greeniis10
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Post by greeniis10 on Jun 13, 2013 15:41:09 GMT -5
There's no accounting for crazy, but unfortunately they can frequently be productive members of society. That makes it a bit scarier because they are smart and have resources. So very true. This guy has a pilots license . He flys aircraft for a living now. My ex is now a deputy for the sheriff's department! Yep, it's actually worse for them to have jobs and resources at their disposal. (That response wasn't meant to imply "top that"! We just are all in shock that he got this job a few years ago and we are all VERY watchful of him.)
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Jun 13, 2013 15:57:54 GMT -5
So very true. This guy has a pilots license . He flys aircraft for a living now. My ex is now a deputy for the sheriff's department! Yep, it's actually worse for them to have jobs and resources at their disposal. (That response wasn't meant to imply "top that"! We just are all in shock that he got this job a few years ago and we are all VERY watchful of him.) I used to work for a law enforcement agency, and I am not shocked by his hiring at all, sad to say. Yes, he did go through psychological and mental health testing, no doubt. But someone who is truly sociopathic can beat the tests. And as Mich pointed out, can also be a very intelligent, charming and high-functioning sort; basically, someone whom an employer would very much like to have. I met more than my share of abuse in uniform, including one individual who threatened anyone who got in his way, up to and including using physical force. He still works on the force. In fact, he's been promoted a few times. But I know one day, he will either snap or get smacked down by someone bigger and madder.
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doxieluvr
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Post by doxieluvr on Jun 13, 2013 16:05:07 GMT -5
I don't know to worry for her or just be thankful he no longer stalks me. That's the thing: it's not like if you successfully get away from these crazies that they learn and stop their behavior. They just move on to someone else. Sadly, that's one of the reasons it took me so long to divorce my first husband. I felt guilty that he'd treat another unsuspecting woman the same way. But, my safety came first. I've now seem him put 2 other women through the same hell I went through and now he's onto his third... Ain't that the truth. I think this guy has had the same girl for at least the last 10 years or he picks similar looking girls. i wrote his SSN in my important papers file, in case something happens to me, and only try to keep tabs on what he drives. I try to scope out parking lots before I run into a store. Only a few times have I ran into him, in the last 17 years. He still creeps me out. Unfortunately he did move to my town many years ago, instead of a neighboring town that he use to reside in.
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happyhoix
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Post by happyhoix on Jun 13, 2013 16:22:13 GMT -5
I had an office mate whose boyfriend broke up with her.
She took to driving by his house all the time, looking to see if there were other cars in the driveway. She didn't think he broke up with her in order to date someone else, but she just wanted to keep tabs to see when he did start dating again.
She saw him at a public place (a music venue) with another woman and followed him through the crowd for the rest of the evening, studying her at a distance.
When I asked her why she did that, she said she always monitored her ex-boyfriends after she broke up with them, because she wanted to see who they dated next, in order to compare the new girlfriend to her, to see how they measured up to her. She was surprised when I told her I never did that, and she wanted to know how I could stand to just let the guy go like that.
I don't know - I guess I'm not crazy?
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Jun 13, 2013 17:07:27 GMT -5
My moms stepson is working at a prison, carrying a gun! He held a screwdriver to her throat and threatened her life! She called the sherif and there's a report of that but he still got a job. Of course he also joined the marines so they must not check, either.
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Tennesseer
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Post by Tennesseer on Jun 13, 2013 17:13:33 GMT -5
I had an office mate whose boyfriend broke up with her. She took to driving by his house all the time, looking to see if there were other cars in the driveway. She didn't think he broke up with her in order to date someone else, but she just wanted to keep tabs to see when he did start dating again. She saw him at a public place (a music venue) with another woman and followed him through the crowd for the rest of the evening, studying her at a distance. When I asked her why she did that, she said she always monitored her ex-boyfriends after she broke up with them, because she wanted to see who they dated next, in order to compare the new girlfriend to her, to see how they measured up to her. She was surprised when I told her I never did that, and she wanted to know how I could stand to just let the guy go like that. I don't know - I guess I'm not crazy? I knew someone whose girlfriend broke up with him. She refused to get back together with him and then refused to take his calls. He began stalking her too. This guy had a single engine aircraft license. To punish her, he crashed his airplane into her family's house. No one was killed but him.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 13, 2013 23:42:05 GMT -5
Nancy & mmmhm have the right of it!
Law Enforcement does not do enough even when there are restraining orders. The craxy fuxxers get thrown in jail for the night and the judges reprimand them and let them out again.
We had one event where the stalker/abuser really angered the officer. He wrote up 44 infractions. It got pled down to 2 & no fine even though he missed court a couple times - pathetic!!! Meanwhile no one can have a life or job because of the crazy dude.
I don't like guns in the house because of the small kids, but we all have them now. Kids will get lessons as soon as they are old enough to handle it.
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Jun 14, 2013 9:50:40 GMT -5
My moms stepson is working at a prison, carrying a gun! He held a screwdriver to her throat and threatened her life! She called the sherif and there's a report of that but he still got a job. Of course he also joined the marines so they must not check, either. In my earlier post, I never suggested they did not check. On the contrary, law enforcement (including corrections) does check arrest records (regardless of whether there was a prosecution resulting) and does run psychological profile testing. I said that a sociopath can (and does) beat the tests and gets through the process. There are plenty of examples of officers gone horribly bad, to the point of committing murder, yet made it onto a police force or into a prison to work. I'ver personally known a few, and some of them are currently serving time on the wrong side of the bars at the moment. As I mentioned on the background check thread, records can be expunged, depending on the type of record, where it happened and how long ago. In that case, the record absolutely cannot be used or considered for employment purposes. And in the above case, if no prosecution resulted from the report, then there is no case. I'm not saying this is fair. I'm saying it is the law. To stay on topic somewhat here: domestic violence cases can be expunged, depending on the disposition, jurisdiction and amount of time that has passed since the commission of the crime, as well as the age of the perpetrator. The court personnel still have record of the expunged case(s), but the public cannot see them. I'm not in favor of it, since it's the pattern of an abuser that's critical, among other things. But I don't make the rules.
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formerroomate99
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Post by formerroomate99 on Jun 14, 2013 10:50:12 GMT -5
My stepbrother is on the force. He said he got several cases where the woman would claim the guy voilated the restraining order when the police knew for a fact that the guy was someplace else (probably arresting him for something).
The problem with restraining orders is that crazy people and vindictive ex girlfriends can file them too, and it's hard to tell the difference between a legitimate abuse vicitm and a loon because nobody is at their best under those circumstances. And if they set the bar too high for a restraining order, then a lot of legitimate abuse victims wouldn't be able to get them. So it's all a balancing act.
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8 Bit WWBG
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Post by 8 Bit WWBG on Jun 15, 2013 14:48:48 GMT -5
...:::"The genius trooper put the stuff on the hood of his cruiser while he was doing everything. The guy in this equation drove by and the girl says to the trooper, "there's the guy and that license plate isn't for that car". Trooper jumps in the car and takes off after the guy. Weed and pipe fly into the road and get run over repeatedly. She got lucky and skated on the possession charge.":::...
I wonder if it was the same trooper who starred in the "click it or ticket" ad. He does love pickup trucks.
...:::"You say that NOW, while everything's just hunky dory, but wait until your wife drops that zero and gets with a new hero after burning through all of your cash.":::...
Very apt. Its easy to dismiss vindictive behavior when things are awesome. But I could totally see someone who felt like his life was ruined trying to do the same to her.
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deantrip
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Joined: Feb 27, 2012 19:05:42 GMT -5
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Post by deantrip on Jun 15, 2013 16:10:17 GMT -5
The other thing about officers and the military is they want people who can be aggressive and hounding in pursuit of their goal, so they look for some of those traits and then try to train them to use them for the military's gain or various agency's gain. Not always the case, but definitely one of the things they look at.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 15, 2013 16:28:49 GMT -5
It's all about the catch. I suppose women do this, too? lone, That 's a great question. I think both sexes can display that kind of hostility toward to their opposite sex. I think when "self love" is missing from one's heart it's impossible to love others. To me,love has come first it within you to understand meaning of love. In that way you can able to receive and give in same time.
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