March Madness Controlled/No Spend Thread

[dakota4600]

Yippee and OMG at the same time. The place I sent my resume a month ago just called and wants to interview me! My stomach is doing flip flops at the thought of it, but I'll call them back and schedule the interview here in a bit.

[singlemomky]

Shan - Karma to you for your response to Dividend.
Sheila - You'll get Karma too as soon as I'm allowed!
Dakota - Yay for you! Good juju to you!

Lil' Smokey is doing Jump Rope for Heart today - he was so excited b/c he just learned how to jump while crossing the rope. He also was ecstatic to see that he had earned 6 prize levels with his donations!

[Honeylioness]

SES - I sent you an e-mail

sprby - I sent you a message via this board as I could not find your e-mail address


Thanks ladies for looking over these notes.

[dakota4600]

Durn it! I talked to the guy and the organization in a state of flux right now. The Executive director (ED) gave her notice recently and is leaving at the end of the month, so they are now going to be filling that position first. He wanted to know if I was interested in a contract position to do the work until the new ED is hired and then hopefully they would bring me on permanent full time. I had to say no to that option, I don't mind switching jobs, but losing benefits and then having to re apply for the job I was doing and hope to be brought on staff later didn't sound like a good deal. I did however give the guy information about an organization that does back office support for non-profits, because he said they were in a desperate position trying to keep up with the back office. Hopefully he'll get in touch with them and be able to use them on an interm basis and then call me when they are ready to fill the position internally. He said my resume was very strong and I sounded like kind of person they would want on their team. So that was good at least.

[ses]

Honey--Karma for dealing with her. You have email.

[dividend]

Thanks for the supportive words, ladies. I'll be spreading karma around for that. I've struggled (and emerged successfully) through getting my own bipolar disorder under control, with the help of wonderful family and friends who loved me. I wanted to be able to pay back their loving support by being that person for DBF now. If it comes down to it though, I will have to put myself first if it becomes too much to handle. I hope it doesn't come to that. Much love to those of you who are dealing/have dealt with this.

dakota - that sucks about the job. But it sounds like there's a chance they'll come back to you once they're actually hiring for it, so that's good, right? Oh, and I'm done with classes - graduated in December! Thanks for asking.

[redwagon]

just wanted to wish you all a happy weekend. sounds like some rough times for a lot of you. hugs!!

Last night had fun with startsmart (how am I only now just meeting her?) and red2black (it had been too long!) and got nice and tipsy.

[mizbear]

dividend- I agree with sheila's advice. I am bipolar myself, with other issues (let's just say I can be a real trip sometimes) and have done the get out and walk thing myself- I have also put my DB out in the middle of a snowstorm and made him walk. I too, try to keep to a strict diet. I send you lots of HUGS and am here if you want to talk.
sheila- Karma for the great advice!
Congrats to those with good job news- even if you can't take the jobs- knowing you have what they want is a plus!
HUGS for the puppy people- and the cat people too.

Today was a NS- I was supposed to buy paper towels on sale today, but DM paid for them because I spent 2 hours crawling in the attic installing pest repellers and doing repairs. I just realized I made $2/hour on that job- I think I got gyped!
Well, take some ibuprofen for my knees- which hurt like I am running high school track again- and back to the grind.

[dakota4600]

Need prayers for my little bro. He went in to have an outpatient procedure and it ended being more complicated than they could handle there so he has been transferred to a hospital for the weekend for pain management, then they are going to transfer him again to a different hospital with a specialist who can preform the procedure on Monday. At least that is the info I have right now.

[muttleynfelix]

dakota - 1. I get the feeling that Ben would be that little boy crying for mommy every morning. Since he cries when I leave the house which is my major aversion to daycare at this point. DH is the one that is more against daycare in general, but DS will be going to preschool as soon as he's old enough. 2. That stinks about the position being in a state of flux. I would not go for it in that situation either. 3. Will definatly have your bro in our prayers to night.

BIL is back after being in AZ for the month. DS is playing with him and DH and is somewhat happy, so even though I want to play with him, I'll leave them be. I went to the World Day of Prayer service at church (and was the only person under 50, but had fun anyway). Anyway, I'm eating the lunch afterwards and the ladies put an insane number of cooked carrots on each plate. Well, I ate everything else, but I didn't eat the ALL my carrots. My pastor was being given a hard time for not eating all her carrots and then she looked at my plate and started giving me a hard time for not eating all of my carrots. It was pretty funny. I helped clean up, then went to my office to get my paycheck, get gas and go to the bank.

[mizbear]

dakota- Prayers for your brother.

I am going to try getting a box from angelfood ministries this month- the fruit and veggie box. Looks like a good deal. For $23 I get:
1 head of iceberg lettuce, 1 head of green cabbage, 1 lb carrots, 4 lg baking potatoes, 3 lb bag sweet potatoes, 2 lb bag yellow onions, 1 golden ripe pinapple, 1 cantaloupe, 1 lb red seedless grapes, 4 california lemons, 16 oz bottled salad dressing, 1 bag salad croutons plus a recipe sheet.
I know that I can freeze shredded or diced potato or sweet potato, and diced onion, and I can freeze the zest off the lemons. I can also puree and freeze the cantaloupe if I find I am not eating it fast enough. Any ideas how to preserve the other stuff to make it last as long as possible? I am considering grating and freezing the carrots as well.

[InsertCoolName]

Hello. Not sure what to say here.

I use to lurk over on msn. Always wanted to join in then but my wonderful husband doesn't understand the whole needless spending. I mean we aren't on our way to the poor house or anything but we do have a budget.
So does anyone else have that issue? How do you deal with that? I've read here/msn about having fun money but we only have 1 account and setting up another isn't something I or even he wishes to mess with. And it's not huge amounts it's just the stopping in at the gas station and getting a drink when he is already on his way home. His reason is he was low on pop at home. Well then go to the store? lol
So while I can go days/weeks without spending....him? Not so much. Like I said it's just a pop or lottery ticket(why?) and it's not going to cause the lights to be shut off, it's still annoying.

We are expecting our 5th baby in June and will be getting baby stuff soon. I know we will be buying a new car seat, so that can be a lot of $$. We MIGHT have to get a new crib mattress not sure yet. The one we have is over 4 yrs old, not sure if it's still safe. We have NO boy clothes as our last one was a little girl. But to start he(the baby) won't need many. I am sure we will get those all 2nd hand.

Sorry. Anyways my point is I know there will be some spending coming up in the next few months and want all our money to go to the needs and not any wants. I know gonna be hard to stop the wants when it comes to a new baby. But babies do NOT have to cost a lot of money. But I do need to keep track of what the money is being spent on and maybe you ladies(guys?) would be the place to get support. If I can keep up that is. lol

[spruby]

honey - I got the message - I'll be replying and include my email - but may kudos to you for not slapping her upside the head for the 2nd one

[mizbear]

momof5- My cousin and his wife were able to get a lot of their baby stuff on sale. Babies R Us, Target, Wal-Mart, you can get great sales- sometimes online coupons.

[MittenKitten]

momof5: Welcome! Also congrats on the baby. I would suggest seeing if anyone has boy hand me downs and garage sales. Thrift stores or clearance section for the next year are also great. Many here have struggled with DH not being on board. It seems when you start and start talking about it and the people here many get on board. I would also suggest giving DH his own fun money in cash. If he wants to throw it away on a bottle of pop (or soda) that is his choice.

mizbear: The students in his karate have to earn so many black stripes to get to their next belt. The teachers use black tape and put it around the belt for a stripe.

Speaking of which DS#1 got his last stripe and the teacher spoke of how well he was doing. All set for tomorrow, just need to gas the vehicle as it is on empty.

Used my mom's car to get to karate and since she has been griping about gas I filled it up for her. Now we will see if she figures out I did it.

[spruby]

honey - I replied - good luck with that

mizbear - you are very kind for crawling around the attic - your mom and grandmom are lucky to have you (and you them)

dakota - prayers for your brother - at least he is getting care and hopefully they did not make the problem worse; prayers for your pup too

shan - I hope you are getting lots of cuddle and love time with your furbaby - prayers for you too

momof5 - i 2nd giving DH some cash to spend as he wants - that works best with my DH - I have to be careful to not say where did it go since it tends to simply leak away - but it is budgeted for (and really not much at all) and it allows me to "know" where it all our money goes

My goal this month for NS/CS/NEO/MOANs is just as many as possible. I'm fighting a bad case of the blues - it will pass - just trying to not do anything stupid (buy an itouch just 'cause I want one, quit my job, etc). They think I have 2 shoulder issues - the immediate one being frozen shoulder - to which the fundamental "cure" is time - like up to 2 years - which gives me up to 17 months to go - I should move out of the "pain" stage soon (0 to 3 months) - I can't wait I know it will help. Anything else I could say right now would be a total whine - so I'll spare you all (and me too).

Happy Friday!

[mizbear]

I have a confession to make- there are 2 sons, 4 male grandchildren, a son-in-law, an ex-SOB-in-law (my father) who has spent over 20 years tryin gto get back in the family's good graces and 2 grandsons in law.... WHY AM I CRAWLING AROUND IN THE ATTIC?
My DGF would be laughing at me if he was still alive- I was always the one he called when he needed an extra pair of hands or someone who could get into a small spot- my uncles are all 6ft or better. Of course, before he got sick, DGF would have crawling around up there with me, and 2 hours of repairs would have turned into us going through the entire attic. Then we would have sat down and had a drink (him a VO and 7, me Jack and coke or scotch and coke). LOL
I don't know how you girls do it. I would scream if I had some of the stuff on my plate that you guys deal with. I can send the kids back home because their not mine, I can walk away from my DB- except when he gets stoopid and tries to follow me, I can go home at night instead of being at the house with DM and DGM and the squirrels.... I fuss, but I really don't have any major issues, just speedbumps.
HUGS HUGS HUGS

[ses]

Dakota--prayers sent

Momof5--Congratulations! My sister, KC gal, finds fantastic deals (like 90% off original prices on quality goods) at yard sales in the spring. Just look tired and frazzled so the sellers will have pity on you and lower the price. Perhaps she will chime in on some good suggestions.
I started keeping my budget on the computer in Excel and, boy, are my problems glaring and easy to see when they are right in front of me. I use "cash only" for my fun money. A set amount each week or month, whichever works best. Perhaps weekly until the "habit" sets.

Mizar--Be sure to cook the potatoes and such before preparing for the freezer, if uncooked they turn black and yucky. Carrots and cabbage last a long time if stored properly in the veggie drawer of the fridge. You can freeze lemon juice in ice cube trays or make lemonade and then freeze in empty 20 oz soda bottles. I don't think you can freeze pineapple--just enjoy the yummy pineapple first. Oh, you can freeze grapes. Just freeze individually on a flat tray and into a baggie they go once frozen. A few frozen grapes are a great refreshing snack.

Shanen--give Smokey some loving from me.

Dakota--Ditto. Good move on the job.

spruby--I think Honey is a saint for her response. If it were me, I'd be off the board, because I would be residing somewhere else at the county's expense!

[redwagon]

dakota - sending good healthy juju your brother's way!

momof5 - welcome!! i 3rd (or is it 4th) the fun money in cash! Blue_wagon and I each get $100 a month for fun money and it goes where it goes, no questions asked. Of course, I tend to spend mine on coffee and sporatic lunches out at work, while he'll save for months then have an awesome new gadget to play with. We have such different styles, so the fun money works best for us. There's one big house account, where most of the money goes, then I still have my old checking (fun money) and savings (pathetic attempts at personal savings for fun toys, I think there's $45 in there right now haha). And he has his old checking (his fun money). It works out well for us.

have a good weekend everyone!! it's too crappy to ski today so we're saving $100+ there... but I'm kind of sad. It's been over ten years... more like 12... since I first got sick. And I always swore I'd go skiing again when I felt better, and here we are. Ah well. Maybe next year... lol. My yearly mantra...

[muttleynfelix]

Mar 4, 2011 19:24:49 GMT -5 InsertCoolName said:

Hello. Not sure what to say here.

We are expecting our 5th baby in June and will be getting baby stuff soon. I know we will be buying a new car seat, so that can be a lot of $$. We MIGHT have to get a new crib mattress not sure yet. The one we have is over 4 yrs old, not sure if it's still safe. We have NO boy clothes as our last one was a little girl. But to start he(the baby) won't need many. I am sure we will get those all 2nd hand.

Sorry. Anyways my point is I know there will be some spending coming up in the next few months and want all our money to go to the needs and not any wants. I know gonna be hard to stop the wants when it comes to a new baby. But babies do NOT have to cost a lot of money. But I do need to keep track of what the money is being spent on and maybe you ladies(guys?) would be the place to get support. If I can keep up that is. lol

Hi momof5, I saw you over on the kids thread as well. Welcome. We have a 13 mo old DS. Your crib mattress should be fine unless it was stored somewhere and got moldy (or ripped). As for carseats, check out albeebaby.com, diapers.com, and sales at BRU, Walmart, and Target, oh and amazon.com. For our infant car seat, I bought a second base at a diffent place I ordered the carseat because I could save $20. When we upgraded to a convertible carseat, I took an older model that didn't rear face as long weight wise because I know DS will out grow the carseat by height long before weight. I got a Britax Boulevard for $200 (regular price $320). Of the "rules" that might have changed since your last child, they no longer sell drop side cribs and it is now recommended to rear face in a car seat until at least 2 yrs and 30 lbs. Ummm...what else could I tell you that you don't already know? Probably nothing. LOL. We cloth diaper DS, but there was some great deals on diapers at Walgreens. Sam on the kids thread knows all of those details.

[spruby]

ses - the fact the honey is even willing to continue to work with those numb skulls makes her far saintly than me. I'd be smacking the b**ch upside the head. Honey clearly cares about her community and is willing to invest her time and talent in making things good for everyone. I suspect the email writer is a busybody who is on the Board so she can stick her nose in where it doesn't belong.

[muttleynfelix]

So last night a little before 5, I got a raging headache and was nausous. So, I go lay down and end up falling asleep. I woke up briefly when DH brought DS to the door and said say good night mommy, i woke up at 12:30 and was up for a couple hours, up at 5:30 with DS and then up at 8 for the day! Nuts. I still have a little bit of a headache, but not too bad. I pretty sure it was all weather related. We had a strong cold front go through bringing severe weather. When I laid down for bed it was 61 in SPringfield, but 45 in Joplin (I live 20 miles from springfield and 50 miles from Joplin). Anyway, It is suppose to be cold today. Yuck.

[moneysquirrel]

Update: 3 NS Days 1 CS Day

Dakota -- good juju being sent your way for both your DB and your job.

Muttley -- sending some to you for an improvement in your job area as well

Momof5 -- Welcome. It will take some time to get the hang of this. Don't worry - we all have times when we slip. It happens. I think that just coming here will provide you with some ideas, tools, and support to keep on tracking. I think that if you can track your expenses for a month or two you will see your leaks and can begin to develop steps to plug them. The cash system for "fun" money is one used by many.


Have no idea what today brings. I do need to stop at HD to get a few items -- all needed and on the list. If I stick to that then I will count it as a controlled spend otherwise it will be a spend.

I did manage to get all the papers finished last night. That gives me the week off with just some planning to do for the next few weeks.

Have to get a move on and get the errands done before the weather gets worse.

[mizbear]

ses- Thanks for the tips! DB loves pineapple and has offered to "butcher" the pineapple and grill it!
spruby- I sooo agree about "Miss Condo Board"- Honey is a much better person than I! I would Gibbs-Slap that "woman"!

Today is a NS for me- the nieces are here eating my homemade mac n cheese.

[InsertCoolName]

Morning and thanks for the welcomes!

I think that for this month I will track both what I spend and what my husband spends. I'm not going to count our bills because, well they aren't there for suggestions...you gotta pay. lol I'm always amazed at the people I know who say "well don't have enough for that one, let's go out." Gas for work and getting kids to school is a need too.

Do you ladies count OTC medicines and other household stuff as needs or wants? I mean, right now I seem to be buying a lot of Tums...the heartburn is always there. So am I wrong to say it's a need right now? I sure hope I won't need them after I have this little one! And we also buy paper products...plates, spoons, forks...not so much paper towels. But I really don't feel like standing and doing dishes for hours. And with a huge family that is what I would be doing! Dishwashers are nice...but not for this house. I would have to redo the kitchen! lol So not in the budget this year.

Are there rules as to what is a need or want? I mean soon we will be buying diapers/wipes and if you don't have a baby in your house that would be useless but....oh dear...I'm getting confused...lol.

Ok to start...I will track. And then we will see. Maybe this month I should just track what I am getting? LOL That seems so unfair. I'm on a medical leave due to the pregnancy. I am not going shopping for anything. I will see if I "ask" for anything that isn't needed.

Wow. This is going to be an eye opener isn't? Because, really what is a want and what is a need? Hmmm.

[shanendoah]

Welcome momof5. Here's what I say about wants and needs- don't worry about those yet. While you want to get some money saved up for the baby stuff, it doesn't sound like you're having any budget issues. For this first month especially, I would track where all dollars go. This just allows you to have a clear picture of where all your money is going. It also lets you know how much of your money is being spent on necessary items. (And yes, groceries, gas, meds are all necessary.) But you still might be spending more on those items than needed. Can you get a generic antacid pill for cheaper than Tums, for example?
Personally, for my controlled vs uncontrolled spending, I go by whether there was a plan to spend money or not, and if its in budget or not. My budget includes eating out, fun money for DH and I, etc. If I know at least 2 days in advance that we're going to be spending the money, and its in budget, its a controlled spend. (We grocery shop every weekend, so that's planned. As long as we don't gov over budget, its always controlled.) If we're planning dinner out with friends, controlled, but if we decide we're too lazy to cook and go out to eat, its uncontrolled, regardless of whether or not we're still in budget, because the spending wasn't planned.
That includes our fun money, if we're spending out of the account. I keep a spreadsheet to track our allowance spending. However, if DH takes cash out, its only counted on the day it comes from the account, not when he spends it.
Right now, I'm only tracking No Spend days because that's where we need to improve. For me, a No Spend day is a day when neither DH nor I used the debit card or a credit card, and I don't spend change on the vending machines. Since all of our bills are on auto-pay, a no spend day can be a day a bill is paid.

Hope that helps. And yes, the first few months are generally eye openers

[shanendoah]

Good thoughts for dakota and family.

[mizbear]

momof5- I do not count what is already budgeted in my CS, NS (controlled spend, no spend days)- that would be my rent, utilities, gas, meds, cell phone, layways (when I have them), insurances, and tuition bill. And I allot myself $10 for Starbucks so I don't go bananas. I also budget my savings.
Anything else I spend that is not put on that month's budget I count against my CS/NS total. But I am also on a very very fixed income right now and can almost tell you to the penny what my bills will be every month.
On the paper product issue. With 7 of you, would you have room for a portable full size dishwasher that you could roll out of the way when not in use? We bought one for my grandmother's house several years ago for less than $300 during a great sale at Lowe's- full size too. It would quickly pay for itself in paper product use. And would definitely make life easier.

[ses]

Momof5--breathe! This is a long and involved process. You won't have it all fall in place perfectly just because you say you want to do this. If only it were that easy!

All of us have fallen off the wagon many times and have to crawl back on when it circles back (Our driver must be constantly dizzy) I have been on this board over three years, two of them before I got this budget thing under control. I remain here for the motivation and these people are my friends.

You have made the first big step by joining us and wanting to take on this project. When you get discouraged or frazzled go back to page one and read Honey's description of what things are all about. The beauty of our thread is you make your own rules, something that will work for you and your family.

I would suggest before you start worrying about what is a want or a need take a month and write down everything you spend. I was really surprised when I did this. You might jot down DH's purchases in a different color ink when you know about it--but don't bug him about it.

How old are your kids? Are they old enough to understand money? Start with them, talk about what is a want or a need. Do it consistently enough and they will buy into the program without realizing it. Once they are on board, being children they will try to bring dad into the game.

I will give you a heads up that eventually you will go shopping and some, or all, of us will pop up in your head asking, "Is that a want or a need?"

You might want to read Dave Ramsey's book Total Money Makeover, or some of the books by Suze Orman or David Bach. You might want to leave them out where DH can just happen to see them or even pick one up and read a bit.

Shanen and Moneysquirrel got me using Excel for my record keeping last January and I am already hooked. It is so easy to see my problem areas. When you start to see your problems ask for suggestions. The ladies here (we had a guy for about a month once) are great at suggesting possible solutions or just talking it out.

ETA--I forgot to mention, some days this thread goes like lightening, just hang on and enjoy the ride!

[muttleynfelix]

momof5 - OTC meds are certainly needs. As for paper products, you are not the only person in your house. Which means you are not the only person who has to do dishes. In fact, if you cook, you don't have to do dishes. Your kids are certainly old enough to help do dishes (and do laundry). Growing up before we had a dish washer, my sister washed dishes, my brother rinsed and I dried (and my dad put everything up). This was from the time I was 4 or 5 until my sister went to college and my parents got a dish washer. Definately track where your money goes. That is the biggest thing. I look at each category most months at the end of the month to see how we did.