whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Jul 2, 2013 13:07:25 GMT -5
Well, I am no help since 1 - I have no sense of humor and 2 - my kids are still too little to get good jokes. That being said, somehow my not even 5yr old discovered the wonders of sarcasm (obviously he didn't get it from me!!), so life is getting more interesting around here, since his younger brothers don't get it. It went something like this: DS1 - B, thank you sooo much for destroying my tower DS2 (3 yr old) - oh you are welcome, E, you want me to do it again? (completely serious) anywhooo, my DH is the funny one in the family. So, there are times when there is a brooding temper tantrum and he just starts telling them all kinds of crazy things in a normal, serious tone, so they stop crying/whining, etc and try to figure out how serious he is.
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Peace Of Mind
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Jul 2, 2013 13:31:37 GMT -5
Now I wish I had a kid to say that to - that is hilarious! Maybe I'll say that to the Nosy Nellies that ask my why I don't have any children.
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greeniis10
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Post by greeniis10 on Jul 2, 2013 14:04:12 GMT -5
Humor is imperative with teenagers! And as much as I hate excessive cell phone usage by the kids these days, it WAS helpful to send them funny pictures or inspirational sayings when either they weren't home or were angry and mom and dad and I know they wouldn't answer a phone call. But, texts and pictures they always opened.
Embarrassment was also a good tool. And I mean in moderation - nothing scarring like some of the things we've heard in the news recently. Example: when they were obssessed with a particulary (annoying) song and it's accompanying inappropriate dance DH and I made sure we learned the dance and ALL the words and joined right in! (Exaggeratively, of course.)Turned them off from it every time...
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greeniis10
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Post by greeniis10 on Jul 2, 2013 14:07:03 GMT -5
I wish I could remember more specific examples as you all have, but it IS fun to be reminded of things we said and did when we see our oldest son now using the same tactics on his 7 yr. old! It will only get worse from here and DH and I are thoroughly enjoying it! And, DSD just had a daugther. She is only 2 months old, but DSD is already loudly proclaiming how HER daughter won't dress or act the way she did as a teenager! Hah! Oh we can hardly wait...
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Jul 2, 2013 15:40:13 GMT -5
When my kids were younger - like toddler/preschool age, I think, my husband and I watched the Southpark episode where Cesear Milan came to train Cartman. He did a finger clamp thing on his shoulder to get him to stop complaining. The next day my daughter was throwing a fit over something, and my husband just looked at her, and did the finger clamp thing on her shoulder and then turned to me and shrugged because it didn't work. I was laughing my ass off. Kid didn't pick up on it at all.
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sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Jul 2, 2013 15:46:30 GMT -5
My opinion is that to be a parent you really need to have a sense of humor otherwise you'd spend about 50% of those early years crying
My smart ass kid. We were talking about the birds and the bees the other day and I made a joke and said "I better not catch you playing naked twister with your gf" and damn if that kid didn't look at me and with a straight face say "you won't, strip scrabble is more fun" and walk away.
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moneymaven
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Post by moneymaven on Jul 2, 2013 16:40:36 GMT -5
Humor is the zest of life! DH and I both think we're funny. Somehow, DS is just two yet he has a big personality with comedic timing and sarcasm.
He's good at deflecting when he's in trouble by telling a joke or doing something silly. Sometimes it irritates me but I remember he's modeling behavior he's watched. I hope that's a skill he'll use for life - humor saves!
ETA: dad is a tough military man, but he has the best humor. I remember when we were younger, he was driving with us and we pulled along side a car of teenagers blasting music. He started blasting his oldies music, turned his hat to the side and started dancing absurdly. It was hysterical.
He also had a great solution for fighting over the front seat. If we argued, he'd make us hold hands in the backseat for the entire car ride and would laugh the whole way.
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Shooby
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Post by Shooby on Jul 2, 2013 17:55:46 GMT -5
Yes, that never gets old to them!
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Shooby
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Post by Shooby on Jul 2, 2013 17:57:57 GMT -5
If one of my kids starts complaining about how the other sib gets this that or the other thing, i just look them in the eye and say "Well, i like that sib better than you".
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violagirl
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Post by violagirl on Jul 2, 2013 19:23:10 GMT -5
Humor is the zest of life! DH and I both think we're funny. Somehow, DS is just two yet he has a big personality with comedic timing and sarcasm. He's good at deflecting when he's in trouble by telling a joke or doing something silly. Sometimes it irritates me but I remember he's modeling behavior he's watched. I hope that's a skill he'll use for life - humor saves! ETA: dad is a tough military man, but he has the best humor. I remember when we were younger, he was driving with us and we pulled along side a car of teenagers blasting music. He started blasting his oldies music, turned his hat to the side and started dancing absurdly. It was hysterical. He also had a great solution for fighting over the front seat. If we argued, he'd make us hold hands in the backseat for the entire car ride and would laugh the whole way. Maybe our Dad's are related. I remember once him pulling up to a stoplight in the family sedan with the back seat full of kids and look at the guy in the muscle car next to us and rev the engine to instigate a drag race. The guy just laughed. My brother and i were also sent to sit in the Big Chair with arms around each other shoulders when we were fighting. It was so ridiculous to be mad at someone you were hugging that we would end up laughing instead.
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cronewitch
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Post by cronewitch on Jul 2, 2013 19:57:56 GMT -5
Humor is imperative with teenagers! And as much as I hate excessive cell phone usage by the kids these days, it WAS helpful to send them funny pictures or inspirational sayings when either they weren't home or were angry and mom and dad and I know they wouldn't answer a phone call. But, texts and pictures they always opened. Embarrassment was also a good tool. And I mean in moderation - nothing scarring like some of the things we've heard in the news recently. Example: when they were obssessed with a particulary (annoying) song and it's accompanying inappropriate dance DH and I made sure we learned the dance and ALL the words and joined right in! (Exaggeratively, of course.)Turned them off from it every time... Embarrassment is a little mean. My niece's 14 year old step son was caught necking with a girl on a street corner by his father, little brother and step mom. He had been told not to see that girl she is a little tramp. So they tell the entire family what happened. They threatened to make the girl watch him put a condom on a banana. His new step grandma said use a cucumber it is bigger and more impressive. Boy squirms, hides behind pillow from chair. We all laughed at him. I asked him if he knew how to skin a banana, he said no. I explain you go one skin, two skin, three skin, five skin, he said you skipped four. I told him bananas don't have a foreskin. I suggested his mother dress him funny so no girls will want to kiss him. I think he got the message nobody wants him to be a father at 14, don't hang out with easy girls and if you must you need to know about condoms. If he messes up the entire family will give him no mercy. He asked for mercy but we said if you can't do the time don't do the crime.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 2, 2013 20:06:18 GMT -5
Little monkey is a little young for all of this, but I'm learning a lot.
DH and I are both smart alecks. I figure we are screwed when she starts to be able to come up with her own comebacks.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Jul 2, 2013 20:25:45 GMT -5
Little monkey is a little young for all of this, but I'm learning a lot. DH and I are both smart alecks. I figure we are screwed when she starts to be able to come up with her own comebacks. Warning: it starts much earlier than you think it would. DS is 7 and seems to be getting the hang of it quite well.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jul 2, 2013 21:12:10 GMT -5
Now I wish I had a kid to say that to - that is hilarious! Maybe I'll say that to the Nosy Nellies that ask my why I don't have any children. When they ask you why you don't have children, just tell them straight faced that you do. You are keeping them in the attic until they turn 18. You wouldn't believe the answers I would give when people ragged me about having only one
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steff
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Post by steff on Jul 2, 2013 21:32:37 GMT -5
Now I wish I had a kid to say that to - that is hilarious! Maybe I'll say that to the Nosy Nellies that ask my why I don't have any children. When they ask you why you don't have children, just tell them straight faced that you do. You are keeping them in the attic until they turn 18. You wouldn't believe the answers I would give when people ragged me about having only one I had someone who was a friend of a friend that I didn't even know ask me once why I only had 1 kiddo (she did it in a really know it all snotty tone & she added that I was selfish to only have 1). I told her that I was mentally unstable & couldn't be trusted with more than one kid at a time. While she stared at me in shock, I twitched a few times and kept looking around really fast like I was being followed. Hubby, knowing my sense of humor, when he was confronted by the same lady & she repeated what I said, his response was to nod & say "the doctors at the home said only 1 kid. If we have anymore she has to go back to the home." He then smiled & waved at me. LOL I didn't even know this lady's name, so I really didn't give two shits what she thought.
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milee
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Post by milee on Jul 2, 2013 22:10:48 GMT -5
I had someone who was a friend of a friend that I didn't even know ask me once why I only had 1 kiddo (she did it in a really know it all snotty tone & she added that I was selfish to only have 1). I told her that I was mentally unstable & couldn't be trusted with more than one kid at a time. While she stared at me in shock, I twitched a few times and kept looking around really fast like I was being followed. Hubby, knowing my sense of humor, when he was confronted by the same lady & she repeated what I said, his response was to nod & say "the doctors at the home said only 1 kid. If we have anymore she has to go back to the home." He then smiled & waved at me. LOL I didn't even know this lady's name, so I really didn't give two shits what she thought. You do realize that the next time you see this woman it will be because she is your kid's teacher or the bank officer in charge of approving your loan, right? Thanks, everybody, for all the good ideas.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 2, 2013 22:16:21 GMT -5
Or your son will end up dating her daughter
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jul 3, 2013 9:05:48 GMT -5
I had someone who was a friend of a friend that I didn't even know ask me once why I only had 1 kiddo (she did it in a really know it all snotty tone & she added that I was selfish to only have 1). I told her that I was mentally unstable & couldn't be trusted with more than one kid at a time. While she stared at me in shock, I twitched a few times and kept looking around really fast like I was being followed. Hubby, knowing my sense of humor, when he was confronted by the same lady & she repeated what I said, his response was to nod & say "the doctors at the home said only 1 kid. If we have anymore she has to go back to the home." He then smiled & waved at me. LOL I didn't even know this lady's name, so I really didn't give two shits what she thought. You do realize that the next time you see this woman it will be because she is your kid's teacher or the bank officer in charge of approving your loan, right? Thanks, everybody, for all the good ideas. I don't know about steff but in situations like this I pull out the old "that must have been my evil twin" trump card
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greeniis10
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Post by greeniis10 on Jul 3, 2013 9:23:53 GMT -5
Humor is imperative with teenagers! And as much as I hate excessive cell phone usage by the kids these days, it WAS helpful to send them funny pictures or inspirational sayings when either they weren't home or were angry and mom and dad and I know they wouldn't answer a phone call. But, texts and pictures they always opened. Embarrassment was also a good tool. And I mean in moderation - nothing scarring like some of the things we've heard in the news recently. Example: when they were obssessed with a particulary (annoying) song and it's accompanying inappropriate dance DH and I made sure we learned the dance and ALL the words and joined right in! (Exaggeratively, of course.)Turned them off from it every time... Embarrassment is a little mean. My niece's 14 year old step son was caught necking with a girl on a street corner by his father, little brother and step mom. He had been told not to see that girl she is a little tramp. So they tell the entire family what happened. They threatened to make the girl watch him put a condom on a banana. His new step grandma said use a cucumber it is bigger and more impressive. Boy squirms, hides behind pillow from chair. We all laughed at him. I asked him if he knew how to skin a banana, he said no. I explain you go one skin, two skin, three skin, five skin, he said you skipped four. I told him bananas don't have a foreskin. I suggested his mother dress him funny so no girls will want to kiss him. I think he got the message nobody wants him to be a father at 14, don't hang out with easy girls and if you must you need to know about condoms. If he messes up the entire family will give him no mercy. He asked for mercy but we said if you can't do the time don't do the crime. Embarrassment IS mean, which is why I said I'd never (nor did we ever) do anything extreme. Probably should have used a different word. Didn't mean anything negative by it.
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Pants
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Post by Pants on Jul 3, 2013 10:11:16 GMT -5
Humor is imperative with teenagers! And as much as I hate excessive cell phone usage by the kids these days, it WAS helpful to send them funny pictures or inspirational sayings when either they weren't home or were angry and mom and dad and I know they wouldn't answer a phone call. But, texts and pictures they always opened. Embarrassment was also a good tool. And I mean in moderation - nothing scarring like some of the things we've heard in the news recently. Example: when they were obssessed with a particulary (annoying) song and it's accompanying inappropriate dance DH and I made sure we learned the dance and ALL the words and joined right in! (Exaggeratively, of course.)Turned them off from it every time... Embarrassment is a little mean. My niece's 14 year old step son was caught necking with a girl on a street corner by his father, little brother and step mom. He had been told not to see that girl she is a little tramp. So they tell the entire family what happened. They threatened to make the girl watch him put a condom on a banana. His new step grandma said use a cucumber it is bigger and more impressive. Boy squirms, hides behind pillow from chair. We all laughed at him. I asked him if he knew how to skin a banana, he said no. I explain you go one skin, two skin, three skin, five skin, he said you skipped four. I told him bananas don't have a foreskin. I suggested his mother dress him funny so no girls will want to kiss him. I think he got the message nobody wants him to be a father at 14, don't hang out with easy girls and if you must you need to know about condoms. If he messes up the entire family will give him no mercy. He asked for mercy but we said if you can't do the time don't do the crime. Embarassment IS mean. Not as mean as calling a 14 year old a tramp, but mean.
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steff
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Post by steff on Jul 3, 2013 12:11:02 GMT -5
I was talking to kiddo about this thread last night & he reminded me of two things he says I say a lot to him. And he pointed out that both of them are lines from "Roseanne"...
When he does something stupid or asks something really ridiculous I look at him and ask "are you new here?". And I've told his friends not to screw up & do something really stupid while with kiddo because "he's one of the few things we own outright".
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justme
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Post by justme on Jul 3, 2013 16:19:27 GMT -5
When we were little and fell or hit something my dad would always move us aside and look at where we hit to see if we did any damage. It got us to stop crying, until probably 5 or 6 and then it just started to make me mad because I was crying because I was hurt not just because I cry anytime I fall anymore. My dad used to threaten us with tying us up in the shed with duct tape and only a bag of dog food to eat. By high school every time he did something I didn't like I would tell him to be nice otherwise he won't like my retirement plan for him.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jul 3, 2013 17:36:00 GMT -5
Today, DS (9) asked me how much time we would spend at the grocery store. I started walking in super slow motion, and said "Well, a long time if I walk like this."
We don't do mean/embarrassment. I have sensitive kids and don't need to go that far to make a point.
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happyscooter
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Post by happyscooter on Jul 5, 2013 6:46:54 GMT -5
This wasn't for my own kids but a group of teenagers from church. I was driving a van to an event and told them to get in a seat belt. Of course, seat belts aren't cool and you don't need them in a van. So I said 'I have too much to do this weekend and cannot be attending any funerals. So please buckle up.' They did.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 5, 2013 7:58:53 GMT -5
First off I believe that if your a parent you have to be able to see the humor in stuff. It's also a useful tool in dealing with kids (as is a baseball bat ). As teenagers both of my sons developed the habit of turning their shirts inside out when taking them off & then throwing them in the dirty clothes. That meant that in order to hand them I had to flip them back. Not a huge deal but it got to be a PITA after a while so I told them to stop it. Their answer was that the dryer did it. HUH? So I explained that I had heard that there was a dryer monster that lived in dryers who's sole purpose to turning shirts inside out. He did that so that half awake people would put on clothes inside out & go to school that way (providing a good laugh for anyone that saw them). All of a sudden the shirts stopped being inside out (teenage boys don't like to be laughed at).
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Jul 5, 2013 11:09:53 GMT -5
I use sarcasm so much that I've created one monster and am on the way with the 2nd. Youngest is so literal, I'll settle for him *understanding* that that was sarcasm. Oldest DS was in the kitchen with me one day and I said "son of a bitch!" about something and he looks at me with a straight face and says "Yes?" Of course, he also knew I was in a good mood and he wouldn't get knocked across the house I respond to any and all minor injuries with an offer to cut off offending part that's in pain. Oh, you got a scratch on your foot? Let me get the knife and cut that off for you so it stops hurting. Or, if they bump an arm on something, I offer to step on their toes so they can forget about the arm. I also check the furniture for injuries if it's involved.
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