Holiday Drama

[Artemis Windsong]

Because of two granddaughter-in-laws constant bickering both in person and online over behaviors neither one is going to change, Thanksgiving family dinner is ruined and will not be held.  The Christmas gathering is also cancelled.

The adults in this family do not have time for this.  Neither of you have had any guidance from h.s. graduation until now on proper social behavior. 

Both of your incomes are being put in jeopardy because if I were a business owner, you would not be my manager for long with this nonsensical snit fit.  For the other, I would not want my child in your daycare.

The truce on this is ignore and distance the other person and stay out of each other's way.



  

[Deleted]

Are the GDILs members of this board?? Do I know them? Who is it? Inquiring minds and all that!

[Shooby]

Can't you just all sneak out for dinner somewhere without them?

[NancysSummerSip]

Or just have the gathering without them?
Oh, if they are minors, or living with adult relations who are invited, I could see why there would be an issue.

It's sad to cancel an entire gathering on account of two misbehaving misfits. Would it help if you read them the riot act, and if they acted up, either sent them to opposite corners, facing the wall, or outside to duke it out while everyone else had a nice time?

[Artemis Windsong]

I doubt they are on this board.  The issue is 250 miles away in another town where my DD lives.  Last year one of these GDIL invited everyone but us for Thanksgiving dinner.  At Christmas something similar happened but with another side of the family in another town.  The invisible grandparents we are. 

I am trying to come up with an alternative.  My other grandkids are going to other rellies so they have options. 

My DS and SIL drive hundreds of miles a week so traveling to another town is most unfair to them.  We did invite them to come to our place.  DS and family, GrS and GrGrS will be in our town.  Something might come together for the majority of us.

In years gone by, we would travel to DD's house and SIL made wonderful dinner and everyone mostly got along.  I took the Xmas gifts with so that reduced mailing expense.

My DS says I'm putting too much importance on seeing the grown Grkids.  They will see us when they can.

[Green Eyed Lady]

How do you have granddaughters-in law?  What does that mean?  

Anyway...if they don't want to get along, I hope you have a blessed holiday season anyway.  You can choose your friends...

[Deleted]

Married to her grandsons.

[Green Eyed Lady]

Ohhhhhhhh.  I get it.  I blame the cold medicine.  I read "the adults in the family do not have time for this" and thought they were teenagers or something.

[ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ]

My DS says I'm putting too much importance on seeing the grown Grkids. They will see us when they can.

That's just sad. They could come to regret it if the next time they can find the time is showing up for your funeral.

[Shooby]

Btw what do they bicker about?

[Deleted]

 Two hens vying for Alpha status will bicker and peck each other just for sheer spite.

[sesfw]

This is sad but I do know the feeling.  My two grand-daughters haven't seen each other since last Christmas Day when they were both here.  They live within 20 miles of each other.  I told both of them they didn't have to get along but at my home they had to be kind to each other.  And they were.

Now the oldest one is pg and due in January.  Youngest one is living with a dork and it's the dork that is the bone of contention.  Don't know what we'll do this year.  Right now DH and I are planning dinner for ourselves.  Being low sodium makes for interesting recipes.  LOL

[chiver78]

can't you just invite who you want and insist on a truce in your home? it will be a lot more peaceful that way.

my T-day party has included my parents, sis and BIL, and one cousin that has moved out to Nebraska in the last couple years, plus her kids on occasion. this is the family that I actually like, and want to spend my holidays with in my home. it's been so peaceful and nice since we made that change, I can't imagine going back to spending the days with people I have to bite my tongue around.

  I hope you can enjoy your holidays without too much stress.

[Happy prose]

I wouldn't let grand children run the show. Screw them and have your party without them. 

[Artemis Windsong]

Grand daughters-in-law are married to twin brothers.

The problem is the decrepit life style of one GrDIL. 

A family member has a friend who is on this board and probably knows the players.

I will have a nice Thanksgiving and I can already smell the roasting turkey and dressing.  I cast my .wish on the turkey wishbone for family peace.

[Artemis Windsong]

Family bickering has been trumped with an exH, grown children's father, heart attack and life support.

[sesfw]

I'm so very sorry.

[Jaguar]

That's awful, so sorry for everyone.

[Happy prose]

Very sorry to hear.

[Artemis Windsong]

The miracles of medicine saved his life.  I had to get the info 2nd hand because because and I don't know why.

Adjust the helmet, shield and bow/arrows then onward to the next challenge. 

[tootsieroll]

I am sorry you are dealing with family drama. This thread hit a personal note for me because of last week. DH's aunt was found dead last week, out of the blue, at age 55. She did some questionable things in the past, had a messy divorce, and more or less stopped talking to her kids. She later regretted her actions and tried to get her kids to talk to her again, but they wanted nothing to do with her. And her three kids saw her for the first time in two and a half years last week, in a casket. So much regret and sadness. It was awful.

Like my father-in-law says, "you don't get any do-overs." I hope that the bickering can end or at least temporarily stop for the holidays. And I hope the exH is on the mend.

[thyme4change]

Invite your Grandsons, but tell them to leave their wives at home - be specific.