male babysitters

[Firebird]

Aug 14, 2014 10:20:36 GMT -5 @lonewolf said:

I don't know. From experience, I've noticed that males don't seem to have the patience that the females do when dealing with kids. A crying baby will often send a male over the edge. Aren't males responsible for most of the shaken baby deaths?

Ugh, this is such an ignorant statement it sickens me.  Are women just better at everything when it comes to kids according to you?

Honest question here - why would you have kids with a man you couldn't even trust to be alone with your babies? 

[Firebird]

Aug 14, 2014 11:54:22 GMT -5 Wisconsin Beth said:

Aug 14, 2014 11:52:29 GMT -5 @lonewolf said:

I simply think that mothers are gifted with a patience with children that some men don't have. My husband is the kindest most gentle man I have ever met, yet I know how easily he can freak out when put under too much stress, coming from too many directions. More than likely nothing would have happened, but I never wanted to take that chance. It's not pathetic. It's being protective in a situation where I can foresee a problem.

It's also not giving him a chance to stretch and grow as a person.

And I had to snort at the mothers are gifted with patience but I clearly was standing behind a door when they were handing out that gift. 

Me too!  My husband is much more patient with Babybird than I am at times (depends on the activity) but I'm definitely not gifted with any "special patience" for her toddler BS. 

She's mine when she's being an angel toddler.  When she's being a devil toddler, she's DH's daughter

[zibazinski]

I have zero patience. That being said, I get that babies and small children aren't "acting up" because they want to but because that's the only way they can communicate their needs. I can handle that. What I can't handle and never did, was the poor behavior once they were old enough to express their feelings with words. Telling me you don't feel well or don't want to wear the pink is different than boo-hooing and having a hissy fit. Those behaviors got an instant sent to the room until they could talk and behave civilized. My house, my rules. You aren't ruining my meal with your attitude.
the public thing was "do we need to have a conversation?" That got immediate attention because that meant a visit to the coat closet or someplace private for more than just a gentle reminder about behavior in public places.

[greeniis10]

Aug 14, 2014 16:06:57 GMT -5 goldensam said:

Aug 14, 2014 12:31:09 GMT -5 greeniis10 said:

He's 53 but his mom ingrained those gender-roles into her kids.  The girls were to cook and clean and take care of their brothers!    The boys were just to be "good men".  Gag.  Thankfully, overall DH has risen above that (or we would not be married!). 

My mom is 48 and was raised the same way.  She had to stay in and cook, clean, and take care of her 4 brothers while they did whatever they wanted.  I was raised by a single mom (minus a few stepdads) so there was no such thing as "men's work" or "women's work" in our house.

Good thing there are people like your mom that know well enough to break the cycle!  I do not believe in "men's work" or "women's work", either, but whenever DH really wants to get me irate he'll make mention of, "Why am I doing this? Isn't this "women's work"?"  Of course, I know he's kidding since he's retired and I work full time so he does the majority of housework now.

[sheilaincali]

whenever DH really wants to get me irate he'll make mention of, "Why am I doing this? Isn't this "women's work"?

Slightly OT-  We watch old episodes of "It's Always Sunny" and collectively (as a family) refer to any chore or task we don't want to do as "Charlie Work".  So far "Charlie" hasn't come by to scrub the bathrooms or anything so we are stuck doing it ourselves.