Adoption gift?

[cronewitch]

 Next Saturday I am going to an adoption at a court house. The boy is excited telling people he will be the new boy. They got him at birth and now he is four and finally getting adopted. His older brother and sister were adopted a couple of years ago and he will have another brother and sister who were born into the family and one foster brother. If I buy the new boy a gift when he is one of 6 kids and I didn't get the others adoption gifts will it be wrong. Do kids usually get gifts for being adopted? What would you get a 4 year old boy as an adoption gift.

[milee]

Not sure of the family dynamics, so no idea if it would cause a problem that he's the only one that got such a gift, but it sounds like a kind gesture.  If you're worried about it causing problems with the other kids, maybe you could make it an outing instead.  Take him for ice cream or a favorite activity. 

[Deleted]

Or if its do-able make it an outing gift for the 'new family'... Movie tickets or take everyone for ice cream...

[happyscooter]

A book for his parents to write their family history.

[sheilaincali]

Depending on how much you want to spend- I would look at getting the entire family an adventure of sorts.  Here an annual membership to the Zoo is pretty reasonable (was $60 now I think it's closer to $75).  You could get the family something along those lines so they can have a "family-moon" type day. 


I would get the boy being adopted a nice card and congratulate him on becoming a "new boy".  He may be a little young to appreciate it now but it is something I imagine his mom will keep for him. 

[Deleted]

I like the idea of getting something for the family, but I wouldn't worry about the kid's siblings. It's kind of like a Birthday -- this is a milestone for him. The other Adoptees had their milestone a couple of years ago, right?

[Deleted]

Oh for pete's sake, if you are specifically being invited they are treating it like a christening. Just get the boy something. I am so sick of this idea of having to get everyone something if you are buying for one. People are allowed to have special occasions to themselves. There will be other times the other kids will get stuff. It is not like the well of gift giving dries up after this event.

[Deleted]

Yes, but she specifically said she didn't get the others gifts for their adoptions and that was a concern. I think a 'whole family' gift is also appropriate given that seems what the boy wants o celebrate... Belonging to the family, not being singled out. 

[Clever Username]

The boy is excited

That's as far as I needed to read.
If he's excited about it, go for it.

Others might have viewed it as an eye rolling experience in beurocrocy, we don't need no stinking paper for you to be my son.

[Bob Ross]

Aug 6, 2013 2:00:24 GMT -5 cronewitch said:

  What would you get a 4 year old boy as an adoption gift.

I dunno.  An autographed picture of Peyton Manning captioned with the phrase "your real daddy"?

As you can see, I'm no good at this.

[Bob Ross]

I'll bet a new gruel spoon would make a good present.  Or maybe a bootblack kit?  

[Peace Of Mind]

Aug 6, 2013 2:00:24 GMT -5 cronewitch said:

 Next Saturday I am going to an adoption at a court house. The boy is excited telling people he will be the new boy. They got him at birth and now he is four and finally getting adopted. His older brother and sister were adopted a couple of years ago and he will have another brother and sister who were born into the family and one foster brother. If I buy the new boy a gift when he is one of 6 kids and I didn't get the others adoption gifts will it be wrong. Do kids usually get gifts for being adopted? What would you get a 4 year old boy as an adoption gift.

Damn allergies!  <<wipes tears>> 

OK - Now that I can see again what did you do with the other kids that were adopted?  And I agree with Later.

[Peace77]

How about a small photo album to keep his family pictures?  You could take some pictures of the event so he can put them in later.  

[Deleted]

Aug 6, 2013 10:21:54 GMT -5 oped said:

Yes, but she specifically said she didn't get the others gifts for their adoptions and that was a concern. I think a 'whole family' gift is also appropriate given that seems what the boy wants o celebrate... Belonging to the family, not being singled out. 

It seems like she wasn't invited to the adoption event with the others. I stand by what I said. We don't have to do exactly the same things for everyone.

[Deleted]

I am perfectly fine with you having that interpretation. I guess I'm responding to the tone of 'for Pete's sake' and bing sick of ... Etc.

I think the ideas most were sharing weren't about being 'politically correct', but about the nature of the celebration and concerns of the OP. I personally would give a family gift at an adoption ceremony. I think of it as a family event. 

[Regis]

Aug 6, 2013 5:48:00 GMT -5 milee said:

Not sure of the family dynamics, so no idea if it would cause a problem that he's the only one that got such a gift, but it sounds like a kind gesture.  If you're worried about it causing problems with the other kids, maybe you could make it an outing instead.  Take him for ice cream or a favorite activity. 

You can adopt me if you take me out for ice cream!  

[Deleted]

Aug 6, 2013 15:45:40 GMT -5 oped said:

I am perfectly fine with you having that interpretation. I guess I'm responding to the tone of 'for Pete's sake' and bing sick of ... Etc.

I think the ideas most were sharing weren't about being 'politically correct', but about the nature of the celebration and concerns of the OP. I personally would give a family gift at an adoption ceremony. I think of it as a family event. 

I was responding to the concern of the OP too, using the phrases "for Pete's sake" etc. I don't think she should be concerned about what gifts she got for others at different times.

[Abby Normal]

Because he's excited- I would get a small photo album and do up the first page with the words " MY FAMILY".  Then let him put in pictures of everyone so he can show it off.

[Nazgul Girl]

Aug 6, 2013 16:37:11 GMT -5 Abby Normal said:

Because he's excited- I would get a small photo album and do up the first page with the words " MY FAMILY".  Then let him put in pictures of everyone so he can show it off.

    I think that this is a nice, constructive idea.   Maybe a little camera, too.  

[toomuchreality]

Aug 6, 2013 9:33:53 GMT -5 @justaposter said:

Oh for pete's sake, if you are specifically being invited they are treating it like a christening. Just get the boy something. I am so sick of this idea of having to get everyone something if you are buying for one. People are allowed to have special occasions to themselves. There will be other times the other kids will get stuff. It is not like the well of gift giving dries up after this event.

later-
Does this mean I don't get a gift too, next time you go to the store?   I'm crushed!

[toomuchreality]

Ratchets
Just take the brats home and throw 'em back in the dungeon...no point giving them hope with presents !!

Bob Ross
I'll bet a new gruel spoon would make a good present. Or maybe a bootblack kit?