zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Jul 17, 2017 20:53:58 GMT -5
Isn't it uncomfortable going over there over and over again? She could mail the items or have the one kid that likes you drop them off.
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Rukh O'Rorke
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Post by Rukh O'Rorke on Jul 18, 2017 9:29:53 GMT -5
Isn't it uncomfortable going over there over and over again? She could mail the items or have the one kid that likes you drop them off. yeah - why the piecemeal on this exit? When you move out - you can either fit it all in a truck you own or borrow - or you rent a vehicle - you back into the driveway, and you fill it up with everything of yours and then you "move" that stuff to your new spot. How do you just keep leaving things there to pick up later? Couldn't these "small" item have fitted into a bag with the tomatoes and pasta you took? You really should have taken these gadgets of sentimental value and left the canned food. I mean really - to take food out the pantry and then leave these items is questionable judgement and makes you seem petty (taking food) and trying to prolong the end of the relations (leaving small but important-to-you items that you just have to go back for). It's pretty obvious that she ended this. Just get everything you want out of there and be done with it. I'd be pretty annoyed if I broke up with someone and it took them a month to get everything out of my house. And just because your mother tells you to do something petty - doesn't make it not petty - and doesn't mean you have to do it.
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Blonde Granny
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Post by Blonde Granny on Jul 18, 2017 9:35:51 GMT -5
I question why, if she was the one who ended the relationship that he still has a key to the house. If nothing else, changing the locks would have been the ideal step to take. Beer either has to be out or else by a certain date and if not, stuff would be sitting in boxes outside in the front yard.
And above all, there would be strict instructions that he is to leave my children alone.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jul 18, 2017 9:37:38 GMT -5
Isn't it uncomfortable going over there over and over again? She could mail the items or have the one kid that likes you drop them off. yeah - why the piecemeal on this exit? When you move out - you can either fit it all in a truck you own or borrow - or you rent a vehicle - you back into the driveway, and you fill it up with everything of yours and then you "move" that stuff to your new spot. How do you just keep leaving things there to pick up later? Couldn't these "small" item have fitted into a bag with the tomatoes and pasta you took? You really should have taken these gadgets of sentimental value and left the canned food. I mean really - to take food out the pantry and then leave these items is questionable judgement and makes you seem petty (taking food) and trying to prolong the end of the relations (leaving small but important-to-you items that you just have to go back for). It's pretty obvious that she ended this. Just get everything you want out of there and be done with it. I'd be pretty annoyed if I broke up with someone and it took them a month to get everything out of my house. And just because your mother tells you to do something petty - doesn't make it not petty - and doesn't mean you have to do it. I don't get this from a grown man at all. Me, I would have the locks changed on my place by now.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Jul 18, 2017 10:03:36 GMT -5
I think the stuff about the kids is a little out of line. He wasn't just in a relationship with the mother, he had one with the kids as well. Obviously he and at least one of the kids got attached. She seems to look up to him as a father-type figure, and since her own father can't be assed to be in her life, that works out. The girl is almost 18, so she can make her own choice as to whether or not she wants beergut in her life. As long as he isn't using her as an excuse to stay tuned in to her mother's life, I don't see why contact needs to be cut off.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 18, 2017 10:17:59 GMT -5
Well, both my exes still have stuff at my house 4 years and 13 years later and I packed 2.0 myself, so I can see if you've been together for years that you might forget items on the first or second pass through. My exes are long past just showing up for stuff, but if I spot something I know is theirs I toss it in the van for the next time I see them and if they ask about something I'll check if I can find it. There's a couple decades of accumulation here and it's easy to miss things.
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Rukh O'Rorke
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Post by Rukh O'Rorke on Jul 18, 2017 10:55:43 GMT -5
I think the stuff about the kids is a little out of line. He wasn't just in a relationship with the mother, he had one with the kids as well. Obviously he and at least one of the kids got attached. She seems to look up to him as a father-type figure, and since her own father can't be assed to be in her life, that works out. The girl is almost 18, so she can make her own choice as to whether or not she wants beergut in her life. As long as he isn't using her as an excuse to stay tuned in to her mother's life, I don't see why contact needs to be cut off. I agree that there is no need to write up the lifetime movie script as yet! But honestly - being close to the kids makes raiding the pantry even more incongruous. The one question that could tell the whole tale - imo - is - why did mom even know and/or feel free to comment on - canned tomatoes in the pantry??
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jul 18, 2017 12:20:14 GMT -5
I think the stuff about the kids is a little out of line. He wasn't just in a relationship with the mother, he had one with the kids as well. Obviously he and at least one of the kids got attached. She seems to look up to him as a father-type figure, and since her own father can't be assed to be in her life, that works out. The girl is almost 18, so she can make her own choice as to whether or not she wants beergut in her life. As long as he isn't using her as an excuse to stay tuned in to her mother's life, I don't see why contact needs to be cut off. I agree that there is no need to write up the lifetime movie script as yet! But honestly - being close to the kids makes raiding the pantry even more incongruous. The one question that could tell the whole tale - imo - is - why did mom even know and/or feel free to comment on - canned tomatoes in the pantry?? See my post 26 way back there when this first came up.
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beergut
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Post by beergut on Jul 18, 2017 15:23:32 GMT -5
Isn't it uncomfortable going over there over and over again? She could mail the items or have the one kid that likes you drop them off. yeah - why the piecemeal on this exit? When you move out - you can either fit it all in a truck you own or borrow - or you rent a vehicle - you back into the driveway, and you fill it up with everything of yours and then you "move" that stuff to your new spot. How do you just keep leaving things there to pick up later? Couldn't these "small" item have fitted into a bag with the tomatoes and pasta you took? If I was intentionally leaving items there, you would have a point. The reason they are still there is that they're small enough items that they're not the first thing you think of when you leave a place, but they are items that have enough of a sentimental value to me that I don't want her to keep them. If I had remembered these two items when I was there last, I would have grabbed them, but I was distracted by teaching the 17YO how to make pizza dough.
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beergut
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Post by beergut on Jul 18, 2017 15:30:04 GMT -5
I think the stuff about the kids is a little out of line. He wasn't just in a relationship with the mother, he had one with the kids as well. Obviously he and at least one of the kids got attached. She seems to look up to him as a father-type figure, and since her own father can't be assed to be in her life, that works out. The girl is almost 18, so she can make her own choice as to whether or not she wants beergut in her life. As long as he isn't using her as an excuse to stay tuned in to her mother's life, I don't see why contact needs to be cut off. I agree that there is no need to write up the lifetime movie script as yet! But honestly - being close to the kids makes raiding the pantry even more incongruous. The one question that could tell the whole tale - imo - is - why did mom even know and/or feel free to comment on - canned tomatoes in the pantry?? If I had thought the kids were ever going to use the tomatoes, I would have left them. The 19YO and the 17YO favor alfredo-style sauces more, though, and don't make tomato sauces. As for how my mother knew about the canned tomatoes, I'm sure I mentioned it when noting that her pantry was absent any canned tomatoes a few weeks ago.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Jul 18, 2017 15:45:58 GMT -5
Well, both my exes still have stuff at my house 4 years and 13 years later and I packed 2.0 myself, so I can see if you've been together for years that you might forget items on the first or second pass through. My exes are long past just showing up for stuff, but if I spot something I know is theirs I toss it in the van for the next time I see them and if they ask about something I'll check if I can find it. There's a couple decades of accumulation here and it's easy to miss things. You have children with your exes. You still see them.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Jul 18, 2017 16:07:38 GMT -5
beergut, just stop explaining yourself. Your responses make sense, but apparently nothing you say will be good enough for the peanut gallery.
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Jul 18, 2017 16:32:01 GMT -5
beergut , just stop explaining yourself. Your responses make sense, but apparently nothing you say will be good enough for the peanut gallery. Well.......did he ever tell us what happened? Until then - he should continue explaining.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Jul 19, 2017 6:41:30 GMT -5
😏
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