Client's Daughter's Graduation Party

[Iggy aka IG]

This is a new one on me:  I've been invited to a client's daughter's high school graduation party.  (Facebook invite, via her grandma mom, co-hosted by grandma.)  I've known the family for 11 years, via business and the chamber, but never have socialized with them.

If it were you, would you go, and what, if anything would you give as a gift?  

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

If I don't know them socially I wouldn't go and I wouldn't give a gift.

[tloonya]

Apr 23, 2014 12:49:50 GMT -5 Iggy aka IG said:

This is a new one on me:  I've been invited to a client's daughter's high school graduation party.  (Facebook invite, via her grandma.)  I've known the family for 11 years, via business and the chamber, but never have socialized with them.

If it were you, would you go, and what, if anything would you give as a gift?  

If it is an important client - go have some piece of BBQ and bring an envelope with good wishes for her future. I say $50-$100 depends on importance of your relationships with a client.
If client is just whatev...heck no! Stay home and have your own BBQ!

[tloonya]

Apr 23, 2014 12:53:01 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

If I don't know them socially I wouldn't go and I wouldn't give a gift.

If this client brings him $$$ monthly - it is unwise to ignore his invitation.
Some people makes a lot of dough by inviting anyone and everyone to kid's grad parties.
I had heard a few thousand dollars 'so she can live on' while getting used to new life in college.
The funnies was the one when kid had NO idea those were blood relatives, uncles, aunts and cousins...

[Deleted]

I would go. Don't stay long. Bring something conservative as a gift.

[sheilaincali]

We (myself or my folks) get invited to graduation parties for the children of customers.  If it's someone that has been a loyal customer for years we go and give them a card and some $$.  In some cases we vaguely know the kid - if he or she comes in with their dad or stops by to pick up an order. 
This is typically done via a formal invitation.  My cousin sent out "save the dates" via facebook and my aunts are not amused.

[Cookies Galore]

Was it a blanket, invite everyone on their friends list invite?

[Iggy aka IG]

Apr 23, 2014 14:09:47 GMT -5 Cookies Galore said:

Was it a blanket, invite everyone on their friends list invite?

No. 

[Cookies Galore]

Apr 23, 2014 14:38:10 GMT -5 Iggy aka IG said:

Apr 23, 2014 14:09:47 GMT -5 Cookies Galore said:

Was it a blanket, invite everyone on their friends list invite?

No. 

Well my advice was going to be ignore it since grandma doesn't know what she's doing! :-)

[Iggy aka IG]

Apr 23, 2014 14:48:11 GMT -5 Cookies Galore said:

Apr 23, 2014 14:38:10 GMT -5 Iggy aka IG said:

No. 

Well my advice was going to be ignore it since grandma doesn't know what she's doing! :-)

LOL!  I thought about that, too.    I double checked the FB invite, and revised my OP.  Mom invited ppl, grandma is co-hosting, which makes more sense since I know mom.

[NastyWoman]

I think Sheila and loony are right on: show your face (if you can make it) give a card with either some token amount of money or a giftcard inside.  If you don't have time -> just send the card w. giftcard inside. That is providedthat  the last name of this family is not Duggar of course in which case a card should be plenty



ETA: the name Duggar is used generically in this post and the advice applies to all humonguous families.

[Malarky]

ETA: the name Duggar is used generically in this post and the advice applies to all humonguous families.

[Iggy aka IG]

Apr 23, 2014 15:42:19 GMT -5 Malarky said:

ETA: the name Duggar is used generically in this post and the advice applies to all humonguous families.

[Sam_2.0]

Poor kids from humongous familes.



DH gets these from time to time. Invites to weddings and graduations from clients/business associates. I stock up on $1 cards (Dollar General & Walmart actually have some decent ones in that range), and then send our best regards along with some cash or a gift card to where they are registered. We just consider it a non-deductible business expense and go on with our day.

[Shooby]

Do you want to socialize with them on some level? If you do, then go. You can have friends that are clients, etc. However, if you don't and want to maintain that distance, then I would just send a card and small gift like $25 or something. Just chalk it off as the cost of doing business.

[skubikky]

Especially if it was a FB invite I would say take a pass.
I make it a rule to keep business clients and personal activities separate.
A gift is not owed in this case.

[Shooby]

A gift isn't "owed". However it is never wrong to give a gift. So, if you think you are going to worry about whether you should have or not, then just send a gift and be done with it and save yourself the trouble of worrying about it. I just find that when I am not sure, I would rather just err on the side of sending a gift and that appeases my mind and the small price of the gift is less of a stressor than wondering after the fact if I made the right decision.

[Shooby]

When I was a twentysomething, one of my coworkers, whom I did not know in personal way other than at work invited me to her son's wedding. Well, I really didn't see the point. I never met her son and I didn't know her in any social way. So, I sent a wedding card and no gift. Well, then at work she came to personally thank me for the lovely CARD in a very sarcastic tone. And, I was pretty much oblivious so I didn't pick up on her sarcasm, lol.
But, WHY would I want to go the wedding of her son whom I never met of a person whom I have never socially interacted with other than to happen to work in the same room for a couple of months? lol

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

But, WHY would I want to go the wedding of her son whom I never met of a person whom I have never socially interacted with other than to happen to work in the same room for a couple of months

Money grab. They gotta pay back those credit card bills for the wedding somehow. Hence the sarcasm about the empty card.

[alabamagal]

I would send a card if you want to. Personally, I do not want to go to a graduation party or wedding for a person I don't know.  If I had met the kid more than once, and the kid knew my face, then I would probably show up.

I posted before about getting a wedding invite for pastor's daughter's wedding.  We no longer go to the church (not fo last 2 years) but are still on their member list. I declined. I have never even spoken to the daughter and would not recognizer her if I saw her outside of church.  No card or gift either.

[Nazgul Girl]

   I don't like outdoor graduation parties in particular, so if it's a good client of yours, I would send a card with a $ 25 gift card.   I don't think that non-family gifts for H.S. graduates need to be more.   If it's not someone even at that level, I would decline, citing previous obligations and forget about the gift or card.  

[Iggy aka IG]

Apr 24, 2014 9:27:57 GMT -5 alabamagal said:

I would send a card if you want to. Personally, I do not want to go to a graduation party or wedding for a person I don't know.  If I had met the kid more than once, and the kid knew my face, then I would probably show up.

This is the situation.  I've known the girl (and her sister) since they were little.  It's a small community, so we run into each other at the grocery store, etc.

[sesfw]

send a card and small gift like $25

I would do this much to keep the client happy.

I would also make other plans for that time frame.

[alabamagal]

Apr 24, 2014 10:47:47 GMT -5 Iggy aka IG said:

Apr 24, 2014 9:27:57 GMT -5 alabamagal said:

I would send a card if you want to. Personally, I do not want to go to a graduation party or wedding for a person I don't know.  If I had met the kid more than once, and the kid knew my face, then I would probably show up.

This is the situation.  I've known the girl (and her sister) since they were little.  It's a small community, so we run into each other at the grocery store, etc.

I would go then.  $25 check and card

I just don't want to go to a party where it is the first time you have met the graduate.

[tloonya]

Apr 24, 2014 6:12:04 GMT -5 Shooby said:

Do you want to socialize with them on some level? If you do, then go. You can have friends that are clients, etc. However, if you don't and want to maintain that distance, then I would just send a card and small gift like $25 or something. Just chalk it off as the cost of doing business.

They ARE socializing on a business level!
If I was someone's client and I was considering my self a good client I would be pretty pissed off (not me personally, I wouldn't give a damn) that person whom I am bringing shitload of my business ignored my child's party...and me.