HoneyBBQ
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Post by HoneyBBQ on Jun 18, 2013 11:18:20 GMT -5
OK, now I just really want to know what you do. LOL--why? I work in medicine. In a STEM field. Sort of behind the scenes person. I honestly don't want to say because it's a small field and I could be easily found with the information I've posted here.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jun 18, 2013 11:23:17 GMT -5
I work in medicine.
I had a feeling that was what you were working in when you mentioned private practice and your salary.
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happyhoix
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Post by happyhoix on Jun 18, 2013 12:23:50 GMT -5
I work in a STEM field, too (not medicine) and all the people in my department are guys. All of them kind of the introverted/nerdy type guys that is the stereotypical engineering male.
I have found they aren't that good with small talk, which is fine with me, because I'm not either. The head of the department has said multiple times that they just don't 'do' social events at work. We don't meet up after work. We used to go eat lunch when it was someone's birthday, but that fell by the wayside about a year ago, not because we didn't want to do it anymore, but because no one really wanted to be in charge of keeping track of everyone's birthday. It isn't that the guys aren't nice and polite, they just are not at all social.
Contrast that with my DH's workplace, which is mostly female, and mostly people with social work degrees. He has two co-workers who are forever planning birthday brunches for co-workers. They have pot luck lunches for all the major holidays, the office gets decorated, etc. DH hates it - he doesn't want to socialize with co-workers.
So I would guess part of it is you're the new boss, and possibly there are hard feelings because they think someone from inside the organization should have gotten that job, and part of it is that these guys just aren't all that social to begin with.
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HoneyBBQ
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Post by HoneyBBQ on Jun 18, 2013 12:29:38 GMT -5
I work in a STEM field, too (not medicine) and all the people in my department are guys. All of them kind of the introverted/nerdy type guys that is the stereotypical engineering male. I have found they aren't that good with small talk, which is fine with me, because I'm not either. The head of the department has said multiple times that they just don't 'do' social events at work. We don't meet up after work. We used to go eat lunch when it was someone's birthday, but that fell by the wayside about a year ago, not because we didn't want to do it anymore, but because no one really wanted to be in charge of keeping track of everyone's birthday. It isn't that the guys aren't nice and polite, they just are not at all social. Contrast that with my DH's workplace, which is mostly female, and mostly people with social work degrees. He has two co-workers who are forever planning birthday brunches for co-workers. They have pot luck lunches for all the major holidays, the office gets decorated, etc. DH hates it - he doesn't want to socialize with co-workers. So I would guess part of it is you're the new boss, and possibly there are hard feelings because they think someone from inside the organization should have gotten that job, and part of it is that these guys just aren't all that social to begin with. Except I'm not the boss. I'm in a leadership role which is not in a direct relationship to them. It's more about project management than resource management.
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happyhoix
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Post by happyhoix on Jun 18, 2013 12:36:46 GMT -5
Is it possible that one of those guys wanted your job and they're all a little hacked that an outsider got it?
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jun 18, 2013 12:38:30 GMT -5
I'd try to find people outside them. They aren't the only ones in the practice are they? If they want to be their own little club then let them. You're probably not the only one that finds them to be overly cliquey.
I drifted towards other people who worked in labs that weren't part of the Chinese club. They felt just as annoyed/isolated as I was. It was nice to find someone willing to socialize outside their own little group.
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Jun 18, 2013 13:51:48 GMT -5
OK, now I just really want to know what you do. LOL- -why? I work in medicine. In a STEM field. Sort of behind the scenes person. I honestly don't want to say because it's a small field and I could be easily found with the information I've posted here. Oh that's bc I am super nosy. I mean, I could pretend that I wanted to give you advice and needed to know bc depending on your field and the type of people who would enter it would make a difference on the inter-office relationships....but nope, just being nosy. Sorry!!!!
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HoneyBBQ
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Post by HoneyBBQ on Jun 18, 2013 14:25:51 GMT -5
LOL- -why? I work in medicine. In a STEM field. Sort of behind the scenes person. I honestly don't want to say because it's a small field and I could be easily found with the information I've posted here. Oh that's bc I am super nosy. I mean, I could pretend that I wanted to give you advice and needed to know bc depending on your field and the type of people who would enter it would make a difference on the inter-office relationships....but nope, just being nosy. Sorry!!!! LOL, it's fine. Sorry if I won't say exactly. I'm not trying to be secretive I'm just trying to remain anon. No worries!!! I'd probably want to know what I did, too!
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8 Bit WWBG
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Post by 8 Bit WWBG on Jun 18, 2013 21:13:07 GMT -5
...:::"Perhaps East Indian? There is a weird male/female thing there.":::...
Since India still has a pretty defined class hierarchy, things can get very interesting when they try to apply the same rules in America. Sometimes its men who can't stand having a female boss. Other times its someone from the west thinking that he/she is automatically above someone from the east.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 18, 2013 21:38:11 GMT -5
I'm sorry. Even though you are in a private practice now are you working in a medical complex where you may be able to meet other people in your field who don't work in your office? Is there a professional networking group that you may be able to meet people through? Where is your daughter in school/care? Have you met their parents? DH and I went to the social for DS' new school and the five sets of parents in his classroom (out of the 7 that came) had at least one doctor in there.
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