zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Jan 20, 2016 16:50:43 GMT -5
I don't find that person attractive at all. I think I'm more into the less commonly thought attractive features. He actually looks like my ex brother in law and my ex sister in law said sleeping with him was like sleeping with another woman. Ick. I never forgot that comment obviously.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Jan 20, 2016 16:52:04 GMT -5
Thank you for sharing honeysalt. It's appreciated.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Jan 20, 2016 16:54:34 GMT -5
Hubba hubba. If you passed this guy on the street, who could blame you for not noticing that softness of cheek? Almost anyone's mind would be elsewhere, no matter what team you think that you play for. What a stunner! He has cheeks??
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 20, 2016 16:55:13 GMT -5
I'm always thankful when honeysalt and rae share.
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on Jan 20, 2016 16:57:32 GMT -5
Dumb question but don't you think you would know a man you were out with wasn't really a man? I think it is easier for a feminine guy to look like a woman than for a woman to look lole a man. I look at Chaz Bono..he just looks like a butch lesbian Other photos here www.lgbtqnation.com/2015/10/handsome-transgender-model-takes-instagram-by-storm/ I don't think I would be able to guess if I passed him on the street. I think a lot of it might have to be with how young they are when they start hormones? And this man, Aydian Dowling, is pretty well-known. (On my phone, hopefully image posts)
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Jan 20, 2016 16:58:49 GMT -5
I'm always thankful when honeysalt and rae share. I agree. Im a staunch conservative so Im obviously less open to things. But having people i "know" share their stories humanizes an issue for me (does that make sense?). I used to be against gay marriage and then realized why should straight people be the only ones to suffer (lol.:...not really, I just realized as long as it doesn't impact me why do I care). So there is hope for everyone!
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haapai
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Post by haapai on Jan 20, 2016 17:01:47 GMT -5
Yes, he has a face, but you gotta raise your gaze. Kinda makes ya feel like a bit of a hypocrite, doesn't it?
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Jan 20, 2016 17:03:00 GMT -5
Yes, he has a face, but you gotta raise your gaze. Kinda makes ya feel like a bit of a hypocrite, doesn't it? Not at all...that's the beauty of being a republican :-p
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 20, 2016 17:04:33 GMT -5
honeysalt I think you are an example of what I was saying about not mutilating your body. You are what you are and didn't do any more to your body than medically necessary.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 20, 2016 17:25:30 GMT -5
So it's ok for some people to repair what they consider a 'defect'.
Can I ask seriously if you are anti all piercings and tattoos and circumcision? Is hormone replacement therapy ok?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 20, 2016 17:28:42 GMT -5
So it's ok for some people to repair what they consider a 'defect'. Can I ask seriously if you are anti all piercings and tattoos and circumcision? Is hormone replacement therapy ok? What exactly are you upset with me about?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 20, 2016 17:32:06 GMT -5
At this point I'm rying to understand just what you classify as 'mutilation'. It's a strong word that conveys serious judgment.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 20, 2016 17:32:56 GMT -5
Since you asked, I'm against all of those things if they disrupt the physical functioning of your body and 50% of the people that do it end up committing suicide.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 20, 2016 17:34:59 GMT -5
At this point I'm rying to understand just what you classify as 'mutilation'. It's a strong word that conveys serious judgment. Cutting off or restructuring healthy body parts is mutilation. I don't know that judgement is the right word for how I feel. It's more like what you feel for cutters. You don't hate them for doing it but you sure wish they wouldn't do that to themselves.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 20, 2016 17:41:24 GMT -5
Well my mutilated boobs think you should take a rest cause they don't need you to think about them at all.
mutilate/mutilation: deform, degrade in appearance, disfigure, mangle... I hear a lot of judgement there. As much as I hear in words like bizarre and lunacy.
I think it's perfectly ok to not understand, or not choose this, and not know what you would do in the situation. I thought Tequila did a nice job of showing how a person can be uncomfortable with something, not necessarily agreeing, but refrain from being disparaging.
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cronewitch
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Post by cronewitch on Jan 20, 2016 17:46:56 GMT -5
I always enjoy the ones who paint their toe nails. With their hairy feet and toes. Man feet. I worked with a man who had his girl friend paint his nails, she wanted to so he let her. He wore sandals and was in line to buy building permits for his construction company when he noticed his nails were painted. He was a manly man but she wanted to and he always let her do whatever she wanted. I wonder how many of these had a little daughter or granddaughter want to paint the nails.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 20, 2016 17:55:35 GMT -5
I've read that a percentage of children that identify as transgender will later change their mind. It's nice that: That's definitely a better option. A family who left our church a few years ago has a son in HS transitioning to being a female. (They left for unrelated reasons.) I often wonder how they're doing. OP if your friends are Christian, this may be a good resource: www.thereformationproject.org . I went to a recent conference in my area and was really impressed. I was focused more on gay Christians, which is still an area of contention in my denomination, but there were good resources for transgendered people, too- in fact, when I sent out my notes to people in my parish, one woman told me the site had been really useful to the family of her niece, who's transitioning.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 20, 2016 18:00:48 GMT -5
I was born with ambiguous genitalia, not a penis nor a vagina, something in between, caused by incomplete masculanization in utero. Fortunately, my parents had the good sense to wait until just before I hit puberty for me to have a medically necessary genital surgery. Yes, that was a blessing. I read (and you probably have too) studies of children who were born with ambiguous genitalia whose doctors/parents decided what gender they were and proceeded with surgery that would make them resemble that sex as closely as possible. Many grew up into confused, angry adults and some weren't even sure why.
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gregintenn
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Post by gregintenn on Jan 20, 2016 18:20:29 GMT -5
Actually, scientifically, it does not. Also, you are correct. I don't believe I called anyone anything other than calling the friend's husband a guy. I was born with ambiguous genitalia, not a penis nor a vagina, something in between, caused by incomplete masculanization in utero. Fortunately, my parents had the good sense to wait until just before I hit puberty for me to have a medically necessary genital surgery. Given your binary and genital based definition of sexuality, how would you classify me? Not trying to be snarky, it is just an opportunity for me to understand the thought process of someone whose experiences are so different from my own. Using my very elementary, no, almost non existent knowledge on the subject, I would consider you a genetic abnormality. I would also say, judging by your posts, I find you to be a very interesting, kind, and brave person for educating me on the subject, and not just calling me an insensitive dick like others here tend to do. Thank you for your replies and their very educating content.
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gregintenn
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Post by gregintenn on Jan 20, 2016 18:22:33 GMT -5
Well my mutilated boobs think you should take a rest cause they don't need you to think about them at all. mutilate/mutilation: deform, degrade in appearance, disfigure, mangle... I hear a lot of judgement there. As much as I hear in words like bizarre and lunacy. I think it's perfectly ok to not understand, or not choose this, and not know what you would do in the situation. I thought Tequila did a nice job of showing how a person can be uncomfortable with something, not necessarily agreeing, but refrain from being disparaging. Your posts in this thread show a lot of personal insecurity. I like you, oped. Like yourself for who you are and don't be so defensive.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 20, 2016 18:28:24 GMT -5
You've been gone a long time Greg. I'm sure you didn't realize that there are many people here who live with and love people who are and have dealt with these very real issues.
But then, I'd guess you also run in to many people in your regular life who are also. You just never know it, nor know what impact your words might have on them.
I'm guessing most of them aren't likely to confide when your immediate response is not to listen or consider, but to offer disparaging descriptions and pass judgement.
We are so lucky to have people here willing to share candidly. I respect them very much.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 20, 2016 18:31:18 GMT -5
Well my mutilated boobs think you should take a rest cause they don't need you to think about them at all. mutilate/mutilation: deform, degrade in appearance, disfigure, mangle... I hear a lot of judgement there. As much as I hear in words like bizarre and lunacy. I think it's perfectly ok to not understand, or not choose this, and not know what you would do in the situation. I thought Tequila did a nice job of showing how a person can be uncomfortable with something, not necessarily agreeing, but refrain from being disparaging. Your posts in this thread show a lot of personal insecurity. I like you, oped. Like yourself for who you are and don't be so defensive. I love myself. I'm not insecure at all. I think others can probably attest... I'd do well with a little more humility. But I'll be damned if I'm going to just casually accept the defamation and degradation of people I value, here and in the world. They might not need it, or even desire it of me, but I just can't abide letting people say things that disparage them like it was nothing and should just be tolerated.
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gregintenn
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Post by gregintenn on Jan 20, 2016 18:32:17 GMT -5
You've been gone a long time Greg. I'm sure you didn't realize that there are many people here who live with and love people who are and have dealt with these very real issues. But then, I'd guess you also run in to many people in your regular life who are also. You just never know it, nor know what impact your words might have on them. I'm guessing most of them aren't likely to confide when your immediate response is not to listen or consider, but to offer disparaging descriptions and pass judgement. We are so lucky to have people here willing to share candidly. I respect them very much. Someone who was born with ambiguous genitalia is very, very different from some odd guy who wakes up one day and decides to become a woman.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 20, 2016 18:34:11 GMT -5
And honeysalt is not the only person here who has had a spouse, a relative, a child, dealing with these issues.
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gregintenn
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Post by gregintenn on Jan 20, 2016 18:41:17 GMT -5
And honeysalt is not the only person here who has had a spouse, a relative, a child, dealing with these issues. I give....what disparaging remark did I make to honeysalt?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 20, 2016 18:42:30 GMT -5
Not to her. In general. Lunacy, bizarre, general dismissiveness....
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gregintenn
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Post by gregintenn on Jan 20, 2016 18:46:20 GMT -5
Not to her. In general. Lunacy, bizarre, general dismissiveness.... Two entirely different things. You know that.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 20, 2016 18:47:56 GMT -5
Not to her. In general. Lunacy, bizarre, general dismissiveness.... Two entirely different things. You know that. No. I do not.
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gregintenn
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Post by gregintenn on Jan 20, 2016 18:50:15 GMT -5
Two entirely different things. You know that. Know. I do not. I'll talk slowly then....A married guy decides on day he's a friggin woman. He has mental issues, not chromosomal issues. Honeysalt was born differently than you or me.
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Virgil Showlion
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Post by Virgil Showlion on Jan 20, 2016 19:15:56 GMT -5
Two entirely different things. You know that. No. I do not. Honeysalt was born with a rare genetic disorder. She was assigned a gender early in life, conformed to it, and has been steadfast in her conformance. She handles the condition privately, with discretion. The gentleman in the OP was born a man, presumably without any genetic disorder. He grew up male, took a wife, and established numerous close relationships as a man. Now well into his adulthood, he's succumbed to the delusion (or if you prefer a softer term, mental pathology) by which he considers himself "trapped in the wrong body". As other posters have pointed out, his condition is no different from adults who "identify" as children, able-bodied individuals who identify as disabled, whites who identify as blacks, persons who identify as animals, or any other condition in the body dysmorphia spectrum. Honeysalt has nothing in common with this man. The condition is different, the causes are different, and the reactions are different.
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