The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Aug 9, 2015 18:36:40 GMT -5
DD starts back to school in two week (aack!).
Watching her walk around the house yesterday, I realized she had a growth spurt over the summer.
"Sweetie" I said. "Please do me a favor and come here and stand straight". She promptly complied. "Ok now, please put your hands straight down by your sides". She did so.
Shit!!! She doesn't pass the school modestly code (which I, for the most part, agree with btw).
So, both genders have to have their shorts below the tips of the fingers (arms at their sides). She was about an inch short. In her longest shorts.
shit, Shit, SHIT!
It was hard enough finding her decent/modest shorts at the start of the summer before the bean sprouted.
So off to Kohls we run today. I pass straight through the tramp juniors section to the misses. Several clearance racks later we find maybe four pairs of shorts that may work. DD tries them on, she's ok with them but not thrilled.
So on to the wasteland of fashion known as the junior sections where we spend several minutes searching the racks for something where the amount of cloth used justifies the price. No luck.
DD looks at me in disgust and states "At this point Mom, I'm ready to head over to the boy's section".
BINGO!!! I was not going to suggest it because certain family members already accuse me of trying to project my own opinions onto my DD (isn't that what parents are supposed to do?) and steer her into being a tomboy. Hell, almost all of my T-shirts (and DD's for that matter) come from the dude's section - better quality, prices, and graphics!
So less than 10 minutes into the boys/mens section she finds 4 pairs of really cool shorts on clearance. One short, happy trip to the dressing room later and we have enough shorts to get her through this fall and hopefully next spring.
Few thing to note (nothing new, no surprises)
1. Men's clothing is generally cheaper and better constructed then women's clothing. The boys' shorts were on average $3 bucks a pair cheaper (and these were clearance prices). Not that it matters at this age, but none of these were styles that would be "out of fashion" in three years.
2. Sorry - but men's clothing has better design and graphics. A snarky "Spoiler Alert - I'm totally AWESOME!" T-shirt rocks over "Boy Bait" any day.
3. I find it totally ridiculous that you constantly see young women tugging at their clothing trying to get enough coverage. You never see guys doing that.
I know I've ranted about this before, but dammit I will do so again and send another letter to Kohl's HQ.
There has to be a massive business opportunity here. DD used the term "Gender fluid" (which I'm familiar with and understand). We really, IMHO, do need a gender neutral section for clothing.
Ok - off my soapbox. I just had the fact that shopping for clothing for DD is getting harder as she gets older.
Humph!
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Apple
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Post by Apple on Aug 9, 2015 18:47:06 GMT -5
It's not any better for work clothes. A lot of the guys wear Carhartts-- well made, thick material, lasts forever. The women's version is "fashion", even though they say work wear. Thin, not as well made, would never stand up to blue collar work. It's frustrating. Same thing for a lot of steel-toe boots. You want stuff that won't wear out quickly, you have to go to the men's section (which is fine, when you can find something that fits well... not always easy).
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ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ
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Post by ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ on Aug 9, 2015 18:53:00 GMT -5
I had 3 older brothers growing up (and me as the youngest & only girl).
I got some great hand-me-down clothes from my brothers - jeans, t-shirts, shorts, etc.
Even now I have some awesome denim shirts I bought in the men's section. Far better construction than any women's shirts or tops.
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Aug 9, 2015 18:53:20 GMT -5
Ok, as far as the school modesty code. I mentioned above that for the most part I agree with it.
Some parts are sexist, some aren't. The one I have issue with is the "no cleavage shall be visible at any time".
WTF?!? Oh HELL no. If DD is anything like her momma (and this is NOT a bragplaint) she will be "gifted" and carry high.
So my DD is supposed to wear fucking turtle necks in the May because dudes have dirty minds?
I had cleavage in the freaking 5th grade. DD is not that far "advanced" (Thank GOD!!! it was hell) but I still want her to be comfortable in her skin.
This is a hill I'm willing to die on and beware, anyone who wants to take me on in this issue better be ready for a death match!
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Jaguar
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Post by Jaguar on Aug 9, 2015 18:57:43 GMT -5
The best hand me downs that I got was from my nephew. He passed all his Lee jeans down to me and I had the coolest jeans that no one else had !
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Aug 9, 2015 18:59:39 GMT -5
Loop and the girls went shopping for school clothes today as well. Thank god I got to dodge that bullet. The clothing sections for teen girls makes me stabby. The low cut tops, and hooker clothes start in the section for roughly 6 year olds, and by the time you get to the teen section that seems to be the only thing available. I'd like to rant at stores too, but they stock what people buy. As long as every white trash jackass mom out there is fine sending their 10 year old to school in a baby doll top that says 'Jail Bait' across the front and 'Sexy' across the ass the stores will stock that stuff. When we stop buying it they'll stop carrying it. Good to have to you comment. I purposely do NOT put DH through this as it's really not fair, YNWIM?
That's why Kohl's is getting the letter, I wonder if they know why boys/mens sections are doing better than juniors.
They may "Think" people want what the designers are telling them, but the average joe on the street needs to tell them different.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Aug 9, 2015 19:06:55 GMT -5
I had 3 older brothers growing up (and me as the youngest & only girl).
I got some great hand-me-down clothes from my brothers - jeans, t-shirts, shorts, etc.
Even now I have some awesome denim shirts I bought in the men's section. Far better construction than any women's shirts or tops. And the same shirts in ladies dept cost more!
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Aug 9, 2015 19:11:47 GMT -5
I agree. Shopping for my DD makes me stabby. She's 7. She's about the size of a 12 year old. It's so hard to find clothes that don't make her look like a hoochie mama.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Aug 9, 2015 19:17:37 GMT -5
I agree. Shopping for my DD makes me stabby. She's 7. She's about the size of a 12 year old. It's so hard to find clothes that don't make her look like a hoochie mama. Now that's funny. So glad I had a boy.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Aug 9, 2015 19:24:03 GMT -5
We went shopping and got some really cute stuff. I love shopping. And the girls are not walking out of my house looking like hookers. I'm not having it. If you want to just send me your girls and some cash, I'll send them back with modest stylish clothes at a decent price. I'm too cheap to pay full retail.
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flamingo
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Post by flamingo on Aug 9, 2015 19:26:09 GMT -5
I am extra tall and always have been (I'm now 6'0-whcih I hit at 14). After about the age of 12, I started shopping for jeans in the boys/young mens section. It was embarrassing to me at the time, in that I thought everyone in the men's section was staring/giving me weird looks like I didn't know where the girl clothes were. However, those jeans lasted me for what seemed like ever! A pair I bought freshman year of high school made it through college and law school with me. Now, when trying to find jeans, the length isn't so much the problem (they make longer jeans for women now), but finding ones that don't flash my a$$ whenever I move is the problem. And, finding ones that don't cost over $100!!
I feel for you all who have young daughters. Shopping anytime, but especially back-to-school time, sounds like hell.
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Shooby
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Post by Shooby on Aug 9, 2015 19:43:12 GMT -5
I don't know. I think there are a lot of very cute and tasteful or modest girls' clothing. I just took DD who is 13. SHe is now 5'7" and with hair and makeup looks like she is 16! Fortunately she doesn't want to look 16 and she really only wears makeup to special events like dances. She got some really cute dresses and jeans and tops at Hollister, American Eagle, Rue 21, etc. She knows the school dress code. Yeah, some things have spaghetti straps or the skirts are short, etc. It is very easy to make adjustments to fit the school code by properly layering. She can wear spaghetti straps if she is wearing a shrug over it or something else. For short skirts, she can yoga pants under them, etc. There are a lot of ways you can layer the look and it is fine.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Aug 9, 2015 19:52:11 GMT -5
We recently got Ross stores here. We decided to check it out Friday night. It was fabulous! Decent clothes at low prices and the girls got some cute stuff. We didn't get everything there, but we did get a bunch of stuff.
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Mardi Gras Audrey
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Post by Mardi Gras Audrey on Aug 9, 2015 21:45:25 GMT -5
I totally hear you... I couldn't believe the "low rise jean" fad a few years ago (Are those still in?). It was ridiculous. Low rise DO NOT look good on most people. You would think that they would know that a size 14 and low rise don't go together but for years, that seemed to be all that was available. I found a few Levis that weren't low rise and have coveted them since.... I dread the day when they wear out...
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Aug 10, 2015 7:12:36 GMT -5
Yup, the muffin top look isn't a good one at any age.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Aug 10, 2015 8:40:01 GMT -5
I am extra tall and always have been (I'm now 6'0-whcih I hit at 14). After about the age of 12, I started shopping for jeans in the boys/young mens section. It was embarrassing to me at the time, in that I thought everyone in the men's section was staring/giving me weird looks like I didn't know where the girl clothes were. However, those jeans lasted me for what seemed like ever! A pair I bought freshman year of high school made it through college and law school with me. Now, when trying to find jeans, the length isn't so much the problem (they make longer jeans for women now), but finding ones that don't flash my a$$ whenever I move is the problem. And, finding ones that don't cost over $100!! I feel for you all who have young daughters. Shopping anytime, but especially back-to-school time, sounds like hell.It is. I took a 7 year old girl and a 5.5 year old boy (who's taller and 10 lbs heavier) to Kohl's yesterday. We ended up with a crapton of Disney princess/descendents shit for DD. DS is sweatpants and tshirts, so much easier. I even tried to measure them so I'd know sizes in advance. That failed epically. I did learn that both kids grew over an inch in the 2 months since I last measured them.
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Aug 10, 2015 8:43:22 GMT -5
I know some of you are in more temperate climates or climates where the schools have air conditioning.
We're in the Chicago burbs. When most of the schools were built, school started after labor day and ended around the end of May. The number of days where air conditioning was needed did not justify the cost of installing it.
Fast forward to many years later to - longer school years, climate change, etc and retrofitting those buildings is prohibitively expensive. Still no air conditioning but the kids are in school from mid august to mid june depending on how many weather days there are (and there are more and more of them every year).
That and the fluctuating weather means DD had several days last year where the temp was in the mid to upper 80's. So the boys and flat chested girls got to wear V-necks and have button downs open two-three buttons but DD has to have all but the top button closed?
Like I said, oh.hell.no. Fortunately no one made an issue of it, but (especially on the hot days) if they did I'd be all over it in an instant.
Truth be told I'm still not ok with different standards based on how you're built. If you said no scoop necks for anyone, then fine. Only top button unbuttoned, then fine.
The dress code is very sexist. DD is pretty modest but has a right to be comfortable. There aren't many issues I'd go head to head with the administration on, but a sexist dress code that forces DD to be uncomfortable is one of them.
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musicjenny
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Post by musicjenny on Aug 10, 2015 8:44:11 GMT -5
I ended up buying jeans and khakis at the thrift shop, cutting, and hemming them to a modest length for my girls. Their school says two inches above the knee. I also found the more sporty-type brands (like Columbia) tend to make long enough shorts. ETA: The school says no v necks for anyone regardless of gender, only round neck or collars.
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imanangel
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Post by imanangel on Aug 10, 2015 9:19:19 GMT -5
Ok, as far as the school modesty code. I mentioned above that for the most part I agree with it.
Some parts are sexist, some aren't. The one I have issue with is the "no cleavage shall be visible at any time".
WTF?!? Oh HELL no. If DD is anything like her momma (and this is NOT a bragplaint) she will be "gifted" and carry high.
So my DD is supposed to wear fucking turtle necks in the May because dudes have dirty minds?
I had cleavage in the freaking 5th grade. DD is not that far "advanced" (Thank GOD!!! it was hell) but I still want her to be comfortable in her skin.
This is a hill I'm willing to die on and beware, anyone who wants to take me on in this issue better be ready for a death match!
We have this problem with my daughter. My daughter is itty bitty with 32D boobs. We have had a lot of problems with teachers telling her that her breast cause too much of a distraction. IF she wears a v-neck, I always buy her a cami to go under it to help cover, but she was even told that the cami caused boys to look because they were drawn to the line. She was told that because she was so itty bitty with big boobs, boys couldn't help but look down her shirt at them. It seriously pisses me off. I am not going to make my daughter wear a turtleneck or a burka just because she has big boobs.
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imanangel
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Post by imanangel on Aug 10, 2015 9:32:29 GMT -5
Perhaps the teachers need to spend their time teaching the boys not to ogle. (although a certain cynical part of me wonders if it's the boys that are distracted or if the teachers and staff are) She honestly can't win so this mama bear has been to the school too many times to count. We did buy her a scoop neck t-shirt that didn't show her cleavage at all. She was told to go to the nurse to change it because the picture showed a girl holding up a peace sign. The teacher said that because the peace sign laid across her breast....you guessed it, it distracted the boys and sent them the message that they could touch her breast. I nearly flipped my shit when she came home and told me that. Needless to say, the teacher and I had a "coming to Jesus" meeting. I told her that she wasn't to EVER say something like that to my daughter again. The teacher told me that she was trying to protect my daughter because teenage boys couldn't control their hormones. I told her that not only did she just insult my daughter, but she insulted my teenage boys as well. It got ugly.
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Aug 10, 2015 9:34:04 GMT -5
Warning: they're beginning to make boy's clothing out of flimsy material, too.
Here's my rant: DS needed a new pair of jeans, & he DOES like Levi's, so I let him pick the "shade of denim" that he wanted (denim comes in so many shades of blue now it's CRAZY). Anyway, I get the jeans home to wash, and the fabric is REALLY thin. I mean, this is supposed to be denim, right? It's about 1/2 the thickness of the usual denim material I buy, & the jeans are all wrinkled coming out of the dryer. Since Levi's has increased their full price to $50 per pair of jeans, they'd better be using the same quality denim we're used to seeing.
BTW, DD & I occasionally shop for t-shirts with slogans in the Men's department, because we don't like the fitted t's that they sell for girls now. When it's hot & humid out, I don't need to be wearing a shirt that "clings" before I even start to perspire.
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grumpyhermit
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Post by grumpyhermit on Aug 10, 2015 9:39:14 GMT -5
I have an ongoing battle with most women's clothing, and I have hated clothes shopping since I was a kid.
Mostly I have issue with shirt length. For the love of all that is holy, make a women's shirt that I can TUCK IN. It drives me insane. I want to be able to move my arm freely without exposing half of my stomach.
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Aug 10, 2015 9:39:52 GMT -5
Perhaps the teachers need to spend their time teaching the boys not to ogle. (although a certain cynical part of me wonders if it's the boys that are distracted or if the teachers and staff are) She honestly can't win so this mama bear has been to the school too many times to count. We did buy her a scoop neck t-shirt that didn't show her cleavage at all. She was told to go to the nurse to change it because the picture showed a girl holding up a peace sign. The teacher said that because the peace sign laid across her breast....you guessed it, it distracted the boys and sent them the message that they could touch her breast. I nearly flipped my shit when she came home and told me that. Needless to say, the teacher and I had a "coming to Jesus" meeting. I told her that she wasn't to EVER say something like that to my daughter again. The teacher told me that she was trying to protect my daughter because teenage boys couldn't control their hormones. I told her that not only did she just insult my daughter, but she insulted my teenage boys as well. It got ugly. I admire your restraint since you obviously weren't jailed. I would have gone totally medieval all over anyone who had that kind of backwards, sexist, one sided attitude about respect and the genders around my daughter. I was in a full C cup by the 8th grade. We had school uniforms so dress code wasn't much of an issue. Same thing in HS (all girls school, which I was grateful for even back then). Believe me, I wish that was an option for DD.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Aug 10, 2015 9:41:01 GMT -5
I'm not a big fan of fitted tees either busy. I carry most of my excess weight in the belly and fitted tees are NOT a good look.
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Aug 10, 2015 9:41:23 GMT -5
I took advantage of the tax-free shopping days this weekend for myself. I hate to shop, but did need some things. I like longer shorts as well - even if I had a hootchie mama heinie, I would not do the short shorts. I had trouble finding tailored casual shirts. All I could find was these huge, blousy things with insane prints or embellishments on them. They look like blue-hair-tourist-go-to-early-bird-dinner kinds of outfits.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Aug 10, 2015 9:41:28 GMT -5
Perhaps the teachers need to spend their time teaching the boys not to ogle. (although a certain cynical part of me wonders if it's the boys that are distracted or if the teachers and staff are) She honestly can't win so this mama bear has been to the school too many times to count. We did buy her a scoop neck t-shirt that didn't show her cleavage at all. She was told to go to the nurse to change it because the picture showed a girl holding up a peace sign. The teacher said that because the peace sign laid across her breast....you guessed it, it distracted the boys and sent them the message that they could touch her breast. I nearly flipped my shit when she came home and told me that. Needless to say, the teacher and I had a "coming to Jesus" meeting. I told her that she wasn't to EVER say something like that to my daughter again. The teacher told me that she was trying to protect my daughter because teenage boys couldn't control their hormones. I told her that not only did she just insult my daughter, but she insulted my teenage boys as well. It got ugly. Good for you. I think some of these teachers really think that parents aren't going to say anything and will just accept "it's for her own good" crap when they get out of line. I had an issue with an assistant principal and had a similar meeting. She ended up calling for help and I told her don't even look at my kid again or she would deal with me.
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Aug 10, 2015 9:43:17 GMT -5
Warning: they're beginning to make boy's clothing out of flimsy material, too.
Here's my rant: DS needed a new pair of jeans, & he DOES like Levi's, so I let him pick the "shade of denim" that he wanted (denim comes in so many shades of blue now it's CRAZY). Anyway, I get the jeans home to wash, and the fabric is REALLY thin. I mean, this is supposed to be denim, right? It's about 1/2 the thickness of the usual denim material I buy, & the jeans are all wrinkled coming out of the dryer. Since Levi's has increased their full price to $50 per pair of jeans, they'd better be using the same quality denim we're used to seeing.
BTW, DD & I occasionally shop for t-shirts with slogans in the Men's department, because we don't like the fitted t's that they sell for girls now. When it's hot & humid out, I don't need to be wearing a shirt that "clings" before I even start to perspire. DD started doing this when she was around 8 and realized there were no Star Wars, Avengers, or snarky saying shirts in the girls section. I've been doing this since HS. I do have a few women's t-shirts. They last, on average, maybe 2-3 years before getting too thin or piling up. I have mens t-shits that are a little thin, but over 20 years old and no piling.
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Aug 10, 2015 9:45:09 GMT -5
I took advantage of the tax-free shopping days this weekend for myself. I hate to shop, but did need some things. I like longer shorts as well - even if I had a hootchie mama heinie, I would not do the short shorts. I had trouble finding tailored casual shirts. All I could find was these huge, blousy things with insane prints or embellishments on them. They look like blue-hair-tourist-go-to-early-bird-dinner kinds of outfits. Van Heusen has nice tailored button ups. They do women's as well as men's clothing. I think they would look good on your frame.
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Aug 10, 2015 9:54:34 GMT -5
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Aug 10, 2015 9:55:38 GMT -5
I've not seen Haggar for women anywhere. I don't wear men's clothes - they do not fit correctly. Well, sometimes, the jeans do, but nothing else does. Funny story from this weekend. I bought new bras - six of them, all the same kind, just different colors. Because after a few years, you really do have to replace bras - they stretch, your size changes, the underwire (if present) no longer does its job, etc. This one style, a Vanity Fair, is just wonderful! When I explained my (very sound) logic to DH, he could not understand why I just did not wear bras until they wore out. "I wear my underwear until it wears out," he said. "You mean, you wear it until your junk leaves the trunk?" I asked. "Pretty much," he replied. Can't say as I've inspected too closely, but now I may need to do that - his underwear, that is.
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