susanb
Well-Known Member
Joined: Jun 21, 2012 14:16:56 GMT -5
Posts: 1,430
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Post by susanb on Jun 13, 2013 2:16:02 GMT -5
Last bridesmaid gig I paid airfare, car rental, hotel, dress & full time nanny for my kids while i was gone. I was a single parent without any extra $s. I did it because it was so important that I be there for my friend. And then I found out that bride/groom had footed the entire travel, wardrobe, hotel bill for the best man. I can't tell you how upset that I was that they covered the bill for a single working guy . . . can't say the friendship was ever the same after that. In true YM fashion, you don't mess with my money Ouch. Yeah, single parents should be shown extra respect when it comes to time or money IMO. I don't view that as a YM thing, but as a person who is aware of the realities of this world thing....
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deantrip
Established Member
Joined: Feb 27, 2012 19:05:42 GMT -5
Posts: 405
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Post by deantrip on Jun 13, 2013 8:13:28 GMT -5
When I got married 7 years ago, we paid for the tux rentals and the dresses for the wedding party (dresses were maid by my SIL). Any other weddings that I have been part of the groom usually paid for the tux rental, not sure about the bridesmaids side.
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greeniis10
Well-Known Member
Joined: May 9, 2012 12:27:09 GMT -5
Posts: 1,834
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Post by greeniis10 on Jun 13, 2013 13:03:07 GMT -5
Every time I have been a bridesmaid I paid for my own dress and shoes. Every time my husband has been in a wedding party, he has paid for his own tux. Same for us...the bride or groom never paid for anything and in the past 5 years we've each been in at least 2 weddings / year. But we have received some gifts from some brides or grooms to show their appreciation. See, this is the part I don't get? The needless exchange of "token" gifts. Why give your wedding party gifts when they are expected to fork out for their clothes that you (the bride and groom) are dictating them to wear? Just skip the silly gifts and give them each a small amount towards their clothing. I'm just against the whole commercialization of weddings anyway. I was recently at an engagement party (which I also feel is unecessary) and everyone who was invited brought gifts for the bride and groom. Nevermind the upcoming showers, bachlor / bachlorette parties, wedding reception, etc. that will also "require" gifts. Then, the bride & groom gave gifts to each of their wedding party just for being in the wedding. JMHO but it all seems so wasteful.
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Queen of Interesting Nuts
Familiar Member
"In the end, we remember not the words of our enemies but the silence of our friends"
Joined: Feb 14, 2013 11:05:35 GMT -5
Posts: 700
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Post by Queen of Interesting Nuts on Jun 13, 2013 18:12:31 GMT -5
'nother question....
We (or I) have never opened gifts at a birthday party. DD is having a BBQ baby shower and I guess she wasn't going to open them at the time either, but in this case it's kinda the point right?
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Deleted
Joined: Oct 6, 2024 8:34:01 GMT -5
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Jun 13, 2013 18:53:08 GMT -5
Everyone I know opens the gifts at the shower. It is the main event so to speak. Everyone gets to ooh and ahhh over what everyone else gifted them and she gets to thank you. Just be discreet with cash gifts, not announcing the amount.
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Queen of Interesting Nuts
Familiar Member
"In the end, we remember not the words of our enemies but the silence of our friends"
Joined: Feb 14, 2013 11:05:35 GMT -5
Posts: 700
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Post by Queen of Interesting Nuts on Jun 13, 2013 18:56:34 GMT -5
Blarghhh I hate opening gifts at the party. Well not that I will be opening them, maybe more ooohing and ahhhing with baby gifts I suppose.
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Tennesseer
Member Emeritus
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 21:58:42 GMT -5
Posts: 64,488
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Post by Tennesseer on Jun 13, 2013 19:35:16 GMT -5
My favorite (and most hilarious) scene in the movie was the bridal shop scene right after their group lunch. Maya Rudolph losing 'it' in the middle of the street was the icing on the cake.
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heartvolunteer
New Member
Joined: Mar 28, 2012 12:47:53 GMT -5
Posts: 48
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Post by heartvolunteer on Jun 14, 2013 12:39:02 GMT -5
I dunno - I did 8 weddings in 5 years. Only two of the dresses were specifically my pick. The bride chose color and length for one of them (I was the ONLY attendant besides the best man) and for the other - it was a groom making the choice, since I was his groomsman. To help him out, I picked several black and white dresses, modeled them for him, and he picked it. Thankfully I didn't have to match the bridesmaids - they were wearing a weird shade of mint green. The other 6 weddings, all long dresses, needing alterations of course, along with shoes. I got to reuse the shoes for a couple since they were standard white or black, but even the silver open toed sandals got some extra usage! I paid for all of them. And having my hair done. Did my own darn makeup for all but one of them. Don't forget the manicures and pedicures. All the traveling. The hotels. The showers (because I kept getting invited to multiples - different areas of the state, different families, etc.) I have been able to wear a couple of the dresses again, but mostly not. I donated them. Now I have real ballgowns, of my choosing, that I wear to all the Heart Association Heart Balls. I have three I use in rotation. I like to think I have better taste for these than the traditional bridesmaids gowns, despite the fact they're both long and formal. And cheaper. OMG. The cost!! I tell myself that I'll pick something different if I choose to get married. Another thing was all the wedding gifts - my gift to almost all happy couples lately (except the first two, because I wasn't crocheting yet) has been handmade crocheted blankets. I let them choose the color and then I make it. I have yet to have an unhappy bridal couple with one of these suckers. They actually, one and all, report back on what they're using it for. Not just in the thank you card after the wedding kind of way. No, I did NOT ask them to do that - once it leaves my possession, it's theirs...but they all giggle and laugh and tell me stories about how they're using it. Two of them are still, get this, posting pictures of it on Facebook. The blanket has been in their possession for SIX years now. And they're still talking about it. *shakes head* Two other couples, when I went to visit for various holidays, grabbed me out of whatever room I was in, and dragged me to whatever room the blanket was in to show it being used. AND they were still excited about them !!! I'm glad they like them though. It's not like it's Great-Aunt Eunice's old toilet paper doily cover. Doing this gives me pleasure, them warmth, plus it's gotten me out of the mess of registration lists.
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