small petty minded people

[8 Bit WWBG]

In many cases; those people have life better figured out than the rest of us.

[chiver78]

link

steve, "petty" and "authority" are often completely different poisons. while I will caution you that we are at the mercy of ProBoards rules for quite a few things, we are also still held to our own CoC. if you feel that you have a concern about something that is outside ProBoards rules of operation, please feel free to PM me with those concerns. I will see what I can do.

-chiver mod

[mmhmm]

Yes, steve, there is another option.  You can obey the CoC and ProBoards' ToS.  If you have questions regarding either, you can PM any moderator/administrator.  That is, by far, the best option if you want to post here.

mmhmm, Administrator

[GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl]

I find a sense of humor does wonders when dealing with all kinds of people.  

And, remember, the difference between cynicism and bitterness is that cynics have a well-developed sense of humor.  

[milee]

Living well really is the best revenge. 

[Deleted]

I often choose to enjoy it for what it is and mostly ignore the petty person. The thing is they really want your attention and they are sad enough that they will take negative attention over being ignored.

[Deleted]

Feels like I'm missing something....

[milee]

Mar 29, 2013 21:34:58 GMT -5 @steve said:

Mar 29, 2013 21:25:08 GMT -5 milee said:

Living well really is the best revenge. 

If you were part of an organization or group and the choice was principal and get thrown out or enjoy it for what it is and stay, what would you do?

Would you poke someone you thought was poking you just because they wanted to and could get away with it?  Assuming the pokes bothered you, because they do bother me.

Not enough data to make a decision.  I've done both those things in different situations, depending on my long term goals, what was possible, how important the group is, etc.  

[susanb]

Not sure what the OP is about (given the comments from mods), so I will just take it at face value and not read anything into it.

Yes, I deal with petty people in the course of my work and daily life.  What I have found is that the most successful people I deal with have a way of making me feel important, even though they are more successful than I am. 

In an effort to emulate people who are more successful than I am, I try to make people who act petty feel important if I need to engage with them.  Otherwise, I do my best to just ignore them. 

[Shooby]

  It really depends.  If it is my boss or something, i just have to suck it up.  If it is someone i know, i usually just walk away and don't bother.  Why let that kind of stuff get under your skin and ruin your day.  I have one particular relative like that.  The family has tried to get along with her but she just has such a way about her that it is impossible.  We are cordial and polite and loving towards her when we see her.  At first it bothered us that we couldn't engage her more, but that is just the way she is and the way things are.  So, just take the stuff at face value and move on.

[Deleted]

Smile and move on.  They might think same way about you. 

[Deleted]

Mar 30, 2013 6:57:01 GMT -5 Shooby said:

  It really depends.  If it is my boss or something, i just have to suck it up.  If it is someone i know, i usually just walk away and don't bother.  Why let that kind of stuff get under your skin and ruin your day.  I have one particular relative like that.  The family has tried to get along with her but she just has such a way about her that it is impossible.  We are cordial and polite and loving towards her when we see her.  At first it bothered us that we couldn't engage her more, but that is just the way she is and the way things are.  So, just take the stuff at face value and move on.

Take it as face value. Great point!  Shooby.

[zibazinski]

If you're talking about a moderator, I had trouble with one on the old board and found others did as well. When transitioning to the new board, the mod was no longer a mod. If you're having trouble, others are as well, and it will get handled eventually. In the meantime, sit back and relax.

[Reckless Roselia]

I cannot stand small and petty minded people but you've got no choice but to ignore them ... or sometimes impress them. 

[Deleted]

Mar 30, 2013 7:18:50 GMT -5 Reckless Roselia said:

I cannot stand small and petty minded people but you've got no choice but to ignore them ... or sometimes impress them. 

Why you wants to be judge by others and judge others.Rose.

Best way to handle the situation is  try to finds like minded people. If it's not take it as face value and go forward. Like what Shooby mentioned.

Nobody's shouldn't be judged one way or other. It's not our place to judge others.

[zibazinski]

Sure enough, but we do, so why not deal with reality as opposed to fantasy? 

[8 Bit WWBG]

...:::"so why not stand on principal":::...

I don't know where you went to school, but my principal sure wasn't down with us standing on her.  Its not really nice to stand on people in general.

Phil also stands firm on the idea that paying extra principal is a waste of money -- you are tying up capital that could be used to build wealth.  Though he seems alright with the idea if you have a goal like getting to 20% equity.

[zibazinski]

[Deleted]

It can happen in real life. If that's what you really wants, believe with your heart.

I am an living prove of that, sort of speak. Just took me many years to find that out.

[Deleted]

Mar 30, 2013 7:44:29 GMT -5 8 Bit WWBG said:

...:::"so why not stand on principal":::...

I don't know where you went to school, but my principal sure wasn't down with us standing on her.  Its not really nice to stand on people in general.

Phil also stands firm on the idea that paying extra principal is a waste of money -- you are tying up capital that could be used to build wealth.  Though he seems alright with the idea if you have a goal like getting to 20% equity.

You have a every right to live your life the way you see fits.
As long as you don't hurt other's during the process.

[8 Bit WWBG]

FWIW Steve, I don't want to see you gone.

If its any consolation, I work with someone who is one of those "corporate bulldogs" that you hire specifically to block initiatives and make things difficult for everyone.  He is a "bully" type, and he is big enough and loud enough that most people back off when he gets aggressive.  To make it worse, he is high enough rank and has one of our top managers full backing.  So in 95% of all cases, he is likely to get what he wants eventually.

We'll ignore the fact that his ideas make minimal business sense, and his understanding or care for the overall organizational well being is nil.  He was hired to be an attack dog, and in this he is effective.

The best way to deal with him is to refuse to engage him in ways that trigger his comfort zone.  He wants to get into yelling matches.  He wants to have lengthy discussions and wear people down by sticking to stubborn selfish irrational arguments.

But deny him that, and he is powerless.  Aim him somewhere else (at someone who will engage him) and he forgets about you.

[zibazinski]

Sounds like our HOA president. Another reason I hate HOAS. We had a nice laid back HOA and then this bitch for herself elected and browbeat all the guys on the board. Most have resigned or won't come back so now she can fill it with her cronies. What she doesn't know is that we have prof she used association money for her personal property and that's going to bite her big time at the general meeting of homeowners because I intend to bring it up. The treasurer resigned over it. 

[NancysSummerSip]

I work with one of those small-minded- petty people. My best revenge will come when I find a new job, look at her and say, "SEEEEEEE YAAAAAAAA, TOOTS!" and vanish out the office door, tossing my key and passcard at her and not bothering to wait for her to catch it.

[kittensaver]

I work with a couple of government contract monitors who are petty tyrants. We all (me, my CEO and CFO) shake our heads and get on with our business. We've seen them fall before, and these two will also eventually fall/move on/get fired/get transferred/retire/leave. Old age and treachery will outwit youth and vigor every time .

[Jaguar]

My oldest sister is beyond petty and small minded. A week ago there's a succession of 3 calls left on my answering machine all within 4 minutes of each other. I have lung cancer in both my lungs and I thought this was why I got 3 urgent calls withing 4 minutes. NOPE, she couldn't get into her Yahoo account to play euchre. When I explained about my lung cancer all she said was "How do I get into my Yahoo Account ?".

[taz157]

Sug - I'm sorry to hear you have lung cancer in both lungs.  I wish you well with treatments, decisions, etc.  

[Jaguar]

Mar 30, 2013 21:35:49 GMT -5 taz157 said:

Sug - I'm sorry to hear you have lung cancer in both lungs.  I wish you well with treatments, decisions, etc.  

Don't worry Taz, the nodules are small, 11mm in the left and a .9mm in the right. I got a fantastic highly rated surgeon. Thanks for your concern & thoughts.

[Deleted]

Mar 30, 2013 21:35:49 GMT -5 taz157 said:

Sug - I'm sorry to hear you have lung cancer in both lungs.  I wish you well with treatments, decisions, etc.  

  Take care, Sug.

[Cass]

Mar 30, 2013 22:24:29 GMT -5 Jaguar said:

Mar 30, 2013 21:35:49 GMT -5 taz157 said:

Sug - I'm sorry to hear you have lung cancer in both lungs.  I wish you well with treatments, decisions, etc.  

Don't worry Taz, the nodules are small, 11mm in the left and a .9mm in the right. I got a fantastic highly rated surgeon. Thanks for your concern & thoughts.

What a great attitude Sugi!  Best of luck hon

[Jaguar]

Namaste Everyone and thanks so much.