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Post by Deleted on Nov 12, 2014 13:51:33 GMT -5
... The goal should be to give students the tools they need in life. ... The is in the details of that statement. Every student will need to know how to add, subtract, multiple, and divide when they become an adult. Algebra? Certainly a lot will benefit. Advanced Calculus? I don't know it and have never needed it. Knowledge of what areas of human sexuality is the minimum that students will need as they become adults? A teacher comfortable with human sexuality can easily teach sexual variety in a neutral way. "Okay class. Let's start by talking about ice cream. Here is a list of favorite flavors: bassettsicecream.com/p-51-List-Flavors-in-Order-of-Popularity. Most popular is Vanilla and Chocolate. But if you look down the list, you will see many different varieties. Look down the list and find Macadamia Nut. And at the bottom of the list is Pomegranate Blueberry Chunk. Now, I will admit that neither of those flavors are ones that I am going to eat. But there is certainly nothing wrong with those who do find those flavors to be tasty. Human sexuality is kind of like ice cream in that way. Most people ..." And the million dollar problem there is that not all parents want their kids taught anything goes. This discussion has made me wonder what is said about homosexual sex. Or transgendered. Once you get past biology it gets interesting.
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Peace Of Mind
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Nov 12, 2014 13:52:00 GMT -5
My mom taught me about sex in a biological way when I was about 11/12? after a girl told me where babies came out of. I was sure that was not physically possible and it was the stomach. Boy was I wrong. School taught us about sex and hygiene in middle school. So boring and not very helpful since I knew what little they taught already and it was more informative than what mom explained but still left me with many questions because I couldn't figure out why people were doing it so young when it didn't look all that awesome to me and very mechanical. But it was informative and helped me get to the next step. Now enter my friends who were sexually active way earlier than me. Detailed and hilarious sex education - priceless although shocking! Even with a job I always learned quicker "hands on". Yammering crap at me isn't as informative as hands (etc.) on. It's the same with sex. I learned way quicker and way better by doing but I had the tools to know how not to get pregnant and that names of things weren't literal. How embarrassing that would have been! But the most helpful was from my friends and NOBODY ever told me about birth control pills except my friends. If you want to teach your kids a little about kink I recommend Nip Tuck. That show was very interesting at times.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Nov 12, 2014 13:59:59 GMT -5
Transgerdism wasn't a topic I had covered in school until I took psychology/sociology in high school.
It was not taught in any of the sex ed classes I had. I can't remember for sure if homosexuality was addressed.
I do remember anal and oral being addressed and some parents having a cow over it. I didn't get the hysteria.
Both can transmit STDs and there is A LOT of pressure on teen girls to do things that aren't vaginal sex in compensation. You should be aware that you may be asked to do things and what those things are.
My HS boyfriend tried that line on me and I wasn't stupid enough to fall for it.
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on Nov 12, 2014 14:04:05 GMT -5
... And the million dollar problem there is that not all parents want their kids taught anything goes. ... I don't really care what parents want. There are private schools and home schooling is an option for them (as well as there should be an opt out choice if in public schools). Public schools need to teach what the public determines their youthful fellow citizens need to be taught. And nothing precludes parents from teaching their children what they wish them to learn as well. But ultimately parents need to sing:
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Post by ArchietheDragon on Nov 12, 2014 14:07:05 GMT -5
I do remember anal and oral being addressed and some parents having a cow over it.
maybe he didn't pay enough attention in sex ed, but even in the event that a consenting adult has relations with a cow, that is not sexually possible.
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Tiny
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Post by Tiny on Nov 12, 2014 14:19:14 GMT -5
LOL! Sex ed isn't suppose to be teaching kids how to have sex! That's what the back seat of cars (and other interesting places) and the Kama Sutra is for... or,wait, does a sex ed course in HS actually talk about the various positions that give the greatest amount of pleasure? Maybe I'm out of touch...
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Nov 12, 2014 14:19:27 GMT -5
Odds are your kid has already seen alot of images/representations of BDSM - on TV, in Books, in Movies... (Pulp fiction comes to mind) We have one TV in the house and watch shows together. Adult channels are blocked (and always have been). I don't have any BDSM books and either DH or I vet what is checked out from the library. DH also has nannyware on her computer and checks the logs every now and then (and DD is aware of this). The kid has no desire to see or read any of that stuff yet. If DH or I have any doubt as to the content of a movie she wants to see (like the Hunger games) we watch it first (yes even in the theatre). We've done this so far with the Avengers, Hunger Games, and the Star Trek into Darkness. Could she have gotten something from her friends? Maybe - but from what I know of her friends I doubt it. They are not in a hurry to grow up (DD just turned 12). Most of them don't have older siblings so I think maybe that helps. I can't imagine some of the stuff parents let their kids watch/play/read. It's different when they are truly in their teens, but 10-13yo'd kids, really?
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weltschmerz
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Post by weltschmerz on Nov 12, 2014 14:29:47 GMT -5
Odds are your kid has already seen alot of images/representations of BDSM - on TV, in Books, in Movies... (Pulp fiction comes to mind) We have one TV in the house and watch shows together. Adult channels are blocked (and always have been). I don't have any BDSM books and either DH or I vet what is checked out from the library. DH also has nannyware on her computer and checks the logs every now and then (and DD is aware of this). The kid has no desire to see or read any of that stuff yet. If DH or I have any doubt as to the content of a movie she wants to see (like the Hunger games) we watch it first (yes even in the theatre). We've done this so far with the Avengers, Hunger Games, and the Star Trek into Darkness. Could she have gotten something from her friends? Maybe - but from what I know of her friends I doubt it. They are not in a hurry to grow up (DD just turned 12). Most of them don't have older siblings so I think maybe that helps. I can't imagine some of the stuff parents let their kids watch/play/read. It's different when they are truly in their teens, but 10-13yo'd kids, really? So, when are you going to let her watch some racier material? When she's 18? 30?
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weltschmerz
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Post by weltschmerz on Nov 12, 2014 14:38:29 GMT -5
We have one TV in the house and watch shows together. Adult channels are blocked (and always have been). I don't have any BDSM books and either DH or I vet what is checked out from the library. DH also has nannyware on her computer and checks the logs every now and then (and DD is aware of this). The kid has no desire to see or read any of that stuff yet. If DH or I have any doubt as to the content of a movie she wants to see (like the Hunger games) we watch it first (yes even in the theatre). We've done this so far with the Avengers, Hunger Games, and the Star Trek into Darkness. Could she have gotten something from her friends? Maybe - but from what I know of her friends I doubt it. They are not in a hurry to grow up (DD just turned 12). Most of them don't have older siblings so I think maybe that helps. I can't imagine some of the stuff parents let their kids watch/play/read. It's different when they are truly in their teens, but 10-13yo'd kids, really? I don't I don't think our 11 year old knows things in that detail either.
I will say that when we were in Pompei we were looking at a house there, and she started cracking up laughing. I asked her what she was laughing at, so she points and says "that gladiator isn't wearing any underwear!" And sure enough, there was a painting on the wall of a very well endowed gladiator with no underwear on. VERY well endowed. So...I hope she's not warped for life or something. I'd be more worried about unrealistic expectations in the future.
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ArchietheDragon
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Post by ArchietheDragon on Nov 12, 2014 14:39:04 GMT -5
I don't I don't think our 11 year old knows things in that detail either.
I will say that when we were in Pompei we were looking at a house there, and she started cracking up laughing. I asked her what she was laughing at, so she points and says "that gladiator isn't wearing any underwear!" And sure enough, there was a painting on the wall of a very well endowed gladiator with no underwear on. VERY well endowed. So...I hope she's not warped for life or something. I'd be more worried about unrealistic expectations in the future. Women tell me that they don't actually like big ones.
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Nov 12, 2014 14:40:33 GMT -5
We have one TV in the house and watch shows together. Adult channels are blocked (and always have been). I don't have any BDSM books and either DH or I vet what is checked out from the library. DH also has nannyware on her computer and checks the logs every now and then (and DD is aware of this). The kid has no desire to see or read any of that stuff yet. If DH or I have any doubt as to the content of a movie she wants to see (like the Hunger games) we watch it first (yes even in the theatre). We've done this so far with the Avengers, Hunger Games, and the Star Trek into Darkness. Could she have gotten something from her friends? Maybe - but from what I know of her friends I doubt it. They are not in a hurry to grow up (DD just turned 12). Most of them don't have older siblings so I think maybe that helps. I can't imagine some of the stuff parents let their kids watch/play/read. It's different when they are truly in their teens, but 10-13yo'd kids, really? So, when are you going to let her watch some racier material? When she's 18? 30? Sure as hell not at 10-12. Maybe 13 or 14 depending on her maturity level. She's not restricted from anything having to do with sex, but she doesn't need to read/be exposed to stuff about S&M or really explicit stuff at her age.
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weltschmerz
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Post by weltschmerz on Nov 12, 2014 14:40:45 GMT -5
I'd be more worried about unrealistic expectations in the future. Women tell me that they don't actually like big ones. They're lying to you.
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mmhmm
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Post by mmhmm on Nov 12, 2014 14:44:18 GMT -5
Let's stay on topic, please. The thread is about schools teaching sex education. The thread is not about individual "endowments" or personal sexual experiences. Remember PG13 is the name of the game here. It has to be. - mmhmm, Administrator
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Nov 12, 2014 14:50:10 GMT -5
Let's stay on topic, please. The thread is about schools teaching sex education. The thread is not about individual "endowments" or personal sexual experiences. Remember PG13 is the name of the game here. It has to be. - mmhmm, Administrator Coincidentally PG-13 is the movie rating that we allow her to now watch without supervision or screening .
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weltschmerz
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Post by weltschmerz on Nov 12, 2014 14:53:20 GMT -5
Let's stay on topic, please. The thread is about schools teaching sex education. The thread is not about individual "endowments" or personal sexual experiences. Remember PG13 is the name of the game here. It has to be. - mmhmm, Administrator Well, that show, Virgin Coaches, asked women to pick out examples of what they think an erect penis looks like. They were SO off the mark! It's pathetic when people in their 30s are so absolutely clueless about sex. That's where sex ed comes in. Clearly, the parents taught them nothing, and I find that really sad.
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Post by swasat on Nov 12, 2014 14:56:34 GMT -5
Let's stay on topic, please. The thread is about schools teaching sex education. The thread is not about individual "endowments" or personal sexual experiences. Remember PG13 is the name of the game here. It has to be. - mmhmm, Administrator Well, that show, Virgin Coaches, asked women to pick out examples of what they think an erect penis looks like. They were SO off the mark! It's pathetic when people in their 30s are so absolutely clueless about sex. That's where sex ed comes in. Clearly, the parents taught them nothing, and I find that really sad.
I think those women were incredibly stupid if they didn't know what an erect organ looked like. Or they were putting on a show for TV. I refuse to beleieve that a 30 year old woman in this age has NEVER seen a erect penis. One does not need to have sex to know that. The pictures, TV shows, magzines, novels, books .....its easy enough to formulate an image. So lets not blame the parents for their "lack of so called knowledge". I'd blame the women themselves if they are so dumb.
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Post by ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ on Nov 12, 2014 14:57:43 GMT -5
LOL, Ratchets - you beat me to it. I was going to say they just didn't want to hurt his feelings.
And when did you turn into my father?
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weltschmerz
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Post by weltschmerz on Nov 12, 2014 14:59:28 GMT -5
Well, that show, Virgin Coaches, asked women to pick out examples of what they think an erect penis looks like. They were SO off the mark! It's pathetic when people in their 30s are so absolutely clueless about sex. That's where sex ed comes in. Clearly, the parents taught them nothing, and I find that really sad.
I think those women were incredibly stupid if they didn't know what an erect organ looked like. Or they were putting on a show for TV. I refuse to beleieve that a 30 year old woman in this age has NEVER seen a erect penis. One does not need to have sex to know that. The pictures, TV shows, magzines, novels, books .....its easy enough to formulate an image. So lets not blame the parents for their "lack of so called knowledge". I'd blame the women themselves if they are so dumb. They were Uber-Christians. That kind of material is sinful and not to be looked at.
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swasat
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Post by swasat on Nov 12, 2014 15:00:49 GMT -5
I think those women were incredibly stupid if they didn't know what an erect organ looked like. Or they were putting on a show for TV. I refuse to beleieve that a 30 year old woman in this age has NEVER seen a erect penis. One does not need to have sex to know that. The pictures, TV shows, magzines, novels, books .....its easy enough to formulate an image. So lets not blame the parents for their "lack of so called knowledge". I'd blame the women themselves if they are so dumb. They were Uber-Christians. That kind of material is sinful and not to be looked at.
LOL. Then your expectation that they know anythign about sex, or that their parents teach them anything, is unrealistic.
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Post by ArchietheDragon on Nov 12, 2014 15:01:37 GMT -5
LOL, Ratchets - you beat me to it. I was going to say they just didn't want to hurt his feelings. And I don't want to hurt their endometrium. Oh!
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weltschmerz
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Post by weltschmerz on Nov 12, 2014 15:21:53 GMT -5
They were Uber-Christians. That kind of material is sinful and not to be looked at.
LOL. Then your expectation that they know anythign about sex, or that their parents teach them anything, is unrealistic. These were engaged couples, who were clueless about....everything. Some didn't know how many orifices their bodies have. "WHAT!!?! I have three? What do you mean, three?!?" How sad is that?
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Nov 12, 2014 15:22:35 GMT -5
I remember watching BRAVEHEART with DS when it was on tv, not cable, not the movie theater, but tv. I figured they'd clean it up a bit because it was on tv and he was in elementary school. The part where the Scots moon the English before the battle cleared up for him what real SCOTS wear under their kilts. He said that very thing.
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NastyWoman
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Post by NastyWoman on Nov 12, 2014 15:31:26 GMT -5
Fortunately I am very open about sex and have no squeamishness about discussing things. So am I, but my kids must have inherited their prudishness from their GGM. Sex ed in their schools was done in 5th grade but it was split into a father/son, mother/daughter kind of thing. No girls -> no sex ed for me
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on Nov 12, 2014 15:37:29 GMT -5
I think another important part of sex education in public schools is to tell kids to talk with their parents and/or other adults in their life about sexual standards of their family. It might not even be a bad idea to make it a homework assignment that requires parental signature.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Nov 12, 2014 15:39:57 GMT -5
I had to sign for DS to learn how to put a condom on a banana. My girlfriends and I had a lot of fun laughing about that including how we hoped that he didn't think doing that to a banana was safe sex!
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Post by Deleted on Nov 12, 2014 21:04:04 GMT -5
Learn about it safely in the classroom or learn about it unsafely on the street. Either way, they are going to learn about it, even in the 9th grade. On some things I agree. Learning about S&M - I don't agree. That same argument could be used to say schools should be teaching the safe and correct way to shoot heroin or coke. Or maybe the proper way to cook meth?Not everyone is into S&M. Also, IMHO I think by discussing some things in a text book (such as teen drinking and drugs) as normal behavior that gives it a certain legitimacy that undermines values that parents may be trying to teach. After all, if they teach it at school it has to be ok, right? Absolutely we should be teaching about how the plumbing works, the hormonal/emotional drives, etc. How to prevent pregnancy and about the possibility of STD's. Beyond that is what I don't think is necessary in a class room setting. Just now got to this thread, so forgive me if its already been addressed... but... I disagree with that comparison. S&M is perfectly legal (kinky... but legal)... Heroin, Meth, and Coke aren't.
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Post by Deleted on Nov 12, 2014 21:11:28 GMT -5
The is in the details of that statement. Every student will need to know how to add, subtract, multiple, and divide when they become an adult. Algebra? Certainly a lot will benefit. Advanced Calculus? I don't know it and have never needed it. Knowledge of what areas of human sexuality is the minimum that students will need as they become adults? A teacher comfortable with human sexuality can easily teach sexual variety in a neutral way. "Okay class. Let's start by talking about ice cream. Here is a list of favorite flavors: bassettsicecream.com/p-51-List-Flavors-in-Order-of-Popularity. Most popular is Vanilla and Chocolate. But if you look down the list, you will see many different varieties. Look down the list and find Macadamia Nut. And at the bottom of the list is Pomegranate Blueberry Chunk. Now, I will admit that neither of those flavors are ones that I am going to eat. But there is certainly nothing wrong with those who do find those flavors to be tasty. Human sexuality is kind of like ice cream in that way. Most people ..." And the million dollar problem there is that not all parents want their kids taught anything goes. This discussion has made me wonder what is said about homosexual sex. Or transgendered. Once you get past biology it gets interesting. This is why it NEEDS to be done for everyone, in school. To catch the ones who's parents would not teach them what they need to know.
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Post by ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ on Nov 12, 2014 21:38:31 GMT -5
Learning the basic biology of sex, types of B/C, prevention of disease as well as unwanted pregnancy, and the option of practicing abstinence is better than learning about sex from their friends & peers, who are probably as uninformed & clueless as them.
This is the school sex-ed curriculum for the public school system in my city - and also what each grade level's clas (Jr High & H/S) covers & encompasses.
If the parents aren't going to teach their teens, at least the school will.
The majority of parents (with only a few exceptions), after reading about what the classes cover, opt-in for their kids to attend.
It isn't just a teacher conducting the class either - they bring in speakers such as nurses, drs for some classes for Q & A sessions - where the teens can ask questions they might not feel comfortable asking their parents about - and the parent might not feel comfortable about answering.
www.calgarysexualhealth.ca/programs-workshops/school-based-education/school-education-program-objectives/
As for more explicit sex, S&M, etc - as some have mentioned, they see it in movies - or on the web, and even in music videos - like the Rhianna one mentioned in the OP link.
You can block the adult channels on your TV, etc, but you can't control what they might be watching on TV or looking up online when they're at their friends houses - or what books might be on their shelves or lying on the coffee table. .
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