How many commitments do you have in a typical weekend?

[debthaven]

So, we have a super busy weekend, to my taste. We live in the western suburbs of Paris.

- Fri night, dinner invitation from a friend who lives in the east of Paris. It took 1h45 to get there, driving.
- Sat night, dinner invitation two blocks away. It took 5 min to get there, walking.
- Sunday, afternoon wedding in the east of Paris. We're planning to take the motorcycle, so 3/4h?

That is WAAAYYYY too much socializing / too many events for me. I generally NEVER accept 3 invitations in a weekend but the way things worked out, DH and I felt we couldn't do otherwise. (The wedding invite came in last, for DH's long-term employee's son, so we felt we couldn't say no.)

I generally divide weekends into 5 parts: Fri night / Sat day / Sat night / Sun day / Sun night. I don't want more than 2 outside commitments per weekend. And NO outside commitments on Sun night, although I'm happy to do a big dinner with my kids here at home. But I don't count that.

I don't count getting together with my (young adult) kids, either home or elsewhere, I'll always go the extra mile for them .

What about you?

ETA: I'm talking about a typical weekend, not a family wedding or other special event.

[Tennesseer]

I could have done (and did) what you are scheduled to do this weekend, Debthaven, when I was 20.  Could have done it (and did often)  when I was 30 and 40, and once in a while at even 50.  At 65, I have no desire to go out but one night a week and that's about it.

[debthaven]

Haha Tennesseer, that definitely plays into it. I'm 57 and DH is nearly 61, and it's just too much at this point.

DH claims it's not ... but then he felt sick during tonight's dinner and left early.

ETA: That's actually a good point ... DH tells me (nicely) that I'm a wimp whenever I say something is "too much". But then he (might) flake. Or fall asleep and snore VERY LOUDLY on somebody's couch.

I NEVER EVER flake, or fall asleep. But I'll definitely refuse or put off "excess" invitations if I get them first.

[The Walk of the Penguin Mich]

This is a busy weekend for us.  Thursday night, we have a standing date to get together with friends.  Last night, we had tickets to a show at Mount Baker Theatre.  Today, TD is volunteering at the range.  I met him out there earlier to get some practice in.  Tomorrow, we have tickets in Seattle, with dinner after.  So we will be out of here at 11, get home around 8.

We have about one weekend/month like this.

[debthaven]

Mich I have to admit, I saw that elsewhere. And to be honest, I wondered (although I LOVE the theater) why you'd have tix for something two days in a row.

As much as I love the theater, I wouldn't want to go two days in a row, I'd prefer to space it out.

[countrygirl2]

None, sometimes we go out for dinner, about it.

We don't do anything generally.

[debthaven]

None, sometimes we go out for dinner, about it.
We don't do anything generally.

There's probably a happy medium somewhere LOL.

[Pants]

I'm in the young kids stage, and we both work so weekends are jammed with housework, cooking, that kind of stuff. Saturday mornings we have swim lessons for the girls. At this point, since a social commitment means either hauling the kids with or hiring a sitter I will commit to 1/weekend. Usually none, though.

I now have swim class for me on Saturday mornings and we have a standing Sunday afternoon appointment with a babysitter so dH and I can get some house stuff done, work out, see a movie, whatever. But our sitters dad has alzheimer's so she only comes about 50% of the time, but since it's just to give us some flexibility that's fine by us.

[debthaven]

Mich I don't know about you but one weekend per month at that rhythm would be too much for me. I have marking / prep for school, and I know you have assignments.

This said, I find it easier in the spring / summer than in the fall / winter.

I have hellishly long work days and I need downtime on weekends. I'm already wondering how I'm going to make it through Monday, and I'm thinking that I really don't want this to happen again.

[debthaven]

Pants no small kids at home anymore here.

But I am actually envying you at being able to just stay home and not being expected to be in 3 million places during a weekend.

This is the first time this has happened in a while, but I hope this isn't a new trend. Because if it is, I may have to enter a convent, and I'm not even Catholic.

This level of socializing is hell for me.

[swamp]

Far too many. 

At a caetain point in winter: 

fri nite:  DD dance lesson.  
sat:  8:00 Zumba 
10:00 DS basketball 
11:45 DD skating
1-3. Kid birthday party and I go grocery shopping. 
Evening:  DH and I meet up with friends.  

Sun: 10:45 kids have Sunday school.  

Fall is soccer. 
march is extra skating practices for the show and a mini dance recital. 
May is dance recital. Both kids are in it. DS all 3 nights.  DD just one night. 

Summer: swim lessons, sports camps, summer camp, engineering camp. 

I also do do some volunteer stuff and check in on my parents.  And run a business. 

[debthaven]

OMG Swamp! OMG!

When my kids were younger I'd always prefer weekday/weeknight activities because then on the weekends we could be OFF. But I do realize you have to work with their schedules.

ETA: DH and I are both in a very high-quality amateur theater troupe. We've been doing it for five years. I took this year off (but DH didn't.) I really needed a break from the 2 nights / all day Sunday rehearsal schedule.

[busymom]

Now that the kids are out of school, my weekends are a lot quieter.  Except, now I'm trying to catch up on all of the stuff around the house that's been put off (for years!).  

Now, one big event on a weekend, and I'm DONE.  I blame it on age.  


Maybe it's time to impress on your DH that even HE can no longer handle everything he thinks he can.  It's like having a kid at mealtime when he loads up his plate, but can't finish it all.  

[Deleted]

Fixed:  Gym every day, church on Sundays, French class every other Saturday morning.  Today was a rare Saturday morning at home; typically something else comes up, maybe related to Toastmasters or church work.  Friday night once a month- church gathering at local pub ("God and Guinness").  Saturday night once a month, different week- church group goes out to dinner at local restaurant.  I do more of these things with DH gone because I enjoy the company.

Tomorrow I have the gym first thing in AM, church, a meeting there immediately following, and then I'm off to a local pub for a benefit event for Planned Parenthood.  I sponsored 3 kegs, may as well sample one.  Fortunately, in my denomination, most people would see no conflict between being a member of the church and supporting PP.

I do need time at home at the end of the day to just vegetate.  Fortunately, I almost always have that.  The church pub and dinner crowds tend to break up early.

[Deleted]

Try to limit to one event per weekend. We keep a shared calendar on our phones and the rule is we check with each other if something additional comes up on a weekend with something already planned.

[debthaven]

Maybe it's time to impress on your DH that even HE can no longer handle everything he thinks he can.

I agree Busy, that is indeed the issue. And I try, but it's very hard, especially since he's officially disabled. There are things he really can't do, so it's extremely difficult to tell him he can't do the things he actually can.

Night night for now.

AJ to me one commitment would be ideal, and I'm sure we could deal with a second, especially if one were local. But (as this weekend has proved) that there's no way I (and even WE) can handle 3 at this point.

[The Walk of the Penguin Mich]

Feb 25, 2017 19:47:42 GMT -5 debthaven said:

Mich I have to admit, I saw that elsewhere. And to be honest, I wondered (although I LOVE the theater) why you'd have tix for something two days in a row.

As much as I love the theater, I wouldn't want to go two days in a row, I'd prefer to space it out.

We have season tickets to the ballet, opera and the local theater.  Friday was International Guitar Night, tomorrow is the opera.  The ballet and opera are in Seattle, in the same facility.  Those are normally matinees because of the haul down and back.

Some weekends we have no shows, usually it is one.  Very occasionally it is two.

[Lizard Queen]

Me: taking care of mom's meds every morning and night includes weekends and holidays.  She's currently in a rehab place for a fractured hip, but it's extra boring for her there on the weekends, so I still visit nearly as much.

For DS, because transportation: bowling or soccer Saturday morning, religion class Sunday mornings, sometimes extra cub scout things.

Way more than I care to commit to already.  I'd theoretically like the kids in swim classes and indoor soccer, but yeah.  Or more precisely, no. . I don't like to be busy all of the time.  Very little socializing in there.  I should do more of that, but not every weekend.  I'm too introverted for that.

[The Walk of the Penguin Mich]

Feb 25, 2017 19:57:49 GMT -5 debthaven said:

Mich I don't know about you but one weekend per month at that rhythm would be too much for me. I have marking / prep for school, and I know you have assignments.

This said, I find it easier in the spring / summer than in the fall / winter.

I have hellishly long work days and I need downtime on weekends. I'm already wondering how I'm going to make it through Monday, and I'm thinking that I really don't want this to happen again.

We have had weekends where we do nothing.  Next weekend we have nothing planned, no tickets anywhere.  I suspect we will be going up to Vancouver to see TD's mom. 

[TheOtherMe]

I loved going out in my 20's, 30's and 40's.  65 now and I'd just like to be at home.  I take my dad to lunch at Dairy Queen on day every weekend.  Twice this weekend because my sister is sick. 

I don't do a lot of socializing since I've moved here.  I miss it.

[countrygirl2]

If I could see better at night I would drive to the city and go to plays and concerts that the

universities have there. Sometimes I can and sometimes I don't feel comfortable, so that has

limited us for a long time.  I started to buy season tickets and backed off.

When we go in the motorhome, many times DD and I take a taxi to and from venues if they

are late, especially in unfamiliar areas.

This weekend nothing, DH did say we would go out and eat but it was later and I didn't want

to, I also didn't want Chinese, they have the same stuff all the time. I was up till 4AM reading

a book, got up at 9. Finished Lethal yesterday by Sandra Brown, good book. started Celebration,

not so sure about it.

Just finished putting a zipper in a coat after I fixed dinner. That was a chore. Now I may start

on the PJ's I have cut out, brought 2 machines upstairs serger and heavy weight one for zipper.

I'm going to try and start working out more downstairs if I can, I sure need to.

Nothing going on here. It was bitterly cold here today with the wind.

[Miss Tequila]

Feb 25, 2017 20:45:36 GMT -5 countrygirl2 said:

. Finished Lethal yesterday by Sandra Brown, good book. started Celebration,

not so sure about it.

I love Sandra Brown!  I used to read all of the time.  I need to start finding time to do it again. 

[plugginaway22]

I am in total agreement Debt. Two events in a weekend is about max for me.  After working a busy 40 hour week, the weekends are therapy for me, and time to get everything back in order before the next week.  I'm already stressing about Spring, we have DDs wedding and events associated with that, as well as 2 other wedding weekends that are both out of state.

[whoisjohngalt]

Me 20 yrs ago:  I worked on avg 60-70 hrs/wk.  Out clubbing Fri night.  Work Sat morning.  Out Sat night - either another dance club or movies/dinner or something else.  Gym - 3x/wk.  Volunteering 2x/wk.  Concerts/symphonies - a few times a month.   Religious classes - weekly.  I was fine.  I did that for YEARS!  Oh and there were also tons "weekend trips" to NY or Ocean City or somewhere else. 

Me now:  If kids have more than 3-4 activities during the week - I need a break.  If we have more than one outing during the weekend - I need a break.   I need a break from people.  I need a break from "schedules".  I just need a break!

[muttleynfelix]

Church on Sundays. I typically am scheduled to work the nursery at church once a month.

The kids activities are during the week. I do grocery shopping/meal planning on the weekends, DH works on a project around the house.

If the weather is nice, I'll take the kids hiking and then to a park one afternoon. In the summer, we'll go fishing one evening. We try to not be set in stone, but still do fun stuff.

[giramomma]

It depends.

For basketball season, we have between 2-4 games a weekend between DS and DD1.

Now it's GS cookie time, so we've spent a fair amount of time selling cookies on the weekend.

We average 1 kid birthday party a month.

DH and DS are taking a big boy scout trip this summer. There's another activity that we have meetings for once a month on the weekends.

I've been pushing on studying for GREs on the weekends.

We end up with volunteer commitments through church..usually one hour a week or so.

I teach a little on the weekends. I used to do extra Saturday work in the spring, but I'm not doing that this year.

We'll have a nice little break in March. I've already dubbed the weekend of March 11 the weekend of nothingness.

Then it's baseball season.

[cronewitch]

I have none or close to none. This week I have a doctor appointment. March 13 an appointment to talk about money with the oral surgeon about implants. August teeth cleaning appointment. I will get implants this spring and then a crown sometime. I get invited to play cards about once a month. I am pretty much commitment free since I live alone and don't have children or pets. I go visit ISO for a week at a time once or twice a month. I expect this doctor appointment to require follow ups so may have too many commitments after.

[countrygirl2]

I made my PJ's tonight. The top is done, the bottoms need elastic yet and the hem at the bottom. The top is a bit

large but may fix it with a button at the top or something. Sad to say I made the bottoms big, the waist will have to

pull in a lot but these hips, yug.

And kitty is sitting here purring on my lap, so that was my big evening. 

[Rob Base 2.0]

I thought there were 10 of them? Doesn't everyone have 10?

Thou shalt Not Steal

Thou shall not covet thy Neighbor's Goods

etc........

[TheHaitian]

None - I work retail!