busymom
Distinguished Associate
Why is the rum always gone? Oh...that's why.
Joined: Dec 25, 2010 21:09:36 GMT -5
Posts: 29,225
Mini-Profile Background: {"image":"https://cdn.nickpic.host/images/IPauJ5.jpg","color":""}
Mini-Profile Name Color: 0D317F
Mini-Profile Text Color: 0D317F
|
Post by busymom on Sept 6, 2013 16:49:16 GMT -5
Stop hanging out with other Type A's. Really. Go visit the friends with the messy houses, & the kids with the dirty clothes. And invite them to your place when it is less than perfect. It took me YEARS to learn that. Once you have friends who don't require you to be "perfect", or who are constantly in competition with you to see who gets more done, you'll learn to relax.
|
|
HoneyBBQ
Junior Associate
Joined: Dec 27, 2010 10:36:09 GMT -5
Posts: 5,395
Mini-Profile Background: {"image":"","color":"3b444e"}
|
Post by HoneyBBQ on Sept 6, 2013 16:56:37 GMT -5
Stop hanging out with other Type A's. Really. Go visit the friends with the messy houses, & the kids with the dirty clothes. And invite them to your place when it is less than perfect. It took me YEARS to learn that. Once you have friends who don't require you to be "perfect", or who are constantly in competition with you to see who gets more done, you'll learn to relax. Honestly, my house is messy and dirty, too. LOL. I have 3 dogs and a kid, so it's never clean, and I have a propensity towards clutter, anyways. The things I CARE about have to be perfect, I don't care about having a house that is perfectly clean! So see - I'm not 100% type A!
|
|
Peace Of Mind
Senior Associate
[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 16:53:02 GMT -5
Posts: 15,554
Location: Paradise
|
Post by Peace Of Mind on Sept 6, 2013 16:59:39 GMT -5
Mich - That should be your tag line. That is awesome!
ETA: Not that you lost more than you could imagine but your attitude and the 2nd part.
|
|
Jaguar
Administrator
Fear does not stop death. It stops life.
Joined: Dec 20, 2011 6:07:45 GMT -5
Posts: 50,108
Mini-Profile Background: {"image":"https://cdn.nickpic.host/images/IZlZ65.jpg","color":""}
Mini-Profile Text Color: 290066
|
Post by Jaguar on Sept 6, 2013 17:32:00 GMT -5
I'm supposed to stop being Type A? That's like asking me not to breathe. Being pregnant/a parent has forced me to loosen up. Toddlers laugh at your need for control.
Toddlers bring you down to your knees.
|
|
buystoys
Junior Associate
Joined: Mar 30, 2012 4:58:12 GMT -5
Posts: 5,650
|
Post by buystoys on Sept 6, 2013 17:59:05 GMT -5
Forget the results and live in the experience.
I can find the flaws in everything single thing I've done in my life. I've struggled to learn, and hopefully can TRULY learn, to hold on to the experience of creation and revel in it! I will never have the talent my mother, sister, nieces, ad nauseum have. However, I truly LOVED the time I spent creating the scrapbooks of our family reunions, creating a counted cross stitch piece for my mom, creating cards and holiday ornaments for friends, etc. Every time I see an error in the result, I make an intense effort to point my thoughts to the pleasure and joy I felt in the creation of the piece.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 7, 2024 4:27:59 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Sept 6, 2013 20:15:23 GMT -5
Start with a gallon of paint, a large piece of paper and your writhing naked form creating abstract images.
|
|
Sum Dum Gai
Senior Associate
Joined: Aug 15, 2011 15:39:24 GMT -5
Posts: 19,892
|
Post by Sum Dum Gai on Sept 6, 2013 20:31:34 GMT -5
If you really want to get over the perfectionist thing start doing your own home repairs and painting. No matter how many hours you put into what should be a half hour job it never ever comes out perfect. All I can see when I'm done are the mistakes.
I painted my daughters bedroom a spring green with white trim and ceiling. I used one of their fine point watercolor brushes to do the edges anywhere that the green meets white. Took fucking forever, and looks better than any professional paint job we've ever had done. 3 years later when I go in there the slight imperfections along the edges still stick out to me because I know where all of them are.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 7, 2024 4:27:59 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Sept 7, 2013 12:27:57 GMT -5
If you ever find out, please share with my wife... We are having a small party for her mom birthday today and she is driving me Bonkers wanting everything perfect. Getting her drunk is out of the question since she is cleansing so no alcohol. You type A people are a PITA to deal with you know
|
|
swamp
Community Leader
THEY’RE EATING THE DOGS!!!!!!!
Joined: Dec 19, 2010 16:03:22 GMT -5
Posts: 45,617
|
Post by swamp on Sept 7, 2013 12:30:15 GMT -5
Make her gluten free sugar free pot brownies.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 7, 2024 4:27:59 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Sept 7, 2013 17:14:18 GMT -5
Meditation & Yoga
|
|
Nazgul Girl
Junior Associate
Babysitting our new grandbaby 3 days a week !
Joined: Dec 25, 2010 23:25:02 GMT -5
Posts: 5,913
Today's Mood: excellent
|
Post by Nazgul Girl on Sept 8, 2013 15:51:42 GMT -5
I don't think it's really possible to "get over" being a Type A personality. I think they're just hardwired that way, with a dose of OCD thrown in. Obviously, this is just my opinion, but sometimes, Type A's seem to just go nuts over some little, insignificant thing or situation. and I wonder how long they're going to live. You can only short-circuit the electrical system so much before it's fried, so to speak. My sister is a high-earning, high-design architect. She's a wonderful person and I love her very much, but I can only stand to be around her for so long. ( She can't stand me for very long, either ). We can take each other for about 4 hours, and then she usually has a hissy fit about something. My clothing, my hair, the restaurant, the color of the car, the way my husband trimmed the bushes at our house, how I raised my daughter, what I served at Thanksgiving many years ( decades ) ago, how I took care of our mother's Christmas ornaments I had inherited ( that was the last one ), how she doesn't like dogs in the house. Just anything. She tells me on a regular basis about how she screams at her boss and at coworkers. Do you think anyone really likes working with her ? I doubt it.
|
|
Peace Of Mind
Senior Associate
[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 16:53:02 GMT -5
Posts: 15,554
Location: Paradise
|
Post by Peace Of Mind on Sept 8, 2013 16:21:34 GMT -5
If you ever find out, please share with my wife... We are having a small party for her mom birthday today and she is driving me Bonkers wanting everything perfect. Getting her drunk is out of the question since she is cleansing so no alcohol. You type A people are a PITA to deal with you know Of course we know! That's why some of us don't care to "fix" it. Now go to the store and get me my favorite wine and don't screw it up this time. And pick up your clothes. The house is FILTHY with that sock on the floor! Don't you look at me in that tone! Now get out of the house so I clean it with my Q-tips and magnifying glass!
|
|
Shooby
Senior Associate
Joined: Jan 17, 2013 0:32:36 GMT -5
Posts: 14,782
Mini-Profile Name Color: 1cf04f
|
Post by Shooby on Sept 8, 2013 19:38:12 GMT -5
Not to be Debbie Downer but I really have learned that most of what we nit pick about just doesn't matter. Life is short. People we love are here and gone. Nobody will care if you finished your to do list. Yes work hard but don't sweat the small stuff and take time to enjoy.
|
|
Peace Of Mind
Senior Associate
[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 16:53:02 GMT -5
Posts: 15,554
Location: Paradise
|
Post by Peace Of Mind on Sept 8, 2013 20:37:26 GMT -5
Not to be Debbie Downer but I really have learned that most of what we nit pick about just doesn't matter. Life is short. People we love are here and gone. Nobody will care if you finished your to do list. Yes work hard but don't sweat the small stuff and take time to enjoy. Can you please find a new schtick? This one is annoying. TYIA.
|
|
raeoflyte
Senior Associate
Joined: Feb 3, 2011 15:43:53 GMT -5
Posts: 15,004
|
Post by raeoflyte on Sept 8, 2013 20:44:25 GMT -5
I don't think it's really possible to "get over" being a Type A personality. I think they're just hardwired that way, with a dose of OCD thrown in. Obviously, this is just my opinion, but sometimes, Type A's seem to just go nuts over some little, insignificant thing or situation. and I wonder how long they're going to live. You can only short-circuit electrical so much before it's fried, so to speak. My sister is a high-earning, high-design architect. She's a wonderful person and I love her very much, but I can only stand to be around her for so long. ( She can't stand me for very long, either ). We can take each other for about 4 hours, and then she usually has a hissy fit about something. My clothing, my hair, the restaurant, the color of the car, the way my husband trimmed the bushes at our house, how I raised my daughter, what I served at Thanksgiving many years ( decades ) ago, how I took care of our mother's Christmas ornaments I had inherited ( that was the last one ), how she doesn't like dogs in the house. Just anything. She tells me on a regular basis about how she screams at her boss and at coworkers. Do you think anyone really likes working with her ? I doubt it. I think that is way more extreme than just a type A personality. type A people arent typically rude or mean. They are very self critical, but that doesn't mean they apply that to everyone else. Honey-I really like the post suggesting to do more of the painting classes. I went to one recently, and I loved looking down the line because everyone's painting was beautiful and unique. I'd also say to just jump into things that look interesting. For example, I like to look through cupcake decorating books. I usually decide what I like and figure out the basics, but don't use the book when I'm making them. Sometimes mine come out better than the inspiration, and sometimes lacking. But they always taste good regardless, so I just enjoy the process. I also like art projects with the kids. I'm never going to get those perfect baby footprint butterfly, but they still look pretty cute and we had a blast painting.
|
|
Nazgul Girl
Junior Associate
Babysitting our new grandbaby 3 days a week !
Joined: Dec 25, 2010 23:25:02 GMT -5
Posts: 5,913
Today's Mood: excellent
|
Post by Nazgul Girl on Sept 8, 2013 20:52:24 GMT -5
I don't think it's really possible to "get over" being a Type A personality. I think they're just hardwired that way, with a dose of OCD thrown in. Obviously, this is just my opinion, but sometimes, Type A's seem to just go nuts over some little, insignificant thing or situation. and I wonder how long they're going to live. You can only short-circuit electrical so much before it's fried, so to speak. My sister is a high-earning, high-design architect. She's a wonderful person and I love her very much, but I can only stand to be around her for so long. ( She can't stand me for very long, either ). We can take each other for about 4 hours, and then she usually has a hissy fit about something. My clothing, my hair, the restaurant, the color of the car, the way my husband trimmed the bushes at our house, how I raised my daughter, what I served at Thanksgiving many years ( decades ) ago, how I took care of our mother's Christmas ornaments I had inherited ( that was the last one ), how she doesn't like dogs in the house. Just anything. She tells me on a regular basis about how she screams at her boss and at coworkers. Do you think anyone really likes working with her ? I doubt it. I think that is way more extreme than just a type A personality. type A people arent typically rude or mean. They are very self critical, but that doesn't mean they apply that to everyone else. Honey-I really like the post suggesting to do more of the painting classes. I went to one recently, and I loved looking down the line because everyone's painting was beautiful and unique. I'd also say to just jump into things that look interesting. For example, I like to look through cupcake decorating books. I usually decide what I like and figure out the basics, but don't use the book when I'm making them. Sometimes mine come out better than the inspiration, and sometimes lacking. But they always taste good regardless, so I just enjoy the process. I also like art projects with the kids. I'm never going to get those perfect baby footprint butterfly, but they still look pretty cute and we had a blast painting. You're right, reoflyte. I do think she's got some big problems. She's the kind of person that gives heart attacks, not gets them ( per the old saying ). I just have stopped paying attention to the static she emits ! It's sad, but I see her on holidays, communicate with her mostly by email, and just kind of love her from a distance.
|
|
Shooby
Senior Associate
Joined: Jan 17, 2013 0:32:36 GMT -5
Posts: 14,782
Mini-Profile Name Color: 1cf04f
|
Post by Shooby on Sept 9, 2013 5:51:04 GMT -5
If your type A perfectionism is branching out to everyone around you, then that is something to think about. There is only one "right" way to do something as type A's tend to think. So, if you are going about critiquing and criticizing everyone else then it is time to take a step back. And, if you find you are too hard on yourself as well, then over time, that really isn't going to help you either. Finding the balance is what you want.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 7, 2024 4:27:59 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Sept 9, 2013 8:16:41 GMT -5
I am married to a Type A and I can't tell you how many times I have told him that there's more than one way to do something. In fact, I take different ways home from places just to teach the kiddos that there's a million different ways to do something.
|
|
teen persuasion
Senior Member
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 21:58:49 GMT -5
Posts: 4,161
|
Post by teen persuasion on Sept 9, 2013 8:42:12 GMT -5
I see Raeoflyte beat me to it. I do a Preschool Story Hour at the library, and we always end w/ a craft to go along w/ the theme. I try to simplify it enough for the age level, most are under 4, but some need a bit of parental "assistance". I also tend to let the kids do it however they want - there is no "right way" in my eyes. I'm always amazed at the interesting twists that the individual kids put on the crafts, things that I didn't foresee. I like and applaud the different results. There are a few parents that I want to slap down, though. YOU don't need to do the craft for them. It doesn't need to be perfect! The point is for the kids to be creative (sh - and practice some fine motor skills), not watch you do it.
|
|
HoneyBBQ
Junior Associate
Joined: Dec 27, 2010 10:36:09 GMT -5
Posts: 5,395
Mini-Profile Background: {"image":"","color":"3b444e"}
|
Post by HoneyBBQ on Sept 9, 2013 10:11:21 GMT -5
Ok - just to clarify, I'm mostly type A about myself, not my house or other people. I hold very high standards for myself, and not so much for others. My spouse is a type B- so while it has lent itself to some jokes it hasn't been a source of heart attacks for either of us. I was looking into an evening painting class. Maybe if I pay money to do it, I'll go do it and not want to "waste" the money by not painting! Ratchets - I do have active hobbies, I run and play ice hockey. So I think I'm good there. I think I'm just mostly critical of my own performance, not really type A....
|
|
greeniis10
Well-Known Member
Joined: May 9, 2012 12:27:09 GMT -5
Posts: 1,834
|
Post by greeniis10 on Sept 9, 2013 11:36:20 GMT -5
First, a Type A personality doesn't need to be "gotten over" just like an introvert doesn't need to be "fixed". I think you just adapt to it and work with it.
Besides, you already realize that: you're TypeA with yourself, but don't project it onto others, which is good! The fact that you don't insist on a perfectly clean house tells me you can mange your personality just fine.
What I DO hear you say is you wish you were more creative and that you would like to relax and let the creative juices flow instead of focusing on right and wrong. When it comes to art and creativity there is NO right or wrong; it's up to each individual. Sadly, some of us just aren't creative naturally (me) but your idea to take a class sounds good!
I did one of those wine and painting sessions earlier this year with one of my SILs - LOVED it! I noticed every so often I was really tense holding the paint brush and concentrating too hard and then the instructor would change the music and remind us to have fun. Also, not being creative myself I was trying too hard to make my painting "right" by making sure it matched the teacher's finished one. But after the class we all looked at each other's finished works and I was stunned by the variances and interpretations!
|
|