Muscleup
Junior Member
Joined: Jan 11, 2016 16:38:17 GMT -5
Posts: 170
|
Post by Muscleup on Jan 26, 2016 11:04:11 GMT -5
I do not understand why more people don't wish to share in becoming better people through the Swami.
I know many of you are there but unwilling to express your desire for the Swami. Maybe you will share with me.
Are those less fortunate souls afraid of confessing to the Swami? Have no fear. The Swami is a holy man and whatever you wish to share with the Swami will be held in complete confidence.
Trust the Swami.
|
|
Muscleup
Junior Member
Joined: Jan 11, 2016 16:38:17 GMT -5
Posts: 170
|
Post by Muscleup on Jan 26, 2016 11:09:04 GMT -5
Today's Spiritual Lesson:
Two unholy people were washing their clothes by the bank of a river. They did not believe in the Swami or his teachings. They thought they could live a life without belonging to the flock of the Swami. A huge river crocodile snuck up on them and grabbed the less fortunate person. The crocodile dragged him deep into the river and ate the unholy man.
The other man that survived on the bank of the river was shocked. He learned that you never know when something tragic will happen in your life and the teachings of the Swami confirm this to be true.
Remember, trust the Swami for you never know when you will be eaten by a crocodile.
|
|
NancysSummerSip
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 19, 2010 19:19:42 GMT -5
Posts: 36,382
Today's Mood: Full of piss and vinegar
Favorite Drink: Anything with ice
|
Post by NancysSummerSip on Jan 26, 2016 11:35:10 GMT -5
I think it's unholy that people were doing laundry in a river. What, no laundromat nearby? Their stinky clothes polluting a river? Sheesh, you mess with Mother Nature, it's no wonder she bites you in the butt - literally.
|
|
Virgil Showlion
Distinguished Associate
Moderator
[b]leones potest resistere[/b]
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 15:19:33 GMT -5
Posts: 27,448
|
Post by Virgil Showlion on Jan 26, 2016 12:12:26 GMT -5
Swami, I seek your wisdom.
I believe my wife has fallen in love with a crocodile. He is indeed a very handsome crocodile and my beloved has fallen under his sway.
What must I do to win her back, o Swami?
|
|
Muscleup
Junior Member
Joined: Jan 11, 2016 16:38:17 GMT -5
Posts: 170
|
Post by Muscleup on Jan 26, 2016 13:20:50 GMT -5
Swami, I seek your wisdom. I believe my wife has fallen in love with a crocodile. He is indeed a very handsome crocodile and my beloved has fallen under his sway. What must I do to win her back, o Swami? The Swami is overjoyed that you seek the spiritual wisdom of my teachings. I can help you.
First, it is impure for a mortal person to be in love with a crocodile or any animal. Although there are websites that promote this type of behavior, (the Swami has only heard of these websites and never encountered any), this is only practiced by a very few among us.
Your wife projects a desire for more physical strength in your relationship. She probably feels there is lack with you. Your wife, unfortunately, is perhaps expecting more from you in a physical sense. There is nothing wrong with this desire. However, you must being willing to meet her expectations. The question remains if you can fulfill the desires of a woman sorely in need of something that she isn't receiving at the present time.
Your solution is to start lifting weights and getting some muscle. The Swami has heard that women love men with Muscles.
|
|
Muscleup
Junior Member
Joined: Jan 11, 2016 16:38:17 GMT -5
Posts: 170
|
Post by Muscleup on Jan 26, 2016 13:36:13 GMT -5
I think it's unholy that people were doing laundry in a river. What, no laundromat nearby? Their stinky clothes polluting a river? Sheesh, you mess with Mother Nature, it's no wonder she bites you in the butt - literally.
Nancy, please tell the Swami what is perplexing you so I might be able to show you the light of healthy living and happiness. You sound so depressed and lonely. This is not good for your well being and health.
Trust in the Swami and you will be shown a new way of life.
|
|
NancysSummerSip
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 19, 2010 19:19:42 GMT -5
Posts: 36,382
Today's Mood: Full of piss and vinegar
Favorite Drink: Anything with ice
|
Post by NancysSummerSip on Jan 26, 2016 15:13:26 GMT -5
Confucius say "He who see light and think it is healthy and happy witness delusion. It is merely the happy and healthy light of the oncoming train."
|
|
Bluerobin
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 14:24:30 GMT -5
Posts: 17,345
Location: NEPA
|
Post by Bluerobin on Jan 26, 2016 15:34:01 GMT -5
Swami, I went to your temple and saw the light. Why is it only a 25 watt bulb?
|
|
Virgil Showlion
Distinguished Associate
Moderator
[b]leones potest resistere[/b]
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 15:19:33 GMT -5
Posts: 27,448
|
Post by Virgil Showlion on Jan 26, 2016 19:00:40 GMT -5
O Swami, I will heed your advice, muscle up, and confront my wife. I will show her that the strength of the Swami is greater than the strength of a crocodile. Whaleatakahanda thanks you, Shankaracharya.
|
|
toomuchreality
Senior Associate
Joined: Sept 3, 2011 10:28:25 GMT -5
Posts: 15,868
Favorite Drink: Sometimes I drink water... just to surprise my liver!
Member is Online
|
Post by toomuchreality on Jan 27, 2016 22:46:32 GMT -5
Swami, I went to your temple and saw the light. Why is it only a 25 watt bulb? Indeed. Your followers want to know! Why is it only a 25 watt bulb
|
|
toomuchreality
Senior Associate
Joined: Sept 3, 2011 10:28:25 GMT -5
Posts: 15,868
Favorite Drink: Sometimes I drink water... just to surprise my liver!
Member is Online
|
Post by toomuchreality on Jan 27, 2016 22:52:21 GMT -5
Dearest Swami- Are you One Toke Over The Line? -Just checkin' Have a delightful day!
|
|
cael
Junior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 9:12:36 GMT -5
Posts: 5,745
|
Post by cael on Jan 29, 2016 14:38:38 GMT -5
Swami's training academy:
|
|
Muscleup
Junior Member
Joined: Jan 11, 2016 16:38:17 GMT -5
Posts: 170
|
Post by Muscleup on Feb 3, 2016 14:45:38 GMT -5
Cael, I am not a false Swami. All Guru's are fake and try to be like your Swami but to no avail.
Do you miss the Swami?
|
|
Muscleup
Junior Member
Joined: Jan 11, 2016 16:38:17 GMT -5
Posts: 170
|
Post by Muscleup on Feb 3, 2016 14:49:45 GMT -5
Swami, I went to your temple and saw the light. Why is it only a 25 watt bulb? Oh, poor Bluerobin. Thank you for coming to the Temple and being a devout followers.
What appears to you as a dim light is only your ability to permit light in. In other words, you are blinded by the trivialities of the outside world and so being in the Temple doesn't permit you from seeing all light.
Become a follower of the Swami and follow in the goodness of the teachings of the Swami and after you will wee much better in the Temple of the Swami.
|
|
Muscleup
Junior Member
Joined: Jan 11, 2016 16:38:17 GMT -5
Posts: 170
|
Post by Muscleup on Feb 3, 2016 14:51:32 GMT -5
O Swami, I will heed your advice, muscle up, and confront my wife. I will show her that the strength of the Swami is greater than the strength of a crocodile. Whaleatakahanda thanks you, Shankaracharya. Who is this muscle up that you confuse with the Swami? The Swami is a deeply religious man and not easily confused with other people.
|
|
cael
Junior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 9:12:36 GMT -5
Posts: 5,745
|
Post by cael on Feb 3, 2016 15:06:53 GMT -5
Cael, I am not a false Swami. All Guru's are fake and try to be like your Swami but to no avail.
Do you miss the Swami? Of course I've missed you! ...with every shot so far!
|
|
mmhmm
Administrator
It's a great pity the right of free speech isn't based on the obligation to say something sensible.
Joined: Dec 25, 2010 18:13:34 GMT -5
Posts: 31,770
Today's Mood: Saddened by Events
Location: Memory Lane
Favorite Drink: Water
|
Post by mmhmm on Feb 3, 2016 15:12:53 GMT -5
Swami, I went to your temple and saw the light. Why is it only a 25 watt bulb? Oh, poor Bluerobin. Thank you for coming to the Temple and being a devout followers.
What appears to you as a dim light is only your ability to permit light in. In other words, you are blinded by the trivialities of the outside world and so being in the Temple doesn't permit you from seeing all light.
Become a follower of the Swami and follow in the goodness of the teachings of the Swami and after you will wee much better in the Temple of the Swami.
It would, most likely, be best if Bluerobin didn't wee in the temple. It's unsanitary.
|
|
Muscleup
Junior Member
Joined: Jan 11, 2016 16:38:17 GMT -5
Posts: 170
|
Post by Muscleup on Feb 3, 2016 15:16:22 GMT -5
mmhmm, thank yu for noticing the mistakes of your Swami. This just shows to my followers that, I too, am capable of making mistakes, especially those that don't effect life long decisions.
|
|
toomuchreality
Senior Associate
Joined: Sept 3, 2011 10:28:25 GMT -5
Posts: 15,868
Favorite Drink: Sometimes I drink water... just to surprise my liver!
Member is Online
|
Post by toomuchreality on Feb 9, 2016 19:23:42 GMT -5
mmhmm, thank yu for noticing the mistakes of your Swami. This just shows to my followers that, I too, am capable of making mistakes, especially those that don't effect life long decisions.I don't know about this. If Bluerobin were to wee in the temple, or some other place, it could have a MAJOR impact on the rest of his life! What you see as minor, may only be minor to you. Are you leading people astray? -Just sayin'. Have a delightful day! ☼
|
|
Tennesseer
Member Emeritus
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 21:58:42 GMT -5
Posts: 63,619
|
Post by Tennesseer on Feb 10, 2016 9:28:58 GMT -5
mmhmm, thank yu for noticing the mistakes of your Swami. This just shows to my followers that, I too, am capable of making mistakes, especially those that don't effect life long decisions. Affect. Affect.
|
|
wyouser
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 16:35:20 GMT -5
Posts: 12,126
|
Post by wyouser on Feb 11, 2016 12:00:27 GMT -5
Hey, from the frozen peaks of Wyoming's highest mountain tops, the Guru wants to know who this Swamiarayan was and what is the Shikshaptri he wrote on this date in 1826? Local Shoshoni and Arapaho folks want to know.
|
|