Heard two new corporate-speak phrases today!!

[cubefarmer]

Heard these today:

1) You will need to process that in parallel.

2) That is a gating factor.

Have you heard these before?

[bobbysgirl]

Did you forget to define these phrases?

[Elizabeth]

Nope. never heard these. I hear a lot of sports references and their are a lot of senior management phrases that I hear all the time. I just can't remember them now. But I'll be on the lookout for these new ones.

[schildi]

I've heard both. The second one is very common at my work place, for years.

[Deleted]

Unless strings of curse words count, my office doesn't do a lot of corporate speak.

[workpublic]

;D ;D ;D

[CarolinaKat]

process that in parallel...

Around here that means using 2 identical product trains to increase capacity...

[Savoir Faire-Demogague in NJ]

A gating factor is a task in a series of interdependent tasks in a time line that has the ability to delay the entire project.
Used in project management.

Parellel process, is taken from IT and is a concept where hardware/software configuration architecture can process as large batch task by spinning off multiple sub-processes that handle separate components of the data flow, in separate independent processes.

[zibazinski]

As a former teacher, are there any other teachers out there who play the BINGO game at staff meetings? You know, the one where they use all those key phrases ad nauseum until someone says BINGO and we all laugh?

[schildi]

Apr 8, 2011 7:56:19 GMT -5 @sroo4 said:

Oh... those two have been on my buzzword bingo card for awhile... right next to 'low hanging fruit', 'synergy', and 'circle back around'.

You get double points if someone uses the phrase 'back of the envelope calculations'

LOL, with the exception of "synergy", this all sounds very familiar.

[zibazinski]

Plusses and Deltas because we can't say "minus" now because that has too negative a connotation.

[zibazinski]

[midjd]

I may have to start using "gating factor" instead of "your payment is 30 days late because of this #$*&@# state payroll software requiring 10 different people to sign off on a $5 expense"... it does sound nicer

[schildi]

I am ok at work - as long as I am not the gating factor.

[lisaa]

Yes, they have both been around for a very long time.

[illinicheme]

I haven't heard "gating factor." Around here, it's usually "#%)(@! Why are we always the ones on the critical path?"

The corporatespeak phrase I have the biggest love/hate relationship is "let's take that offline" - drives me nuts, but sometimes it's the only way to get people to shut up and actually let a meeting progress in a useful way.

[morrisr2d2]

The one I've started hearing more is "hard stop". As in "I'll be cutting out of this meeting early because I have a hard stop at 5 p.m."

[Tiny]

I've heard various renditions of: You will need to process that in parallel just about forever - but then I work in IT and we often have to have two separate systems (old and new) running 'parallel' so we can verify that the new will indeed work and match the numbers/whatever coming out of the old system.

I haven't heard this one yet... That is a gating factor we're still old school and have 'show stoppers'.

[cubefarmer]

I heard the "process that in parallel" when someone told the manager he needed approval for something and he needed to order supplies - same project - and he was told to process that in parallel meaning do it at the same time. One task didn't need to be made before the other.

Gating factor I heard when someone was trying to determine if they had the correct home office set up for working from home and he was told the location of where the internet came into the house was a gating factor as to whether he could use the company's special security box or not. If internet came into the house at the right spot you were okay. If it came into the house too far away from your work space you at to use another option. So it was like a requirement.

[Deleted]

Just be sure to document them on your TPS report.

[AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP]

Apr 8, 2011 8:15:39 GMT -5 Savoir Faire-Demogague in NJ said:

A gating factor is a task in a series of interdependent tasks in a time line that has the ability to delay the entire project.
Used in project management.

Parellel process, is taken from IT and is a concept where hardware/software configuration architecture can process as large batch task by spinning off multiple sub-processes that handle separate components of the data flow, in separate independent processes.

We used to call "gating factors" bottlenecks., and parellel process multi-tasking.

[Deleted]

I'm in a Master's of Communications program and I haven't heard either one of these phrases before.

[Elizabeth]

I am finding this thread highly entertaining. I agree with "delta" and "circle back." I hear those two ALL the time. Some people use these buzzwords so much I wonder if they even know what they are talking about.

[tskeeter]

Buzzword - verbiage used by someone attempting to disguise that they have absolutely no idea what they are talking about.