NoNamePerson
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Jokes
Jan 13, 2019 11:52:16 GMT -5
Post by NoNamePerson on Jan 13, 2019 11:52:16 GMT -5
I'm on Pc right now and all I get is a big old white box. Will try later on iPad and see if I can view it there.
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Tennesseer
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Post by Tennesseer on Jan 13, 2019 13:45:50 GMT -5
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jan 13, 2019 16:05:40 GMT -5
Where was this concept back in the dark ages. Also would apply to "where are we?" for the 1,000th time.
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tigerpause
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Post by tigerpause on Jan 14, 2019 19:15:49 GMT -5
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tigerpause
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Post by tigerpause on Jan 14, 2019 19:17:08 GMT -5
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tigerpause
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Post by tigerpause on Jan 16, 2019 17:53:22 GMT -5
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gambler
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"the education of a man is never completed until he dies" Robert E. Lee
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Post by gambler on Jan 16, 2019 18:58:57 GMT -5
SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
Peter is driving down a deserted stretch of highway when he notices a sign out of the corner of his eye
Long
It reads:
SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
10 MILES
He thinks this is a figment of his imagination and drives on without second thought..
Soon he sees another sign which reads:
SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
5 MILES
Suddenly he begins to realize that these signs are for real and drives past a third sign saying:
SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
NEXT RIGHT
His curiosity gets the best of him and he pulls into the drive. On the far side of the parking lot is a stone building with a small sign next to the door reading:
SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
He climbs the steps and rings the bell. The door is answered by a nun in a long black habit who asks, 'What may we do for you my son?'
He answers, 'I saw your signs along the highway and was interested in possibly doing business....'
'Very well my son. Please follow me.' He is led through many winding passages and is soon quite disoriented. The nun stops at a closed door and tells the man, 'Please knock on this door.'
He does so and another nun in a long habit, holding a tin cup answers the door... This nun instructs, 'Please place $100 in the cup then go through the large wooden door at the end of the hallway.'
He puts $100 in the cup, eagerly trots down the hall and slips through the door pulling it shut behind him.
The door locks, and he finds himself back in the parking lot facing another sign:
GO IN PEACE. YOU HAVE JUST BEEN SCREWED BY THE SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS.
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Tennesseer
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Jokes
Jan 16, 2019 20:28:48 GMT -5
Post by Tennesseer on Jan 16, 2019 20:28:48 GMT -5
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tigerpause
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Post by tigerpause on Jan 17, 2019 22:31:10 GMT -5
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Tennesseer
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Post by Tennesseer on Jan 19, 2019 10:46:52 GMT -5
A couple, both age 78, went to a therapist’s office. The doctor asked, “What can I help you with”
The man said, “Will you watch us have s*x?” The doctor looked puzzled, but agreed. When the couple finished, the doctor said, “There’s nothing wrong with the way you have s*x,” and charged them $50.
This happened several weeks in a row. The couple would make an appointment, have s*x with no problems, pay the doctor, then leave.
Finally, the doctor asked, “Just exactly what are you trying to find out?”
“We’re not trying to find out anything,” the husband replied.”She’s married and we can’t go to her house. I’m married and we can’t go to my house. The Holiday Inn charges $90. The Hilton charges $108. We do it here for $50…and I get $43 back from Medicare.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jan 19, 2019 11:32:12 GMT -5
A couple, both age 78, went to a therapist’s office. The doctor asked, “What can I help you with” The man said, “Will you watch us have s*x?” The doctor looked puzzled, but agreed. When the couple finished, the doctor said, “There’s nothing wrong with the way you have s*x,” and charged them $50. This happened several weeks in a row. The couple would make an appointment, have s*x with no problems, pay the doctor, then leave. Finally, the doctor asked, “Just exactly what are you trying to find out?” “We’re not trying to find out anything,” the husband replied.”She’s married and we can’t go to her house. I’m married and we can’t go to my house. The Holiday Inn charges $90. The Hilton charges $108. We do it here for $50…and I get $43 back from Medicare.
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Tennesseer
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Post by Tennesseer on Jan 22, 2019 18:03:05 GMT -5
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tigerpause
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Post by tigerpause on Jan 22, 2019 23:22:35 GMT -5
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Tennesseer
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Post by Tennesseer on Jan 22, 2019 23:23:38 GMT -5
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tigerpause
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Post by tigerpause on Jan 22, 2019 23:33:54 GMT -5
This one's for beer caps. Ingenuity at its finest.
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tigerpause
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Post by tigerpause on Jan 22, 2019 23:36:09 GMT -5
Brings up one of funniest episodes on The Dick Van Dyke show when they had their baby. Y'all, youse, you un's can google it on youtube maybe I'm to lazy right now. Was it this one? sharetv.com/watch/866943Even if it ain't I'm gonna watch it anyway, y'all
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Jan 23, 2019 0:12:19 GMT -5
Y'all-
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irishpad
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Post by irishpad on Jan 23, 2019 0:30:32 GMT -5
Brings up one of funniest episodes on The Dick Van Dyke show when they had their baby. Y'all, youse, you un's can google it on youtube maybe I'm to lazy right now. Was it this one? sharetv.com/watch/866943Even if it ain't I'm gonna watch it anyway, y'all Thanks for the post. Great writing and funny ending!
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toomuchreality
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Jokes
Jan 23, 2019 1:03:05 GMT -5
Post by toomuchreality on Jan 23, 2019 1:03:05 GMT -5
Thanks for the post. Great writing and funny ending! Good to see you. -just sayin' I hope you have been well.
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irishpad
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Post by irishpad on Jan 23, 2019 1:25:20 GMT -5
Thanks for the post. Great writing and funny ending! Good to see you. -just sayin' I hope you have been well. Thanks, been around but mostly posting on threads where I get riled up by our Commander in Chief. Still on Icey's board on Fridays, join in again if you want!
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jan 23, 2019 7:28:55 GMT -5
Brings up one of funniest episodes on The Dick Van Dyke show when they had their baby. Y'all, youse, you un's can google it on youtube maybe I'm to lazy right now. Was it this one? sharetv.com/watch/866943Even if it ain't I'm gonna watch it anyway, y'all That's it. I just didn't want to hunt for it at the moment and didn't want to add a spoiler to describe it. Thanks for digging it out. That's the only episode that I remember the whole story line after all these years~~
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jan 23, 2019 16:00:01 GMT -5
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tigerpause
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Post by tigerpause on Jan 24, 2019 18:28:51 GMT -5
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tigerpause
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Post by tigerpause on Jan 24, 2019 18:30:38 GMT -5
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jan 24, 2019 18:47:48 GMT -5
Interesting article. Thanks for posting it.
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Jan 24, 2019 22:19:29 GMT -5
This would be so much better on a political thread...
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NoNamePerson
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Jokes
Jan 25, 2019 8:27:42 GMT -5
Post by NoNamePerson on Jan 25, 2019 8:27:42 GMT -5
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jan 25, 2019 9:08:56 GMT -5
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tigerpause
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Post by tigerpause on Jan 25, 2019 16:20:19 GMT -5
The first letters of the words I saw start with M W M. The first two are in the works and the last came true already
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tigerpause
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Post by tigerpause on Jan 25, 2019 16:21:59 GMT -5
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