Dear goodness, I am the most ungrateful wretch of a wife.

[Knee Deep in Water Chloe]

I am extremely overwhelmed with work right now. It's partly because it's "just that time of year" and partly because I also decided to take a post-graduate class that will count towards my  licensure's professional development requirements and my doctorate. 

I am incredibly spoiled by my husband. He really does a fantastic job taking care of me. 
We have two kids and a dog, and we both work 50+ hours per week. Between the two of us, we can keep up with the daily straightening, laundry, meals, and most of the deep cleaning. Our house has 1500sf of hardwood floors. I sweep at least three times per week, and while I want to mop every Sunday the reality is it's just been every other Sunday for the past 12 months. It takes me at 1.5 hours to sweep and mop to do a decent job. It takes me 2 - 2.5 hours to do a good to fantastic job. 

My husband finally cajoled me into hiring a someone to do the floors. If that's done, I believe I can keep up on all of the other deep cleaning. We finally found someone, and DH met with her this morning. I thought it was an initial meeting/interview type of thing. It turns out, he had her clean the floors and that she'll be here the first and third Thursdays of every month. When he told me that, I got incredibly annoyed. I told him I had just mopped them on Sunday!!! And that I don't know what the "rules" are. And that I don't know how this works. I realized what I was doing about after a version those three sentences came out of my mouth. Here, my husband is trying to take care of me, and I'm an ungrateful wretch who snaps at him. I immediately apologized. I texted him an apology and told him how appreciative I am that he set this up a little while after the phone call. I've apologized again when I got home. I told him how good the floors look when I got home. (They really do; she got under the furniture that takes me that extra half hour I don't have.)

WTF is wrong with me 

Please tell me both that I'm horrible and that I can still become a better person/wife. 

[ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ]

You're probably just ticked that he didn't discuss it with you first before hiring her.

Be grateful instead - she's going to take those "hours" of cleaning the floors off your already-busy schedule.

Let it slide - and give him a kiss for thinking of you.

[Knee Deep in Water Chloe]

May 2, 2014 0:31:39 GMT -5 @missmargarita said:

I'm having trouble wrapping my head around the fact it takes you an hour and a half to sweep and mop the floors in 1500 sq ft. We have 2200 sq ft and about 1300 sq ft of that is tile... I can sweep and mop in 30 min or less.... I'm clearly doing something wrong...

Oh, it could be me who is doing wrong. I don't know if it's that we're just dirty people or I'm just not good at it or I get to nit-picky about it. Sweeping super fast, takes me 40 minutes and mopping takes me about 30 minutes if I go super fast. It's when I want to get to under stuff or actually move tables and couches that I get to two hours. 

[achelois]

Ok, Chloe, you are a terrible person. 

But you are going to have VERY clean floors!

How nice of your husband to actually go ahead and hire someone to do it rather than just telling you to hire someone and forgetting about it, which I think most husbands would have done. (At least, that is what most of MY husbands would have done). 

There is hope for you yet, though.

[achelois]

May 2, 2014 0:33:25 GMT -5 @missmargarita said:

And you're not horrible... I don't like people in my house if I'm not expecting them... I may have left underwear on the floor!

You have underwear?  Have you considered going commando and investing the money you would have spent (wasted) on underwear. 

[Deleted]

I can't get past the sweep 3 times per week.....you must have seriously high standards.  My floors get done every other week when my cleaning person is here and I will spot sweep in between if necessary (something spills or I see a large hairball). I'm also surprised that your DH found someone to take a job for 2 hours, 2 days a month.  Why not just hire her for the whole house and save yourself a whole lot more hours?

[The Captain]

*Chuckle*  you sound like me in the early years of our marriage.  Let me guess, Hyper Type A?

Oh my, yes you are horrible for getting upset at DH wanted to help get things taken care of.  In fact you need to go pick a big fight with him over it.  Then you get to make up...

I'm gonna guess your floors are a darker color and EVERYTHING shows?  It looks fantastic when it's spotless, but man I couldn't keep up with it.

That's why my floors will be a lighter color rather than the dark stain I'd prefer.

[The Captain]

May 2, 2014 3:56:21 GMT -5 @singlemominmd said:

I can't get past the sweep 3 times per week.....you must have seriously high standards.  My floors get done every other week when my cleaning person is here and I will spot sweep in between if necessary (something spills or I see a large hairball). I'm also surprised that your DH found someone to take a job for 2 hours, 2 days a month.  Why not just hire her for the whole house and save yourself a whole lot more hours?

Soooo  !!!  Hiring a cleaning lady to come every other week was one of the best things we ever did for our relationship!

[Deleted]

Last week DH went out and bought a camera for DS and DDIL; we're driving up tonight to see our new grandchild for the first time and up to that point DS was just snapping pictures with his phone. We'd agreed on the purchase, but when I got home from work, DH had opened the pack, done whatever assembly was needed, charged up the battery and made sure it worked. I came home from another stressful day at the office and got all hyper about what would happen if it turned out DS had gone and bought a camera and we needed to return it. DH gently reminded me I was getting a little crazy. And I e-mailed DS and told home we had gotten them a camera and no he doesn't have one yet.

Reasonable people understand that sometimes people who are stressed out don't always behave perfectly- and reasonable people under stress may rant a bit too much, or get upset about things that wouldn't ordinarily disturb them, but they don't resort to punching fists in walls or taking it out on their loved ones.

Sounds like you're two normal people.

[mmhmm]

Aww, Chloe, no!  Cut yourself  some slack, girl!  We say and do all sorts of things when we're stressed, and most of us understand that.  You've tried so hard to be perfect when that's not possible for anybody.  I'm sure your DH understands that.  After all, he understood you need some help, didn't he?

Not to worry.  You're going to love having the floors done so you can concentrate on the more important things, like spending free time together.  Hugs, hon!    

[NancysSummerSip]

Aw, Chloe, you're fine. Just overworked and overstressed. And so used to being both, that when something in your schedule changes, it throws you off and freaks you out. My DH is retired, and when he stepped up and started helping out more (since he had the time), I thought it was an insult, like I wasn't doing a good enough job.

I was, and I still am. Oh, and all my floors, if I cleaned them all at once (2,300 sq ft., a mix of hardwood, carpet and tile) would take about two hours, for a deep cleaning.). I break it up so the task isn't so huge.

[tloonya]

May 2, 2014 0:31:39 GMT -5 @missmargarita said:

I'm having trouble wrapping my head around the fact it takes you an hour and a half to sweep and mop the floors in 1500 sq ft. We have 2200 sq ft and about 1300 sq ft of that is tile... I can sweep and mop in 30 min or less.... I'm clearly doing something wrong...

No, MM, Cloe is like my mother. She can clean tiny bathroom for hours. She gets into every hole with toothpick.
I am always annoyed but this because NO NE CAN SEE THAT corner or whatever under the bed or behind that sink.
I clean the whole house between my favorite shows. It takes a whole day but...

[tloonya]

May 2, 2014 0:33:25 GMT -5 @missmargarita said:

And you're not horrible... I don't like people in my house if I'm not expecting them... I may have left underwear on the floor!

Like on the living room floor?  I am sure no one is running into your bedroom right after you had opened door for them. But I'll never know, will I?

[Phoenix84]

Underwater Chloe

There, feel better?

The good news is you can mend your ways so we don't have to have this talk again.

[greeniis10]

Chloe, good job on recognizing your error right away and fixing it!  Don't beat yourself up.  We all do this type of thing. 

Regarding the floors, you sound like youngest DS: he has dark wood floors, two large dogs and a yet-to-be-landscaped backyard.  He struggles to keep the floors looking decent.  I think he's spent a small fortune on Swiffer pads!  It's a never-ending job so I'm glad to hear you have some help with yours now.  Good to hear your husband was so proactive about it, too!

[Knee Deep in Water Chloe]

May 2, 2014 11:07:15 GMT -5 tloonya said:

May 2, 2014 0:31:39 GMT -5 @missmargarita said:

I'm having trouble wrapping my head around the fact it takes you an hour and a half to sweep and mop the floors in 1500 sq ft. We have 2200 sq ft and about 1300 sq ft of that is tile... I can sweep and mop in 30 min or less.... I'm clearly doing something wrong...

No, MM, Cloe is like my mother. She can clean tiny bathroom for hours. She gets into every hole with toothpick.
I am always annoyed but this because NO NE CAN SEE THAT corner or whatever under the bed or behind that sink.
I clean the whole house between my favorite shows. It takes a whole day but...

What!!! No way! I don't even know what you're talking about. 

[Knee Deep in Water Chloe]

May 2, 2014 11:09:56 GMT -5 Phoenix84 said:

Underwater Chloe

There, feel better?

The good news is you can mend your ways so we don't have to have this talk again.

Thank you. I'll try harder. 

[Knee Deep in Water Chloe]

May 2, 2014 11:20:33 GMT -5 greeniis10 said:

Chloe, good job on recognizing your error right away and fixing it!  Don't beat yourself up.  We all do this type of thing. 

Regarding the floors, you sound like youngest DS: he has dark wood floors, two large dogs and a yet-to-be-landscaped backyard.  He struggles to keep the floors looking decent.  I think he's spent a small fortune on Swiffer pads!  It's a never-ending job so I'm glad to hear you have some help with yours now.  Good to hear your husband was so proactive about it, too!

Thanks! Lots of swiffer pads!
I'm thinking about getting a roomba. Has your son tried one of those?

[Knee Deep in Water Chloe]

May 2, 2014 9:05:46 GMT -5 NancysSummerSip said:

 I thought it was an insult, like I wasn't doing a good enough job.

Oh, so much that!!! I really have to find my center to realize that's not what he's saying. And I don't mean just with this situation, but in general with life. Uggh! Glad I'm not alone! Thanks!

[justme]

I'm single and would love for someone to hire someone to clean my floors!!! Any takers??

(The underlying comment is those that have kids shouldn't feel bad for hiring someone when a single person wants to. Not that a single person should. Or someone that's married. Have I covered the basis? Oh wait, forgot it's still YM, someone with footstamps shouldn't hire someone to clean. )