Disgruntled neighbors and landscaping plans

[gooddecisions]

We bought a house a few months ago in a planned neighborhood on a 1/2 acre lot. The house came with a wild, untamed forest in the back yard. I personally liked it natural because it provided privacy which I value. My husband did not like it and want to clean it up, fence it in, add privacy shrubs along the fence line, build a shed, add a play set and make it better for our children to play in. Despite my initial resistance, I love that vision but know it will take awhile for privacy shrubs to mature, but when it does- it will be better because they will provide privacy year round when the leaves fall. We introduced ourselves to our backyard neighbors a couple of months ago and mentioned we'd probably do some stuff. They seemed amicable enough.

The tree guys we hired came this weekend and they cleared out all the small stuff (because it was untamed and natural there were tons of tall, tree-like weeds and small trees), 4 dead trees and 3 other trees that were not healthy because they were too close to other trees. Now the 30 remaining trees can have the space they need to branch out and thrive. Those 30 trees are tall oaks; it was the small crappy stuff- not the trees, that was preventing the direct line of sight into the neighbor's back yard. The tall trees provide privacy for the second story windows and that hasn't changed. But, now of course, we can see right into each others backyards when outside and the neighbors are pissed. She yelled at the tree guys both days they were out. We intervened because they did not deserve to be yelled at and then she yelled at us. She told us she cried all weekend about the trees coming down. Our neighbors have 2 trees in their backyard, beautiful green grass, small plants and lots of room for their lab to run around. We were exceptionally nice to her and dealing with her inappropriateness but I really wanted to tell her to shove off and plant some privacy trees/shrubs instead of just relying on our yard to provide it all while she gets a usable yard.

The association is thrilled with our plans and the director actually thanked us personally. This work obviously comes at an expense.

Thoughts about all this? Have you ever experienced dealing with a disgruntled neighbor over something you were well within your rights to do or been disgruntled at a neighbor for doing something they were well within their rights to do but you didn't want?

[Deleted]

30 trees on a half acre lot.   I think you have about 29 trees too many still.

[reader79]

Isn't the saying 'Good fences make good neighbors.' I would proceed with your plan and build it asap.

[gooddecisions]

Yeah, I wondered if anyone would catch that...definitely nothing to cry over.

[The Captain]

Thoughts about all this? Have you ever experienced dealing with a disgruntled neighbor over something you were well within your rights to do or been disgruntled at a neighbor for doing something they were well within their rights to do but you didn't want?

We had a neighbor do something that was NOT within their rights.  He requested permission to clear some trees that were blocking sunlight from getting to his pool.  We gave him permission for a fixed number of trees/linear feet of shared property line.

I came home from work one day to find one of his trucks (he runs a landscaping business) parked on my lawn with tire ruts running over 100 feet because he apparently didn't want to drive his heavy duty truck on his pristine lawn, but it was ok to trash ours.  Oh, and the truck was driven there so he could clear out more trees from our property (without permission).

Other than him (we share property lines with 7 homes - we live on over two acres), everyone else gets along well and usually will offer to assist in clearing trees that are felled by storms etc.  Most of the lots are over an acre so there's plenty of space for everyone.

[raeoflyte]

My parents back neighbors cut down a 6 foot tall shrubbery that used to block the views between the 2 places.  No one thinks it looks very nice without, but they never would have complained to the neighbors about it.  That's just unbelievable that she was so unreasonable.  

[muttleynfelix]

I work for developers. I get to hear neighborhood complaints all the time.

[Waffle]

I was once the neighbor who caused the other neighbors to become disgruntled.  Their yard had a chain link fence - my yard had no fence.  In a corner of my back yard, near their fence - there was a patch of overgrown shrubs, weeds, etc.  One weekend I started to cut it down and the neighbor lady came out and told me that that was her land and she didn't want it disturbed.  I told her I didn't believe it was - but I stopped. 

Long story short - surveyors came out and marked the four corners of my yard - she had even less land than she thought. Another neighbor and I finished cleaning out the brush.  Eventually she moved away.  During the several years that we lived near each other, we basically ignored each other.

[gooddecisions]

Oct 17, 2013 12:52:05 GMT -5 The Captain said:

Thoughts about all this? Have you ever experienced dealing with a disgruntled neighbor over something you were well within your rights to do or been disgruntled at a neighbor for doing something they were well within their rights to do but you didn't want?

We had a neighbor do something that was NOT within their rights.  He requested permission to clear some trees that were blocking sunlight from getting to his pool.  We gave him permission for a fixed number of trees/linear feet of shared property line.

I came home from work one day to find one of his trucks (he runs a landscaping business) parked on my lawn with tire ruts running over 100 feet because he apparently didn't want to drive his heavy duty truck on his pristine lawn, but it was ok to trash ours.  Oh, and the truck was driven there so he could clear out more trees from our property (without permission).

Other than him (we share property lines with 7 homes - we live on over two acres), everyone else gets along well and usually will offer to assist in clearing trees that are felled by storms etc.  Most of the lots are over an acre so there's plenty of space for everyone.

I remember that story. The nerve of some people. If I wouldn't have known better, I would have thought our neighbor was acting, even though she never said it, as if we were taking down her trees: the body language, the screaming, the crying...jeez. But, there was no doubt about it. We made sure we were on our property and the tree guys knew exactly what they were doing. She has a fence and there is a 18 ft utility easement between our yards. Nothing is planted in the utility easement, so all 4 dead trees, 3 unhealthy trees and however many crappy weeds that went down were most definitely in our yard.

[tootsieroll]

I agree with others that her anger is a bit over the top. I am guessing she doesn't like change.

When we lived in Texas, we had 1/4 acre, but the houses were close to each other, about 12 feet between our house and the next house on our road. Our neighbor decided to pour a 6 x 12 foot cement slab right on the other side of our fence and right outside of our kitchen window. He turned it into an outdoor kennel for his dog, which he more or less neglected. The dog barked all day and night, wasn't given fresh food, and the best part, crapped on the pad and we could smell it in our kitchen if the windows were open. He would spray down the crap every few weeks, which would seep under our fence and give us a lovely river of crap outside our window. We got fed up after several weeks of neglect that we called the humane society to investigate. The report later said that because the dog had shelter - a dog house on the pad - there were no signs of neglect. A few months later, they abandoned their house and it was foreclosed on eventually it was bought by a lovely older woman who put a shed on the slab. Much less stinky!

[Deleted]

I'd be on the lookout for buried bodies... Or pot plants... Sounds like she was way too attached to your trees.

[Wisconsin Beth]

Maybe she thought unicorns and elves lived in there? 

[Tiny]

This is where you do a "Sheldon" from the Big Bang Theory and go "There, There" with as much faux compassion as you can muster.

From your neighbors point of view she just lost the 'green' backdrop to her yard and assumes it's going to look like it does FOREVER!!.

I'd proceed with your plans -- unless you can reliably talk/trick/manipulate your upset neighbor into the expense of putting the screening hedges/evergreens on HER property     A friend waited 5 years for her neighbors to install privacy fences on their property lines.  She added about 15 feet of fence and a gate to complete the job of fencing her yard    (FWIW:  it was a new development and as people bought houses they fenced.... she just excercized a bit of patience)  

Your neighbor is Darn Lucky --- she'll be getting a lot of benefit (for free) from the screen/hedges which you will be installing (and paying for).


Sometimes people can't see beyond the immediate moment.

[Tiny]

Thoughts about all this? Have you ever experienced dealing with a disgruntled neighbor over something you were well within your rights to do or been disgruntled at a neighbor for doing something they were well within their rights to do but you didn't want?

::sigh:: my neighbors added on to the back of their house (giving it a beautiful kitchen!!) and added lovely deck as well. Unfortunately, all of my kitchen windows look out on to their deck. And we are all at eye level. So I can wash dishes and wave hello OR if I am sit at the kitchen table I can glance up and see them sitting out and if my window is open we can have a conversation without raising our voices.

The deck is also situated to 'look out' over my patio, yard and garage. Also their big kitchen window looks out the same way... so if they are sitting IN their kitchen at their table they can watch me come and go and we can wave. Also if I'm using my patio - and they are using their deck it's like we're all sitting in the same 'room'. I find it alittle uncomfortable.

I now keep the kitchen windows closed and the blinds down during the summer (which I did most of the time in the summer anyway because it's a southern exposure).

I was kinda hoping they'd install something that would provide a bit of privacy...but they haven't... it's been 3 years. I've let the couple of large lilacs in my yard get even larger in an effort to screen my yard (so I feel like I have some privacy).

I'm not upset with my neighbors - they had every right to do the addition and the deck... I just marvel that they DON"T seem to feel uncomfortable with the deck space (when they can clearly see into my house).

[Clever Username]

I'll share my favorite quote from American Beauty.


Well, they were still mad at you for cutting down their sycamore.
Their sycamore? Come on.
A substantial portion of the root structure was on our property.

[cronewitch]

My neighbors planted grape plants near our property. They are my ISO's favorite kind of grapes(he assumes)and never in the stores, that is just mean. His plan is to sneak over when they aren't home and eat the grapes. They grow veggies too and sometimes give him some so maybe he should just be nice. Sometimes he gives them fish tuna once mostly salmon.

Eying someone else's garden with a little hunger in your look might work. A little boy looked over our fence once and told me I had 7 pumpkins so when I picked them I gave his mother one.

[The Captain]

Oct 17, 2013 13:50:14 GMT -5 tootsieroll said:

I agree with others that her anger is a bit over the top. I am guessing she doesn't like change.

When we lived in Texas, we had 1/4 acre, but the houses were close to each other, about 12 feet between our house and the next house on our road. Our neighbor decided to pour a 6 x 12 foot cement slab right on the other side of our fence and right outside of our kitchen window. He turned it into an outdoor kennel for his dog, which he more or less neglected. The dog barked all day and night, wasn't given fresh food, and the best part, crapped on the pad and we could smell it in our kitchen if the windows were open. He would spray down the crap every few weeks, which would seep under our fence and give us a lovely river of crap outside our window. We got fed up after several weeks of neglect that we called the humane society to investigate. The report later said that because the dog had shelter - a dog house on the pad - there were no signs of neglect. A few months later, they abandoned their house and it was foreclosed on eventually it was bought by a lovely older woman who put a shed on the slab. Much less stinky!

Ok, you win.

[tractor]

I could tell several stories about people trying the dictate how property they do not own should be managed. In the end it's still your property and you can do whatever you want. I would cover it with fake woodland creatures, such as garden nomes and pink flamicos just to piss them off.

Just this week I got a scathing e-mail from a landowner claiming we had destroyed her property and we better send someone out to fix it immediately (I'm in vegetation management for a power company). After checking into it it turns out she has been using the neighbors property as her own for 20 years and claimed she had control over it . I spoke with the actual owners who were quite happy with the work we did. They were unaware that she thought the property was hers ( it was a vacant 80 acre parcel in the country). When I confronted the complainer with the facts, she quickly backed down claiming " she was only looking out for the neighbors". Funny she never mentioned that fact when yelling at me, my boss, and several other people in the company...

I'm fortunate to live on 40 acres, so we aren't bothered by neighbors too much.

[Wisconsin Beth]

But do they share veggies and flowers with you?  As rent? 

[zibazinski]

I'm so glad we have the neighbors that we do now. The old ones were lazy and nasty. These people a so nice and so thoughtful. They want a tree taken down in their back yard because it hangs over their house and they are worried a storm will make it fall on their house. We share a driveway and we do have a huge sycamore that is scheduled for pruning this fall. Because the crane or whatever has to come up our driveway they were worried that it would damage our tree and wanted to coordinate with us so it didn't. They even offered to wait until we took the tree out which is coming in a few years. Now no way would we let them worry about a tree landing on their home to save our sycamore  so we will work with their tree guy who doesn't seem to be responding to DFs calls in order to prune ours enough to let the tree removal for them go forward. Contrast to the old neighbors would would have just willy nilly removed the tree and if it hurt our tree tough nuts.

[tskeeter]

Oct 18, 2013 8:56:45 GMT -5 @sroo4 said:

MrSroo and I live in Neighbor Bliss.  It turns out we moved into a backyard collective.   It's really quite odd.   Basically we are on the corner.  The corner in the back opposite the street corner has been merged with the neighbors next door and the house directly behind the neighbors.   There is a huge garden that the two neighbors collectively plant and tend.  

At first I thought it was really weird in that I'm in the good fences make good neighbors camp.  A fence was one of the first things we had planned on putting in.   I think we may have been brainwashed,  because we still haven't put one in yet.   I have to say it's nice to be able to look out in the backyard and see the beautiful garden in the summer.  We have a few 'islands' of rocks, shrubs and trees to break things up.  It really is park-like. 

If we were to put up a fence,  it would be a bit awkward in that we'd have to work something out about the portion of our yard that is part of their garden.  The boundary is currently marked, so I'm not worried about anyone else claiming it.  But to put a fence up would mean that we'd either fence in about 2 foot of the garden, or we'd have to work something out legally to 'lease' it to them so that we wouldn't lose it. 

To imagine where the big garden is,  it's mostly on the shared property line of Neighbor 1 and 2,  and crosses the corner into our property.   Neighbor 2's property is actually split 1/2 and 1/2 between our property and Neighbor 1's prop.  So it looks more like a triangle than a square. 

	Neighbor 2
our house	Neighbor 1

Sroo, don't like to rain on your lovely neighborhood parade, but you might want to invest $100 in a quick consultation with an attorney who specializes in real estate.  As I understand it, in many states, your neighbor's long term use of a portion of your property could actually give them legal right to the property they have been using.  In some states these types of property rights can be established over periods of time that are less than a year (in particular, I've been told this is true in OR).  I believe that a simple easement granted to the gardening neighbors can proptect your interest in the property, but allow existing practices to continue uninterrupted.   

[Deleted]

We just bought a new house and have lots of mature trees in the back yard. HAH wants to take some down to make room and also because the less there, the less that can fall on the house during a storm. They are very clearly on our property and hopefully the neighbors will be ok. We currently (old house) have a fence for our dog, but this neighborhood doesn't really seem to have fences and I don't want to be the one that comes in and builds a fence around my property. Plus, i just think it would look ugly. So the pup is on a lead right now that's screwed into the ground and we are going to do an electric fence. I love, love, love all the trees and the privacy they provide. But I'll be ok with a few less.

Sorry your neighbors are being a PITA. I would tell them that you were concerned about them dying (or already being dead). My understanding from my homeowners insurance is that, if a tree from my property falls on your house, it's your problem, not mine. Tell them you were concerned about the trees falling and damaging their house, and since it would go on their homeowners claims, aren't they happy you took care of that for them? Or would they like to split the bill?

[happyhoix]

I think you might be living next to my sister.

She has melt downs. All the time. Like when she called me and I didn't answer right away. Or when a co-worker told her he could kind of see her bra through her thin cotten shirt (she quit her job over that - after she had a melt down). Or when our dinner plans got delayed for an hour when we were on vacation because another sibling was a little late getting back from sight seeing (went into her bedroom and threw shit around, then refused to go eat with us and refused to speak to the offending sibling the rest of the trip).
 
This is called histrionic personality disorder. 

Put up a big ass fence. Learn how to ignore the drama, because you haven't seen the last of it. Think about her poor husband.

[tskeeter]

Oct 21, 2013 15:28:49 GMT -5 @monkeyunderpants said:

We just bought a new house and have lots of mature trees in the back yard. HAH wants to take some down to make room and also because the less there, the less that can fall on the house during a storm. They are very clearly on our property and hopefully the neighbors will be ok. We currently (old house) have a fence for our dog, but this neighborhood doesn't really seem to have fences and I don't want to be the one that comes in and builds a fence around my property. Plus, i just think it would look ugly. So the pup is on a lead right now that's screwed into the ground and we are going to do an electric fence. I love, love, love all the trees and the privacy they provide. But I'll be ok with a few less.

Sorry your neighbors are being a PITA. I would tell them that you were concerned about them dying (or already being dead). My understanding from my homeowners insurance is that, if a tree from my property falls on your house, it's your problem, not mine. Tell them you were concerned about the trees falling and damaging their house, and since it would go on their homeowners claims, aren't they happy you took care of that for them? Or would they like to split the bill?

Monkey, falling trees can present lots of issues.  Usually, trees blown down in storms are considered acts of God,  unexpected and unpredictable, so any damage is not covered by insurance.  However, if the dead tree that you decided not to remove because it was too expensive falls on your neighbor's garage, house, or car, you could be held liable.  You knew the tree was dead.  And it is reasonably forseable that a dead tree might come down in a storm, so it wasn't an event that you could not reasonably predict and prevent.  It was entirely preventable and the only thing unpredicable was when and where it would fall, but you could be absolutely sure that it would fall sooner or later.  In that context, you would probably be guilty of negligence that caused your neighbor to suffer damages.  And you'd be responsible.  And your insurance company might be reluctant to cover the consequences of your negligent behavior.