thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Mar 6, 2013 12:43:05 GMT -5
At what age did you force your children to take showers every day?
At what age did you let your children go away from both parents for a multiple night trip?
At what age did you let your children come home to an empty house after school?
At what age did you let your children set their own bedtime?
At what age did your kids manage their own email account and other on-line activities?
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Mar 6, 2013 12:43:34 GMT -5
I'm not there yet on any of them.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Mar 6, 2013 12:44:17 GMT -5
Me neither - but this summer I might bring on the every day shower rule. Pee-yew.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Mar 6, 2013 12:46:02 GMT -5
I would have let DS go on vacation for 3 days with his friend last summer (friend's mom is a good friend of mine) but DH said no.
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milee
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Post by milee on Mar 6, 2013 12:49:23 GMT -5
At what age did you force your children to take showers every day? Since birth. We lived in Phoenix and now SW Florida. Unwashed children are not a good thing. Pretty sure they start to grow mold after a day around here.
At what age did you let your children go away from both parents for a multiple night trip? Son #1 - 6, Son #2 - 7, trip was with family member
At what age did you let your children come home to an empty house after school? My oldest is 12 and would be fine coming home to an empty house. He was probably ready around 10 or 11.
At what age did you let your children set their own bedtime? Still not there. The oldest -12 - is a night owl and would stay up to midnight if we didn't set a time, so no go.
At what age did your kids manage their own email account and other on-line activities? The 12 year old has an email account and a computer. DH and I monitor (without telling him) his web activity by doing a spot review every other week or so. The 8 year old is only allowed to use my computer with me working there beside him and doesn't have an email account. Neither are on Facebook.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 6, 2013 12:49:35 GMT -5
At what age did you force your children to take showers every day? At what age did you let your children go away from both parents for a multiple night trip? At what age did you let your children come home to an empty house after school? At what age did you let your children set their own bedtime? At what age did your kids manage their own email account and other on-line activities? I am not there yet either. As kids, we didn't need to be forced to take showers, but I grew up with a bunch of girls. I didn't go on multiple-day overnight trips until HS. I believe a kid has to be about 12 to stay home alone since that's the age limit for after school programs around here. We got to set our bedtimes when we got to HS. My nephew signed up for a Facebook account when he was 11 (lied about his age) so I am going to say that I'll discuss it with the kiddos around that age.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 6, 2013 12:53:24 GMT -5
At what age did you force your children to take showers every day? At what age did you let your children go away from both parents for a multiple night trip? At what age did you let your children come home to an empty house after school? At what age did you let your children set their own bedtime? At what age did your kids manage their own email account and other on-line activities? Not there except for multi night trip. Probably around 4 months.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Mar 6, 2013 12:54:45 GMT -5
My neighbor is going away for 4 days with her kids, and asked if my son wanted to go. My hubby said no. I don't know how to talk him into it.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 6, 2013 12:58:41 GMT -5
At what age did you force your children to take showers every day? At what age did you let your children go away from both parents for a multiple night trip? At what age did you let your children come home to an empty house after school? At what age did you let your children set their own bedtime? At what age did your kids manage their own email account and other on-line activities? Oldest is 10 (11 in July) We started every other day shower rule about a year ago. He's gone on multiple day trips with his grandparents for a long time now (maybe starting at 5 or 6). And this summer will be doing a 7 day scouting trip without a parent. Starting in 4th grade (he's in 5th now) he started riding the bus home everyday after school. He gets there about 3. My husband is sometimes home about 4, but usually it's me home first around 4:30-5. Both kids go to bed at 8 still. I let older one read in bed a little later, but I don't see not having a bedtime for quite a while. He has to get up at 5:30am for school. I'm horrible about policing the online stuff. He has an ipod and has had his own email account for several years (although he doesn't really use it), I'll sometimes check his web browsing history and it's always the same stuff. Youtube Mindcraft videos...
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Malarky
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Post by Malarky on Mar 6, 2013 13:00:50 GMT -5
At what age did you force your children to take showers every day? I lied to my kids and told them they wouldn't be allowed to attend school if they didn't shower. Baths were reserved for weekends when time wasn't such an issue.At what age did you let your children go away from both parents for a multiple night trip? Eight or so. DS has had little desire to go anywhere. DD has been much more adventurous. At 13 I let her take a direct flight alone with me on one end and Grandma on the other.At what age did you let your children come home to an empty house after school? Fourth grade.At what age did you let your children set their own bedtime? High school.At what age did your kids manage their own email account and other on-line activities? High school. If I haven't gotten through to them by now, I'm not going to.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Mar 6, 2013 13:03:43 GMT -5
I'm considering making both my kids get a g-mail account and then having them manage their own calendar, which we can synch up, so my DH and I can look at everyone's calendar from a smart phone or computer. That would help with planning our activities. They could also put homework projects on there and stuff, and we could have a common record for all the things they need to accomplish. I can see my daughter thinking this is the greatest thing ever. I can see this being torture for my son.
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Malarky
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Post by Malarky on Mar 6, 2013 13:13:56 GMT -5
I'm considering making both my kids get a g-mail account and then having them manage their own calendar, which we can synch up, so my DH and I can look at everyone's calendar from a smart phone or computer. That would help with planning our activities. They could also put homework projects on there and stuff, and we could have a common record for all the things they need to accomplish. I can see my daughter thinking this is the greatest thing ever. I can see this being torture for my son. I can see your son not keeping up with inputting the info you need. Kill me before you make me keep track of my life electronically.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 6, 2013 13:28:48 GMT -5
I'm not there with any of them, but DS cannot, CANNOT, go for more than 2 days without a bath. He has stinky feet.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Mar 6, 2013 13:31:30 GMT -5
My husband is cursing the fact that he doesn't do well keeping an electronic calendar. And that is why I'm wondering if it would be good to start that discipline in my son. I don't think our society will get less technology focused in his lifetime, so if he has been doing it since he was 10 (or whatever) maybe it will be second nature to him at some later point. He is disorganized and has started missing deadlines and what-not. Teaching him to put stuff on a calendar, and check that calendar might help keep him focused on deliverables. If he needs me to remember something and it isn't on the calendar, he will have to suffer the consequences - maybe I scheduled something else for him, maybe I won't be available to drive him, etc.
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alabamagal
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Post by alabamagal on Mar 6, 2013 14:12:08 GMT -5
At what age did you force your children to take showers every day? - When they were babies we only did baths every other night. Probably at age 2 baths/showers every night. Since it was routine that is always what they did.
At what age did you let your children go away from both parents for a multiple night trip? Mine went to visit my parents in FL starting at age 5 for up to a week in summer and/or spring break. They also went on an RV trip for 3 weeks when they were 9, 11 and 12 (3 kids went on one trip). For non-family, the boys went to boy scout camp (1 week) at age 11.
At what age did you let your children come home to an empty house after school? Started when my kids were 8, 10 and 11. I always felt better with safety in numbers. Also since they went to private school, they were dropped off at home by DH and then he went back to work 3 miles from home.
At what age did you let your children set their own bedtime? High school. None of them were night owls until they went away to college.
At what age did your kids manage their own email account and other on-line activities? At 12 they had MySpace accounts and other online activities. All through high school the family computer was in the living room. We did not specifically monitor them, but I think they were hesitant to go to any "bad" sites.
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Sum Dum Gai
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Post by Sum Dum Gai on Mar 6, 2013 14:19:03 GMT -5
They have to shower every other day, or any day they have swim or some other sport. They did that as toddlers, but only with family. 10 and 11. They don't, they're both night owls like dad and would be up until after midnight. They were 8 and 10 when they got their own computers. I monitor what they do, but we don't have net nanny software on them.
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Mar 6, 2013 14:23:50 GMT -5
So, speaking of showers - when did your kids started doing it themselves?
I say showers, bc that's what I've done from the time they were about infants. Once they were able to sit up, I did showers. We do bubble bath as a special thing
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Mar 6, 2013 14:33:31 GMT -5
At what age did you force your children to take showers every day? At what age did you let your children go away from both parents for a multiple night trip? At what age did you let your children come home to an empty house after school? At what age did you let your children set their own bedtime? At what age did your kids manage their own email account and other on-line activities? Showers - the whole family suffers from really dry skin - in cold climates every day is overkill. If there is exercise or other physical activity - then yes a shower - otherwise every other day. Multiple night trip? Not there yet. She just started staying at friends houses overnight at the age of 9. Empty home? - In my state not legal until they are 12 - even then I'd like to find some alternative until she is say 14? Bedtime? - When she moves out. Internet? - She's 10, we watch this like a hawk. Her dad is IT so I suspect she won't be able to manage her on-line activities until she moves out. We've also decided she can't date until she's 30
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 6, 2013 14:45:13 GMT -5
Showers with an infant? I would love to do this with DS (he's 19 months old), but I just cringe thinking about him trying to fool around and accidentally slipping and busting his head open.
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Sum Dum Gai
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Post by Sum Dum Gai on Mar 6, 2013 14:46:32 GMT -5
[ quote] We've also decided she can't date until she's 30 [/quote] That's the same age we picked! 5 or 6.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Mar 6, 2013 14:48:58 GMT -5
We try to make DS shower on his own, he's 6, but he'll just stand there and randomly rub a bar of soap on himself.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Mar 6, 2013 14:58:54 GMT -5
I showered with babies. You just hold them. It's mostly their crotch and butt that's nasty. When they could stand, I used a handheld. My kids have sensitive skin so they can't sit in a tub because they'd break out.
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muttleynfelix
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Post by muttleynfelix on Mar 6, 2013 15:00:23 GMT -5
At what age did you force your children to take showers every day? Not there yet. Whenever he stinks. At what age did you let your children go away from both parents for a multiple night trip? 3, but it was with essentially family. He stayed with some friends from church for 2 nights while DH had surgery. I was 5 when my parents sent me for a week to my Grandparent's farm. I was 8 the first time I went to overnight camp. At what age did you let your children set their own bedtime? When I would come home from college, my mom would nag me about going to bed at a certain time. We aren't talking like I was staying up to midnight, we are talking like 9pm and she would be like, don't you need to go to bed. Right now she is staying with us and I'm going to bed at like 8 or 9! I never make through the 9pm news with her. I make it like 2 minutes and I say ok good night. She doesn't have to nag me now.
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muttleynfelix
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Post by muttleynfelix on Mar 6, 2013 15:05:32 GMT -5
Showers with an infant? I would love to do this with DS (he's 19 months old), but I just cringe thinking about him trying to fool around and accidentally slipping and busting his head open. We regularly shower with DS and have since about 18 months. We have a large shower in our bathroom (seperate tub) and we plug the drain and he can splash around in a couple inches of water and we can get clean and then we wash him. Since ours is a seperate shower, the bottom isn't smooth. I think he is more likely to slip and fall in the tub than in the shower and if he does fall in the shower, he isn't as likely to swallow a bunch of water. I don't know why he doesn't like baths, but he doesn't and will scream like crazy.
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imawino
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Post by imawino on Mar 6, 2013 15:13:57 GMT -5
Just fyi - once your boys hit about 12 you won't be able to keep them out of the shower! ugh. Just try not to think about it. And your house will smell strongly of Axe body spray. LOL Did anyone see Modern Family last week, when the little boy had to "get ready" to meet that girl for dinner?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 6, 2013 15:25:05 GMT -5
I shower with my 2 year old sometimes, but it's not much fun because I like the water really hot and he likes it really cold. Anything past what I consider to be lukewarm at best and he's screaming that it's too hot.
We have a shower head on a sliding bar in his bath so we can put it down to where it's his height. He's starting to take showers after he finishes his bath to rinse off. Older son was taking them on his own by the time he was 4 or 5.
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imawino
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Post by imawino on Mar 6, 2013 15:30:28 GMT -5
We try to make DS shower on his own, he's 6, but he'll just stand there and randomly rub a bar of soap on himself. I may still be guilty of that from time to time. What?! It's early when I shower, I forget what I got in there for!!! And again, once they hit about 12 the soap rubbing is probably not so random. Hello, giant hot water bill!! Ha!!! Blech. eeeeeuuuwwwww.
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sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Mar 6, 2013 15:38:57 GMT -5
Shower every day: Age 8, stopped taking baths and went all shower around age 6 or 7 Multi Night Trips- Age 6, The In-Laws used to pick him up when school got our for the summer and travel in their motor home with him for 8 weeks Home alone after school- Age 9, our house was walking distance from the school and he didn't have to cross any streets. I worked 15 minutes away Bedtime- Age 9 or 10. Our rule is (and has always been) we won't force a bedtime on you until you make us. So the first time we go to wake you up in the AM and you are grumpy or complain about being tired you are getting a bedtime. So far it hasn't been an issue. Email- DS has had is own account for school since 6th grade and a regular gmail account and a facebook profile. We reserve the right to monitor them but they are really pretty boring so it's not too exciting.
DS is 14- Dh and I are fighting over whether or not he can stay home alone all weekend while we go out of town. I'm of the "NO" opinion and DH was raised by a half ass drunk so she started leaving him home alone for the weekend when he was 6. By the time he was 14 he taught himself to drive so he could get to school and she took a job that required her to travel during the school week (single mom).
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milee
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Post by milee on Mar 6, 2013 15:52:10 GMT -5
All through high school the family computer was in the living room. We did not specifically monitor them, but I think they were hesitant to go to any "bad" sites. Not that I think this was the case with your kids specifically, but for all parents who think having the computer in a public area of the house deters risky use - unfortunately, experts are now finding that's not the case. Just a few weeks ago, a show was interviewing an FBI expert in cybercrime where kids were the victim (lured into prostitution, molested or indecent pictures by adults posing as kids in chat rooms). The expert said having the computer in a public area of the house is not a deterrant. He went into graphic detail of things they've found where the kid is posting with a parent 10 feet away - even some inappropriate pictures. So don't rely on that. I used to rely on that as a control, but don't now.
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kittensaver
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Post by kittensaver on Mar 6, 2013 15:53:34 GMT -5
At what age did you force your children to take showers every day? At what age did you let your children go away from both parents for a multiple night trip? At what age did you let your children come home to an empty house after school? At what age did you let your children set their own bedtime? At what age did your kids manage their own email account and other on-line activities? Well I got my girls when they were a little older (young teens), so this may or may not be helpful, but here ya go: They were already showering daily when I got them. They went sans us for multi-night trips to the grandparents. The oldest went back to her hometown on her own when she turned 18 (she missed her friends). The younger one went on a few academic field trips that were multi-night. Right away - they were already neglected latch-key kids, so they had an unnerving degree of independence anyway. They set their own bedtimes during the summer when school was out. We insisted on academics and good grades, so we cut them some slack during non-school times. They were the first of the online generation, and the last to communicate with their friends by pager (remember those days ). They were AOL and MySpace users, and they managed those accounts with help from hubby. Today, things would be different because the internet is vastly different.
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