shanendoah
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Post by shanendoah on Aug 23, 2013 15:31:32 GMT -5
Since I have posted here about some of the frustrations involved in the adoption process, and since adoption was a bit of a hot topic here in the last month, I thought I would share some good news.
As of Tuesday, DD is officially legally free.
Her father relinquished his rights in court. We will be responsible for sending him one letter with one picture a year. He is not entitled to any direct contact with DD. He will be responsible for making sure we know where to send the letter.
This means that once the state mandated 6 month waiting period is done (in about 10 weeks), we will be able to adopt DD. 
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GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl
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Post by GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl on Aug 23, 2013 15:34:41 GMT -5
Congratulations!!!!
That is wonderful news!!!!
So glad that all of the time and effort you put in to get approved was worth it.
I wish the Shanaendoah family a life full of love, laughter, and happy memories of time together!!!
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Jaguar
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Post by Jaguar on Aug 23, 2013 15:38:59 GMT -5
That is freaking fabulous news. 
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 23, 2013 16:02:56 GMT -5
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sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Aug 23, 2013 16:17:17 GMT -5
That is the best news I have heard all week. Congratulation to you, C and Poptart  Very Very Very Very happy for you all. |
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wvugurl26
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Post by wvugurl26 on Aug 23, 2013 16:50:39 GMT -5
Congratulations to all of you!! I hope the rest of the process goes quickly.
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Nazgul Girl
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Babysitting our new grandbaby 3 days a week !
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Post by Nazgul Girl on Aug 23, 2013 19:42:18 GMT -5
Congratulations, and I'm glad that her father did the right thing for her.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 23, 2013 21:49:44 GMT -5
Congratulations!!!  |
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motherto2
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Post by motherto2 on Aug 23, 2013 22:05:25 GMT -5
Woot Woot Woot! Happy dance for all of you! I know it's been a rough ride, but here's hoping to settling in as a family and moving on making happy family memories!
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Aug 23, 2013 22:21:06 GMT -5
Congratulations, and I'm glad that her father did the right thing for her.  Congratulations!!   |
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Sam_2.0
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Post by Sam_2.0 on Aug 23, 2013 23:56:14 GMT -5
Awesome news! Congratulations to your family!
Sent from my SPH-L710 using proboards
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happyscooter
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Post by happyscooter on Aug 24, 2013 6:54:32 GMT -5
Such happiness for you!
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Aug 24, 2013 9:41:02 GMT -5
Yay! Good news! How is the pop tart doing?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 24, 2013 9:54:34 GMT -5
Congratulations!!!!!
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Aug 24, 2013 10:02:45 GMT -5
I know that 6 month waiting period is a nail biter. A friend adopted an abandoned baby. Because the parents never even acknowledged the baby, they couldn't get anyone to formally sign rights away. She was on edge for the whole waiting period (which I think was a full year for her) because she was so afraid the mother would overcome whatever her problem was and come back and take the baby after she had spent months and months loving the little thing. But she didn't, and the little girl is happily down the street, cute as a bug, now 3 years old. Enjoy your DD!
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Spellbound454
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"In the end, we remember not the words of our enemies but the silence of our friends"
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Post by Spellbound454 on Aug 24, 2013 10:36:07 GMT -5
Very best wishes to you shanedoah...and your family.... |
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shanendoah
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Post by shanendoah on Aug 26, 2013 10:27:48 GMT -5
Thanks everyone.
We'll share the news with pop tart tonight, so we'll see how things are going tomorrow.
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sesfw
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Post by sesfw on Aug 26, 2013 13:26:01 GMT -5
'I wish the Shanaendoah family a life full of love, laughter, and happy memories of time together!!!' Me too ....... what wonderful news. |
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shanendoah
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Post by shanendoah on Aug 27, 2013 11:47:48 GMT -5
Told pop tart last night.
Her main question - was his (bio-dad's) name X or Y?
We'd suspected that there was someone in her life she referred to as "dad" who was not her bio-dad. This confirmed it. But we did then have to have the conversation that Y did not get a say in the matter. Even if he had been mom's husband (and not just BF), he had no say beyond Mom's.
We also started the process of slowly reframing the conversation around her mom. She had been told (by people who believed it was best for her) that the judge took mom's rights away. That is not true. Mom gave up her rights. That's hard for her to hear, but otherwise, we have the specter of a Mom who might be trying to get her back to deal with. She needs to understand the situation as it really is, in an age appropriate manner.
Her other question, when we talked about the yearly letter and picture to let bio-dad know she was doing good, was- what if I'm not doing good? We dealt with an extreme there (because she is generally a child of extremes) and explained that the agreement also requires us to notify bio-dad if she gets really sick or in a bad accident. (It also gives him the right to come to the funeral, if she should die, but no other "visitation" - and let me tell you, when you're adopting a kid, the last thing you want to see in your paperwork is provisions for what happens with bio-parents should the kid die. I get why it's there, still not what I wanted to think about.)
She has a therapy appt today, which is one of the reasons we wanted to talk to her last night. That way, even if she didn't want to talk to us, she can talk to her counselor about it.
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