tloonya
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Post by tloonya on Jun 13, 2014 17:33:20 GMT -5
My Ma is turning 70 on 22d.
We aren't going to celebrate but I would like to DO something nice. Out of the box.
We used to order huge baskets of gorgeous flowers but a few years ago she saidshe feels they smell like a funeral home in a few days so we stopped.
She loves big cats, maybe I can get her a baby tiger? No! If she will move with me I will have to feed him my DH...and Ia planning on using him for a while for other then animal food purposes.
What can I shock her with without giving her another (cordioligist promised) heart attack?
DHs father got a stripper for his 70th BDay. Still dreaming about her...everyone got her phone. She was gorgeous. I am still remembering it... He actually called a few days ago asking for a tape copy because his wasbroken....wonderiing why? So jokes aside. WHAT can I do for my Ma without money and time? None of it have I...She loves big cats, casino, cognac, sigarettes and cooking but she knows what tocook so cook book is OUT of questions. ANYONE?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 13, 2014 17:36:51 GMT -5
My friend had her 50th birthday at a venue with other birthdays. She ordered a magician, but unfortunately for her and her guests, the majority of the other "birthday girls / boys" ordered strippers. The venue included a person to watch any kids outside during the stripping acts, since they weren't allowed to stay in the venue during those acts. Those poor kids were all dressed up, and standing outside with this guy in the freezing cold. It was AWFUL!
I seriously can't think of ANYTHING tackier or more low-class. My friend was absolutely mortified. Instead of sending thank you cards, she send apology cards.
We have a friend who does a big birthday gig every year or every two years. He's had: a magician, a private band, an artist who paints a painting of the "birthday boy / girl" to commemorate the evening, and a belly dancer.
The magician and the band were the best.
What about an experience instead? A weekend somewhere, or a hot-air balloon ride, or a helicopter ride?
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tloonya
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Post by tloonya on Jun 13, 2014 17:55:33 GMT -5
debt, I am seriously laughing right now because I am sure that prudes who thinks strippers are low class are capable of greater sins. They are just putting on WHEW faces and acting like 'normal' people but deep inside they are soooooooooo wanting this girl on their faces. My FIL said she smelled so good he almost fainted from memories...it was waaay before Viagra.
I do not believe in saints among us crap. We all have our skeletons in a closets. Some more dressed up than others. But still...they are hidden. So do not give me this crap! This country built on strong families, sex and drugs. And it is wonderful! 
Sooo...I can't think of anything more stupid tham magicians...do you know when that animal disappeared in the box - it is killed by the inner piece of wood inside of the friggin box? No? So there you go...they are more sinful than honest pretty stripper who does no harm to anyone. And those clown faces...common! Do you want to see it in your dream or nice girl on a pole? Thanks for your input, maaam. |
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Regis
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Post by Regis on Jun 13, 2014 18:22:25 GMT -5
Hypnotist.
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tloonya
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Post by tloonya on Jun 13, 2014 18:31:17 GMT -5
So she is thinking she is a magician or a stripper? |
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mamasita99
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Post by mamasita99 on Jun 13, 2014 19:14:24 GMT -5
I'm thinking of a young, hunky guy in swim trunks, who will clean the house for her for the afternoon.
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tloonya
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Post by tloonya on Jun 14, 2014 5:07:39 GMT -5
I'm thinking of a young, hunky guy in swim trunks, who will clean the house for her for the afternoon. WOW! That's WOW! |
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 14, 2014 10:14:46 GMT -5
My Ma is turning 70 on 22d. We aren't going to celebrate but I would like to DO something nice. Out of the box. What can I shock her with without giving her another (cordioligist promised) heart attack? WHAT can I do for my Ma without money and time? None of it have I...She loves big cats, casino, cognac, sigarettes and cooking but she knows what tocook so cook book is OUT of questions. ANYONE? Is your ma an immigrant? Is there something traditional in her country that she misses? No money and no time makes it very hard! Would she like a poker night with her friends at your house? You, DH, DD set up a buffet and act as servers to them (towels over your arms and everything) to make it special. If she is traditional European I do not think she will like strippers or clowns or magicians. She will think that is a waste of money. |
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 14, 2014 10:34:30 GMT -5
You say your mom likes casinos...if you want to spend a few thousand, you can rent a ballroom at a local hotel and they can turn it into a casino for you. They'll set up some gaming tables, roulette wheel, etc. and create a casino atmosphere but it will be a private party with just your guests. Or she could buy her a carton of cigarettes, $100, and a bus pass to the casino. |
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Nazgul Girl
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Post by Nazgul Girl on Jun 14, 2014 16:38:21 GMT -5
I vote for the hot male housecleaner in shorts. Our next door neighbor uses a Mr. Muscles guy who cleans houses, according to the signs on his truck.
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tloonya
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Post by tloonya on Jun 15, 2014 10:13:03 GMT -5
Mom drives herself and BF to casino, so no need helping here. Casino had already sent her $100 to waste and free dinner which she is not going to eat anyway. Housecleaning hunk was good idea because we forgot BF. He can see yet... So...I left without options...again.
And when I said we do not celebrate - it means there is going to be no hotels pretending to be a casino or other bullshit. No celebration! Period, MM. |
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tloonya
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Post by tloonya on Jun 15, 2014 10:18:23 GMT -5
My Ma is turning 70 on 22d. We aren't going to celebrate but I would like to DO something nice. Out of the box. What can I shock her with without giving her another (cordioligist promised) heart attack? WHAT can I do for my Ma without money and time? None of it have I...She loves big cats, casino, cognac, sigarettes and cooking but she knows what tocook so cook book is OUT of questions. ANYONE? Is your ma an immigrant? Is there something traditional in her country that she misses? No money and no time makes it very hard! Would she like a poker night with her friends at your house? You, DH, DD set up a buffet and act as servers to them (towels over your arms and everything) to make it special. If she is traditional European I do not think she will like strippers or clowns or magicians. She will think that is a waste of money. No, Mom misses nothing. She is sentiment-free gal. Who said no money? They have money...what no time? They friggin retired... Poker with friends?  Mom plays cards with BF and she doesn't have no friends. I mean she does have a few old friends but she doesn't care. She always saya 'want to give me a gift - leave me alone'...she is funny. Talking to me on a phone and casino trip and shopping and cooking - her life. She would probably laugh at the stripper and cut his act short because she needs to do something...like I said - no sentiments. If it wasn't a round date - I wouldn't sweat it.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 15, 2014 11:35:26 GMT -5
WHAT can I do for my Ma without money and time? None of it have I... YOU said you had no money or time. Try to keep track of your own lies once in a while. |
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achelois
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Post by achelois on Jun 15, 2014 11:40:09 GMT -5
I'm thinking of a young, hunky guy in swim trunks, who will clean the house for her for the afternoon. Yeah, but where can you find a guy who cleans? If I could find a guy who cleans, I wouldn't care what he was wearing. There is, apparently, no Mr muscles in my area. I just googled.  There is a Rent-a-spouse service and I had a guy come out and put in a ceiling fan for me and shutters on my house and power wash it this year. That was nice, but he didn't wear swim trunks. I used to take my Mom to an old-fashioned, 1890s decor ice cream parlor because that was what she liked, but none of the women in my family are high-maintenance. |
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tloonya
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Post by tloonya on Jun 16, 2014 8:49:26 GMT -5
WHAT can I do for my Ma without money and time? None of it have I... YOU said you had no money or time. Try to keep track of your own lies once in a while. Now, I had missed that you referring to my money. I thought you were talking about mom's. Would you mined keeping track of my lies because like I said I do not have time. Thanks |
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greeniis10
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Post by greeniis10 on Jun 16, 2014 12:31:07 GMT -5
Spa day? Does she like massages or pedicures/manicures or a shampoo and hairstyle? Doesn't mean she has to change her hair. Sometimes having it shampooed and styled by someone else is a luxury. Personal preference, though.
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tloonya
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Post by tloonya on Jun 16, 2014 12:41:03 GMT -5
Spa day? Does she like massages or pedicures/manicures or a shampoo and hairstyle? Doesn't mean she has to change her hair. Sometimes having it shampooed and styled by someone else is a luxury. Personal preference, though. She would love that. It will break my 'I have no money' rule. Its about $200. Plus no one can sit with BF for so long...1 hour top or take him with.  |
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