Related to KIDS: Planning, Pregnancy, Parenting...

[Virgil Showlion]

KrisKringleGingleBells
Message #1447 - 05/01/09 07:01 PM

Oh, please don't.  I am just having fun with this. 

 

Ditto for me diggin!  I'm just still trying to figure out how I got to 32.  I swear just last month I was only 24 ...

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Wisconsin Beth
Message #1448 - 05/01/09 07:11 PM

Oh, please don't.  I am just having fun with this. 

So am I.  And I am not particularly sensitive about my age.  I figure it's better to be getting older than the alternative. 

And I'll date myself some more here since this popped into my brain after Brooke's comment. 

"I need a hero
I'm holding out for a hero 'til the end of the night
He's gotta be strong
And he's gotta be fast
And he's gotta be fresh from the fight
I need a hero
I'm holding out for a hero 'til the morning light
He's gotta be sure
And it's gotta be soon
And he's gotta be larger than life"

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Wisconsin Beth
Message #1449 - 05/01/09 07:23 PM

generic Flintstones are MUCH kinder on my body than those prenatals were

Wow, the doc let you do that?  The prenatals do have some yucky side effects.

Yep.  He admits to prescribing the latest/greatest version on the prenatals just because it's out, but then my formulary changed and I couldn't get those, so we switched to something else.  It was horrible.  So I tried to buy OTC prenatals.  Even more horrible.  So he said Flintstones.  I bought the Target version last time, but I'm prefering the Roundy's version now. 

And to everyone who says consistipation is part of pregnancy, I had NONE in my first pregnancy until I started taking those d@mn prenatals and I've had none so far in this pregnancy, I'm at 14 weeks now. 

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boos_mom
Message #1450 - 05/01/09 07:23 PM



I know my second pregnancy was harder because I was more tired and wasn't able to take it easier and rest, like I did with the first.  Already having another kid out that you have to tend to and take care of while incubating the next one really was the major factor for me.  The second pregnancy symptom-wise was easier than the first, but it had its own unique symptoms (a lot of back aches since baby was almost all tummy).  I don't know what I would've done if I had the same symptoms as my first.  The time seemed to go so slowly when I was pregnant both times, and since I don't really enjoy being pregnant....  I do like feeling the baby move and actually had an excuse to talk aloud to myself and not be embarassed, rather than just being the weirdo muttering to herself, but the cons were more numerous than the pros. 

I remember the pain of labor, but you kind of give less weight to it as time passes because you have the gift of your baby/child to remind you that labor was only temporary.  But, between pregnancy, labor, and the exhaustion I feel raising two kids, I know that I am happy to have only 2 kids.  Folks ask if we're going to have more.  I say two is just right.  And it does seem to go into "crazyland" territory after the second one arrives.  Definitely feels like more than just double the work.  Having only one child was pretty nice, but I wanted a sibling for #1.  Seeing the two of them play and laugh together just melts my heart, but boy is it exhausting!

Oh, and your body will never be the same again after you have kids, unless you're a super celebrity with time to exercise and do some tummy tightening bands, or maybe very young to begin with.  I've still got my little baby pooch tummy, nearly 10 months later, even though I'm back to pre-prego weight.  And the boobs aren't as perky as they used to be (not that they were fabulous to begin with but it's definitely in a less satisfactory condition after BF-ing is done).  Don't know if it's the pumping or just BF-ing in general that did it for me.  Oh well....

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Holly Smith
Message #1451 - 05/01/09 07:26 PM

I never had a problem with constipation either, but then I have no gallbladder and I think that's the difference.

I used the NatureMade prenatal vitamins you can buy at Costco.  In fact, I'm still on them as E is still getting a lot of her nutrition from breastmilk.  I figure I might as well just stay on them because I'm planning to TTC starting next February and they want you to be on them for 3-6 months prior to TTC.

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digginouttadebt
Message #1452 - 05/01/09 08:13 PM

Prenatals- I took starting taking OTC prenatals as soon as I went off the Pill and didn't have any issues.  Doc wouldn't let me stay on them because he said they didn't have enough folic acid.  The first kind he prescribed were fabulous, no issues with the nasty burps or constipation.  Then the company quit making them.  I had to switch and we are back to the side effects I had with DD.

[Virgil Showlion]

Brooke_in_CO
Message #1454 - 05/01/09 08:26 PM

I need a hero

Isn't that from Footloose?  Now it's stuck in my head...great.  I used to listen to the record (now that's old).  I grew up with a stereo that played 8 tracks!

 

Prenatals...I get cheap generic ones and DHA pills from Walmart (since my prenatals didn't have the lovely fish oils).  The dr just said to check the labels to make sure I'm getting what they recommend.  I also got about 6 weeks worth of 5 random samples from the doctor and used all they gave me.  None of them seemed to work better or worse for me as far as effects...I just have trouble swallowing those horse pills.  I went back to the cheaper (& smaller) walmart stuff rather than monkey with a prescription.  I guess this is one more thing I need to be thankful for...no pill aversions.

I noticed absolutely NO difference between the ones with stool softeners vs the ones without.  My success (or lack thereof) is a direct reflection of what I'm eating.  Go fruits, grains, and veggies!!  I won't admit to the other stuff in my diet... 

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Wisconsin Beth
Message #1455 - 05/01/09 08:29 PM

Doc wouldn't let me stay on them because he said they didn't have enough folic acid.

Mine said that after the first trimester, the folic acid doesn't matter, the baby's gotten all they're going to get. 

I heard/read somewhere that we need to watch out for the fish oil DHA pills - to make sure they're not made from the fish that we're not supposed to eat because of mercury, etc. 

Yeah, it's going though my head now too.  Bonnie Tyler sings it and it's off of Footloose. 

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Brooke_in_CO
Message #1456 - 05/01/09 08:49 PM

I heard/read somewhere that we need to watch out for the fish oil DHA pills - to make sure they're not made from the fish that we're not supposed to eat because of mercury, etc.

Interesting!  I hadn't heard that, but the ones I bought say what fish they came from.  All my prescription samples came with 2 pills...one DHA, one vitamin/mineral.  None of them said where the DHA came from, and I thought that omitted info was a little odd once I started reading labels on ones at the stores. 

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anne81
Message #1457 - 05/01/09 09:41 PM

Trader Joe's makes an awesome folic acid/b6 tab that melts on your tongue.  I used these in combo with the flinstones.  They are great if you have morning sickness so you don't have to worry about throwing it up.

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Amazon Hunter
Message #1458 - 05/01/09 10:27 PM

Has anyone noticed a difference between taking prenatals before pregnancy and taking them during?  I have no problems taking the prenatals now and they don't bother my stomach at all, but I'm wondering if that might change. What do you ladies think?  We are going to "pull the goalie" in July so I'm prepping now.  Of course, I'm off BC pills but I don't know that "I'm back on track" yet.  I haven't really had any changes in my body to suggest that I'm ovulating yet, but this is just my first cycle.  I guess I'll know in a week or so.

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Brooke_in_CO
Message #1459 - 05/01/09 10:57 PM

Has anyone noticed a difference between taking prenatals before pregnancy and taking them during?

No difference for me whatsoever.  But again, I have been breezing through the whole thing w/o any of the major nasty symptoms.

[Virgil Showlion]

sbcaligirl
Message #1460 - 05/01/09 11:28 PM

Has anyone noticed a difference between taking prenatals before pregnancy and taking them during?

I took OTC prenatals for about 8 months before we conceived and had zero problems with them.  After I got pregnant, they did make me a tad nauseous so I started taking them at night before I went to bed and it solved the problem.  I did have to stop taking them for the last month of the pregnancy because my heartburn/nausea were so bad and they made them worse.  The midwives I saw said by that point the benefits of the prenatals were not outweighing the problems they were aggravating since the baby was basically fully developed at that point.  They also said I was probably struggling a bit more with stomach issues because I carried very, very high through my whole pregnancy right until the week I delivered so my stomach was smushed.

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anne81
Message #1461 - 05/02/09 01:13 AM

I noticed a difference in prenatals before and after I got pregnant but I also had severe morning sickness.  Like sbcaligirl I also had intense heartburn and carried pretty high.  During my last weeks of pregnancy I was measuring so small (despite gaining 45 lbs!) they sent me in for an ultrasound to make sure I didn't have IUGR.

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Who_is_JohnGalt1
Message #1462 - 05/02/09 02:58 AM

I just wanted to post this in case someone is TTC or just found out that they are pregnant.  I am in general a very lazy, not very disciplined person, so I didn't start taking prenatals until my 2nd or 3rd month or so and even then not every day.   And the kiddo seems just fine.   I don't think they have prenatals 30 yrs ago and look at us now.  The point I am trying to make is that don't stress yourself out if you are not able to take them due to morning sickness or whatever.  As long as you are generally healthy and use common sense during pregnancy, you can't screw up too badly.
I remember a few years ago reading a post from a lady who was pregnant and was asking for suggestions on what to bring to lunch bc the list of foods the didn't want to eat while pregnant was 5 miles long.  I can never understand why people go so overboard with things. 
Enjoy this time as much as you can and try not to have any preconceived notions about any of this.  You might be in for a world of surprises.
Lena

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EconStudent07
Message #1463 - 05/02/09 03:20 AM

I don't think they have prenatals 30 yrs ago and look at us now. 

I'm not trying to criticize you, but I just wanted to point something out about this--30 years ago, or whenever it was before prenatal vitamins came along, we were much more likely to be eating actual food rather than the processed, nutrient-stripped junk that now passes as food. Now, taking prenatals doesn't excuse anyone from eating well, but diets 30 years ago or so were much more whole simply because real food was all that existed.

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Who_is_JohnGalt1
Message #1464 - 05/02/09 03:34 AM

Econ,
I agree 100%.   I don't eat processed food, so I guess I just take that for granted.  But you right, our life style has changed, out nutrition has changed.  I was just trying to tell people not to get too worried if they are not able to take prenatal vitamins.  Some doctors have a tendency to make it seem that if you don't take them, you are harming the baby or something and I just think that's overkill.
Lena

[Virgil Showlion]

EconStudent07
Message #1465 - 05/02/09 03:54 AM

 I was just trying to tell people not to get too worried if they are not able to take prenatal vitamins.  Some doctors have a tendency to make it seem that if you don't take them, you are harming the baby or something and I just think that's overkill.

Oh, you are right! If someone can't take them, she should just pay a little extra attention to her diet. Nutrition from food sources is better absorbed anyway!

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eastside-resident78
Message #1466 - 05/02/09 01:16 PM



Hello Ladies,

I have been feeling there's something different with my body for almost a week and a half. My husband asked me to take the pregnancy tests and I did it 2 morning ago and it came back positive!! To make sure, I did another one using a different brand pregnancy test and it came back as positive again!! My "scheduled" period is not until this coming Tuesday. And I used pregnancy tests that supposedly tell you if you are pregnant earlier. My first day of last period is April 7.

My husband and I have been trying for over 8 months now so we are happy and nervous and excited ... all of that and more!!

I have been taking prenatal vitamins since a year ago. We have even almost done setting up the baby room months ago!

I am  going to call the doctor on Monday to schedule an appointment.

Will you Ladies give me some advice/words/anything regarding my new pregnancy?

I just turned 31 years old and this is going to be my first baby

Thank you.

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anne81
Message #1467 - 05/02/09 05:28 PM

congrats eastside-resident78!

My advice at this stage is to get plenty of rest.  I remember wanting tons of naps in the first trimester.

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livingalmostlarge
Message #1468 - 05/04/09 12:53 AM

Congratulations eastside resident!

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Who_is_JohnGalt1
Message #1469 - 05/04/09 01:24 AM

Congratulations!!!
I told  my DH after we had our boy that if anyone ever asked me advice on pregnancy/childbirth thing, I will tell them one thing and one thing only: throw away all of your preconceived notions.   Don't say things like "I'll never do this" or "I'll always do that".   Go with the flow.  Use common sense to have a healthy pregnancy and a healthy  baby, but don't stress out too much bc 1) those little ones have the mind of their own from before they are even born and 2) your body has the mind of it's own as well.
Enjoy this time with your husband bc no matter how you will want to try to keep things the same, they will change.
Good luck!!
Lena

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KrisKringleGingleBells
Message #1470 - 05/04/09 01:39 PM



boos_mom, my mother had three of us.  She said that adjusting from one child to two was very difficult for her.  She said by the time she had my youngest brother it didn't seem as hard because she was already use to multi-tasking.

 

In regards to the pre-natal vitamins, I've been taking the Women's One A Day prenatals.  I did have some problems with constipation in my first trimester, but it's gotten a lot better in my second trimester.  I just make sure to eat a lot of fiber, and once or twice a week I take a couple of fiber pills.  I think, for me at least, it's important to take a prenatal because I don't always get to eat as healthy as I would like.  I do a pretty good job of eating low-fat, low-sugar, all natural stuff, but there are days when I also end up eating not so great.  I figure at least with the vitamins I'm making sure both me and the baby are getting some extra nutrients.  Plus, my fingernails look nicer than they have in a long time!

[Virgil Showlion]

Wisconsin Beth
Message #1471 - 05/04/09 01:50 PM

Congratulations Eastside!  My only suggestion - eat healthy and get lots of rest, like Anne said. 

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MittenKitten
Message #1472 - 05/05/09 01:07 AM



Congrats Eastside!  I would go back and read the first pages of this thread there is a ton of great advice.  I had my first baby right before I turned 31.  Advice: 1. take a vacation now with DH if you can, it gets much more difficult after this.  2.  Do NOT read "What to Expect when you're expecting" unless you like the strict you HAVE to do everything right and eat everything that tastes nasty to you.  I loved the books "Baby Bargains" and "A Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy" 3.  Do not buy/register for everything, you need much less then they will tell you.  Many will say don't tell anyone the sex if you find out so you don't get a ton of baby clothes and get useful things instead.  You can find plenty of cheap baby clothes on clearance, the thrift stores or garage sales.  Or even Freecycle. 

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Brooke_in_CO
Message #1473 - 05/05/09 03:40 PM



Eastside -

Congrats as well!  I am expecting our first at age 31 in August.  I second everything that Mitten said about reading the thread, books, and where to get stuff on the cheap.  I browse the web for pregnancy articles, but only from medical sites.  My insurance also gave me a pregnancy book published by the mayo clinic that has been wonderful. 

I did tell everyone the sex because I had a bunch of coworkers who had girl hand me downs ready to go (and I'm having a girl) so that way I scored a ton of stuff.  If I hadn't told, they would have given it away to someone else or sold it before I deliver, so it made sense.  But I understand the reasoning behind Mitten's comment.

Take NOTES as you read and keep things together!  I have been jotting down all sorts of thoughts/recommendations/experiences so that I can be better informed/open-minded.  I also have a daily log and write down things about my pregnancy.  It has been very insightful so far...how much I exercise (the guilt factor is HUGE), the first time I felt the baby move, first time daddy felt the baby move, any symptoms or discomfort I had...significant dr appts/test results, anything.  At first it seemed silly but now I look back and am glad I have my unofficial record of things.  I doubt I will be motivated to do a baby book after birth, but at least I have a record of when she was growing!

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boos_mom
Message #1474 - 05/06/09 07:20 PM



Congrats eastside!  I do agree with others about getting lots of rest and enjoy the time with DH now.  Also, although planning is nice, do realize that you are no longer "in control" of things (except of course your own lifestyle - eating, drinking, etc.).  Your body will change and the hormones will be messing with you and baby will do what baby will do.  Be flexible and be open to various options/solutions as each pregnancy is different.  Also, I was careful about whom I told in the first trimester, just because I was worried about a possible miscarriage (I am a worrier).  But other folks aren't such worriers.

brooke - wow, a daily log!  I think if I kept a daily log, I would've scared myself out of doing it again.  It was not an easy first pregnancy.  Some things are better to be softened by time.  Glad you have such a great keepsake though!

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bogart
Message #1475 - 05/07/09 03:19 AM

Most doctors say there is no real reason to worry about fertility issues until you've tried for at least a year to get pregnant.

I'm late to this part of the discussion, but the current thinking is that if you are 35+ it's better to be seen sooner -- after 6 months of no success.  The reason is that infertility treatments work less well the older you get, so you don't want to leave finding out there really is a problem too late if you are "older" .  Just in case anyone needs to know.

Eastside -- congrats!  Enjoy it.  Beyond taking general good care of yourself and taking folic acid, there's really not much it's essential to do!

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Meg - Mommy to Averie
Message #1476 - 05/07/09 03:53 AM

Congrats, Eastside.

As far as the pre-natals go, I've been taking the Dr. Greene ones by TwinLab.  I first found them at Wal-Mart but I can't find them anymore there so I just bought some more online.  I also took an extra folic acid supplement.  I'm still taking it even though I'm in the 2nd trimester now.  I'll ask doc about stopping the extra, although I don't think it could be bad.  The Dr. Greene vitamins are kind of expensive (cheapest I found was $12 and change online) compared to the other ones out there but I really like them.  They're smooth capsules as opposed to the giant horse pill tablets so they go down easier.  I have a hard time swallowing any pill bigger than a fingernail so these work perfect for me.  I haven't had any problems with constipation, in fact, I seem to be more regular than ever before .

[Virgil Showlion]

Brooke_in_CO
Message #1477 - 05/08/09 10:13 PM

wow, a daily log!  I think if I kept a daily log, I would've scared myself out of doing it again.

LOL!  I have a line for every day...that doesn't mean anything gets written in it!!  If it's an uneventful day (no new changes, no bad symptoms, no appts, no exercise) it stays blank.  So there are a lot of blank ones!  Hence the guilting into exercising more.  It is my motivational record and big events keeper.  I thought it might have value down the line.  Though I confess...after doing the 5k last weekend there have been a lot of blanks...shouldn't that count as a couple days of exercise?? 

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boos_mom
Message #1478 - 05/10/09 03:54 AM

Hope all of the mommies and mommies-to-be have a wonderful Mother's Day with your families!

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abundanceandprosperity
Message #1479 - 05/13/09 07:19 PM



So I have a question for all of you mothers.  I recently miscarried at 9 weeks (the second time in a year with two years of trying to have a child).  I am finally at the point where I don't cry everyday about it, am back at work and resuming life. 

The problem is my five closest friends have had babies in the last six months.  We are all supposed to get together (along with their babies) this weekend for lunch.  I have only seen one of them since this happened and was fine with her and her baby.  I thought I was up for seeing them all but now I am starting to dread it. 

Also, two of them are starting back to work next week and I am sure they are all going to want to talk about it but feel like they can't because I am there.  What should I do?  Get it over with and go.  Go but just for a little while so they can talk freely after I leave.  Avoid the group get-togethers and just see them one-on -one?  If you were in the position of my friends what would you wish?   

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anne81
Message #1480 - 05/13/09 07:26 PM

I'm so sorry for your loss

If I were your friend I'd want you to do whatever makes you comfortable and happy.  I would not be offended if you felt unable to see so many babies in one place.  I also wouldn't wish you would leave so I could chat!

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boos_mom
Message #1481 - 05/13/09 08:29 PM



abundance - I am sorry for your loss.  I am sure that your friends would understand.  Like anne says, do what makes you feel most comfortable.  Since they are your closest friends, I am sure they are all very concerned and want to help you through this difficult time.  One of my best friends miscarried not too long ago and I wanted to support her in any way possible.   

I hope you will go to see a specialist to assist in determining any possible causes for your miscarriages and prevent any future ones. 

 

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abundanceandprosperity
Message #1482 - 05/13/09 08:53 PM



Thanks Anne, my friends likely will feel the same way.  I am thinking of going but leaving somewhat early (when I feel the need to).

 

Boosmom, thanks.  I have had some preliminary tests done with no causation.  With two miscarriages it is still in the realm of chance occurrence.  I go in again tomorrow to meet with my RE and my dr for a follow up from the surgery. 

[Virgil Showlion]

Brooke_in_CO
Message #1483 - 05/13/09 09:25 PM



Abundance -

Are you my college roommate?  Your situation mirrors hers perfectly.  She has had lots of friends having babies over the course of her trials (miscarriages at 16 wks & 9 wks also over the past 2 years).  When I found out I was pregnant, I dreaded telling her and causing her pain, but we talked and now have a comfortable level of conversation/interaction because I know where she stands.  I was so conflicted that my happy news would be nothing but misery for her.  I'm sure your friends feel the same way, and maybe by talking to them beforehand it will alleviate both your fears?  Maybe you'll decide you can handle the outing, maybe not.  Your friends will understand either way (or they darn well SHOULD)!!

I sincerely hope that the 3rd time is the charm for both you and my dear friend.

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sbcaligirl
Message #1485 - 05/16/09 10:14 PM

Well, we've survived the first 5 weeks and DD is doing really well.  She's grown a little over two inches and has gained a little over 3.5 lbs.  Which brings me to my question....how do you know if they're gaining too much weight?  We're obviously not worried about her not thriving with these stats, but I want to make sure we aren't seriously over-feeding to the point where she's gaining too much too fast.  We don't have an appt with her doctor for a few more weeks so I thought I'd see what pearls of wisdom all you experienced moms have.  She seems to be hungry all the time!  She eats tons (or what seems like it to me).  She does occasionally have major spit-ups but those seem more tied to when she drinks the bottle too fast rather than being over-full
By my calculations she's now at 90th% for both height and weight for her age....she's 23 inches and about 10ish lbs.  At birth she was 21 inches and 7 lbs 4 ounces when we left hospital.

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kristi28
Message #1486 - 05/17/09 08:26 PM

sbcaligirl: Don't worry too much, it sounds like your little one is just going thru a growth spurt.  My dear friend's daughter was in the 99th for weight and 95th for height for a long time.  A really big girl as a baby, but perfectly healthy.  She is now a tall skinny three year old.  Usually they aren't concerned at all if your baby is both tall and heavy (baby is about the right amount chubby, just bigger than average).  You might be over-feeding if the little one is in the 90th percentile for weight, but only the 25th for height (baby is much chubbier than they should be).  If you are worried, call your doctor; they should be able to reassure you.  And congrats on making it through those first weeks - someday you will get more sleep (just don't ask me when  )

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livingalmostlarge
Message #1487 - 05/18/09 12:37 AM

I'm sorry to hear about your loss abundance.  I hope that you are feeling better.

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goddessofrock
Message #1488 - 05/18/09 01:51 PM



Abundance~~ Sorry for your loss.

 

one of my cousins had a miscarriage at 13 weeks... right AFTER she told everyone. Because her SIL just had a baby and the other SIL is having one next month, my cousin is not as social with the fam lately.

 

The pregnancy was not planned but once they found out they were really happy so she was pretty devastated... we all understand that she might not want to be around pregnant women or new moms for awhile, and your friends will too.  Your friends are probably trying to figure out how to include you without making you uncomfortable or upset. They will probably be glad to have you there even just for a little while.

 

 

[Virgil Showlion]

anne81
Message #1489 - 05/18/09 05:13 PM

sbcaligirl - is your DD taking breastmilk?  DS is a chunk - he's actually at the 100th percentile for weight after being at 99% for awhile.  He's 4.5 months.  My pediatrician isn't worried about it at all.  What she said is that babies can't overeat because they spit up or vomit the extra if they get it.  She said that breastfed babies tend to start out heavier and then thin out after 6 months when they are more mobile.  She also said that there is a new theory floating around some pediatricians that heavier babies will actually have faster metabolisms as adults.  The thinking goes that babies metabolisms are set when they are young - so if their bodies feel they are living in a time of plenty they will shed calories pretty quickly but if their bodies feel they were born in a time of famine or scarcity (being super skinny or not eating a lot) they will hang on to more calories as an adult.

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Wisconsin Beth
Message #1490 - 05/18/09 05:59 PM

abundance, I'm so sorry for your loss.  You're in my thoughts and prayers. 

sbcaligirl, I'd add it to my list of questions for the next well baby visit, but would try not to worry about it.  DD was a chunk and is now thinning down since she's walking.  And people keep telling me that we want some chubbiness for baby's first illness. 

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sbcaligirl
Message #1491 - 05/18/09 06:14 PM

Thanks all for the encouragement.  She's on formula and does pretty well with it.  She does spit up rather copious amounts sometimes - typically when I think she has overeaten so that's good to hear that other babies do that to at times.  I'm definitely adding this to the list of questions for our next visit in early June and if it seems like her weight is exploding before then, I'll call the doc.

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Wisconsin Beth
Message #1492 - 05/18/09 08:51 PM

Yeah, DD's been pigging out on formula lately.  We're in the transition to whole milk right now and it's interesting how much formula she's taking at night and how much finger foods she's eating (or not somedays.)  Do we ever stop worrying about our LOs food intake?   

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abundanceandprosperity
Message #1493 - 05/19/09 04:28 PM



Thank you everyone for the kind words and encouragement.  It has been hard but gets better as time passes.  Luckily the doctors' appointments went very well, everything checked out ok.  They really think it was just bad luck to have two. I am healthy and young so they have no big concerns.

The lunch went very well.  Everyone acknowledged the elephant in the room and gave me a hug.  Then we went on with our day together and had fun.  I have to say that I love my friends and their sweet babies, they didn't cause me this pain so spending time with them made me feel loved, not hurt.  That said, your kind comments made it much easier to work through my fears beforehand so I wasn't caught by surprise with major emotions.

Thanks.

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livingalmostlarge
Message #1494 - 05/19/09 11:47 PM

Abundance glad to hear that it went well at the meeting and with the doctor's appointment.  Glad that things went so well.

[Virgil Showlion]

Meg - Mommy to Averie
Message #1495 - 05/26/09 12:26 AM

Hi ladies! It's been awhile - I mainly follow the Health and Fitness Pregnancy Board and often forget about this thread. 

I had an appointment last Friday and gained back the 2 pounds I had lost in between my first and second visits.  I was a bit overweight to start with though and the doc hasn't mentioned anything about the weight gain (or lack thereof - since at this point, I have not gained or lost any) so I guess I'm okay?  Horrible thing though - they did an ultrasound and the doc points out that the cord is up by the baby's neck.  Now I'm consumed with worry and fear that something will happen to the baby and of course, nothing can be done about it and if something did happen, we wouldn't even know until the next appointment mid-June.  I read some on the Internet about cords being wrapped around the neck in 30% of births and the babies are fine but I just CAN'T stop thinking about it.  DH and I didn't try that long but we have been married for almost 5 years and are SO ready for our first little one.  I feel guilty about thinking that we've already bought all the furniture and how could our baby be taken from us when we're obviously ready. 

*Sigh*  It just consumes my every thought and I lay awake at night thinking about it.  I'm not at the point where I can be counting kicks and stuff like that (we're not feeling consistent movement yet though all the ultrasounds show him/her kicking away).  I just don't know what I'd do if it happened.  Just needed to get that out.  DH keeps telling me everything will be fine but I'm the worrier between us.

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hunh
Message #1496 - 05/26/09 04:13 AM

Megera716 I'm so sorry about your stress.  I conceived after years of trying and bought a doppler on ebay (I paid about $100, shipped) that let me listen to the baby's heartbeat every single day (and I did).  It made me feel much less stressed about something happening (though not everyone feels that way about using a doppler at home), so if it would have the same effect for you it might be worth getting one (I didn't really involve my DH though he knew I was doing it ... he thought I was nuts, but I didn' care). 

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anne81
Message #1497 - 05/26/09 04:25 AM

Abundance - I'm glad your visit went well!

Megera - I'm sorry you're so worried.  I hope that you're able to ease your mind soon.

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livingalmostlarge
Message #1498 - 05/26/09 01:16 PM

Megera, sorry to hear, hope things work out.

I was wondering how long were women in labor for and was it painful?

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goddessofrock
Message #1499 - 05/26/09 01:51 PM



Oh Megera! try to stay calm. You are at a point where you will start to notice the baby moving at times though. Have you felt something that feels a bit like a cell phone vibrating yet? or some people say it feels like popcorn popping...

 

I'm about 20 pounds overweight but at the beginning of my second trimester I started feeling the baby move right after I got home for the day and put my feet up... at first I felt it every couple of days and then it got pretty regular. Every day at 6pm. I never got a dopler, but if it makes you feel better you might want to look into that.

 

Living almost Large~~ I was in labor for 23 hours... woke up at 2am... water broke in the toilet. (if you're not sure if you peed yourself, you peed yourself. your water does not smell or feel like pee. it feels like a period gush but it's clear.) got up every 15 minutes for bathroom and contractions... that just felt weird... slept a few hours... called my mom and the doctor... contractions were irregular ~every 7-20 minutes and not lasting long (you go to the hospital at 5 minutes apart, 1 minute long, and they have been coming regularly for an hour.... anyways around 10 hours in the contractions started getting uncomfortable and then I started throwing up! Called the doc again and they said it was time to go to the hospital... 12 hours in(at the hospital 2 cm dialated)... slowly progressing... getting more uncomfortable... 15 hours in throwing up again.... progressively PAINFUL... allowed the midwife to give me IV fluids and an epidural... this slowed things down... got numb... took a bit of a nap... 20 hours in it was time to push... didn't feel anything for about an hour... after that I felt like I wasn't getting any painkiller and was yelling "I need more Epidural!" and they were like "you're getting it in the IV!" and I was like "NO!! I'm NOT!!! I need more!!!" (they said if you get dehydrated the contractions are worse.) Threw up a few more times.... pushed for another hour... Hour 22 a doctor came in to check progress (2 hours of pushing with the midwife) he did something which helped me push and 15 minutes later AJ was moving further down... then they told me not to push because the cord was wrapped a bit around his neck.... (GEE! I WONDER WHY IT TOOK ME AWHILE TO PUSH HIM OUT!!) At this point i wanted to DIE... the last half hour felt like it was an ETERNITY  but I pushed him out with minor tearing and he was healthy and staring at the lights in the incubator as I got stitched up. Once he was out I was like "can I go for a walk?" Totally worth it. (My mom had me at 17 in 5 hours... she said "if it took me 3 hours of pushing to get you out, you would have been an olnly child. LOL)

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sbcaligirl
Message #1500 - 05/26/09 03:52 PM



I had two false alarms of contractions - one lasting about 10 hours and the second lasting about 15 hours.  Between the second false start and actual labor, I had minor contractions off and on for three days before labor started in earnest with really, really tough contractions at 7:30 am.  After about 5 hours of strong, regular contractions we went to the hospital.  I was not handling the contractions well and was also panicking that they were going to send me home again (which certainly didn't help).  The nurse gave me something to take the edge off because I was freaking out so much.  I got an epidural an hour or so later which really, really helped things a ton.  I could still feel the pressure of the contractions but not the pain.  I wasn't progressing all that well throughout the day even though my contractions were very regular and punctuated with pouts of throwing up and nausea which were ever so fun. 

By 8 pm that night the midwife was concerned I wasn't progressing and wanted to try to speed things up.  She broke my water around 9 pm and decided to start pitocin around 10 when that didn't help much.  Around 12 am they told me we may be heading towards a c-section if my contractions didn't start increasing in strength but thankfully, about 1/2 an hour later the pitocin really started working well.  I started pushing a few hours later and ended up pushing for just over 2 hours.  The epidural really wasn't doing much during the pushing because it was really painful with each and every push.  DD had a giant head which is why I had to push for so long and probably partially responsible for the prolonged labor.  She was born 24 hours after labor started at 7:32 am the next morning.  I had very minimal tearing and only required a couple stitches.

People always say you forget the pain once you hold the baby and all you can see is your beautiful baby.  I totally don't agree with that at all - I still remember every single second of the entire experience and how painful it was BUT that doesn't stop me from being totally in love with my lo.  Not everyone handles pain the same, but I knew I would have a hard time dealing since I don't deal well with pain when I'm under stress.  I planned to get an epidural from day one because of this and it was the right decision for me.  My only regret was not being able to sleep virtually at all during labor because of the throwing up and the blood pressure monitoring.  That made the first day with DD pretty tough.

[Virgil Showlion]

Wisconsin Beth
Message #1501 - 05/26/09 04:19 PM

Megera - I'm sorry you're stressing over this.  I guess all I can think of is to have them check the cord placement at every appt, if possible. 

Living - I don't remember my pain, but I had the easy, fast first time birth.    I woke up around 6am with extremely irregular contractions.  Took a long hot shower and came out with contractions about every 5 minutes apart (around 8am.)  Woke up DH, who showered, shaved, etc while I called the doctor's office.  The on call doc. called back and said come on it, we'll see what's going on and give you pain meds if you want.  We got to the hospital around 10:15am and I was 8cm dilated.  I got my epi and around 12:45pm my L&D nurse told me to start pushing.  It took me about 30 minutes to really figure out pushing and then about 1 hour or progressively harder pushing.  DD was born at 2:09pm, less than 4 hours after we got to the hospital and about 6 hours after I started getting definite contractions.

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livingalmostlarge
Message #1502 - 05/26/09 05:04 PM

Goddess sounds painful.  Sbcaligirl, sounds also painful.

Wisconsin beth, your story sounds more like the births I've been hearing about.

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anne81
Message #1503 - 05/26/09 05:10 PM

Living - two weeks before I gave birth I was something like 3 cm dilated and 75% effaced which I thought meant I was going to give birth soon!   Five days before I was at 4cm.  4 cm is often considered active labor.  Two days before I gave birth I started feeling crushing pain in my pubic bone every 5-7 minutes that lasted about a minute.  I went into L&D two or three times and they told me I wasn't in labor (couldn't see contractions much on the monitor and the baby's heart rate stayed the same).  The pain was so bad they gave me morphine and sleeping pills.  Neither helped.  I finally went in 10 hours after my last visit and demanded they induce me (about 10 days before my due date).  The Dr. told me I was past 6 cm and they were keeping me.  They gave me a blessed epidural, broke my water and started pitocin.  After they broke the water it took 7 pain free hours to get all the way dilated and to have the baby at +2 so I could push.  I never felt a contraction anywhere other than my pubic bone.  Weird.  The pitocin made me have continual contractions at one point and I pushed the baby out in about an hour and his heart rate hardly budged.

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digginouttadebt
Message #1504 - 05/26/09 11:33 PM

Who doesn't love birth stories?  Men, I suppose.  Anywho...first labor went quickly.  Water broke around midnight, went to the hospital around 3, started pitocin since I wasn't having regular, hard contractrations and I was only dialated 3cm.  After 4 or so hours of that, contractions were bad, but I was onlly dilated 4- 5cm.  I begged for the epidural because I couldn't take it, doc gave in and told everyone to leave since it would take hours (the epidural is supposed to slow things down)...I asked the nurse to help me turn over because I had some pressure.  She checked before helping me and said, "Uh, that's the baby's head!".  They had to run and get the doctor and about 20-30 min later, DD was here.  So I dialated like 5+ cm in 30 mins or so!  The doc kept saying is was very unusual.  My theory was that I couldn't relax, so my body wouldn't dialate.  I am getting nervous about this time around- I am hoping it goes as quickly as the last one did.  Only 4 weeks to go!

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livingalmostlarge
Message #1505 - 05/27/09 12:36 AM

Are epidurals common?  Do most women get them? I ask because quite a few of my friends had natural births recently but they were labor like 3-4 hours!  Ridiculous sounding.

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boos_mom
Message #1506 - 05/27/09 01:18 AM



abundance - glad your visit with your friends went well.

meg - hope things continue to go well.  Being pregnant is very difficult for worriers (I'm one too).  Hope you are able to find ways to help alleviate your worries. 

LAL - If my labor had been only 3-4 hours long, I would've delivered naturally, since I didn't opt for the epidural (both times) until being on the pitocin for 8 hrs (#1) and 5 hrs (#2).  With #2, I had back labor and it was not at all alleviated by the epidural.  I hadn't slept since the previous night, as contractions started and were like 6 minutes apart since 8pm but I didn't go to the hospital until about 3 am after my water ruptured.  #2 arrived at 11:30 am after 20 minutes of pushing.  With #1, water ruptured at 4:30 am, got to the hospital at 9:30 am, delivered at 8:30 pm. Thankfully, #1 had no back labor, so the epidural was very helpful in allowing me to rest, since the contractions on the pit were almost continuous (only like 5 seconds between strong contractions) by the time I opted for the epidural about 4:30 pm.  Had to push #1 for 1.5 hours and the last push out was the last ounce of strength I had.  Both times I had some tearing along with the episiotomies. 

I think it was pretty painful.  But, the length of the labor was the harder part because it drains your strength.  I had the morphine/IV drugs with #2 while we waited for the anesthesiologist, and that made me feel very dizzy and woozy and didn't do much for the pain.  The epidural was better for me, but of course doesn't work on back labor. 

[Virgil Showlion]

MuttleynFelix
Message #1507 - 05/27/09 02:54 AM



LAL - My sis has 3 kids and the longest labor was 7 hours. There have been a lot of times in my life I didn't want to be just like big sis; on this I totally do.  Her babies have come around 37-38 weeks and fairly quick (of course that means we'll have a christmas baby...hmmmm we were trying to avoid that). I have found that I basically don't care what everyone else has done or did. I am going to have this baby my way from what I eat, to natural/epidural etc.  For some reason, while I like to be informed, I don't want to be over informed on this. We're just having a baby, not rocket science.

For those who don't know my news, yes I got the + sign while on vacation. Totally freaked me out. I actually told DH I have look at the directions!  But truly I felt pregnant from the week we conceived. It was weird. Anyway, I'm 7 weeks along. Still haven't found a doctor and was freaking out about it. But today on my walk, my neighbors at the end of the road were out talking to another neighbor and the gal at the end of the road mentions that her dog has been freaking out ever since they found out they were expecting. So, I ask who is your OB and that just lead to the obvious are you expecting and it was like well yeah. But it was cool and it was nice to find someone else who is pregnant (in real life) right now. 

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sbcaligirl
Message #1508 - 05/27/09 04:18 AM

I have found that I basically don't care what everyone else has done or did. I am going to have this baby my way from what I eat, to natural/epidural etc.  For some reason, while I like to be informed, I don't want to be over informed on this. We're just having a baby, not rocket science.

I think this is a great attitude to have because so many people will try to but in and tell you what to do about everything!  I actually stopped reading a lot of the books (especially What to Expect when you're expecting) because they were freaking me out.  I felt like every single thing I was doing was damaging my baby and every single twinge was a precursor to a miscarriage.  Some books/advice really can be counter-productive if all they serve to do is freak you out.  That said, I did really enjoy the Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy - much more tongue and cheek which is what I found helpful.

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Meg - Mommy to Averie
Message #1509 - 05/27/09 04:19 AM

At first, I really wanted to get a doppler so I could listen to the heartbeat whenever I wanted.  But at our last two appointments, they haven't been able to find the heartbeat with the doppler and I've had an ultrasound.  At the last appointment, the doctor determined it is because the placenta is basically on top of the baby inside there so there's a whole lot of tissue the little thingy has to go through.  I know that if we got a doppler and then that same thing happened and we couldn't hear the heartbeat, I would freak out unnecessarily.

I will definitely talk to them about checking the cord placement at every visit.  My "big" ultrasound to find out the gender is June 19th (I will be 21 weeks then but that's how the every 4 weeks appointment thing worked out for me) so they will be able to check again then.  If it's still by the neck or wrapped around, I will definitely have them monitor it.  I'm trying not to think about it, only because I know there's nothing that can be done about it if it does get wrapped around (as I'm still at least 6 weeks from viability even), but obviously it's hard not to think about.  I wish the doc would have kept his big mouth shut.  Ignorance is bliss and all that.

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anne81
Message #1510 - 05/27/09 06:03 AM

Megera - I had the placenta in front too.  I had a home doppler and it freaked me out that I couldn't find the heartbeat when everyone on my birth board could.  I didn't know about the placenta until my 20 week appointment.  It also took me longer to feel movement - I think I didn't feel it consistently until 23 weeks or so.

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KrisKringleGingleBells
Message #1511 - 05/27/09 01:29 PM



I, too, have a placenta that's on top.  I'm now at 21 weeks, and I can barely feel her kick.  I feel her more at night if I lay in certain positions.  I was starting to worry because I couldn't feel her moving, but at our first ultrasound last week she was like a little kick boxer (Edited: Apparently my innocent comment on the martial arts has been labeled as profanity!) in there with arms and legs flailing all over the place!  That's when we also found out we are having a girl (due Oct. 8).  Everyone in my family is so excited because I was the last girl baby born in our family, and I'm 32.  Everyone is already buying clothes.

 

I'm really on the fence about whether or not I want an epidural.  My mother had all three of us with no epidural (and she was in labor a long time with me, her first).  The thought of someone ramming a needle into my spine actually scares me more than giving birth.  What I'm worried about is having to have an episiotomy or tearing and feeling pain from that, not pain from the actual delivery.

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goddessofrock
Message #1512 - 05/27/09 02:36 PM



Living almost Large~~

 

I didn't want to have an epidural, but that was when I thought I was going to have a 5 hour labor like mom did!!

 

Just plan on having one unless they tell you the baby is coming too fast!

 

Oh and you have to sit up, so don't wait until you are in too much anguish to sit up.

 

My doctors all said that the average labor is 16-24 hours. If your water breaks the doctor usually wants to deliver the baby within 24 hours. If you are pushing for 2 hours they will also evaluate whether you are progressing or they should just do the c-section. (the first 1/3 was weird and uncomfortable but not bad, the second 1/3 was starting to get painful and vomiting, and the last third was the active labor with the painful contractions and the 3 hours of pushing at the very end.) I think that's pretty normal.

 

 

[Virgil Showlion]

Wisconsin Beth
Message #1513 - 05/27/09 03:29 PM

I don't like pain, so I planned on having an epidural with DD.  And I'm planning on having one with this baby too.  My older sister had 1 and it was badly done so she swears against having them.  My younger sister refused them on all 3 of her kids because she knew the doctors - she was a nurse at the time.  It's an individual choice. 

My hospital does a preparing for birth type class and has an anesthesiologist come and talk to the group.  He/she explains the procedure and answers any questions you may have.  

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Former_Roomate_99
Message #1514 - 05/27/09 04:15 PM

The thought of someone ramming a needle into my spine actually scares me more than giving birth.  What I'm worried about is having to have an episiotomy or tearing and feeling pain from that, not pain from the actual delivery.

I was told that the epidural puts the medicine between the spinal cord and the spine, not into the spine.  With mine, they left a tube in there about the size of a human hair that lets small amounts of medicine drip in slowly. 

Even if you go natural, they'll use novacane before doing an episotomy. 

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Holly Smith
Message #1515 - 05/27/09 04:25 PM

My epidural was fantastic, but I had a really good anesthesiologist.  She was in and out in about 20 seconds.  I didn't feel any pain during the latter part of the contractions and my c-section, and I was able to move my feet about two hours after E was born.

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Nikki Mac
Message #1516 - 05/27/09 04:36 PM

The epudural is truly what makes me panic. My DH and are are talking about having kids so I am starting to really think about the whole process. I don't like pain but needles actually make me panic, its not the blood, its the needle.

Many people say natural birth isn't that bad. Does anyone feel the epurdural was really great, or was it just a little helpful?

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Wisconsin Beth
Message #1517 - 05/27/09 06:00 PM

I loved my epi.  And they do it from the back so you don't SEE the needle - I don't like needles either, but once they're in I'm ok.  Now, the nurse/aide/whomever that was trying to put the needle in my wrist for the iv did a HORRIBLE job and hurt more and longer than my epi.  It took her multiple tries and I have big non-rolling veins so I don't think she had much of an excuse for it. 

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Holly Smith
Message #1518 - 05/27/09 06:12 PM

The nurses blew out four of my veins trying to find one for the IV.  They did such a bad job they had to stop and wait for three hours for a different anesthesiologist to come on shift who was really good.  I am a hard stick and I had been throwing up, so no matter how much water I chugged back I was dehydrated.  The anes. found a vein in about 15 seconds.  She's the one who did my epidural.

[Virgil Showlion]

livingalmostlarge
Message #1519 - 05/27/09 06:50 PM

Would it seem weird to say that I'm more terrified of the episotomy.  Is it painful? Sore? 

This is TMI, but a friend said she tore really badly from the birth, her son was born in 10 minutes, and it didn't heal well.  No sex since then.  She's been seeing a female NP for specific stretching to have sex since it's not possible.  Have you heard of this?

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Holly Smith
Message #1520 - 05/27/09 07:26 PM

I have heard of it, but it seems pretty uncommon.  I had a c/s so I have no personal experience with it.

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Wisconsin Beth
Message #1521 - 05/27/09 07:59 PM

Would it seem weird to say that I'm more terrified of the episotomy.  Is it painful? Sore? 

I was more scared of the episotomy than getting the epi too.  I didn't get an episotomy, I tore slightly but only needed 1 stitch.  I know I asked my ob/gyn about them and I think he said they don't do them much anymore around here.  I don't remember feeling the tear and I didn't hurt much afterwards.  I was only Tylenol while in the hospital and that pretty much took care of it - that and using the whirlpool tub a couple of times before I was discharged.  That was heavenly. 

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anne81
Message #1522 - 05/27/09 08:00 PM

  The thought of someone ramming a needle into my spine actually scares me more than giving birth.

When you're in labor it's not that bad.  The other pain kind of eclipses the fear of needles.  The epidural was worse on my husband than it was on me because he watched it being done.  The hospital I went too has a decent number of births each year so the anesthesiologist was great.  No pain until pushing time and light enough that I could push effectively.

Many people say natural birth isn't that bad

I think it's a chicken and egg kind of thing.  If the pain is not that bad it's easier to go through with a natural birth.  Every labor is different and every person's pain threshold is different.

This is TMI, but a friend said she tore really badly from the birth, her son was born in 10 minutes, and it didn't heal well.

There are different degrees of tearing.  The faster you push the more likely you are to have problems.    I have some issues down there I'm seeing a physical therapist for and I pushed for an hour.  The PT told me that two hours of pushing is good.  It's not uncommon.

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KrisKringleGingleBells
Message #1523 - 05/27/09 08:07 PM

Would it seem weird to say that I'm more terrified of the episotomy.

 

It doesn't seem weird to me at all because that's what makes me more afraid too.  One of my best friends had her first baby in February.  She had an epidural, but she didn't have an episiotomy, and she didn't tear at all.  Those are the kinds of stories I like to hear!

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ElfQ1015
Message #1524 - 05/27/09 08:38 PM

Would it seem weird to say that I'm more terrified of the episotomy. 

They generally don't do that anymore unless they absolutely have to.  Back when my parents were born they just did it to save time b/c they assumed you would tear (you were also put under b/c they believed you could not handle the pain).


Nowadays they don't cut you down there unless they really have to.

 

My mom did all natural twice, no tearing, minimal pain.  She said my brother hurt though, his head was 1 inch around bigger than mine otherwise he was the same length and weight.


So I am hoping my delivery goes the same way my mom's did.  Her ob/gyn gloated that that was the way to have a baby!  Totally textbook perfect, both times.

 

My mom also recommends keigiel exercises to strengthen abdominal muscles for pushing and it also helps your uterus spring back after birth,

[Virgil Showlion]

sbcaligirl
Message #1525 - 05/27/09 09:02 PM



DD had a huge head - 90th% to be exact - and I barely tore at all.  I needed one or two stitches for a small tear the midwife said would heal on its own but would heal a bit faster with the stitch.  I pushed for two hours which she said really helped prevent tearing in this case because I had more time to stretch out.  She also made me wait through several contractions at the end at various points to help guide the head out gentler. 

If you can listen and wait when they ask, it can help to minimize tearing though not pushing at that point was definitely a challenge.  As others have said, they don't do the epis anymore as a matter of routine but definitely ask your ob/gyn or midwife what their policy is and when they would need to do them.  Their answer will definitely help you gauge their policy and how you feel about it.  You can also ask what the policy how many times a nurse can stick you before someone else is supposed to take over.  I have very difficult veins so I always ask how many attempts they make before asking someone else.  I also know which veins are the best and always try to steer them in that direction to save me pain and them frustration.

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livingalmostlarge
Message #1526 - 05/28/09 02:27 PM

The friend who tore barely pushed.  Her baby was born really fast and labor less than 4 hours for a first baby and she was 34!  She said she hadn't planned on pushing that fast.

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MuttleynFelix
Message #1527 - 05/28/09 08:47 PM

When did you guys have your first doctor's appt for your pregnancy(ies)?  I called my gyn on Tuesday but she does not do OB and will not see you if you are pregnant. So I thought about going with someone else in her practice but I didn't know anyone who used any of them. I talked with my neighbor on Tuesday night and mentioned the guy she is using and he is in the same practice as another doctor who was recommended to me a couple years ago. So I called over there to see if either of them were accepting new patients and the nurse took my information and said they would call me back in 3-5 business days!  Well that puts me at like 8+ weeks before I even set my appointment and I know some docs don't like to see you until 9, but I just feel kind of irresponsible not seeing a doctor and we were planning on telling our parents after the doctor's appointment, but if it's going to be a while, I don't really want to wait much longer to tell them (I email my mom everyday and it is tough not to tell her how lousy I felt today).

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Wisconsin Beth
Message #1528 - 05/28/09 08:53 PM

With DD I went in at about 8 weeks.  They thought/assumed I wasn't that far along and I got sent for a dating u/s, which showed me as 4 weeks further along than the doctor though. 

With this one, we thought I was about 7/8 weeks along when I went in and I turned out to be only 6 weeks along. 

I go see my gp for confirmation, then make the appt. with the ob/gyn.  He's usually able to see me the same day unless he's off or doing surgery.  The other ob/gyn there is a woman and it's my understanding that you're going to have to wait to get in to see her.  I don't have a problem with a male ob/gyn and I LOVE being able to get appts. easily. 

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Holly Smith
Message #1529 - 05/29/09 01:55 AM

When I called to schedule my first appt, I was not quite four weeks along.  But the backlog meant that I was over 9 weeks when I got my first official appt.  I did have a short u/s a couple weeks prior to that, though, because I was having spotting and they wanted to make sure everything was okay.

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KrisKringleGingleBells
Message #1530 - 05/29/09 03:49 PM

This is my first pregnancy.  My doctor's office didn't want to see me until I was about 10 weeks pregnant, and that was only an appointment with a physician's assistant.  I never saw an actual doctor or had a real exam until I was 12 weeks along.  I thought that was a long time, especially for a first.  I basically went 12 weeks with no professional advice or guidance. 

[Virgil Showlion]

goddessofrock
Message #1531 - 05/29/09 07:10 PM



my best friend's husband is traumatized from seeing the doc tear her right before she got their daughter out!

 

I had minor tearing which required stitches and would rather have that than someone tear me!

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anne81
Message #1532 - 05/29/09 08:18 PM

I called to schedule my first appt as soon as I got a positive - around two weeks because I was testing like crazy.  They didn't want to see me until 8 or 9.  They said they can't see much on the ultrasound before then and it probably has something to do with the miscarriage rate too.  My dr's office does want you to come in right away if you don't know when you got pregnant so they can date your pregnancy.

edited: pushing was the most intense part but I have to say that the stitches were the most painful part for me.

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sbcaligirl
Message #1533 - 05/29/09 08:39 PM



I too called around week 2 or 3 to schedule an appointment but was told not to come in until week 7-9 for dating u/s and then week 11-12 for first ob appointment.  I thought it was weird too but I guess that's standard nowadays.  I did ask the midwife about it at first appt and she said there's not much they can do before week 11-12 besides confirm pregnancy since can't hear heartbeat etc.  She did say if there's any history of ectopic or other problems they'll see you right away but for a normal or 1st time, they wait.

I'm sure if you have any questions regarding what to do/not do, they can always answer those by phone.  I know I called to talk to a nurse about a few medications before my first appt and got good advice.

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Meg - Mommy to Averie
Message #1534 - 05/30/09 10:13 PM

It also took me longer to feel movement - I think I didn't feel it consistently until 23 weeks or so.

Yeah, I think I felt some movement shortly after the 16 week mark but I haven't noticed anything since then.  It kinda sucks because I have 2 friends that are pg and due about the same time as me (1 is 4 weeks before me, the other is 1 week before) and they have already felt theirs a bunch of times and I want to too!  We know we've got a kicker on our hands though - on both ultrasounds, he/she has been flailing around like mad. 

When did you guys have your first doctor's appt for your pregnancy(ies)?

I did the home test and when those came back positive, I went to my regular doctor to confirm.  Once he did, I made an appointment with the OB.  Regular doctor said to make the appointment for when I was about 10 weeks.  I thought that was really strange but he assured me it was par for the course.  The OB wouldn't see me before 8 weeks - I went at 9 weeks.  I see him every 4 weeks until week 20-something (26? 28? can't remember), then it's more often.  At my first appointment, they weren't going to do an ultrasound which also surprised me.  However, I requested one because my LMP was really short and light (unusual for me) and so I didn't know if it was a real one and we wanted to confirm the due date.  If it weren't for my placenta deal, I would only get the 20-week u/s for gender. 

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Holly Smith
Message #1535 - 05/31/09 01:43 AM

I actually started feeling movement very early, around 13 weeks.  I woke up in the middle of the night in a panic, thinking there had been an earthquake- but it was an earthquake only in my abdomen.  I felt it occasionally in the middle of the night after that until 16 weeks, when I started feeling it during the day.  DH started feeling it then too.  E was an incredible mover and shaker.  I remember doing the kick counts when she got to be further along- like 28 weeks, and counting 10 movements in a minute instead of an hour like they say you're supposed to do.  I think she kicked/moved about 500 times a day until I was around 8 months along.

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goddessofrock
Message #1536 - 06/01/09 04:11 PM



I went to the same office different floor and doctor.

 

When I took two tests, they had me go into the LAB for blood and urine tests for dating that week and then scheduled the first OB apointment from there because the first OB appointment they are just going to take your blood, start your paperwork, and then try to find the heartbeat.

[Virgil Showlion]

sweetKT
Message #1537 - 06/01/09 05:25 PM



Well ladies, I am officially pregnant with my second child.  I just went to my OB this morning for my first ultrasound and he says everything looks perfect. The little heartbeat was at 164 beats/min and I could already see the umbilical cord forming, which was interesting because last time (with my DD) I couldn't see that at all; she was a perfect peanut and this one is kind of blurry. But I was at 8 weeks exactly for DD and 8 weeks and 5 days for this one. I asked the dr and he said it really does make a difference!

Anyway, to add my birth story: I was at work when I stood up to go to the bathroom and my water broke. I called my husband, we met at the doctor's office (yes, I drove myself from work to the dr - it was only a 5 min drive and I wasn't feeling any contractions). He confirmed the break and sent us to the hospital. I wasn't dilated at all so they gave me 2 sleeping pills and they would wait until morning and, if no dilation had occurred, would induce me. I woke up six hours later at 10cm - I had slept through the whole thing! 20 minutes later I had an epidural and 30 minutes after that I had baby girl in my arms. I think I only pushed 3 or 4 times and the dr said he had to cut me just a bit (only 3 stitches). I didn't have any pain afterwards (thanks to the massive percocet pills) but even when I got home walking around was easy and it never hurt to go to the bathroom or anything. All in all, it was less than 12 hours from the time my water broke to the time my baby was born. They say it's easier the second time but I don't know how that could be true! I am worried I used up all my good karma with the first!

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sbcaligirl
Message #1538 - 06/01/09 05:52 PM

Congrats sweetKT!!  I think you should just assume the second will be easier or the same since I'm sure we all have good karma all the time! 

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anne81
Message #1539 - 06/01/09 07:50 PM

Congrats sweetKT!!

Holly - my friend also felt hers around 13 weeks.  I thought she was mistaking it until I found out I had an anterior placenta.

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boos_mom
Message #1540 - 06/01/09 07:57 PM



muttley - For #2, I called the OB at 4 weeks, but didn't get my 1st appt until 6 weeks (which she was not there b/c she was doing a delivery).  The nurse just did the confirmation test, gave me the bloodwork papers and scheduled my 8 week visit with the OB where we did a u/s in the office.  For #1, didn't know I was pregnant since I had just seen my GYN a couple of weeks before and had a negative pg test.  My GP sent me for a bloodtest since I was throwing up for like 5 days by then.  Hah!  Scheduled first visit with OB/GYN the following week, I think, but I didn't know how far along I was for #1 since my periods weren't all that frequent off the pill.  Congrats!

Congrats sweetKT!   

---

Wisconsin Beth
Message #1541 - 06/01/09 07:58 PM

They say it's easier the second time but I don't know how that could be true! I am worried I used up all my good karma with the first!

I'm afraid of that too!  lol.  I guess I'll find out in October though.    And Congratulations! 

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sweetKT
Message #1542 - 06/02/09 12:26 PM



Thanks for the warm welcome everyone!

Regarding the first doctor's appt: since this was my second child, my dr said I could skip the "confirmation" visit, which is basically the office doing the same test you did at home. I went straight to the first u/s, scheduled at "not before" 8 weeks. So much changes from weeks 6 to 8 and with everyone's fertile time occurring at different times in their cycle (not everyone ovulates on Day 14!) 8 weeks is the earliest they want to look so they can get good, reliable measurements and see the heartbeat. The blood work-up is usually at 12 weeks, second u/s at 20 weeks (measure growth, determine sex), and gestational diabetes test at 24 weeks. This schedule is of course if you are a first-timer with no problems or a second, third, fourth, etc -timer with no previous problems. I hope this info helps!

[Virgil Showlion]

ARMD
Message #1543 - 06/02/09 11:06 PM

I just had my first baby almost 5 months ago. I ended up being induced 2 weeks early because they kept finding extra protein in my urine. I also had gestational diabetes and Group B strep. I went in the night before I was to be induced to have my cervix softened in preparation. They gave me penicillin for the Group B strep at 6 something the next morning and then pitocin around 7 or 7:30 AM. The doctor checked me at around 9 I think and broke my water. It was awhile before I started feeling anything though. Once the contractions started, they got strong pretty quickly. I got really shaky and cold, and I was at 4 cm when they checked me. They called the anesthesiologist, but he was with another patient. So, we waited and waited and waited. My doctor finally came back around 10 something I think it was as I was not inclined to pay attention to what time it was at this point. I was in very heavy labor at this point and trying very hard to deal with the pain. She said she could give me something until the anthes. got there but needed to check me first to make sure I wasn't too far along. She checked me, and I was at 9-10 cm by that point, so she couldn't give me anything. She was scrubbing up when the anthes. finally arrived. My contractions were coming seconds apart it seemed by that point, so he ended up giving me a spinal. It wasn't too bad except for the fact I was having contractions as he did the spinal. Once the spinal was done, I felt immediate relief. They were then able to get me situated to give birth. I felt no pain whatsoever after the spinal.  They actually had to watch the monitor to tell when I was having contractions and when I needed to push. I ended up pushing for quite awhile. I also ended up with a third degree episitomy because there just wasn't enough room for the head period. They are also only done around here if they are really needed. I didn't realize how common it is to throw up during labor, but I had really bad acid reflux during my pregnancy and threw up during labor. The episiotomy was definitely painful but they did give me meds and ice pack pads for it. The worst part was moving in bed to reach the baby or trying to get out of the bed or a chair. I was glad for the extra day in the hospital as it wasn't as painful when I did go home. I remember being in a lot of pain but don't recall exactly what it felt like. I definitely plan on some type of pain relief for my next one considering what my first was like. The main drawback for me was the huge headaches that I got after having had the spinal. They did go away after a few days though. Overall time for labor and delivery for me was around 3-4 hours. They say it usually takes longer if you're induced, so I think I'm glad that I was induced or I might not have made it to the hospital in time if I had gone into natural labor.

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MuttleynFelix
Message #1544 - 06/03/09 12:59 AM



SweetKT - Congrats.

THanks for all the advice on first appointments. I have one scheduled with the same doctor the neighbor raved about on June 18. By conventional dating, I'll be more than 10 weeks along, but eh such is life.  We'll just have to try not tell too many more people before then because have told a ton and I was like we need to wait until I go to the doctor, but I am so not able to keep this a secret.

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Meg - Mommy to Averie
Message #1545 - 06/03/09 05:10 AM

Muttleyn, we weren't able to keep it a secret either.

We signed up for all the baby e-mails and they're like "Oh, you might not want to tell people before you're 12 weeks because 12 weeks is when the potential for miscarriage goes down a bunch."  Well, we confirmed with the doctor when I was 4w1d.  We told ourselves we were going to wait until my mom's birthday and surprise her then (this is the first grandbaby on my side) which was about 5 weeks from that day.  We ended up going up to their house that weekend to tell them and telling all our friends on Facebook the next week!  It's just too hard to keep to yourself, especially when it's your first.

---

KrisKringleGingleBells
Message #1546 - 06/03/09 01:42 PM

I didn't realize how common it is to throw up during labor

 

It is?  Ladies, did anyone else throw up?  There is a reason that women don't talk about these things until they're already pregnant or have delivered.  It's because no one would intentionally get pregnant if they told us all of the awful stuff that goes along with pregnancy and delivery.  I have to admit that I've had a pretty easy pregnancy so far.  I officially start Week 22 tomorrow.  I thought I wanted a natural childbirth.  The more I hear the more I think they should just knock me out like they did 60 years ago.  I'll see the baby when I wake up.

 

As far as telling people about our pregnancy, this is our first.  We told our parents and siblings right away.  I also told my best friend who just had her first baby a few months ago because I needed someone to talk to and ask questions.  We didn't start telling everyone until week 12, but it was really hard to keep it a secret.

---

goddessofrock
Message #1547 - 06/03/09 01:48 PM



Congrats Sweet!

 

Some of my work friends tend to give a little too much information so I asked them not to say too much about labor and delivery... some of their non-preggo stories scare me to begin with!

---

sbcaligirl
Message #1548 - 06/03/09 02:32 PM

I threw up quite a bit during delivery (about once every hour or so) until they gave me Zofran.  The midwife told me that a lot of women throw up at least once during delivery but some have a bigger issue than others and there's no way to tell until you're in delivery.  I didn't have an issue with morning sickness really so it was quite unexepected during labor that I would have such a problem.  However, let me tell you, the Zofran was like the nectar of the gods when they gave it to me.  Within minutes I felt better!

[Virgil Showlion]

The Reflector - WIR
Message #1549 - 06/03/09 02:59 PM



I threw up during labor too, several times.  DH actually thought that was more gross than watching the head come out!  I had just eaten a huge dinner (steak, potatoes, green beans) right before my water broke though, that might have something to do with it.  No one ever told me I might throw up, it was a complete surprise.  The other surprise is that my water kept breaking over and over.  I thought it was a one time gush, but I kept feeling smaller gushes from time to time, all the way to the hospital and even after I was there.  I wore a pad in the car to save the seats!

 

We told people very early with DD1, around 5-6 weeks.  With DD2 we waited until around 10 weeks because we were going to see family in person and wanted to tell them then.  We're planning child #3 now but we're probably going to wait a while to tell everyone.  DD2 was 12 weeks premature and it was a pretty hard road (fortunately she's just fine now), this next pregnancy is going to be a bear.  I'll need constant monitoring and blood thinner injections every day.  We're thinking of trying to wait until the 20 week ultrasound to tell people because then we'll know if everything is progressing well or if we're going to have issues again.  It may be hard to hide it that long though.  I guess we'll see what happens!

---

KrisKringleGingleBells
Message #1550 - 06/03/09 03:38 PM



Wow, I had no idea about this vomiting thing.

 

Good luck with #3 Reflector.  There's no way we could have waited until 20 weeks.  I was definitely showing by then!  Plus, no one who knows me would believe that I just suddenly gave up wine for 5 months for no reason.  I had a hard time tricking people for a few weeks!

---

ElfQ1015
Message #1551 - 06/03/09 04:01 PM



My friend told me she threw up.  Her husband said he has never seen so much in his life.

 

I asked my mom about it and she was fine.  She also did not go #2 on the table either like a lot of people claim women do.  She said she got really bad poos right before she went into labor and unless you have to go the bottom 2/3 of your colon is clean.  So there is no reason to really fear a bowel movement on the table.

---

Holly Smith
Message #1552 - 06/03/09 04:24 PM

I puked my guts out in the first hour of real labor.  But that might have been an effect of the pre-e more than the labor itself.

---

Wisconsin Beth
Message #1553 - 06/03/09 06:21 PM

I didn't puke at all.  I did poop though.  My L&D nurse just scooped it up and flushed it right away.  I figured if they're an L&D nurse, they're used to it so why worry about it? 

---

ElfQ1015
Message #1554 - 06/03/09 06:23 PM

My mom said even if you do, you are too busy to really care or notice!

[Virgil Showlion]

anne81
Message #1555 - 06/03/09 07:28 PM

I vomited my whole pregnancy but not once during labor.  I felt the best I had in my whole pregnancy once the epidural went in. 

---

The Reflector - WIR
Message #1556 - 06/06/09 01:02 AM



kgb18 - yeah, we may not be able to keep it a secret that long, my belly may betray me or my big fat mouth will. 

Has anyone had success selling baby stuff on Ebay or Craigslist?  We're doing a purge of unnecessary toys/clothes/baby junk. 

---

Holly Smith
Message #1557 - 06/06/09 03:40 AM

Reflector, I haven't, but you might try local secondhand baby stores as well.  Help the local economy and not have to ship out a bunch of individual items.  I'd find the one with the biggest markup, though, so you get a better price for it.

---

anne81
Message #1558 - 06/06/09 04:43 AM

Reflector - have you checked to see when your local big consignment sales are?  Where I live they have them three or four times a year in the convention center.  You tag the clothes and toys yourself but they are organized into sizes, etc. by volunteers.  You get a larger audience that way.

---

livingalmostlarge
Message #1559 - 06/06/09 03:25 PM

How much weight did people gain on average?  Was it easy to lose?

---

anne81
Message #1560 - 06/06/09 05:15 PM

I gained 47 lbs.  I gained in fits in spurts but was on track until about 30 weeks.  After that I just piled on the weight.  However I'd lose and gain 5 lbs in a day so I think a lot of that was bloat.   I lost it all by 6 weeks.  Losing the weight doesn't mean that you'll fit in your old clothes though.  Everything is redistributed differently and nursing makes a difference too.  Now my baby is 5 months and all of the sudden I've lost another 5 lbs so I'm below my prebaby weight.  This is also my first baby.  A lot of women on my birth board are saying the weight is more difficult to take off with their second.  It's hard to say why though.

[Virgil Showlion]

Meg - Mommy to Averie
Message #1561 - 06/06/09 09:38 PM

Thought I would share the happy news with all you ladies.  We had an ultrasound done today at an outside ultrasound clinic to find out the gender (just couldn't wait anymore!).  As you'll see from my screen name, we are having a GIRL!  And her legs are quite long - measuring at 20w1d and I am 19w3d today.  DH and I were both really hoping for a girl, though obviously we would have been just as thrilled with a boy.  But now we to have to start narrowing down our list of 9 girl names!!

---

Holly Smith
Message #1562 - 06/07/09 04:16 AM

Congrats on the baby girl!  It's been said by many, many people I know that girl clothes are more fun to shop for.  Although that means it could get expensive, too.  But that means you can expect tons of newborn outfits if you have a baby shower.

---

anne81
Message #1563 - 06/07/09 05:40 PM

Congrats on your little girl! 

---

livingalmostlarge
Message #1564 - 06/07/09 07:30 PM

I've heard that the weight comes off but sometimes clothes can't fit even if you are below pregnancy weight.

Congrats on the baby girl!

---

Holly Smith
Message #1565 - 06/07/09 11:23 PM

I gained 17 lbs over the pregnancy, and managed to gain yet another four lbs in the hospital (IV fluids and mag sulfate).  I lost 25 lbs in the first two weeks, and none of my pants/shorts fit.  Over the past year, I've managed to gain 10 lbs of that back, and I'm nowhere close to any of it fitting.  I just went out and bought some new pants/shorts and concluded that I wore that stuff for about five years so it was about worn out anyway (which is true).

---

kristi28
Message #1566 - 06/08/09 02:19 AM



Congrats Megara!  I (we?) also was delighted to learn that ours was a baby girl.  I agree about the temptation to buy clothes, but I think that we were given more outfits for baby girl because of how cute they are.

Weight gain?  I gained 46 lbs, and that was before I got into the hospital.  Like Holly, I gained more in the hospital on fluids and magnesium.  Much of mine was just fluid, though - I didn't barely leave the bathroom for a couple of weeks, and then I weighed only about 10 lbs more than I started at.  At six months, I now weigh slightly less than my pre-preg weight.  My clothes still don't fit very well.  My chest is larger, I have more muscle, my waistline is bigger, and my weight is smaller.  I should probably buy some new things, too, but I'm cheap.

[Virgil Showlion]

Holly Smith
Message #1567 - 06/08/09 02:37 AM

In the first few days home from the hospital, I lost all that water weight from every source imaginable- sweating, in the bathroom, out my eyes.  I would be bawling my head off for no apparent reason, and I would even be laughing at the fact that I had no control over it.  The peeing that had become a trickle at the end of my pregnancy became like Niagara falls after E was born.  The day I got home, I got on the scale and saw I had gained 4 lbs from the end of my pregnancy.  The next morning, I got on the scale and saw that I had lost 10 lbs.  The next morning, I had lost another 5.  It was crazy to lose weight that fast.

---

Wisconsin Beth
Message #1568 - 06/08/09 03:35 PM

Congratulations Megera!  Yeah, cute girls stuff is everywhere.  :-)  I haven't looked for boy stuff much so I can't really say how much is out there. 

I gained 31 lbs with DD - 14 of it in the last 2 months of pregancy.  Afterwards, it just peeled off.  I made sure I drank a lot of water and ate healthy but didn't do much exercising.  Although carrying the baby around must count towards something!  I did bf and I ended up 10 lbs under my pregancy weight.  But I still had about 40+ to go when we found out I was pregnant again.  lol.  But as mentioned, your prepregnancy clothes probably won't fit right afterwards anyway, because your body changes a lot during pregnancy. 

---

boos_mom
Message #1569 - 06/08/09 06:23 PM



Congrats megera!  You definitely do get cute girl outfits as gifts, but many of them weren't my taste (too frilly), so I exchanged a lot of stuff for onesies and basics.  But, I did end up buying a lot of clothes for my first.  And I also got somewhat obssessed with Gymboree because they have such cute girl clothes.  I've gotten most of it out of my system, but whew!  Boy clothes are so boring (and much smaller selections) compared to girl clothes.  I don't really shop for my boy too much, but my girl's closet and drawers have tons of clothes.

With #1, I gained 35 lbs.  (Not sure about any weight gain in the hospital, I never stepped on a scale after checking in.)  I lost all of the weight by six weeks post-partum.  But, I had the muffin-top syndrome which lasted for months after that, and the tummy didn't really look like "pre-baby" for a couple of years!  I think I could fit into my clothes comfortably within 3 months.  With #2, I gained 25 lbs. and lost all of the weight by six weeks again.  I think I could fit my jeans comfortably again within 3 months.  For me, it was mostly the mid-section that took the longest to shrink down.  And, you get nice toned arms from carrying around baby all the time.  My arms look the best when the baby is little.  Once they don't want to be carried as much, then the arms don't look as nice.

---

sweetKT
Message #1570 - 06/08/09 06:49 PM



Congrats megera ! Little girls are so much fun. I can't decide if I want this one to be a boy or girl and am glad the decision is not up to me!

As for pregnancy weight, I gained a whopping 70 lbs (10 lbs in the last 4 days). Much of that was water weight - I had some of the worst foot swelling my doctor had ever seen. But my hands and face were fine and my blood pressure was completely normal so it wasn't pre-e or anything serious - just a bad case of retaining water. At my six week visit, I had lost 30 lbs and by my 6 month visit I had lost another 20. The last 10 lbs took me another 6 months to lose because I wasn't motivated (since I could now fit into size 8, I didn't see much point in a size 6). Plus, like boos, it was all in my waist, which is the hardest part (for me) of the body to tone back up. I started this pregnancy at the same weight as my last one and so far I am gaining at a slower rate. I am hoping to keep it under 50 lbs this time! I am exercising more than last time (thank you pool and Wii Fit ) and have banished pizza rolls from my house so hopefully this will help.

---

sbcaligirl
Message #1571 - 06/08/09 10:35 PM

I gained about 40 lbs with DD and have since lost 20ish at almost 8 weeks.  I lost the first 10-15 within a few days of her birth since I think that was mainly her and fluids, the rest came off within a few weeks.  I've somewhat plateaued but I'm not really trying to lose anything so I'm not surprised.  I wanted to give myself some time to get used to her and our new schedule before tackling weight loss.  I'm also not breastfeeding anymore which I'm sure makes a difference.  I've always heard that BF helps you lose weight but unfortunately I wasn't able to do so. 
As far as clothes, I'd say about 1/2 of them fit.  Most of my shirts fit except some are a bit too short now with the bigger chest.  Most of my pants summer fit since they're mainly pull-on pants with out zippers and button waists.  I'm hoping to be able to fit my jeans by the fall but haven't tried them on yet since they're packed away for summer.

---

Meg - Mommy to Averie
Message #1572 - 06/09/09 12:44 AM

Yeah, I am having trouble restraining myself from buying outfits.  I will admit I have bought a few (there had been some I'd been ooh-ing and aah-ing over but I at least got them on super-duper clearance).  I'm sure I will get a TON of clothes at baby showers (I'm having 2 from what I know - my SILs do one and my aunt already told me she wants to do one too). 

Here's an etiquette question - if I feel like I've got more than enough outfits for a certain age range (probably the newborn and 0-3 range since that's what people like to buy), is it horrible/tacky of me to exchange those outfits for non-clothing baby stuff (bottles, bibs, etc.) that we maybe didn't get?  I mean, it's not like said gift-giver of clothes would know unless they inspected the closet but I just didn't know if it was tacky to exchange their gift for something else entirely (not just a different size) and basically not tell them.

[Virgil Showlion]

Shelly527IN
Message #1573 - 06/09/09 01:05 AM

I woke up six hours later at 10cm - I had slept through the whole thing! 20 minutes later I had an epidural and 30 minutes after that I had baby girl in my arms. I think I only pushed 3 or 4 times and the dr said he had to cut me just a bit (only 3 stitches). I didn't have any pain afterwards (thanks to the massive percocet pills) but even when I got home walking around was easy and it never hurt to go to the bathroom or anything.

sweetKT----- Congrats!  I'm not even TTC, but whenever it does happen...I wanna have a labor like your!  

---

Holly Smith
Message #1574 - 06/09/09 01:09 AM

I don't think it's poor etiquette to do that in our society.  I mean, if you were to complain endlessly and then call them to tell them you exchanged it, that would be one thing; to just quietly exchange it would be another.  That said, be careful on how much you think you'll need, especially in the smallest sizes.  It's hard to tell if your baby's going to be a spitter, and that could mean going through 5 onesies or more every day.  Elizabeth was not a spitter, not even a little bit.  We only changed her onesies once day because we felt like we should.  I would not consider having less than 15 shirts/onesies in any size if the baby is not a spitter, probably 20-30 if she was.  I don't like spending a lot of money but you get a lot of this as gifts in the first few months, so having that stuff on hand is better than having to do laundry every two days.

If they bought a special outfit, I'd be more reticent to exchange it.  They may have spent hours picking it out.  Actually, the only thing I exchanged was some of the Gerber cloth diapers because we got about 100 of them.  I wouldn't expect too much to be bought off your registry or a lot of things you actually need because that is not how most people function when it comes to buying gifts for expectant mothers.  I try to buy something really interesting and practical for people given my recent experience with a newborn, but most people buy clothes.

You haven't suggested this, but I read this online all the time: women are upset when they don't get what they need for baby shower or from relatives.  I always get annoyed when I read this because I think, "You planned for this child [almost all of them did].  Why can't you buy the stuff you need and just appreciate what others give you?"  I think you're okay if you don't get to acting like this.

---

sbcaligirl
Message #1575 - 06/09/09 01:33 AM

I told people we were expecting DD to be on the big size so we hardly got any newborn size stuff, which is what I wanted.  We got tons of bigger stuff so we have quite a supply of clothes for her through 12 mo sizes.  If you end up with tons of somewhat practical clothes, I'd say wait to return them if possible until after she's born and you know what size she'll start out at and how quick she grows.  Some babies grow really fast and go through sizes really fast and others don't so you won't know right away what you'll need.  We actually ended up needing to get some newborn stuff since she was smaller than anticipated - she measured big at my 20 week ultrasound (about 2 weeks ahead like your DD with very long legs too!) and while she was very long, she was also quite skinny so even newborn stuff tended to fall off of her.
Also, you may change your mind about how many items you want to have on hand after she's born.  A lot of people gave us receiving blankets (to the point where we have somewhere in the 20-30 range) that I didn't think we'd need but I decided to keep them until after she was born and I'm glad I did.  We go through 3-4 blankets a day because she inevitably spits up on them or her bottle gets spilled on them.  I second Holly's suggestion of having lots of outfits on hand if you find out she's a spitter.  DD spits up constantly and we end up needing to changing her several times a day, even with keeping her in the same outfit for smaller incidents. For basics though, you might want to wait to see what works best before stocking up. I actually like the shirts that snap on the side rather than onesies since she hates having things pulled over her head so I have a bunch of those and just some hand-me-down and consignment onesies.  I think anne81 also said her son wasn't a fan of onesies even though everyone to buy tons of them.
If you end up with things you don't need, I don't think there's anything wrong with exchanging them even if it's for non-clothes items.  I think most people shop for clothes since they're so cute and it tends to be a bit easier than other things.  I even had a lot of people include gift receipts and say I was free to exchange their gift for whatever I wanted or needed.  Most people who would give you a baby gift really just want to celebrate with you and want to be helpful.

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goddessofrock
Message #1576 - 06/09/09 12:43 PM



Congrats Megera!

 

The weight~~ I gained 33 pounds total with AJ. Most of it in the end of the second trimester into the third. My doctor said 25-35 pounds is average/what they want you to gain. Less is not good for the baby and more is harder for you to take off afterwards...

 

I am about 5 pounds over my pre-preggo weight but I have been having a stressful time and have been eating lots of chocolate and icecream.... plus the working/pumping thing makes you feel like you have tapeworm (hungry every hour or two.)  AJ is 5 months old.

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sjk279
Message #1577 - 06/09/09 02:10 PM



HI ladies... am going to check with you before posting on the main board but I have an appt with a specialist in 3 weeks. I'm looking at potentially IVF which the cost alone is daunting. Since I have no infertility coverage, if any of you have gone through the process, how did you pay for it? Loans, saving like crazy, grants, etc? Any info would be greatly appreciated.

 

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Wisconsin Beth
Message #1578 - 06/09/09 02:42 PM

Meg, I returned clothing and duplicates from my shower and used the money/gift card to buy other baby stuff.  In the Thank you's I simply thanked them for the item and mentioned either enjoying or missing their presence at the shower.  I know I mentioned it to my Mom and I think one of my sisters and no one found it tacky at all. 

Also, I registered for a variety of sizes of onesies and things.  And they were all bought!  Plus more.  I love my sister (and Godmother of DD) for buying clothes and ALWAYS giving the current size plus 1 size up.  It's fabulous to know that if DD suddenly has a growth spurt, I've got at least 1 item in the closet that will fit her...  I do try to shop the clearance racks for next year, but I'm guessing at sizes.  I guessed wrong on DD needing 18 month fuzzy sleepers for this fall because she's wearing them now!  Sadly, they have Santa's on them, but they're warm and the weather here is still iffy some nights.

[Virgil Showlion]

digginouttadebt
Message #1579 - 06/09/09 02:58 PM

Exchanging- I don't feel badly about exchanging anything (unless it was something a grandparent made a huge deal of or something).  Just make sure you write the thank you note.  A funny thing happened at my shower- I received a ton of Johnson baby soaps/lotions.  DD1 was allergic to Johnsons, so I only use Baby Magic.  I took all the Johnson's stuff back to wal-mart and had over $35 put on a gift card.  I just found it funny that I received $35 worth of baby soap that would have lasted a year (or two!). 

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Meg - Mommy to Averie
Message #1580 - 06/09/09 03:49 PM

You haven't suggested this, but I read this online all the time: women are upset when they don't get what they need for baby shower or from relatives.  I always get annoyed when I read this because I think, "You planned for this child [almost all of them did].  Why can't you buy the stuff you need and just appreciate what others give you?"

I don't think I'll be that way.  Of course, I WANT people to buy the stuff on the registry but I'm not going to be upset if they don't.  We have enough stashed away that if we had to buy every single thing we would need, we could.  Luckily, mom and MIL have already committed to buying the stroller and carseat.  I got a $250 gift card from my job for getting employee of the month so we're using that for the crib set (it's on sale and we're honestly not expecting anyone in our family to spring for $180 crib bedding so we'd just rather buy it ourselves so we can start picking paint colors and then exchange for other items on the registry if someone does end up getting it).  We've already bought the furniture so there's not too many big-ticket items left.  We didn't register for any actual outfits (just onesies basically) because we figured people will buy what they think is cute and I'm fine with that.  I THINK we'll be set.  But of course, I have no idea what our baby will end up actually going through. 

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Wisconsin Beth
Message #1581 - 06/09/09 05:49 PM

A funny thing happened at my shower- I received a ton of Johnson baby soaps/lotions.  DD1 was allergic to Johnsons, so I only use Baby Magic.  I took all the Johnson's stuff back to wal-mart and had over $35 put on a gift card.  I just found it funny that I received $35 worth of baby soap that would have lasted a year (or two!).

LOL, I still have about 4 bottles of unopened baby soap plus bottles of lotion.  I've been using some of the Breck stuff for me instead of DD, since we got so much of it.  And she's 13 months old yet.  We are so set for baby soap!  I think I kept it all assuming that we'd go though it faster than we are. 

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Holly Smith
Message #1582 - 06/09/09 06:37 PM

(it's on sale and we're honestly not expecting anyone in our family to spring for $180 crib bedding so we'd just rather buy it ourselves so we can start picking paint colors and then exchange for other items on the registry if someone does end up getting it).

Honestly, I'd wait on buying any expensive baby bedding.  Fluffy blankets/quilts are not supposed to be used until one year, crib bumpers are a suffocation hazard and then a climbing hazard, pillows are not to be used either, and sheets are very inexpensive at Ikea or other places like it.  The only thing you need in the crib for the first year is a crib and a mattress protector.  Both can be purchased for about $20 total.

I would wait on the bedding until you can actually use it.  Then you can see what your child likes.  For example, my 13-month-old daughter loves teddy bears.  If I were to buy her a crib set it would be focused on teddy bears.  But I looked at a few before she was born and I wanted dragonflies.

There really is so little that an infant needs in the beginning, and a lot of the stuff that you buy because you think you need it ends up going to friends who are having their babies, sold on Craigslist, returned to the store, or donated.

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anne81
Message #1583 - 06/09/09 10:01 PM

Yup - even now that DS is wearing 12-18 month clothes we still don't use too many of the onesies.  Little shortalls now that it's summer or the zippered sleep and plays.  I remember looking at all the clothing we had and thinking we had way too much (one drawer full for a new baby) and being shocked at how quickly we went through it.  You can go through 3-5 outfits in a day easily but it doesn't add up to a load of laundry.  I was also surprised at the amount of receiving blankets I needed, in different sizes.

Wisconsin Beth is right about babies jumping up a size pretty suddenly so it's nice to have things in a range.  I didn't believe it till I experienced it but it literally feels like one day something fits and the next day it doesn't.  I did read a study that showed that babies can grow a centimeter overnight.

It is nuts how long baby soap and shampoo lasts - I just bought my second bottle of baby soap and DS is over 5 months old.  His bottle of foaming shampoo is still going strong.

For the bedding I found a really cute quilt and bedskirt at pottery barn on clearance.  Like Holly said you're not supposed to use the bumpers or the quilts so I skipped the bumper and hung the quilt on the wall as a decoration.  I figure he can use it in his toddler bed.  The bedskirt made me feel as if I'd decorated the bed.  Also you may be surprised at how little time your baby spends in his crib in the beginning months.

Speaking of shopping - I wish I'd never set foot into Gymboree.  I work the clearance, get the coupons, do gymbucks, have the credit card for the discount, etc. but I'm out of control.  And have you guys checked out the websites mamabargains and babysteals?  They had organic sleepsacks for $12, see kai run shoes half off, eek!

sjk279 - good luck with your appointment!  I have no idea as to the costs.

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Meg - Mommy to Averie
Message #1584 - 06/09/09 11:40 PM

I thought the crib bumpers were okay as long as they weren't really pillowy and thick.  The $180 is for the whole crib set, which has seemed pretty comparable between Babies R Us, Target, etc.  It comes with the bumper, window valance, crib sheets, quilt (we will display this on the wall) and the bumpers are pretty thin.  

[Virgil Showlion]

anne81
Message #1585 - 06/10/09 12:09 AM

sjk279 - I asked on the Fertility Friends IVF board and the answers ranged between 12-16k depending on how many meds they had to take.

megera - DS loves to shove his face into things which I think might be the concern with even the thin bumpers.  He scared me in his cosleeper because he'd scooch to the corner and put his face on the fabric side as deep as he get his nose in. That's when I started getting serious about moving him to his crib because of the better air circulation.

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bogart
Message #1586 - 06/10/09 02:27 AM

sjk279 I did IVF 4 times to conceive my son.  We had some insurance coverage but basically spent about $50K total over 4 years (this also included a vasectomy reversal that didn't work and some frozen transfers).

It's hard.  We earn a reasonably good income, which helped, ditto the (limited) insurance, and we just dedicated as much $$$ as we could toward treatment.  But we also took on a lot of debt and are continuing to pay it down.  Having good credit and doing this in the era of 0% balance transfer offers (the reversal attempt was 2002 and our son was conceived in 2006) helped.  There is some finance out there specific to infertility treatment, and while I didn't use it (because at the time we had better offers elsewhere), I think it may now be a better alternative (in relative terms) than it used to be.  Ordering meds from abroad (generally the UK) can help a bit, and I understand some clinics are now offering some reduced rates, presumably because of the recession.  We used FSAs and did get tax deductions some years because our non-FSA expenses exceeded 7.5% of our AGI.

I'm sorry you're finding you need to look into this.  It stinks.

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sjk279
Message #1587 - 06/10/09 01:37 PM



THanks for all the advice ladies... yeah, I'm finally at peace with the potential future... better than every month not knowing what would happen.

Bogart, thanks for the email. I'll probably email you today or tomorrow.

And another question, a lot of my friends are having 2nd babies. Since I love buying gifts, any suggestions? I like to throw in something fun for the mom (think Cold Stone gift card/foot lotion etc) but what about the baby?

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Meg - Mommy to Averie
Message #1588 - 06/10/09 03:52 PM

I like to throw in something fun for the mom (think Cold Stone gift card/foot lotion etc) but what about the baby?

I think a popular gift for second babies is stuff you'll need everyday like diapers and wipes, since you typically already have all the big stuff like strollers, etc. (unless there is a big age gap between the first and second child).  We've got a stash of diapers in lots of sizes (a couple giant boxes in each size up to size 3) and think we should be able to make it the first few months without buying any.  Or maybe a cute outfit or a new blanket? 

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23456
Message #1589 - 06/10/09 06:33 PM



I ended gaining around 32 lbs, but only had 16 lbs to lose when I got home from the hospital.  By my 6 wk. check-up I was back to my pre-pregnancy weight albeit a bit flabby.  I think it was the breastfeeding/pumping because I definitely wasn't exercising or dieting during that time.  My baby is now 12 weeks and my body/waist is pretty much back to it's pre-pregnancy shape with the exception of larger boobs, which I assume will deflate once I stop pumping. 

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hope-potential
Message #1590 - 06/10/09 07:19 PM



I gained about 45-50 lbs. with my twins.  Lost about 28 lbs. in the hospital.  The kids were a total of 13 lbs.

I was back in my regular jeans in 6 weeks.  I consider myself very lucky!

[Virgil Showlion]

boos_mom
Message #1591 - 06/16/09 12:03 AM

And another question, a lot of my friends are having 2nd babies. Since I love buying gifts, any suggestions? I like to throw in something fun for the mom (think Cold Stone gift card/foot lotion etc) but what about the baby?

Money or gift card to Target, Walmart, Toys R Us, wherever mom buys diapers and baby supplies.  Of course, if you do want to buy something, defintely go with practical items and a gift receipt.  I'll also buy an outfit/onesie if second baby is a different gender than the first one.  I also throw in a little book/toy/gift for the older sibling just so that the sibling does not feel left out. 

sjk - best wishes to you.

I'm amazed that #2 is nearly a year old so soon!  My freedom from pumping is in sight, I just have to find a way to stop! 

Any recommendations on how to stop pumping without giving oneself an infection/mastitis?  I don't like the idea of pumping just to relieve the discomfort.  Once I start the pumping, it's hard to just stop and see only a little bit of milk and have to wash everything anyway.  I'm thinking of doing cabbage leaves and shorter pumping sessions.  #2 has almost weaned himself, as he's getting lazier by the day and does not find BF-ing to be of use as he gets mad when the milk does not come out within a couple seconds of feeding (impatient fella).  I've got enough milk in the freezer to stop pumping now, but I always have trouble with figuring out how to do it comfortably. 

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Holly Smith
Message #1592 - 06/16/09 01:27 AM

I've got another five months of pumping (I'm planning to be completely done when E is about 18 months), but I've had some good advice from people in the know.  Start increasing the length of time between pumping sessions.  For example, if you pump every 3 hours, then pump every 4 hours for several days or a week, then five hours, then six hours, and so on.  Then once you're pumping really infrequently (say once a day) and you're not hugely engorged, you start cutting back the amount of time you pump in that session until you're not pumping at all.

I really, really would not just stop pumping abruptly.  I haven't had mastitis but I know people who have and it's deeply unpleasant.

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KrisKringleGingleBells
Message #1593 - 06/16/09 01:18 PM



I wasn't going to let anyone throw me a baby shower since DH and I just got married last summer and everyone bought us gifts.  I didn't want to be greedy.  I finally gave in and told my mom we could have a small shower because a lot of friends and family were asking her when my shower was and wanted to buy me gifts.  I think it's nice that people want to give us presents for the baby.  We'll be happy with whatever we are given.

 

I did start to buy some summer clothes for next year since everything is on clearance.  I'm guessing at the sizes a bit, but I tried to buy 9 to 12 months sizes, so they should work for at least part of the summer.  We haven't had a baby girl in my family since I was born, so everyone is too excited not to buy dresses and pink things.

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boos_mom
Message #1594 - 06/16/09 07:28 PM



holly - I did have mastitis once with #2, and I definitely don't want to go through it again. 

kgb - We received a lot of gifts which we never would have bought, things seasoned parents know about but newbies don't.  We were always grateful for everything, no matter what it was.  And, you're right, there's something about a baby that people just want to give a gift to share their excitement and happiness with you.  Have fun!  note: I did not want to dress my DD up in pink.  But, then I realized that pink perfectly compliments her skintone and she looked so nice in pink.  But, I tried really hard not to buy pink outfits.  Of course, she loves pink now anyway, despite all of my efforts.    

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MuttleynFelix
Message #1595 - 06/16/09 07:54 PM

kgb - As soon as I told people at church I was pregnant, the first thing out of their mouth was BABY SHOWER!  Since there is another woman due around the same time as me I think they are going to throw us a joint baby shower.  They are so excited.  I am going to be just incredibly grateful to anyone who wants to buy me anything (and I will be writing thank you notes for a long time). 

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KrisKringleGingleBells
Message #1596 - 06/17/09 01:38 PM

I am going to be just incredibly grateful to anyone who wants to buy me anything

That's how I feel too, muttley.  It's funny, my MIL just asked me last night if I wanted her to throw me a shower for DH's family or if I would rather have a small luncheon with a few people or just one big gift from her and my FIL.  I told her I really didn't care, and I wouldn't be upset if she didn't have a shower. (Secretly I was thinking, please no shower because DH's extended family are full of drama and a bit on the crazy side.)  Then my MIL said, "Thank goodness because I really didn't want to deal with all of the family drama." 

[Virgil Showlion]

lucibelle82
Message #1597 - 06/22/09 08:04 PM



Hi everybody, I've never written on this thread before but I think now would be a good time to begin.  I'm due in November, and it sounds like a lot of you are expecting now too!

For you other moms, how did you manage to keep a food budget while pregnant? I've been on the racers board for a while, and we were making some good financial headway. But now I just seem to derail every plan we make by buying FOOD. I'm doing very well at keeping groceries stocked in the house and cooking things to bring to work for lunch & dinner (2 jobs means 2 meals away from home). But my problem is, I either feel nauseated looking at/smelling what I brought, or I have an insatiable craving for something completely different (lately it's been Italian beef with hot peppers - yum). So I've been spending a lot of money eating out. I thought this would get better after the first trimester, but it's not. Well, there's less nausea now, but the cravings are much worse. I've never experienced anything like it before! 

I'm feeling so frustrated by it, even though my DH is being very patient and understanding with me.

Do you have any helpful hints you could pass on to me? We don't have a lot of extra right now, so we really need to be putting it towards savings instead of my belly.

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sbcaligirl
Message #1598 - 06/22/09 09:58 PM

Lucibelle82: Can u bring options to keep at work for days when your regular lunch doesn't appeal?  When I was pregnant I always kept extra granola bars and crackers and such in my purse to both help with the nausea and to help if I had a sudden craving for food while I was out and about.  As far as cravings go, can you just bring the Italian beef with peppers from home?  Is that something you can make instead of buy? 

When I really couldn't stand whatever grocery items we had, I just used my allowance money to go out.  Granted, I spent most of my allowance on food for several months but whatever - I had to make it thru somehow.   

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livingalmostlarge
Message #1599 - 06/22/09 10:20 PM

I need advice, I am off b/c finally and going to see an ob/gyn next Tuesday.  It's been around two months, but I've been in a lot of pain this past month mostly.  It constantly feels like cramping and I can't predict when I'm due for my period.  Anyway, I even have sex after and during sex for the first time.  Advice?

I wanted to move up my ob/gyn appointment, but I wasn't sure if I would be bleeding.  Turns out it started this Sunday.  But I'm just feeling very tired.  I want to have sex, but it's been like 5 times this past month and I'm fearful because i cramp nearly everyday.  Thanks for any tips.

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anne81
Message #1600 - 06/22/09 11:18 PM

lucibelle - congrats on your pregnancy!  I totally blew my food budget while pregnant.  It's been getting better but I'm still struggling because I'm breastfeeding.  It's beyond a craving - it's almost like a compulsion to have a very specific food right then and then the next day the same food will make you nauseous.  I also kept a lot of different options with me - opening my car console was hilarious.  Crackers, almonds, energy bars, candy, preggie pops.  But I know what you mean about eating out.  Have you checked out restaurants.com?  They have discounted gift certificates for local restaurants.  Like you can buy a $10 certificate for $2.

living - if you've been on b/c a long time it can be several months before your cycles settle out.  I remember feeling like I bled/cramped constantly after stopping the pill and when I had the IUD taken out.  I think it's worse if you have something like PCOS because your cycles are already wacky.  Go to see your ob/gyn no matter what though because it could be something else and you want to be safe!

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KrisKringleGingleBells
Message #1601 - 06/23/09 02:01 PM



Congratulations lucibelle!  I guess I'm pretty lucky because I haven't had any unusual food cravings or aversions.  With the exception of cutting out the foods/drinks that could be harmful to the baby, I eat like I've always eaten.  I do need to eat breakfast and a mid-morning snack now since I have a bit of a late lunch.  I used to just have coffee in the a.m. 

 

I've been having pain in my right hip.  I was worried because I fell a couple of weeks ago.  But, I had my regular check up this morning.  The doctor said the baby is probably just sitting on something like a nerve or muscle or throwing something out of place.  It's particularly uncomfortable when I drive.  Did anyone else experience this?

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lucibelle82
Message #1602 - 06/23/09 02:47 PM



Thanks, everybody for your suggestions on the food. I have been keeping a stash of snack foods at my desk, but maybe I need to shoot for a greater variety of them. The tricky thing is that I never want junk food anymore! It's always real food, an actual meal. I'm thinking that maybe keeping a variety of fruits and veggies and protein-filled things on hand will help. For example, today I brought hard boiled eggs for a mid-morning snack.

Anne, the way you described your cravings is exactly what I've been experiencing! It's not a desire for a specific food like before, it feels like if I don't eat it I just might die. Very hard to explain, but it feels quite compelling. And I never know ahead of time what it will be for! This week has been italian beef, but usually it's just a one-time craving for some particular food and the next day I don't have any interest in it anymore and the thought of it makes me feel ill. How can I plan for something I can't predict?

From what you all have heard, are cravings linked at all to nutritional needs? Like if I make sure I'm getting enough protein or vitamin whatever, will the cravings die down at all?

I'm sorry for so many questions about this. I just feel bad about all the money I've been spending on food.

[Virgil Showlion]

ElfQ1015
Message #1603 - 06/23/09 03:16 PM



A little OT, but I was reading a book and they speculate that the reason women often have aversions to certain foods is b/c of evolution.  Bitter often can mean poision in the natural world, so when you are PG your body refuses it cause it may potentially cause harm to the baby (not that spinach is bad, but your body doesn't really care, it's just bitter) and we get aversions to meat b/c before refrigeration it could carry a lot of harmful bacteria inside it, which can also harm a baby.

 

I thought that was really interesting.  We become hyper attuned b/c the baby doesn't want to be posioned, so our body works us up to avoid certain foods that in the past could have signaled harm for the fetus.

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KrisKringleGingleBells
Message #1604 - 06/23/09 03:19 PM

lucibelle, I wouldn't worry that you're deficient in nutrition and vitamins as long as you're taking a good pre-natal vitamin and eating a healthy mix of protein, fruits, veggies and whole grains.  In my case, cravings aren't bad.  I also have friends who had cravings the whole way through their pregnancy.  I think it's different for everyone.  Try not to feel bad about spending money on food.  If you are satisfied and full, so is your baby.  It's temporary.  We can all go on a diet and cut back our food spending once we have our babies!

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anne81
Message #1605 - 06/23/09 03:52 PM

kgb18 - there's a hormone called relaxin that you get when you are pregnant.  It makes your joints looser so it's pretty easy to injure yourself.  I've also had the baby sitting right under my right hipbone and it caused it to hurt when I drove.  So it's hard to say.  But I think if it doesn't improve you might want to get a referral to a physical therapist.  I'm sure it feels like overreacting but I wish that I had done it sooner when I was pregnant instead of assuming that all the aches and pains are normal.  Even if they are normal it doesn't mean that they can't be helped.

lucibelle - I'm not sure it's linked to deficiencies.  I'm pretty sure I wasn't cake deficient when I was pregnant.   Although it's funny.  I ate really healthy before I got pregnant and then all I wanted was white carbs (eggo waffles, cake, cookies, malt o meal).  Salads made me nauseous.  My friend who eats fast food all the time had cravings for salad and fruit while pregnant.  Don't worry about your baby though - if your diet is deficient they'll just take it from your stores.  So you may end up calcium deficient but the baby won't.

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Meg - Mommy to Averie
Message #1606 - 06/25/09 02:41 AM

Lucibelle, at least you're only wanting to eat regular meals.  Early on, I only wanted to eat snacks/side dishes - no real entrees.  One time, I sent DH to Arby's because I was DYING for mozzarella sticks and jalapeno poppers.  No sandwich, just the sides.  And I don't even like Arby's that much!!  When we made dinner, I wanted to eat salad and rolls and vegetables, but no meat.  I guess that was my vegetarian period .  Thankfully, now that I'm well into the 2nd trimester and approaching the third, things seemed to have evened out a lot and I'm eating a lot more normally (and healthy).  We've eaten out twice in the last 3 weeks so I think we're doing good.

In other news, we had a horrible scare this morning.  I have the anterior placenta so I don't feel a whole lot of movement anyway but ever since I started noticing the flutters on the inside about 5-6 weeks ago, they have been consistent at night and I always feel her.  Well, last night nothing, and this morning nothing.  We didn't have any soda or juice so I ate 4 Reese's pb cups and still nothing.  Went to the doctor in a panic for a heartbeat check and sure enough, she's doing just fine.  It looked like she had turned and her legs were even more behind the placenta so I wasn't feeling the kicks.  Long story short, she's doing great, strong heartbeat, strong little kicker.  I'm looking forward to her getting much bigger over the next few weeks so I start noticing her more. 

Fun pregnancy symptom (not really) - I seem to have developed what is sometimes called "sore crotch syndrome."  LOL.  It just feels sore right there.  A horrible dull ache that makes it painful to walk unless I walk with my feet far apart, like something is stuck up my rear end.  The technical name is pubic symphysis diastasis and it's apparently caused by the hormone relaxin that anne mentioned.  Either way, I hope it doesn't stick around for long!!

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MuttleynFelix
Message #1607 - 06/25/09 01:19 PM



I thought I was getting over the nausea, but it has been worse than ever this week.  I think part of my problem is that it is so hot and humid. I'm struggling to stay hydrated because when I am nausous water makes it worse. I'm not throwing up a whole lot and it is very inconsistant. 

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KrisKringleGingleBells
Message #1608 - 06/25/09 02:23 PM



Meg, I have an anterior placenta too.  Her movements are a lot stronger now, but in the beginning they were very light.  I usually feel her move in the morning when I'm lying in bed and at night when I settled down.  Sometimes I feel her when I've been sitting at my desk for awhile. A few weeks ago I had a similar experience to you.  I didn't feel her one night like usual.  I didn't feel her in the morning.  I didn't feel her all day.  I started to get panicky.  We called a family friends whose a doctor (and his wife's pregnant with their third).  He said don't panic.  She probably just turned around.  I told DH if I didn't feel her soon I was calling the doc.  Sure enough a couple of hours later she must have turned around, and I could feel her kicking away.  I was really scared for awhile though.

 

Muttley, I laughed when you mentioned hot and humid.  I'm always cold.  Everyone told me that I would have all of these hot flashes when I was pregnant, and that I would be miserable being pregnant in the summer.  So far I'm 6 months along, and I'm still freezing!  DH and I are constantly fighting over the air conditioning.  I turn it off, he turns it back on.  At work I go outside at lunch to warm up (it's been about 85 with some humidity here). So far I'm still waiting for the big warm up everyone keeps talking about.  

[Virgil Showlion]

MuttleynFelix
Message #1609 - 06/25/09 02:33 PM

kgb - Ha. Come visit me. It has been 95 with a heat index of 105+ all week.  Saturday is suppose to be almost 100. Plus it is beyond humid out. Plus I had to go work in the field for 30 minutes Tuesday afternoon. It looks like it is going to be 2 more months of this weather! Summer is the only time of year when weather is predictible in SW Missouri and the predictability stinks.  At least in the winter it is cold for a few days then decent for a few days and it just goes back and forth. Summer it is just HOT and this year it started a month earlier than usual.   

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Holly Smith
Message #1610 - 06/25/09 03:43 PM

I was constantly cold when I was pregnant.  I'm usually hot.

Some cravings can be signs of iron deficiency.  It's called pica- and it's usually associated with cravings for things that aren't food-like dirt.  But ice cubes is another one.

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anne81
Message #1611 - 06/25/09 03:53 PM

The technical name is pubic symphysis diastasis and it's apparently caused by the hormone relaxin that anne mentioned.  Either way, I hope it doesn't stick around for long!!

meg - I don't want to upset you but I had this too.  It started around 20 weeks.  Wearing a belly support belt will help.  Get a referral to a physical therapist who specializes in pregnant/just gave birth women.  My SPD only got worse until I gave birth even though I was seeing a PT towards the end.  I'm still in physical therapy 6 months after giving birth and it's only been a month since I haven't felt pain in my pubic bone.

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KrisKringleGingleBells
Message #1612 - 06/25/09 04:08 PM

The technical name is pubic symphysis diastasis and it's apparently caused by the hormone relaxin that anne mentioned. 

I looked this up.  The symptoms sound like what I've been having with my hip pain.  I have had some pain on the right side of my pubic bone too.  It's not awful, but it's uncomfortable.  If it gets worse, I'm definitely going to talk to my doctor about it.

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Meg - Mommy to Averie
Message #1613 - 06/26/09 05:21 PM

KGB, check this website out - www.plus-size-pregnancy.org/pubicpain.htm

I know the site is plus size pregnancy but it applies to everyone.  Someone on the Health & Fitness Pregnancy board showed it to me.  It talks some about how a lot of OBs think it's just regular pregnancy symptoms and you pretty much just deal with it.  BUT it can be treated by a chiropractor.  At the very bottom under Resources, it gives a website you can go to to find a chiro in your area that have been Webster technique certified (it's the technique used to turn breech babies) and can supposedly help with the problem.  I'm going to make an appointment as the last couple days, it has gotten to the point that I can barely walk without being in excruciating pain.  Last night, I rolled over in the middle of the night and must have woken myself up with a scream because it hurt so bad.  And yesterday at work, the elevator was broken so I had to hike up 3 flights of stairs!  I was in tears by the end of it.  I'm leaving for work soon and it better be fixed!   It sounds weird but I've taken to basically holding myself when I need to move around because it seems to make it not hurt as much. 

I hope you get some relief soon too.  I really don't think I can go another 4 months like this.  At this rate, I'll be in a wheelchair by the end!!

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KrisKringleGingleBells
Message #1614 - 06/26/09 06:40 PM

Thanks for the site Meg!  I'll check it out.  Keep us posted on how you're doing.  Let me know if the chiropractor helps.  Chiropractors sort of scare me, but I have a good massage therapist who I was thinking of calling.  So far the hip pain hasn't woken me out of sleep yet, but a few times leg cramps have.  I swear, there's not a part of your body that doesn't get all messed up when you're pregnant! 

[Virgil Showlion]

Wisconsin Beth
Message #1615 - 06/26/09 06:58 PM

I swear, there's not a part of your body that doesn't get all messed up when you're pregnant!

Ain't that the truth? 

I sat stupid in a training seminar in my DD's pregnancy and that tipped off my sore crotch.  Fortunately for me, it never got worse.  With this pregnancy, it's my butt that hurts.  But reading this, I realize it could be a lot worse! 

And Meg, thanks for the website.  I'm poking around there now. 

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anne81
Message #1616 - 06/26/09 08:50 PM

The having trouble walking up stairs and rolling over in the middle of the night definitely sounds like what I had.   It's the splitting the legs apart that hurts because both sides of the pelvis start floating independently.  So some tips: sit down to put on your pants and do not stand and split your legs apart.  Suck in your tummy and do a kegel when walking up stairs.  This engages all the muscles in the pelvic floor which are attached to your pubic bone and will help stabilize it.  At night place a pillow between your knees and wrap a belt or a scarf around your knees.  This will keep you from opening your legs when you roll over, which is terribly painful, as you experienced.  When getting out of bed roll over on your side, suck in your tummy, do a kegel and then get up.   Actually suck in your tummy and do a kegel when you do anything - getting out of a chair, into the shower, etc.  A good SI belt with the pregnancy support will help the pain but you want to place it correctly or it will feel worse.

It feels like bone pain but it's not actual bone pain - it's the pain of the cartilage in the front of the pubic bone and strain from all your muscles that are attached to it.

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sweetKT
Message #1617 - 06/29/09 04:25 PM



Good afternoon ladies!

Well, I had my 12-week dr. appt this week and everything is looking great! I heard the baby's heartbeat  and we did all the bloodwork. The only thing that has me mildly irritated is that I have already gained 8 lbs. The dr said that this was certainly fine and that most women don't gain weight because of morning sickeness. But because I don't have morning sickness, I ate normally. He said last time at this time I had already gained 15 lbs so I guess this is an improvement at least . And if I had to choose between gaining a little extra weight and morning sickness, I'll choose the weight!

It has been super hot here in Georgia. Over 100 heat index all weekend. When I went outside, it was to take my toddler to the pool. At least I am not super preggo this summer like I was when I had my first baby. Otherwise I would be miserable instead of mildly uncomfortable.

Man, I am chipper this morning! It's not like me to look on the bright side of things .

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KrisKringleGingleBells
Message #1618 - 06/29/09 06:43 PM



Glad to hear everything is going well Sweet! 

 

I had my glucose test this morning.  The stuff you have to drink wasn't as awful as I thought it might be.  (It's certainly a lot better than that wretched barium you have to drink for an upper GI!)  And I knew it was going to take over an hour, so I had a book with me.  The only problem I had was that after the nurse drew my blood and stuck the gauze and tape on my arm, I tried to put my arm back into my sweater sleeve, and I knocked the bandage off.  Blood started pouring out and running down my arm onto the floor.  The nurse was really nice about it.  I felt so bad.  Now I have to go home and try to clean blood out of my white sweater.

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MuttleynFelix
Message #1619 - 06/29/09 06:47 PM



SweetKT - Sounds like everything is going great for you.  I'll trade you half my nausea for half your weight gain.  I'm 12 weeks as well, but am still holding steady/down a pound or two over my starting weight. Today we went to our favorite mexican place for lunch and I got my usual and for the first time ever, I did not finish. I barely ate half of it. 

Yesterday I thought I was showing a little and I actually had a belly. So, today I did not put a belt on with my pants and oh no, the belly is still not big enough to hold up these pants. Oops. Good thing I don't have to go to a meeting today.

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boos_mom
Message #1620 - 07/01/09 07:24 AM



luci - congrats!  I just budgeted more for food, both during pregnancy and for the first couple of months after delivery in case you don't have the energy to make a lot of meals at home.  For snacks, I liked cashews and pistachios, apples and peanut butter, yogurt and granola, cheese and crackers, english muffins and peanut butter.  And I would get cravings for avocados and salmon. 

kgb & meg - I had the same condition with #2 and I wasn't a plus-size pregnancy.  I guess my joints loosened up after #1, and I had back pain early on.  Turning over in bed was very painful and my joints would crack.  Of course, in the 3rd trimester, it's hard to turn over period so I'd just slide over to the edge of the bed before swinging my legs over to slide/swoop out of bed.  I never did go see a chiropractor about it.  Probably because chiropractors scare me.  I did wear my belly band all the time though.  Hope the chiropractor works for you!

kt - glad things are going so great for you and baby!

I'm almost done with pumping.  Down to only 1 time a day and that is yielding only about 3-3.5 oz, so I think I should be able to eliminate that pumping session within a few days.  Hooray!  Now I'll have to see if I need to get new, smaller bras.  Hopefully not; wasn't big to begin with. 

[Virgil Showlion]

sweetKT
Message #1621 - 07/01/09 12:22 PM



Thanks for the well-wishes ladies! I'm 13 weeks today .

boos - good for you on the mission to reclaim your breasts . Actually, most of the women I know did go up a cup size so I am rooting for you!

kgb - yeah, that stuff is awful to take sometimes. Mine last time tasted like flat orange soda, which wasn't so bad. I actually failed my 1-hour test and had to take the 3-hr test (which I passed). My finger was pricked so much it throbbed for 3 days! Not as bad as blood running down my shirt though. Did you try club soda?

Meg - I hope you get some relief! I am scared of chiropractics because I heard once you go to one you have to keep going back to them (you become dependent). I'm not sure if this is truth or rumor but it was enough to make me tough it out. Then again I don't think I ever experienced the pain level you are describing so I'm not knocking you for trying it and I hope it works!

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KrisKringleGingleBells
Message #1622 - 07/01/09 01:16 PM



While I'm sorry there seem to be so many other people experiencing the hip/pubic bone pain, I'm glad to know it's not just me!  I have an appointment with a medical massage therapist tomorrow after work.   I've tried chiropractors for back problems in the past, but I'm just too freaked out to let someone really crack my back.  Plus, the massage place told me last fall that my muscles are so tight that anything a chiropractor aligns is just going to get pulled back out of place by my muscles anyway.

 

Boos - You're hoping to stay in a larger bra, and I'm praying I don't get any bigger! I was quite happy with what I had before (a nice full C cup).  I'm up a cup size and scared to death about what's going to happen over the next few months.  I'm not a tiny girl, but I'm not big either.  I'm afraid I'm going to look like Dolly Parton by the end of this!

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goddessofrock
Message #1623 - 07/01/09 03:20 PM



LADIES! I NEED YOUR HELP!

 

AJ is 6 months and eating cereal at lunchtime and dinner time in addition to his bottles.

 

I am feeding him before work, pumping 2x at work and once at night.

 

I would like to go to 1 pump during the day. I would free up some of my time...

 

My breaks are currently 10 (pump), 12:30 (lunch), 2:30 (pump)

 

I would like to switch it to 10 (go to the gym), 12:30 (pump), 2:30 (lunch)

 

If you have experience with going from 2 pumps a day to 1, PLEASE ADVISE!!

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sbcaligirl
Message #1624 - 07/01/09 03:58 PM

Kgb18:  I'm fuller-figured, typically D/DD (after a reduction) and I went up 4 sizes during pregnancy and another 1-2 when my milk came in.  I was only able to BF for 2-3 wks b/c of supply issues but as soon as I stopped, I went back down to my pre-preg size within a week or two.  It seemed so ironic to me that I had supply issues when I was so HUGE but oh well.  There is hope!  Most of my family members are also fuller figured and had very similar experiences.

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anne81
Message #1625 - 07/01/09 04:57 PM

kgb18 - I'm still breastfeeding at 6 months and my boobs went through several stages.  They got really large as my milk came in (I was already a D and went up several cup sizes) and then gradually came down until about 4 months and now they are larger than they were by a few cups but no where near as large as the beginning.  And yeah - the muscles will continue to pull your bones out of place.  It's freaky.

goddess - are you going to try to pump the same amount of milk while decreasing the number of times you pump?

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Former_Roomate_99
Message #1626 - 07/01/09 09:15 PM



, You're certainly within your rights to tell the chiropractor not to do "high velocity adjustments" (scary back cracking) on you.  There are other options.  Just don't assume what the chiropractor will do.  Ask and verify. 

 

, your supply will probably go down, but now that your kid is older, a little formula once in a while isn't going to hurt anything.  Take some time for yourself.  You deserve it.  And congratulations on making it to 6 months pumping.