STUFF versus EXPERIENCES?

[Robert not Bobby]

I hadn’t realized how much stuff I (we) have accumulated…good stuff, frivolous stuff, useful stuff, useless stuff…pretty stuff. You get the idea. But there is a big yard sale a comin. Sometimes you want to get rid of stuff you don’t need.

No, I’m not a hoarder; probably more neat than I need to be. Still, I don’t like to throw things out that are functional or have a sentimental value and meaning…or can be repurposed into something else.

So, I do have an attachment of sorts, to some things.

In the other corner is Experience.

Experience a great cruise up to Alaska (a colleague of mine just came back from one and is insanely in love with the Alaskan landscape, the waters and the city of Vancouver): a safari; traveling to Europe (I have been more than a few times), hanging out in some café in Montparnasse in Paris, pretending to write something more meaningful than a postcard…or the Spanish Steps in Rome, or some donkey ride up the hillside of a Greek Island, where two stunningly beautiful Spanish ladies wondered around all day in their black bras and panties. Or that old Chinese guy paining those amazing portraits on the Ponte Vecchio in Florence?

Actually, with the exception of London, I really don’t like the big European capitals as much as the smaller cities and larger Towns…Heidelberg, Oxford, Siena, Interlaken, Marbella, etc.

Of course, I’m forgetting all of those unforgettable human on human experiences we have…

Stuff can be useful or not, but eventually it gets old. Experiences can be fleeting, but they stay with you forever.

So, stuff or experiences…it has to be either or.

What say you?

[Apple]

I'm an experiences person.  Yes, there is some "stuff" that would be nice to have, but I'd rather spend my time and money going somewhere/doing something.  My first overseas trip I wanted some "stuff" to bring home as souvenirs, but the last two times I'm thrilled with sending a postcard home every day, squishing a few souvenir pennies, and buying a magnet for the fridge.  Any more than that is just too much stuff.

So, I try not to buy too much and save my money to go somewhere (I did buy a nice camera to take pictures, and that's lead me to going out more, taking little detours on the way home to see if I can take a picture of something cool).

[GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl]

I try really hard to be an experiences person.

But stuff often offers far more immediate gratification.  

That said, we did down size our stuff significantly when we moved a few years ago.  Still, there is more to get rid of.  And YDS LOVES the current run of shows about Alaska on the Discovery channel.  

Gotta go delete an open online shopping bag page I've been contemplating for a few days....

[cktc]

If I have to choose, experiences, but most of the stuff I have is intertwined with experiences, and a lot of my experiences don’t rate.

[Deleted]

Definitely experiences.  We have what we need in the house; we don't redecorate, we replace only what falls apart and can't be fixed.  We have electronic toys but not the latest and not a ton of them.  Heck, we have only one car.  I'm a bit extravagant on my work wardrobe and my jewelry but it's more quality than quantity and I wear things till they fall apart.

Experiences:  in 16 years together, the last 10 married, we've amassed a lifetime of stories.  Brazil.  Alaska.  Paris just last month.  Dubrovnik.  Rome.  St. Petersburg.  Patmos.  Budapest.  Edinburgh and the Orkneys.  We'd sell our stuff if we had to to buy more plane tickets.

[giramomma]

Experiences: Travel, classes, college, camps, whatever.

I find the more kids I have, the more of a minimalist I become.

[8 Bit WWBG]

...:::"squishing a few souvenir pennies,":::...

These are great!  Easy to store, but unique.  My Mom liked to buy pencils.

[Formerly SK]

I think it depends.  If I only had one pair of shoes I'd probably want another pair before I'd choose to go on a trip.  If my only furniture was a 20yo bean bag chair and TV tray, I'd probably want some furniture.  But, once I've achieved my "stability level of stuff" travel would be more appealing.  The issue is what my "stability level of stuff" is, and everyone has a different level.

[archrival]

The ultimate question of something is worth.

Because you can spend $5k for a week's vacay to Disneyland or save that $5k and

According to my Phil Script, a lump sum investment of $5,000.00 bearing an annual return of 11% could grow to $114,461.48 in 30 years!

So is that $5k of Mickey Mousing worth $114k to your retirement fund??  Hmmm....

[Robert not Bobby]

Jun 7, 2013 17:14:20 GMT -5 Formerly SK said:

I think it depends.  If I only had one pair of shoes I'd probably want another pair before I'd choose to go on a trip.  If my only furniture was a 20yo bean bag chair and TV tray, I'd probably want some furniture.  But, once I've achieved my "stability level of stuff" travel would be more appealing.  The issue is what my "stability level of stuff" is, and everyone has a different level.

Yes SK...sadly, these are first world problems.

But you are absolutely right...everything has to be put in context.

Also, you should mention the differences between basic needs and wants...and the difference is........................?

Look, I didn't want this to get too introspective, just an evaluation of our priorities?

Maybe I missed the mark, maybe not?

Keep the conversation going, if you choose.


Good night all...I'm going to get frivolous.

[Peace Of Mind]

My stuff gives me great experiences.  I prefer being experienced.  At stuff. 

[Spellbound454]

Stuff.....
I'm always decorating

One room at a time... and by the time I get to the end its time to start again.... never cluttered though, can't stand mess of any description.

[toomuchreality]

Jun 7, 2013 17:59:35 GMT -5 Peace Of Mind said:

My stuff gives me great experiences.  I prefer being experienced.  At stuff. 

I'm with POM on this one.
I prefer being experienced too... with all my stuff!

All my stuff is really good stuff. I NEED all my stuff!  -Just ask me!

[Apple]

Jun 7, 2013 17:30:50 GMT -5 archrival said:

The ultimate question of something is worth.

Because you can spend $5k for a week's vacay to Disneyland or save that $5k and

According to my Phil Script, a lump sum investment of $5,000.00 bearing an annual return of 11% could grow to $114,461.48 in 30 years!

So is that $5k of Mickey Mousing worth $114k to your retirement fund??  Hmmm....

Well, I already save for my retirement, already save for other things, already have an emergency fund...  I don't have car payments, don't have credit card payments, don't have cable, rarely eat out... So, do I really need another $114k in my retirement fund?  Maybe, but, since I'm already saving for that, I don't see why I shouldn't spend a few thousand every few years on travel.  I also want to enjoy the here-and-now. 

Now, that answer *should* be different for someone who's not saving.

I want to enjoy all my stages in life.  I try to save enough now to take care of myself later, but I don't want to sacrifice so much I regret it.  In less than a year and a half I've worked around 600 hours of OT.  Some of that extra money is going to be for fun, with my son, before he is fully grown.

So for me, yes, the once-every-few-years big travel expense is worth it (although, there is only one time I broke that $5k mark, usually I keep it around $2k-$3k).

[midjd]

I'm someone who prefers to spend a lazy weekend at home rather than travel, so I'd probably lean toward stuff. Vacationing is fun, but neither of us makes it a priority. (I know vacations aren't the only type of experiences you can have, but it seems like these discussions always focus on trips).

I also think the "stuff" often makes experiences more enjoyable.

And are we making the "stuff vs experiences" comparison based on cost only?  Most of my best memories are from things we've done that were free.

[Deleted]

Stuff comes first. I want a car and house and clothes and food, and I want better than the cheapest available. Once I have all that I want to go to shows and travel etc. The girls have bikes which are both stuff and experiences. Sorry, I can't do an either/or.

[Knee Deep in Water Chloe]

 I suppose I'm more stuff.
However, when it comes to gifts for our kids and ourselves, we strive for experiences. 

[Deleted]

Experience over stuff.

[sesfw]

'So is that $5k of Mickey Mousing worth $114k to your retirement fund??'

Depends on your age and family status.  If I still had kids, the 5K Mouse would take priority over future funds in retirement.  I would be young enough to put funds away but the family memories will last long after you are gone.

Me?  I prefer experiences to more stuff.  In fact I think everyone should move every 5 years just to clean the stuff out of our homes.  DH's DW#1 loved stuff and had their basement so full of 'extra stuff' that very narrow paths were between shelves.  I'm a minimalist.

[Gardening Grandma]

Jun 8, 2013 8:48:15 GMT -5 sesfw said:

'So is that $5k of Mickey Mousing worth $114k to your retirement fund??'

Depends on your age and family status.  

It absolutely depends.  I probably don't have 30 years and I don't wish to live like a miser.  We aren't rich, but I think we have enough to be secure.  So I'd rather spend that $5K on experiences.

I don't remember the stuff I owned in 1990, but I do remember the first international trip DH and I took to Egypt.  We have the photographs and shared memories.

Stuff can get lost or stolen.  Eventually it wears out or I get tired of it.  Experiences are with me the rest of my life.

[svwashout]

I think one of the advantages of "stuff" is when it has high resale value and doesn't cost much to keep.  Bonus points if it can sell quickly. I imagine it's more difficult to monetize experience, except for maybe education or training.  I don't know anyone who's getting significant income from their homemade travel videos or novels they wrote based on their travels.

My brother had a large bump in income a decade back that lasted only a few years. He spent most of it on a mixture of stuff and experiences.  When the golden goose stopped laying, he was able to recoup his outlay for most of the stuff (houses did very well, cars not so much, furniture just pennies on the dollar), but what he paid for experiences is gone forever.

Stuff that gets old sometimes increases in value.  If he had bought really good antique furniture like my aunt had the habit of accumulating, that part could have worked out better financially.  But I guess like with artwork or other collectibles you have to know what you're doing.

[sesfw]

'what he paid for experiences is gone forever.'

The funds may be gone but the memories are forever.

[Deleted]

I either liked, or needed all of the material possessions I've accumulated in my lifetime, but- Periodically I sift through my 'stuff' for the purposes of making decisions of what to do or who to give them away to.

I have experienced all of my stuff. 

At this stage of life though, I am into experiencing more, than gathering more. When I do gather more 'stuff' I've become quite selective in the items I choose to bring home with me. Meaning. I would like to have a real life story, experienced, to go along with my selections.

[Deleted]

At this point in my life (51) I'm acutely aware of being "owned" by stuff! 

Add in dealing with disposing of a couple of parents' "stuff" in the last 10 years with the likely passing of a third in the next couple of years (a 3000 sq.ft. house stuffed with "stuff"), I feel like my job is "stuff management".




Travel can provide a nice break and give you a different perspective. But after about two weeks we miss home and being around our "stuff".