How do you donate to your church?

[geenamercile]

Not to get into a religious debate but the short story is---  I am agnostic and my DH is baptist but doesn't go to any church.  Back in November ODD's friends invited her to go to to Sunday School with them, there is a bus that this church runs that picks all the kids up around 8:45 and drops them off at 1.  She is still going, enjoys it, and wants to go on the days her friends don't go.  I have gone, meet the people ect... So while I don't feel the need to go every Sunday we are okay with ODD doing this. While they are there, the church gives them breakfast, something along the lines of doughnuts, biscuits, bagels, juice ect... A snack and ODD normally comes home with some type of snack cake box or something.  

DH and I were talking, okay I was trying to get his opinion and just got do what you think is best   I am feeling like we should donate something to them, I just don't know how much.  Right now I'm leaning to a 100 dollars a month, but in someways that feels cheap when I think about how much 4 hours of babysitting would be, but then about right if I think about DDs share of gas for the bus, and how much she would eat.  But then I think I pay 150 in the summer for 6, hour long riding lesson for DD and it doesn't seem like a lot.  Maybe I'm just being stingy where I don't want to take more away from the fund for activities for the girls if I don't have too. Right now I would be pulling the money from the family fun money for this.      

So how much would you/do you give? 

[Deleted]

I think $100/month sounds plenty.

Disclaimer: i am not christian, i dont go to church, i dont really follow/believe in any organized religion. I believe in God and that's about it.

[NancysSummerSip]

I think the $100/month sounds like a good amount.

And I am glad your ODD likes going as much as you like it that she goes. The joy she gets from it has nothing to do with religion. And your donation doesn't either. It's about her sharing with friends and you caring enough to share what you have. Neither of those things has any religious affiliation.

[resolution]

The $100 a month seems more than enough to me, it is probably costing the church a lot less than that. I think it is nice of you to consider the expenses that the church incurs by picking her up and feeding her a snack, but the Sunday School teachers are probably all volunteers.

We give around $300 a month to our church, but we are members and fairly involved. I don't think anyone would expect a guest to be paying large amounts, and certainly not scaling it to day care prices.

[milee]

Geena, I've served on church boards (councils) and think that most churches would be happy with whatever you chose to give. If you can spare it, the $100 would be greatly appreciated. If you can't spare it, most churches would just be happy that your daughter is enjoying her time at church and that this is part of the ministry services that good churches provide.

IMHO, most churches aren't run like businesses, so although it's understandable and generous of you to think about the expense of the bus/supplies plus compare it to a comparable cost of child care, I don't think most churches would view it that way and be looking to charge like that.

[DVM gone riding]

SInce we beat churches to death on the tax thing, this is one of those charitable things that churches do that is hard to quantify and hard to measure in terms of cost. Most churches run in the red so I am sure your donation would be greatly appreciated but they aren't doing this to get money from the kids parents.

[geenamercile]

I know they are not doing it to get money, but I don't want to take advantage of them either.  I feel that she has been going long enough that she isn't really a "guest" anymore even if as a family we don't belong and I do feel like we need to give something.  

I will say the church my grandmother belonged too charges 25 dollars for Sunday school, which is another place I was using to come up with the number of 100. 

Thanks all.  

[Deleted]

I'm a church treasurer and some people who are in the pews give less than that so yes, it will be very much appreciated. I'm glad it's an activity your ODD enjoys and that you can help support it.

[Deleted]

Feb 1, 2014 18:06:39 GMT -5 geenamercile said:

I know they are not doing it to get money, but I don't want to take advantage of them either.  I feel that she has been going long enough that she isn't really a "guest" anymore even if as a family we don't belong and I do feel like we need to give something.  

I will say the church my grandmother belonged too charges 25 dollars for Sunday school, which is another place I was using to come up with the number of 100. 

Thanks all.  

Is it ok if I ask what denomination?  I can't imagine charging for Sunday School.

Give what you think is right.  If you itemize, you will get a tax deduction on it, by the way.  It's not a REASON to give, but a pleasant benefit every April.

[Knee Deep in Water Chloe]

I have never heard of a church charging for SS either. 

Just brainstorming:
10% of gross income is the biblical tithe. What would (1/number in your household) of your gross income and then 10% of that? For us, that would be $378/month.  Well, that's too much, but I don't what your household income is. 

[teen persuasion]

Our church charges for religious ed, mostly just to cover the costs of materials, books, etc.  It is about $30 per kid, per year, with a family max = two kids. If you sign up early they knock off a bit.

[Deleted]

I would give the amount I felt led to give if I were you, which is exactly what I do always. Giving generously is always my goal and happily so.   

[Sam_2.0]

DH and I are members at our church, and we try to give enough at minimum to cover our "expenses" of being members. Generic example: 300 members, monthly budget $30,000, we would give at least $300 (3 people in our family). I feel like it's a group we chose to be a part of, and part of that is paying for the building, pastor, etc. Some denominations break this out for members in a yearly budgeting meeting.

I think $100 would be very generous. You can probably direct your donation straight to the children's ministries department since that's where your DD is going. I know our church lets us direct funds or give to the general fund. That way you could at least feel like you were covering your DD's expenses and not sending funds to other things you may not agree with (if there is such an issue).

[Phoenix84]

I usually put a $20 in the collection plate every other time I go.  So averaging $10 every week I go, which is most weeks. 

It's not that much, but I figure I should at least be paying minimum wage for the hour and a half I'm there.  Everyone but the pastors are volunteers, but they still have rent and bills to pay.

Anyways, in your case, $100 a month for four hours per week doesn't sound too bad.  That's what I'd shoot for.

[bean29]

Churches teach social conciousness. I grew up doing religious ed in the Catholic church. The pedophile scandals broke about the time ds was in 2nd/3rd grade. Ds went to religious ed through sacrament of reconciliation and Dd through 1st communion. When I was a kid feeding the hungry was one of the church missions. As an adult I now realize that the inner city church that hosted that meal program feeds a lot of homeless/mentally ill people. Raising your kids in the church gives them a social consciousness that might be difficult to duplicate on your own.

I say give what you can afford/ are comfortable with.

[weecdngeer]

$100 a month is way more generous than I would be, but if your dd likes it and you are comfortable, it seems reasonable.

Honestly, I am a cheap sob and I do not put a lot of value on church activities personally... I would probably use a *cover the costs* mentality.