Vapor Lock...

[The Captain]

So DH and I were chatting after DD went to bed last night.

He always beats me home and makes dinner.  Apparently yesterday DD came to him somewhat upset because a pair of jeans which I mended for her had the front button come off (it was riveted, I put a patch in and sewed on a button, but apparently need to use stronger fabric). 

He asked her why she liked that particular pair so much and she answered

"Because they make my butt look good..."

DH then absolutely freezes for about 30 seconds, can't even think of a-single-thing to say.  At which point, when DD could catch her breath from laughing so much, gleefully points at him and says "Head Explodes!"

DD will be 12 shortly.  I am soooo looking forward to the teen years.

[NancysSummerSip]

Oct 1, 2014 12:44:25 GMT -5 The Captain said:

So DH and I were chatting after DD went to bed last night.

He always beats me home and makes dinner.  Apparently yesterday DD came to him somewhat upset because a pair of jeans which I mended for her had the front button come off (it was riveted, I put a patch in and sewed on a button, but apparently need to use stronger fabric). 

He asked her why she liked that particular pair so much and she answered

"Because they make my butt look good..."

DH then absolutely freezes for about 30 seconds, can't even think of a-single-thing to say.  At which point, when DD could catch her breath from laughing so much, gleefully points at him and says "Head Explodes!"

DD will be 12 shortly.  I am soooo looking forward to the teen years.

Upon hearing your DD say:

"Because they make my butt look good..."

Your DH went out and bought a weapon to use on the day the first boy comes to the door and asks for a date. Your DH will then dispense with said boy child, as a warning to all the other boy children, not to touch his precious.

You've been warned.

[sesfw]

When boys came calling on my g-dtrs my SIL would be sitting cleaning his gun. None of them EVER honked, they all came to the door.  

Good luck. So glad I'm way beyond those years.

[The Captain]

Oct 1, 2014 14:08:06 GMT -5 NancysSummerSip said:

Oct 1, 2014 12:44:25 GMT -5 The Captain said:

Upon hearing your DD say:

"Because they make my butt look good..."

Your DH went out and bought a weapon to use on the day the first boy comes to the door and asks for a date. Your DH will then dispense with said boy child, as a warning to all the other boy children, not to touch his precious.

You've been warned.

We have an authentic chinese meat cleaver that DH has promised to bring out along with his shotgun and cleaning kit.  I can see him now...

(Standing at kitchen counter with cutting board and pile of sausages in front of him)

"So young man...what time did you say your were going to bring the most precious girl in the world back home to me?"

Well, umm - I was thinking 11pm?

*WHAM goes the meat cleaver and chops a sausage in half* "Sorry, I could't hear you - got some...business I'm taking care of here - what time was that again?"

Ummm, urk - 10pm sir?

*WHAM* *WHAM* *WHAM*"Dang - I need to get this thing sharpened - it seems kinda dull - now what time was that again?"

(GULP) Um - how about we just go sit on the couch over there and watch TV together?

"Well daughter, seems you found a young man who knows the value of saving rather then spending.  I think you've done well"


 

[The Captain]

Oct 1, 2014 18:38:04 GMT -5 sesfw said:

When boys came calling on my g-dtrs my SIL would be sitting cleaning his gun. None of them EVER honked, they all came to the door.  

Good luck. So glad I'm way beyond those years.

My Dad had one really hard rule when it came to dating.  The first time they honked instead of coming to the door would be the LAST time.

Fortunately we never had to test it.  I do plan on applying the same to DD.

[NancysSummerSip]

We have an authentic chinese meat cleaver

I knew there was a reason we got along. I have one, too.

[tractor]

I miss all the fun since I don't have girls. I do have a large set of stainless steel "pliers" used to emasculate cattle hanging by the door, complete with instructions. I like to point them out to the boys every now and then to remind them that other dads can be just as crazy as me so be treat all girls with their utmost respect, or I might lend them out.

[wyouser]

I always thought answering the door for the first boyfriend while wearing a "Jason" mask and carrying a chain saw while sporting a giant machete stuck in ones belt worked quite nicely

[The Captain]

Oct 2, 2014 10:12:07 GMT -5 wyouser said:

I always thought answering the door for the first boyfriend while wearing a "Jason" mask and carrying a chain saw while sporting a giant machete stuck in ones belt worked quite nicely

Brilliant!  I will have to pass that on to DH.

[Bluerobin]

So has DH dropped DD off at the convent yet?

[NoNamePerson]

Parents of girls have it easy when it comes to dating. You get to meet the boy she is dating because he comes to pick her up.

Having a son I never knew if he was picking up Angie the Angel or Holly the Hooker