaining about other people's frivolous complaining.

LOL   I thought the same thing, when I read the post. (That's just an observation, not a complaint, just so you know!  )


In my opinion there's a difference between complaining and whining. If it's a valid complaint, then I say go for it.
If it's something I don't like, I want to influence change. Often times nothing gets done (things don't change), if the responsible party isn't aware, or thinks it isn't bothering anyone. I certainly don't want to be thought of as a PIA or a whiner though. I've worked in customer service. You get lots of complaints and lots of whiners.

There are many products out there, for which you can get a coupon for a free replacement, if you let the manufacturer know there was an issue. (You can give feedback without being a total B.)

I have often times said that if people would compliment, half as often as they complain, the world would be a much better place. I'm big on giving positive feedback. I would much rather give kudos for a job well done, than file a complaint for bad service.



FWIW:
Ha! I'm taking a bottle of Clorox II back to the store, because the store is currently using some really bad shopping bags. Several bags ripped when the checker was bagging my items. More ripped when I was putting them in my car. Then more again when I was trying to get in the house with them. UGH! The Clorox II bottle busted open when it hit the ground. I called and advised the store. They told me to bring it back. So I am.


Have a good evening!   

[Angel!]

Sept 8, 2014 20:47:06 GMT -5 Opti said:

Sept 8, 2014 16:02:06 GMT -5 Angel! said:

I think some people have a lot of time on their hands, so they complain about everything that bugs them.  It would really have to bother me for me to take the time.  My annoyance has to be greater than the amount of effort complaining will require.  Not many things meet that threshhold.

While that can be true of some people, I think its more personality and

how one chooses to view life.

At work I've seen some patients whine and complain all the time because it

seems to be part of who they are and others who put up with some pretty awful

stuff with a smile. Complaining really takes very little effort. You post on this board,

open up your mouth and speak, etc.

ETA: Some of it can be medical, stress or situational related too. Very anxious

people can whine a lot and people in severe pain who are new to it can do like-wise.

You are right, just complaining takes little effort. But, complaining to the right person, such as calling a company because of how their truck is parked takes a lot more work. I would have to figure out the phone number to call & then probably end up talking to an idiot & it just isn't worth my time. That is the type of complaining I was really talking about...the complaining to someone that actually has the power to do anything.

And I think you are right, it is a lot of personality.  I have a friend that loves to bitch about everything.  I have learned she wants nothing but sympathy.  Any actual suggestion to fix a stupid problem of hers is met with "Yeah, but..." and then a reason why she can't possibly do that. 

[weltschmerz]

When I was so sick in the hospital and suffering with the most indescribable pain imaginable, I remember looking out the window at impatient drivers honking their horns in traffic. I promised myself that if I get through this, I will never complain about trivial things again. Things went from bad to worse and they sent for a priest to give me the Last Rites.

I recovered, but that lesson served me well. It really put things in perspective. It was four years ago, and now when I get stuck in traffic, I just laugh. When I find myself stewing over minutiae, I go back to that day and everything becomes OK again.

[Firebird]

I'll ask my toddler and let you know. 

[ZaireinHD]

because those silly things add up to BIG problems