WYP? i.e. What's Your Problem?

[Opti]

In this evolving world,we are supposed to ask WIFT(What's In It for Them)
or 'What Would Jesus Do?' or something similar. In spite of that, many people
still use spin to make it the other person's problem.

Its my belief, that on any side of a conversation both people need to step
back sometimes and say to themselves "What's MY Problem?" with whatever
I hear? Many reactions are knee jerk and people go off well down trodden
tracks.

I started this thread in part because I believe YMers in their desire to solve
people, or be right, are now appraching 100% failure rates when responding to
certain posters. For example, Doxie started a thread about something ... and the
first out of the box post was 100% fail IMO. I am pretty sure Maryland must have
experienced the unusually bright sun several days in a row like NJ did. In astrology
terms we may have had a sun eclipse roughly starting around 11:30AM this past
Tuesday in central NJ. (I know that raises more questions than it answers except for
the rare few who actually track the sun, mooon and stars movements.)

[Opti]

FWIW, I figured out some things about my workplace based on the above.

The current building manager for example, does seem to always miss
the schedule updates on the managers covering off hours duty sheets,
because he is the one working out of hours(before 8AM and after 8PM) as
needed when things go wrong like big snow storms, construction takes out
a generator, etc. Its made worse by the fact that our current administrator
has chosen to only work M-F unless extreme events dictate otherwise.



So her ass umptions are based on what she believes should work on
off hours or weekends even though she's never actually worked a normal
one since she started there approximately Labor Day 2013.


Funny how working crappy hours during storms etc. every day until needed
would be a very different experience from confining the occasional issue to M-F
or the extreme 'everyone necessary sleeps at the building' until travel is passable
for most of the facilities workers. (Hopefully all for now. My own RL issues started
the very first day of February, day 4 of my scheduled 12 days in a row. Feb 4th
was the start of the Sun eclipse ...   ... )

[Nazgul Girl]

   As a person who was married to someone who had a heavy dependence on ceremonial magick, ( it's a long story for readers who don't know what that is ), the kabala/tree of life, and the other aspects of the occult to give him all of the answers during the last several years of our relationship, I would honestly urge you to step back and ask, " What's my problem ? "  

   As a person who had to deal with someone obsessed with the occult which grew from just an interest, I would urge you to try to spend your time dealing with issues in a practical manner.  

   I am not downing your belief system by any means, but  the administrator does have the right to a M-F schedule, and the part-time workers are expected to work the off-shifts.   I spent quite awhile working at a nursing home myself.  

   Also, it is best to be cautious when getting angry with others, for you do not know their skill level in certain things if you feel like going that way.  

[Miss Tequila]

My problem is that I don't understand the OP.....

Opti, I have said it once and I will say it again. You are having one hell if a time finding a job that you say you are qualified for. Every post you make (or a large percentage of them) is about how people don't know how to do their jobs. How people hiring just don't understand what they really need. How your manager (I "think" that is what your OP was about) doesn't know how to schedule. So on and so on....maybe you should be asking yourself "what's my problem " and resolve it because I really believe it is why you are underemployed.

[swamp]

I thought the perk of being an administrator was to work m-f? 

[Miss Tequila]

Feb 9, 2014 9:05:41 GMT -5 swamp said:

I thought the perk of being an administrator was to work m-f? 

Stop using logic....

[midjd]

I started this thread in part because I believe YMers in their desire to solve
people, or be right, are now appraching 100% failure rates when responding to
certain posters. For example, Doxie started a thread about something ... and the
first out of the box post was 100% fail IMO.

I know you used Doxie as an example, but I see what you're getting at... we have somehow failed you in responding to your posts/threads.

I wish you no ill will and would be delighted if you proved all of us wrong. But you seem to be focusing your efforts (which you've admitted are limited, as you're not a "high energy" person) in all the wrong areas. Surely the amount of time you've spent tracking the sun/moon patterns and posting random and often indecipherable messages here could be used to at least get a start on a targeted resume?

[Knee Deep in Water Chloe]

It's read the OP three times, and I'm still not understanding how the last paragraph connects to the first portion of it. 

For the past five years or so, I've strived to practice "seek first to understand". Is that similar to what you're referring? 

[raeoflyte]

Opti, your posts seem to have really changed. I have a very hard time following your train of thought and when I've asked for clarification you haven't responded. I do follow astrology but I'm still not following your post...

Are you ok? You've mentioned mental health issues in the past and I've wondered if you're situation or meds have changed? I don't know you, but I have worried about you and really do hope for the best.

Sent from my ADR6410LVW using proboards

[8 Bit WWBG]

While I do think the "what can *I* do" and "no blame, just solutions" type of thinking is very healthy and useful; I think there are some times it is just plain the other person's fault.  Its not that I'm not willing to take on action myself, or try to help.  Its that sometimes, the other person shouldn't get off scot free under the "lets just move past that and fix the problem" defense.

I read a cute little book about asking the right questions.  Statements like "when will management actually SUPPORT us" or "when will our systems WORK" don't help very much.  However; choosing not to address those issues overlooks the fact that sometimes management DOESN'T support you, or the systems DON'T work.  I do believe in doing one's best to work with what one has; but sometimes what one has is just plain not enough to do what is asked.

As far as answering posts -- sometimes people want an answer that they know they aren't going to get from this crowd.  YM deals out tough love; and that is a strength.  Not everyone can take it; but those that can and do, often find themselves stronger as a result.  Its not easy to be told what you don't want to hear.

Also, remember, it can also be quite a lot of fun to feel superior to others, and point out as such.

[Cookies Galore]

Feb 9, 2014 12:53:13 GMT -5 raeoflyte said:

Opti, your posts seem to have really changed. I have a very hard time following your train of thought and when I've asked for clarification you haven't responded. I do follow astrology but I'm still not following your post...

Are you ok? You've mentioned mental health issues in the past and I've wondered if you're situation or meds have changed? I don't know you, but I have worried about you and really do hope for the best.

Sent from my ADR6410LVW using proboards

#yeahthat

[constanz22]

Feb 9, 2014 12:53:13 GMT -5 raeoflyte said:

Opti, your posts seem to have really changed. I have a very hard time following your train of thought and when I've asked for clarification you haven't responded. I do follow astrology but I'm still not following your post...

Are you ok? You've mentioned mental health issues in the past and I've wondered if you're situation or meds have changed? I don't know you, but I have worried about you and really do hope for the best.

Sent from my ADR6410LVW using proboards

I'm glad I'm not the only one.  I read it this morning and had NO idea what OP was talking about.  At first I thought maybe I just needed more coffee first

[Deleted]

If I understand the work situation (and it is more likely I don't) in this day of cell phones there is no reason for anyone to not receive schedule updates promptly no matter where they are. And the admin would be making schedules based on the availability of staff, budget considerations and feedback from those that do work the off shifts. I don't think you understand as much as you think you do.

[NoNamePerson]

WYP? i.e. What's Your Problem?

Well, since I didn't quite understand the OP either, I will just answer the subject line.

I don't have a problem  
 

[taz157]

Feb 9, 2014 12:53:13 GMT -5 raeoflyte said:

Opti, your posts seem to have really changed. I have a very hard time following your train of thought and when I've asked for clarification you haven't responded. I do follow astrology but I'm still not following your post...

Are you ok? You've mentioned mental health issues in the past and I've wondered if you're situation or meds have changed? I don't know you, but I have worried about you and really do hope for the best.

Yeah that.

[Nazgul Girl]

Feb 9, 2014 13:54:57 GMT -5 @tbird said:

No body can change anybody else, and in fact - no one can even impact anyone else unless that person is willing to be impacted (barring illegal type assault, etc)

The only thing any of us can ever do is negotiate ourselves in the situation in which we find ourselves. We can work to improve that situation or navigate our way out of it.

Finding the fault of others may be informative - but dwelling on how they need to fix themselves isn't a solution for us - because unless they are willing or wanting to change, they will not. Knowledge of their faults can only inform our actions within the situation to be more effective, or inform us of the necessity to navigate out of that situation.


YM isn't going to change it's tune. YM is YM and if it wasn't it wouldn't be YM.

Your boss/scheuduler isn't going to work off hours unless an emergency because they don't want to work off hours.

If you want anything to change, the only thing you can change is yourself and your own actions/reactions.

   Yes.   Yes.   Yes.   Looking to astrology can be fun and even at times, informative if you like that sort of thing, but not everyone 'obeys' the stars in their paths.    The trouble with " magick " is this:   even if we believe that there are such things as magical spells ( and I do, sometimes ), we have to act in our own lives in order to actuate them.  

   If you want things to change for the better in your life, you can't *only* look to the stars, or the cards, or whatever.  You have to make the changes that you need to make, in order to get a better job, get the things you need, etc.   You need to stop fighting those who don't even know you, and work on becoming agreeable when opportunity ( such as a job interview ) reaches out its hand.   It's fine to be metaphysical, but it has to be practical metaphysicism, if that makes sense.  

[Ava]

Opti;

I hope you answer my question. Do you have any family or close friends in the area where you live?
If not, do you have any family or close friends somewhere else? Maybe in another state?

I know how difficult it is to be on your own; I live alone and don't have any family here.
It's very challenging. A full-time work schedule and night school keep me going.
It would be very difficult to be on my own if I worked limited hours at a part-time job.

Do you have access to health care?

[NancysSummerSip]

Feb 9, 2014 8:49:24 GMT -5 Miss Tequila said:

My problem is that I don't understand the OP.....

Opti, I have said it once and I will say it again. You are having one hell if a time finding a job that you say you are qualified for. Every post you make (or a large percentage of them) is about how people don't know how to do their jobs. How people hiring just don't understand what they really need. How your manager (I "think" that is what your OP was about) doesn't know how to schedule. So on and so on....maybe you should be asking yourself "what's my problem " and resolve it because I really believe it is why you are underemployed.

Thanks, I thought it was just my tired brain.

I've worked around the clock when I worked in law enforcement. Days, nights, midnights, holidays, weekends. During severe weather, everyone, including management and top brass, were 10-100, meaning everyone stayed on duty, no one went home. It sucked. I missed out on a lot, which is why I found other employment. You do what you have to do when you are asked to do it, or you find other work.

[raeoflyte]

I wonder if Opti is coming back?  

FWIW I use these forums to help me look at how I come across, and how what I mean gets interpreted by others.  Which has helped me work with clients and coworkers.  

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

What does a solar eclipse have to do with anything?

 In general I find myself much happier when I'm in charge of my own destiny rather than letting random planets/stars determine my life.  

It's probably very easy to feel powerless when your life appears controlled by your astrological sign.   Maybe you'd be less depressed if you stopped charging the plaents with your fate and instead took control of your own life.

[whoisjohngalt]

I was trying soooo hard to understand OP, but you lost me at "Doxie started a thread".

[whoisjohngalt]

Feb 10, 2014 13:08:23 GMT -5 raeoflyte said:

I wonder if Opti is coming back?  

FWIW I use these forums to help me look at how I come across, and how what I mean gets interpreted by others.  Which has helped me work with clients and coworkers.  

You come off very nice.  ALWAYS!!  Even when you bitch I mean talk about your husband, you still come across very nice

[raeoflyte]

Feb 10, 2014 13:16:22 GMT -5 whoisjohngalt said:

Feb 10, 2014 13:08:23 GMT -5 raeoflyte said:

I wonder if Opti is coming back?  

FWIW I use these forums to help me look at how I come across, and how what I mean gets interpreted by others.  Which has helped me work with clients and coworkers.  

You come off very nice.  ALWAYS!!  Even when you bitch I mean talk about your husband, you still come across very nice

Yeah, my husband is damn lucky he ended up with me. And thanks!  

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

I think every field has a time where they work extra/longer shifts



I had to come in several nights in a row at 8 pm to innoculate at least 40 rats.  I've come in on weekends to culture bacteri and count plates.   I've come in early and worked late to get experiments done.

My bosses are not here when I do this.  Why?  Because they pay me to do it.  My bosses have earned the right to not have to come in during weird hours. 

I won't be paid for very long if I complain about off hours and insist they need to work them too.

[raeoflyte]

Feb 10, 2014 13:13:26 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

What does a solar eclipse have to do with anything?

 In general I find myself much happier when I'm in charge of my own destiny rather than letting random planets/stars determine my life.  

It's probably very easy to feel powerless when your life appears controlled by your astrological sign.   Maybe you'd be less depressed if you stopped charging the plaents with your fate and instead took control of your own life.

It's the same as any faith though.  It can be used to turn up your hands and say you are powerless, or a person can use it as a place to find understanding and personal strength and make empowered choices for themselves. 

[Deleted]

Your posts often make you sound flakey Opti.

 Maybe you come across that way in real life also which would not help you in a work environment to much.

Sorry if that hurts your feelings, but that's the way I see it.

[doxieluvr]

Feb 9, 2014 8:49:24 GMT -5 Miss Tequila said:

My problem is that I don't understand the Op d.

ditto... And I am mentioned in the op.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

It's the same as any faith though. It can be used to turn up your hands and say you are powerless, or a person can use it as a place to find understanding and personal strength and make empowered choices for themselves

True.  I know there is the phrase "God helps those that help themselves", I don't know if there is an eqivalent in astrology.

Either way blaming things on God or your horoscope isn't healthy.   We have the power, within reason, to control our own lives.   We can't control others, God or the stars.

[HoneyBBQ]

Add me to this list of those confuzzled.

[Rocky Mtn Saver]

Feb 10, 2014 16:16:13 GMT -5 HoneyBBQ said:

Add me to this list of those confuzzled.

Me three.  If Opti's communication skills here are any indication of her communication skills on interviews, this might explain a big part of why she's had trouble finding work.