muttleynfelix
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Post by muttleynfelix on Jul 13, 2011 15:15:19 GMT -5
Sheila - I think that is the size my truck tires were. My co-worker's fiance is the office manager of her dad's tire shop. When I got new tires last summer, they did it for me and got the best deal possible... it was still $700 with the alingment. Apparently that size is being phased out!!!! We were actually looking for used tires, but you can't find them in that size.
Today was a spend. At work, our client bought a half built subdivision that was the original construction was started in 2006. They are finishing up the first phase (6 new houses and one exisiting). They are building a new sanitary lift station for the city and they went to tie into the old one and the original plans (not designed by us) were wrong. LIke 8 feet vertically wrong! So, my survey crew and I went out there at 11 and reengineered it on site. Then we got lunch at my favorite spot in that town and then one of the guys and I went out to the horse farm to measure the spring flows (my favorite part of the month, something new and different). At least it isn't 100 today. We get a few days in the 90s before the 100s come back. Fun FUn.
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dakota4600
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Post by dakota4600 on Jul 13, 2011 15:18:32 GMT -5
AZmom- I know how you are feeling with DH recovery from surgery. It seems like there is three times as much to do without his help. There are lots of things that are getting done only when necessary, like laundry. I did my first load of laundry since mini-D was born (at least I can't remember doing it any other time.) I'm hoping he gets cleared to drive and start doing light lifting. I realize I may have to mow next time, but luckily yesterday was the first time it rained in a week and it has been so hot the grass doesn't want to grow.
Shelia- WOW on the cost of those tires. I think last time I had tires put on it was like $600 total.
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startsmart
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Post by startsmart on Jul 13, 2011 16:05:17 GMT -5
Sheila- thanks for the reminder not to neglect my car savings account! I just hit 75,000 miles on my toyota and need to get the service done soon. I refuse to go back to the dealer because when I did my 30,000 miles done they told me it was ninetynineninetynine in that quick, I don't have time to give you a proper quote voice. I got there and it was FIVE ninety-nine, ninety-nine. Oh boy was I pissy. Now I would have tore the quote up and tore into that sales manager like nobody's business. Back then I paid and yelled. Messages- oh trust me, sometimes I do get an email that makes me particularly relaxed or amused. But in this case it was a massage I think my mom is coming up later this week and then it's Harry Potter time! So very excited for this last movie!
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ses
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Post by ses on Jul 13, 2011 17:02:42 GMT -5
Does anyone have any experience with a vita mix blender? $550 is a whale of a lot of money for a mixer, but the ability to grind my own fresh whole wheat flour is enticing as is the ability to make a small amount hot soup. I suppose now that I have a job I could start a savings account for the next time they show up as a special on QVC.
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mizbear
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Stand back. I have a budget, and I know how to use it.
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Post by mizbear on Jul 13, 2011 17:06:47 GMT -5
I second shan- bruises are definitely more painful than breaks!
And thanks everyone for their support. I am breathing a somewhat sigh of relief tonight as I clean in between bits at the computer. Supposed to be resting but I have my nieces tomorrow and Friday and a bug guy coming Friday- the beetles are coming- and it's not Ringo, George, Paul and John!!!
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ses
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Post by ses on Jul 13, 2011 18:36:21 GMT -5
moneysquirrel--I just made the most horrendous discovery! You can buy chocolate covered sunflower seeds on-line at nutsonline.com. Oh how I wish I didn't know this.
sapphire--While I was cleaning out my car after yesterday's shopping expedition, I found a small camera case. Is it the one momsapphire couldn't find? Let me know and I will send it your way.
MK-- is there any new word on the Minnesota shutdown?
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DVM gone riding
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Post by DVM gone riding on Jul 13, 2011 23:46:56 GMT -5
2 more csd for me. NowI need to go back and figure were I am at. Should have got out the star stickers like someone said!! And I guess I need to go through and read more!
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zippy478
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Post by zippy478 on Jul 14, 2011 7:11:44 GMT -5
FINALLY FINALLY FINALLY succeeded and had a no-spend day yesterday! YAY ME! LOL...let's see how today goes....
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sapphire12
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Post by sapphire12 on Jul 14, 2011 8:02:18 GMT -5
Morning all -- It was beautiful this morning. We have severe thunderstorms yesterday that took away the humidity. Ahh, I enjoyed my walk so much more this morning in 69 degrees.
SES -- I will ask mom about the camera case. She's in ATL this week. I'll get back to you shortly. Thanks!
zippy -- congrats on your 1st NS!!!!!!!!!!
Sheila -- I don't know if you or someone you know has a Costco membership, but Costco has Bridgestone Tires $70 off a set of 4 and $30 of the installation of 4.
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muttleynfelix
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Post by muttleynfelix on Jul 14, 2011 8:21:52 GMT -5
OK I'm being a bum tonight. DH's Aunt is in town visiting MIL. We have not seen her since our wedding almost 6 years ago. We are going to her daughter's wedding Oct 1st. DH and his mom haven't been connecting a whole lot lately. So, MIL calls last night and has me talk to DH's Aunt. I say why don't you come out after DS's nap and then stay for supper. So, that sounds like a plan. DH and I were looking around the house and it was like well we have a package of meatballs. Lets do spaghetti and meatballs. Kind of boring (and totally prepackaged, but oh well). I know we are out of parmesean cheese, but I start looking and we having no Spaghetti noodles or Spaghetti sauce! I have no idea how that happened. I thought I had a new package of noodles! So, domestic goddesses, I'm serving Spaghetti w/Meatballs, french bread, salad (with lettuce from my garden), frozen fruit cups (left over from the 4th) and I need something for desert. Any ideas what I should pick up for desert while I'm at the grocery store?
DH and DS are going to the zoo this morning (we have a membership). The'll only stay for about an hour. They can hit about a 1/3 of the zoo in that time. So, they'll be done by 10 and it will still be relatively cool at that point.
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dakota4600
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Post by dakota4600 on Jul 14, 2011 8:45:23 GMT -5
Morning all- Well yesterday was a NS. Yeah me! Total now at 3NS, 2CS and 9NEO. Not too bad.
It is so muggy here that I got out of the car this AM and my glasses fogged up. I really want to take mini-D to the zoo this weekend, but we'd have to make it a really quick trip, because of the heat. But they just opened the sky safari and I'd love to go take him on that, we have membership that includes, the carousel, train, tram, boat and sky safari, so we might as well use it. We'll see how I feel on Saturday AM.
Anyway tonight is DH's followup appt, hopefully the doctor says he is cleared to start driving and doing more. This morning DH almost gave me a heart attack. I was in the shower and evidently lost in thought, because I didn't hear him come upstairs or open any doors and all of a sudden I see movement outside the shower and I screamed. He felt really bad for scaring me, he was just coming to ask me if I wanted him to get mini-D up.
Muttley- I don't think that meal sounds bad at all. Couldn't the frozen fruit cups be dessert with a little whipped cream on them? then just fix a canned or frozen veggie for a side?
Zippy- Yeah on the NS day!
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shanendoah
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Post by shanendoah on Jul 14, 2011 9:37:27 GMT -5
I'm at 6 CS and 3 NS and have already used 3 of the 4 spend days I allow a month. Tuesday DH went and had lunch with most of his classmates after class, then we all went to Olive Garden for dinner. We only got the soup, so it was under $25 for the 3 of us, but still a spend. Yesterday, we had a friend come over and decided to do chicken and waffles again, but we needed stuff for the waffles, so we had to run to the store for that. Today should (and I say should) be a gas only no spend. DH will be filling up our car and I'll be filling up the DC's car, as I've been the one driving it.
I am probably going to be a "bad" board member for a little while. I've been reading and following along, but I don't know how much commenting I'll be doing. In my heart and head I am supporting you all, but life here has gotten stressful and my emotional energy is pretty low. The MIL fell in the shower again. We got a call from her apartment complex- either she gets a caretaker or she gets kicked out. Not that they told her this. They told her they could install better rails in the bathroom. HELLO? She's a legal adult. I am NOT her guardian. I have financial DPOA and am an emergency contact, but I'm pretty certain that state law would say that telling me you'll kick her out (and not telling her) does not qualify as appropriate notice. However, the problem will be fixed, soon. She has a pre-op appointment for her total knee replacement surgery on Friday. We're working on having that happen ASAP. I mentioned that to the apartment lady and she said that didn't matter. So, I said can I get a caretaker until the surgery and then re-evaluate once she can walk again? They agreed to that. So now, on top of trying to figure out everything for the surgery (and how that will be paid for- luckily, we have built up a large medical fund for her) we also find a reputable caretaker to come in 3-4 times a week to help her with bathing. (The only time she falls is getting out of the shower.) And of course, most of this is falling on me because I work in the medical profession, but also because DH is in his last week of intense summer school and is trying to get his final project done. He will be going to the pre-op appointment tomorrow, but that's about it. And, of course, we're getting a litte tired of the constant threats of "we'll kick her out" relayed only to us, and not to her. So we're back to considering trying to buy a condo or small house that she can rent from us.
Anyway, that's where I am.
mizbear: I know you have it worse, and I am really, really pulling for you to remain on your own. I think I agree with the friends and family who say it might be good for you to move away once you're done with school.
zippy & dvm: I feel like I've been letting two of our newest members down by not being as supportive as I should be. You're both doing great. Its all about becoming aware of how/why/when you spend and then trying to make changes. It takes a few months. You're both doing great.
And yeah, that awareness of how/why/when you spend- I'm still shooting for my goals this month. At this point, I'm not exactly expecting to meet them. I'll be happy if we come close.
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startsmart
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Post by startsmart on Jul 14, 2011 11:25:57 GMT -5
Shenan- I know how you're feeling, there's a lot to deal with for your MIL and that takes priority.
For me it's this screwed up work situation. I am so tired of saying "I can't do everything" then not being heard or understood and then getting laid up with massive amounts of guilt for things not getting done.
So over it.
Add in the joy of making more in my first year of freelancing than I ever thought possible and I'm just tired of the back and forth.
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mizbear
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Stand back. I have a budget, and I know how to use it.
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Post by mizbear on Jul 14, 2011 11:40:55 GMT -5
VENT/RANT! OMG! This acquaintance of mine (not a friend- she is a PAIN- she thinks she is my ONLY friend and the best one at that) will not respect my request not to discuss my family with her. She complains constantly about everything with her own family and puts down all of my efforts. She talks down to me. She also doesn't get that I don't want someone's company all the time. She can bust on my family for taking my time, but she does the same every chance she gets. She wants to go to the talent shows with me- my nieces can't stand her. My other friends are all liked by my friends and family. Aye-yi-yi!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 14, 2011 11:46:22 GMT -5
Shan, it sounds like you need to get her out of there. I would not trust them, if they won't follow the laws. Is there anything I can do to help?
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mizbear
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Post by mizbear on Jul 14, 2011 12:46:24 GMT -5
Shan, I re-read your post and then went over my lease since I live in subsidized housing. I couldn't find anything where they could kick you out for falling- just where they could file a report with Adult Protective Services. Protective Services can remove someone for their own safety.
I agree with gin- I think you should give notice and get her out. Anything I can do either?
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3catslady
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Post by 3catslady on Jul 14, 2011 17:17:00 GMT -5
12 NSD/CSD, 1 SD, 1 EOD. That is 14 days so far and only the middle of the month. I have been really struggling with the spending because I want to go to Pizza Hut and BK and my favorite restaurant so bad. But I am holding out. I want to get a really good month before I try to get a full No Spend Month. I am stocking up on food stuffs so I can do that.
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mizbear
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Stand back. I have a budget, and I know how to use it.
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Post by mizbear on Jul 14, 2011 17:45:43 GMT -5
I got the living daylights scared out of me at dinner! My younger niece got choked on a mussel (she had never had them before) and I tried to do the heimlich maneuver and could not get it dislodged. The man sitting behind us was an EMT and was able to get it where she could swallow it. I did not have the upper body strength to help her. I certified in first aid - including choking first aid- for the first time in elementary school- I felt so helpless. My mom used to be a first responder. Poor kid- all she could say was- I'm so embarassed! All I can say is- I'm glad he was there...
And my brother was actually cool about it when he found out- just wanted to make sure she was ok- when he found out she was ok- he was fine.
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Honeylioness
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Post by Honeylioness on Jul 15, 2011 8:08:35 GMT -5
shanendoah - So sorry to hear you are going through such a stressful time.
Is this a special type of apartment complex or one where anyone can rent?
And how did they know she had fallen anyway? Did she call someone or did someone hear her?
I agree with the others who said that unless there are written rules and guidelines in place PRIOR to this incident - that the property managers can evict a tenant for a physical disability, which is what you MIL has, AND your MIL signed such an agreement - then they are setting themselves up for a lawsuit under the American With Disabilities Act. I would also point out to them that they could also be asking for a discrimination charge filed against them. Trust me, AARP would be more than happy to assist in that as there is more elder discrimination than people believe.
startsmart - You really need to get over feeling guilty. I know it took me a long time to get to that place with a lot of situations. Now I only have it with my Mom!
My impression, from what you have shared about some of the people you work with, is that you may be dealing with five-year olds. Reasoning doesn't work with them, just ask any mother here. So let me give you a couple of ideas for coping.
1) You need to set out some FIRM time frames. You work with client A from 8-9am. Client B from 10-11:30am etc. When their time is up, or when a conference call has reached it's allotted time - you gently but firmly say: "I apologize, but we need to end. I have another meeting to attend."
2) When you have conference calls - is there a posted agenda before hand? If not you have to start making one. And then STICK TO IT. So perhaps:
Recap of last meeting: 5 mintues Update on Action Items: 15 minutes Outline/Discuss new project: 30 minutes Wrap up/Confirm new Action Items: 10 minutes
When conversations or discussions start wandering off topic say "I know this is something you feel strongly about. Why don't you send me an e-mail off-line" then steer the talk back to the agenda item. Keep a clock nearby and when you reach the allotted time say "I see this will need further discussion. Let's plan on covering it in our next meeting" then move to the next thing.
3) Finally, remembering these are children (at least in my mind) don't let them push you to do more than is possible or is good for you. Offer them a choice: "This project is rather extensive and is going to require additional resources. I can complete either Part A or Part D this week. What would work best for you?"
If they come back with "But I want it ALL done this week" just firmly but gently repeat "I can complete either Part A or Part D this week. What would work best for you?"
If they push back again you reply "Okay, then Part A it is."
You should not be expected to be Super Woman!!!
mizbear - I know confrontation is hard for most people - but with everything else going on in your life you really don't need this acquaintance around.
The next time she talks down to you I would look her in the eye and say "I really don't know where you got the idea that you can talk to me like dog shit, but it stops NOW."
If she pushes about you sharing information that is none of her business my response would be "I don't remember asking for your opinion." Or how about "I'll tell you only after you give me free access to your budget, bills and bank accounts." That last one should shut her up.
You need to come up with three or four things you can say and say them consistently so she gets the message. If all else fails you will need to just tell her "X, I do not want you to call or contact me anymore. I know more than enough manipulative and dysfunctional people. I don't need one more. Good-Bye"
And glad to hear your niece is okay.
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mizbear
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Post by mizbear on Jul 15, 2011 8:30:00 GMT -5
Honey- I love you responses so much better than my- "I'm sorry, I think my phone is dying." and "I have to go, I have another call coming in" LOL You're right- I do hate confrontation, but I absolutely do not need anymore loose screws in my life. Niece is sore today but back to her goofy self. Swears she will never eat a mussel again unless it has been pureed. ;D DGM now has pneumonia. I haven't told anyone, but I hope they caught it early. Summer pneumonia in someone like my DGM is notoriously bad news. Bug guy is coming. Wish he would get here and gone. I have things to do today- like mop! I hate mopping before he comes in. He tracks bug goo- I'm not stupid- I lived in apartments pretty much my whole life- I'm not mopping before he comes in! DUH! Everyone stay cool. I heard there may be a break in the Minnesota Shutdown- I do hope so for our MN friends. Now if only they could get the fed straight... Back to the daily grind- my niece is calling out medical vocabulary to me while I do housework- you should hear her pronunciations of some of this!
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sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Jul 15, 2011 8:38:09 GMT -5
Gin- Thanks for the link to the tire site and your help. I will check that out. Shanen- Hugs to you, what a stressful time. Possibly dumb question- is it possible for your to hire your DC to help be a caregiver for MIL? Or does it need to be someone certified? I just remembered that DC was looking for work and don't know if that would be a possible fit or not. mizbear- Family you are stuck with but Friends are people you "CHOOSE" to have in your lives. If this person doesn't bring anything good or supportive to the table then cut her out of our life. Life is way to short to surround yourself with negative people. Relay for Life is tonight so it has been hectic getting things done for that. Fielding lots of phone calls from my mom and other team members asking questions. Unfortunately it's currently raining out right now But when it's not raining it's supposed to be in the 90's. All of the Relays in our area so far this summer have been rained out. That means they either cancel it last minute or scramble for an alternate location. My mom is going to be so upset if that happens. Fingers crossed for sunshine!
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mizbear
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Post by mizbear on Jul 15, 2011 8:49:23 GMT -5
sheila- All paws crossed for sunshine!!
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muttleynfelix
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Post by muttleynfelix on Jul 15, 2011 8:55:00 GMT -5
shanen - Hugs.
Well last night's dinner was a disaster. DH was stressed out by the time I got home (although he and DS had a great time at the zoo yesterday morning and saw the 2 day old giraffe!). His mom and aunt were all in "advice mode". DS was grumpy after his nap. So, I get home and DH's aunt and I and DS go in the house and DH goes DS is hungry how long will supper be. I say a half hour. DH says DS can wait that long. Then DH goes back outside. So I get things started and sit down to talk to DH's aunt and anyway, it wasn't a half hour. It was more like an hour. DS was getting grumpy. I give him a few goldfish, but he is starting to meltdown. Right when we sit down to eat he is totally melting down. SO DH says, ok you are going to bed. So, then I am feeling terrible because I feel like it is my fault that DS doesn't get supper. I know it isn't going to hurt him to go to bed without supper for one night and I felt it was more important to be consistant with DH. Then, DH is doing bedtime and I'm like "will you please let me. Go visit with your family, I haven't seen DS all day". So, what does DH do? He goes and hides out in our bed room for a while. Oh yeah and BIL was late for supper. It all worked out and DS was no worse for wear. We talked about it afterwards and agreed that DS gets fed at supper time no matter what now unless supper is almost done, not if we are just starting. Anyway, that is over. I hope DH's cousin's wedding isn't like that. We got to the end of the evening and DH and BIL were talking after their aunt left and they were like she is just like our sister which is exactly what i was thinking. So, the wedding in Oct will have DH's aunt, his sister, his mom, and his cousins! The woman in his family are stubborn and opinionated..... so am I, but I'm a little nicer in my presentation.
This was on top of the fact that work is making me want to pull my hair out. I didn't have all the information I needed from the surveyors on the project from HELL. This subdivision was half completed in 2005 and designed by one of the areas worst engineers and now the new owner (bought in foreclosure) is trying to finish it up and I'm having to do as-built drawings for something I didn't design and I don't have all the information. THen I find out one sewer line was probably laid perfectly flat. On top of the lift station issues earlier in the week. I have a meeting at 10 today. It was suppose to be a conference call. But the other consultants only have 3 way conference calling, so I have to go over to the office of the lead consultant and hear the conference call there. Plus, I was suppose to have a couple projects finished up but no one has gotten me the right information. I'm a little peaved. I don't think my boss will be happy when he gets back on Monday at my progress on anything.
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shanendoah
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Post by shanendoah on Jul 15, 2011 9:44:24 GMT -5
Well, at least yesterday was a gas only day, like it was supposed to be.
MIL: Thank you all for your offers of help. Here's a little more information. MIL lives in an age and income restricted building- meaning only seniors with little to moderate incomes can live there. It is specifically an "active adult" community. So while people with disabilities can live there, they need to be people who can help themselves or have caretakers come in for the things they can't do (like helping MIL in and out of the bath). Because of the nature of the building (and their special legal/tax status) they can, in fact, kick MIL out if they determine that she can not care for herself. When she falls, instead of reaching for her cell phone, which is in her walker and within her reach to call us or even call 911 herself, she lies there and screams "help" until another resident contacts building management. Building management specifically can NOT help her up themselves. So they call 911. Even if she called 911 herself, building management would know they'd been there because these are keycard restricted buildings. Emergency services has an override, but management would always know it had been used.
For who asked if DC could be the one to go help- we don't necessarily need someone "skilled", but we do need someone with experience moving people. MIL refuses to help you help her up, if she can. (DH will inform her she has to at least try or he'll leave her there, and that gets her to do something, but she doesn't want to.) DC does not have the training to do that, nor the body strength to just power through it. More importantly, I don't think she has the temperment. And when it comes to home health care, having the temperment to do it is the most important. To be honest, we could tell MIL she can only take showers in the evening and come over ourselves. That may be what we do depending on how soon we can get the surgery scheduled. But the truth is- I don't want to. DH doesn't want to. MIL is an unpleasant person by nature, but with strangers and professionals, she at least tries. She doesn't try with us and instead will behave like a spoiled 12 year old. Pre-op appt for the surgery is today. DH will be there. Not certain if we'll be able to schedule the surgery today or have to wait until Monday (appt is with MIL's PCP for EKG, etc to make sure she can handle the surgery) after the PCP has had a chance to contact the specialist. We all know she's not a great candidate for surgery, but she can't afford assisted living, and she doesn't need the kind of care insurance covers. And she will not live with us again.
We do have an aquaintance who is a mortgage broker. We're going to try and get a meeting with him so we can get someone who will tell us what all of our options are for buying a rental property but who we can be fairly certain won't screw us over (part of the same extended group of friends). The ideal would be to buy a little one or two bedroom house for MIL (condos have associations and neighbors who share walls, which we'd like to avoid), that she would rent from us for about what she's paying in rent now. At current prices, with 15% down, that rent would more than cover mortgage and escrow. Getting the down is a little trickier. We'd have to raid our savings and probably take out loans for DH's last year of school, and still take a couple grand from MIL, but its doable. MIL currently has over $10k in her savings, which should cover surgery after insurance and still easily manage that. Currently, her entire SSD check goes straight to that account which we never use, so she actually has an extra $700/month in her budget that she doesn't know about. (And I'd like to keep it that way. After knee surgery, it would be nice to be able to save up to get her a full set of dentures so that she can talk and eat like a normal person again.)
I talked to DH about putting out the word to see if our extended group knows someone who would be willing to come out 3-4 times a week for $100/week, but he'd rather go with an agency. (I have a list of private care givers and what they charge hourly, the $100/week for 3-4 hours a week is at the high end of pay, so we wouldn't be cheating anyone. But most of the private caregivers want guaranteed hours that come out to more than the 4 hours a week that we actually need.) Anyway, today I'll call a couple of the home care agencies, starting with the one that's run by the organization where she gets her primary care, and see what we can do.
mizbear: So glad the niece is alright. Definitely scary.
muttley: I seem to remember some of my friends with little ones coming to similar decisions- toddler eats at the same time every night, regardless of what adults are doing.
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mizbear
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Post by mizbear on Jul 15, 2011 10:06:56 GMT -5
muttley- That is a sticking point I have always gone toe to toe with other family members and their SOs about- I will not send a child to bed without dinner unless the child refuses to eat. Even then if said kid gets up later and decides they are hungry- I make sure they have something in the tummy. It irks me.
shan- YIKES- sending thoughts and prayers your way.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 15, 2011 10:33:46 GMT -5
Shan, where do you live?
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shanendoah
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Post by shanendoah on Jul 15, 2011 10:50:31 GMT -5
gin- greater Seattle area. If it comes down to legal issues, I know multiple lawyers, so getting legal advice and help (which we'd pay for) isn't the issue. This is the property I'm most interested in: www.johnlscott.com/propertydetail.aspx?GroupID=252596235&ListingID=301010925The mainfloor is redone very nicely and the MIL wouldn't ever go up the stairs, so we could take our time fixing that up. It also has a converted garage that would let us store all of her stuff (of course, in the house, she'd have room for that stuff like she doesn't in the apartment). With $13k down, even on a 15yr mortgage, her current rent of $900/month would easily cover mortgage payment and escrow.
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muttleynfelix
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Post by muttleynfelix on Jul 15, 2011 11:23:07 GMT -5
mizbear- At that point he was more tired than hungry and DH's aunt had been shoveling goldfish in his face all afternoon, plus he didn't get lunch until after his nap. He also didn't fuss about going to bed. I think he needed a break from the day. Even if he was a little bit hungry. shan - Lots of hugs. I feel for you. We are going through a not as serious situation, but a situation with my MIL as well. My MIL is currently out of her diabetic medication and cannot get in to see a doctor until next month! Fortunately, DH has 2 brothers in town and the 3 of them, plus MIL's sister who is visiting are taking care of being the bad guys. But the whole situation could be pretty bad because she is getting dizzy spells. Good news, my brother just called and he and his wife agreed to be named as DS's guardian in our will. Woohoo. All of our siblings would do a great job, if not unconventional by some of them, but my brother and his wife have a very similar philosophy when it comes to parenting, education, and religion. So, they are our first choice.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 15, 2011 11:59:10 GMT -5
nice place. Are your DH's available loans subsidized or unsubsidized?
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startsmart
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Post by startsmart on Jul 15, 2011 12:02:02 GMT -5
Yesterday was a CSD - I got dinner out but used my allowance cash. Otherwise stayed at home in my office, beating my head against the desk.
Honey- thanks, I love your suggestions and scripts. Since my work is just that screwed up I'll give a little more detail on what the problem actually seems to be for me.
1. we have no project managers and 3 huge programs. my client doesn't believe we need them because 'we can handle it' which means 'startsmart can manage it' so it falls to me to coordinate calls, make sure the team is doing their part, answering all customer service for those programs, fulfilling orders, etc.
2. we have no operations manager and the one we had who was awesome left because the client won't listen. Our client thinks she will manage each project by checking in with the project manager. Problem, see #1.
3. The most outspoken team member who sends emails telling us we MUST MUST MUST do this NOW is also her boyfriend now. And it gets way inappropriate: talking about decisions made in the bathtub together. forgetting to turn off the video stream after a call and proceeding to make out. And worse.
4. The tendency is 'startsmart will handle it' when something comes up or someone leaves and there's a gap to be filled. When I protest, loudly, and say repeatedly there's no way I can get everything done the response is some variation of 'prioritize your time hourly' which is BS because while everything is not equally important, everything is important. Also the client refuses to give me the support I need to get it all done.
5. I still don't get paid what I'm worth, even with a 20% raise in January. Seriously. And while I increased my income by $30,000 in the last year it's still falling short. That's not me being greedy either. Another client is offering $75/hour for the work I do. At those rates I can work 10-15 hours a week and make more than I earn now at 50-60 hours a week.
My Solutions I know my client is crazy pants. I accept that she's not going to change her stripes and whining about it or fighting it is only making me annoyed and bitter. Yesterday was particularly bad, yes because she overloads me and then complains or hassles me about things not getting done.
So, I'm leaving, transitioning out over the next month once I've secured another client or two who can fill the income gap. I can't continue to live or work this way, even with the money which is better than any job I hated before.
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