If you leave a small tip at a restaurant

[midjd]

I would bring it up with the server and THEN perhaps reduce the tip if it was something within the server's control.

When I was a server, I'd assume someone was cheap if they left a crappy tip but didn't complain or seem upset about the meal. I tried to fix whatever problems were brought to my attention - sometimes the customer tipped well, sometimes not, but at least I knew why. Some servers might be mind-readers, but I was not

ETA the restaurant at which I worked is my grandpa's favorite... he would usually try to get my table when he came in (and left me the special "family" tip of $1.50 ), but if he got assigned to a coworker I liked, I ALWAYS had to sneak another dollar onto the table... otherwise it was just embarrassing. He is a very kind person but a terrible tipper!

[ouchica]

Bad mother's day experience at a Mexican restaurant. Took a total of 2 hrs to get done and not because we were taking our time but b/c it took about an hour and a half to get our food after a 20 min wait to get a table. The service was just crap all around and the waiter took so long between each time he said he would bring us drinks and chips and salsa etc. I talked to the manager about the issue and he gave me half off on the bill and I told him I would still leave a small tip as that is how the waiter makes his living. My family thought I shouldn't have left him a tip but I would have felt bad to an extent if I wouldn't have.

[gsbrq]

May 27, 2011 20:46:09 GMT -5 ouchica said:

Bad mother's day experience at a Mexican restaurant. Took a total of 2 hrs to get done and not because we were taking our time but b/c it took about an hour and a half to get our food after a 20 min wait to get a table. The service was just crap all around and the waiter took so long between each time he said he would bring us drinks and chips and salsa etc. I talked to the manager about the issue and he gave me half off on the bill and I told him I would still leave a small tip as that is how the waiter makes his living. My family thought I shouldn't have left him a tip but I would have felt bad to an extent if I wouldn't have.

1 - The waiter had nothing to do with your wait to be seated. And honestly, you're complaining about waiting for 20 minutes on Mother's Day? What did you expect?

2 - I have a hard time believing your food took an hour and a half after you ordered....even on Mother's Day. In my experience, people spend a lot more time dawdling over the menus that they think they do... and then exaggerate how long they have to wait for their food.

3 - If your food really took that long, why didn't you ask the waiter/manager what was going on? No way would I just sit there for an hour and a half.

[AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP]

1 - The waiter had nothing to do with your wait to be seated. And honestly, you're complaining about waiting for 20 minutes on Mother's Day? What did you expect?

2 - I have a hard time believing your food took an hour and a half after you ordered....even on Mother's Day. In my experience, people spend a lot more time dawdling over the menus that they think they do... and then exaggerate how long they have to wait for their food.

3 - If your food really took that long, why didn't you ask the waiter/manager what was going on? No way would I just sit there for an hour and a half.

We had a name for Sundays and holidays at the restaurant: Amatuer night.

I love the people that would stroll in at 7 p.m. on Valentine's Day and complain about the two hour wait. Duh.

Or the people that come in with the party of 20 on Mother's Day, Father's Day, or some other prime time-- no call ahead, no planning whatsoever, and we'd be holding tables open to eventually slap together to accomodate their party, other people would have to wait longer, they weren't happy, but the idiots in the large party would "check the wait" every 5 minutes with the host.

People ALWAYS over-estimate how long the wait is, how long their food is taking, and so on-- and it's easy to do. Some time when you have a few minutes-- literally 2 minutes, set the timer on your stove or microwave for 2 minutes, start it, and go sit down with everything off- no tv, no computer, no phone, no radio, etc. and do not say a word or get up or move for two minutes. It seems like a long time.

Mothers Day is the busiest day of the restaurant year- bar none. As a server, I was thankful people were willing to endure it, but God help me I will NEVER go out to eat on Mother's Day. MAYBE some day when I have more money than I know what to do with, I'll take my wife out to a brunch at a private club, or The Breakers or something, but casual dining on a holiday? NEVER. Hell, we don't even go out to eat on Saturday. I'm a Sunday-Thursday diner.

[ouchica]

I guess I should have explained better. We weren't bothered by the wait time at all. 20 minutes is no big deal especially for mother's day. I did actually check my watch when they said there would be a wait time so I know exactly when we went in. When we finally got seated we did notice there weren't that many people there considering it is a new restaurant on our side of town. When I noticed the waiter took forever between coming to our table and leaving I did ask him several times what the hold up was and he said he was busy but I would assume so were the other waiters. I had to repeat several orders more than once after he initially took them. He also asked several times what we were drinking before actually bringing the drinks. All in all by the time we were all completely done eating and I saw the time stamp on the ticket and verified on the watch it took us a 2 hrs from beginning of of when we sat down to when we finally completed our dinner.

I am the kind of person I eat and leave cause I don't want to hold up a table when that is how the waiter makes his/her money. I have never had a problem with wait times at all. I also have had waiters tell me if there is a hold up right away without me having to ask several times throughout the experience. This wasn't my first time eating out and I have worked in food service when I was in high school so it wasn't like I was rude, over estimating or exaggerating or an amateur. My only issue was not explaining it clearly

[AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP]

Out of curiosity- how many in your party?

[ouchica]

There were 5 of us in the party so we didn't have too many people. I should have known we were in for an adventure when the waiter kept having to ask what our drinks and orders were . Either way I won't be going back there again. It was just experience once and say yeah I have been there.

[Deleted]

May 27, 2011 20:12:53 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

I tip 15% if the service is good. If there is a problem, it depends on what the problem is. Major problem at the Outback of cold french onion soup that they wouldn't comp resulted in no tip and I will never go back to that location.

I go to Village Inn for breakfast and see all these elderly people leave $1 for a table to 2 or 4 people. My dad does the same thing. He's 87. I try to hang behind and leave the tip. He's only caught me once.

I know the manager and servers at my local Village Inn. If I ever have a problem there, they will know about it immediately.

I think it is fun, you think of yourself as a good tipper. Maybe compared to your dad, but now the norm for a good tip is 20% because the servers have to tip out.

[stats45]

I'm much more likely to say something about the food than service, unless the service is just terrible. If the food comes out cold due to the waitstaff or the kitchen, it is going back either way, so I don't try to figure it out.

Most chain restaurants lose me for 'over-service' and extremely quick food times as much as for mediocre food. I like to sit down and have a nice conversation, relax a bit. I hate feeling like I'm in a race to finish a salad or appetizer before the entree comes.

I also recognize that probably puts me out of the norm, so I don't hold that against a waiter.

[TheOtherMe]

May 28, 2011 14:34:54 GMT -5 @gin1984 said:

May 27, 2011 20:12:53 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

I tip 15% if the service is good. If there is a problem, it depends on what the problem is. Major problem at the Outback of cold french onion soup that they wouldn't comp resulted in no tip and I will never go back to that location.

I go to Village Inn for breakfast and see all these elderly people leave $1 for a table to 2 or 4 people. My dad does the same thing. He's 87. I try to hang behind and leave the tip. He's only caught me once.

I know the manager and servers at my local Village Inn. If I ever have a problem there, they will know about it immediately.

I think it is fun, you think of yourself as a good tipper. Maybe compared to your dad, but now the norm for a good tip is 20% because the servers have to tip out.

I tip what I think the service is worth. I have never, ever had service worth 20%. Even at a restaurant where the tip was added on to the bill, it was 18%, not 20%. I have known about tip outs. My first roommate was a hostess at IHOP back in the late 70's. Her tips were all from tip outs. She was reporting more tips on her tip report than other employers.

I worked at the IRS. I know cash tips don't always get reported. I will never see 20% as my norm because all income should be taxed and it isn't. It's as simple as that for me.

A good tip is in the eyes of the beholder. The servers at Village Inn think of me as a good tipper because I am not one of their senior citizens who leaves $1 for a table of 2 or 4 people. I see that every time I am there.

Actually, I like the European way where you don't tip. It shouldn't be up to me to pay the servers their salary. And, yes, I was a waitress in high school and watched my mother bring home tips.

[Deleted]

May 28, 2011 17:36:01 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

May 28, 2011 14:34:54 GMT -5 @gin1984 said:

I think it is fun, you think of yourself as a good tipper. Maybe compared to your dad, but now the norm for a good tip is 20% because the servers have to tip out.

I tip what I think the service is worth. I have never, ever had service worth 20%. Even at a restaurant where the tip was added on to the bill, it was 18%, not 20%. I have known about tip outs. My first roommate was a hostess at IHOP back in the late 70's. Her tips were all from tip outs. She was reporting more tips on her tip report than other employers.
I worked at the IRS. I know cash tips don't always get reported. I will never see 20% as my norm because all income should e taxed and it isn't. It's as simple as that for me.
A good tip is in the eyes of the beholder. The servers at Village Inn think of me as a good tipper because I am not one of their senior citizens who leaves $1 for a table of 2 or 4 people. I see that every time I am there.

Actually, I like the European way where you don't tip. It shouldn't be up to me to pay the servers their salary. And, yes, I was a waitress in high school and watched my mother bring home tips.

You may feel this way and it is your choice how to tip, however, to the definition of a good tipper in US is not 15%. Therefore when you call yourself a good tipper and tip 15%, I find it amusing. And "Village Inn" does not sound like a good restaurant, so your servers probably are older or very new in the business because they are willing to get those tips.

[AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP]

May 28, 2011 17:36:01 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

May 28, 2011 14:34:54 GMT -5 @gin1984 said:

I think it is fun, you think of yourself as a good tipper. Maybe compared to your dad, but now the norm for a good tip is 20% because the servers have to tip out.

I tip what I think the service is worth. I have never, ever had service worth 20%. Even at a restaurant where the tip was added on to the bill, it was 18%, not 20%. I have known about tip outs. My first roommate was a hostess at IHOP back in the late 70's. Her tips were all from tip outs. She was reporting more tips on her tip report than other employers.

I worked at the IRS. I know cash tips don't always get reported. I will never see 20% as my norm because all income should be taxed and it isn't. It's as simple as that for me.

A good tip is in the eyes of the beholder. The servers at Village Inn think of me as a good tipper because I am not one of their senior citizens who leaves $1 for a table of 2 or 4 people. I see that every time I am there.

Actually, I like the European way where you don't tip. It shouldn't be up to me to pay the servers their salary. And, yes, I was a waitress in high school and watched my mother bring home tips.

Of all the excuses for not tipping X%, my personal favorite is "volunteer independent agent for the IRS" in charge of making sure hospitality workers pay their taxes.

In reality, for the vast majority of servers the only thing underreporting of income does is effect withholding. Vast majority are going to get most or all of their withholding back.

[hoops902]

"In reality, for the vast majority of servers the only thing underreporting of income does is effect withholding. Vast majority are going to get most or all of their withholding back. "

Of course they're going to get most or all of their withholding back, they're massively underclaiming income. Do you have any idea how many servers do so as a 2nd job so that they would not be applying their personal exemptions against that income? That's to say nothing of all the other "perks" those who claim incredibly low incomes receive.

[hoops902]

"I can understand how customers can get upset over poor service, and with some servers I think this is justified, but I ask you all to put yourselves in your server's shoes and ask, "Could I do this job any better?" Trust me. It's not as easy as it looks. "

The problem I have with your logic is that you are supposed to be a professional server. I'm sure it's not as easy as it looks, that's still no excuse though. If a guy doing my tattoo jacks the entire thing up am I supposed to overlook it simply because I couldn't do his job any better? What about an airline pilot who crashes? I probably couldn't do that job better. "Could I do this job any better?" is a legit question when someone is volunteering a favor for you for a task in which they are not trained, it's not a legitimate question when someone is expecting payment based on their chosen job. I don't know the first thing about car repair, if the mechanic ruins my engine he doesn't get off the hook simply because I don't know how to do his job!

[marshabar1]

I loved waitressing! Funnest job ever for me. I always spoke to the ladies first and served them first, polite to the men but never flirtatious. Always made great tips that way. Fancy place, fancy service, fancy people, very fun. Great friendships and nice lifestyle. I missed it when I got married and got into more serious things.

The owner and chefs were Swiss. There was one chef who was a total azzhat but we ended up great friends. I know it's a hard business and destructive to some but for me it was total fun.

[AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP]

May 29, 2011 21:21:21 GMT -5 hoops902 said:

"In reality, for the vast majority of servers the only thing underreporting of income does is effect withholding. Vast majority are going to get most or all of their withholding back. "

Of course they're going to get most or all of their withholding back, they're massively underclaiming income. Do you have any idea how many servers do so as a 2nd job so that they would not be applying their personal exemptions against that income? That's to say nothing of all the other "perks" those who claim incredibly low incomes receive.

I'm counting even reporting ALL their income. Unless you're fine dining, I suppose. But these kids you see at casual dining restaurants are making $12K to $15K a year.

[AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP]

...but my point still stands: It's not my job to worry about whether my waiter claims all their income or pays all the income tax they owe. I don't have a shirt in that color brown.

[AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP]

May 29, 2011 21:50:01 GMT -5 hoops902 said:

"I can understand how customers can get upset over poor service, and with some servers I think this is justified, but I ask you all to put yourselves in your server's shoes and ask, "Could I do this job any better?" Trust me. It's not as easy as it looks. "

The problem I have with your logic is that you are supposed to be a professional server. I'm sure it's not as easy as it looks, that's still no excuse though. If a guy doing my tattoo jacks the entire thing up am I supposed to overlook it simply because I couldn't do his job any better? What about an airline pilot who crashes? I probably couldn't do that job better. "Could I do this job any better?" is a legit question when someone is volunteering a favor for you for a task in which they are not trained, it's not a legitimate question when someone is expecting payment based on their chosen job. I don't know the first thing about car repair, if the mechanic ruins my engine he doesn't get off the hook simply because I don't know how to do his job!

Yeah- I tend to agree. Maybe I couldn't do your job better, but then- that's why it's your job, not mine. If you can't cut it, for whatever reason, then you're not going to make as much money.

That's what I like about the NON-European way of tipping: Imagine a world where your server could suck, be rude, be disrespectful, and you had to eat it and pay him anyway.

In the US, you pay for service what you believe the service is worth starting with a customary 15% and moving up or down depending.

[hoops902]

May 31, 2011 13:30:17 GMT -5 AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP said:

May 29, 2011 21:21:21 GMT -5 hoops902 said:

"In reality, for the vast majority of servers the only thing underreporting of income does is effect withholding. Vast majority are going to get most or all of their withholding back. "

Of course they're going to get most or all of their withholding back, they're massively underclaiming income. Do you have any idea how many servers do so as a 2nd job so that they would not be applying their personal exemptions against that income? That's to say nothing of all the other "perks" those who claim incredibly low incomes receive.

I'm counting even reporting ALL their income. Unless you're fine dining, I suppose. But these kids you see at casual dining restaurants are making $12K to $15K a year.

I agree if that was your only job. There are lots of people out there for who waiting tables is a 2nd job, which means they might not make much, but they'd basically be taxed on all of it.

I do agree with you though that "they won't report it" is a lousy reason to not tip or tip low.

[zibazinski]

Married men get better tips? I have never eaten in a restaurant where I was served by a married man. I tip older workers, male and female, VERY well because the job is hard and they are old and GOD knows if they could get any other decent job, they'd do it so they are stuck doing what they are doing and I tip the young well, college age as they need it for school.

[TheOtherMe]

May 29, 2011 21:21:21 GMT -5 hoops902 said:

"In reality, for the vast majority of servers the only thing underreporting of income does is effect withholding. Vast majority are going to get most or all of their withholding back. "

Of course they're going to get most or all of their withholding back, they're massively underclaiming income. Do you have any idea how many servers do so as a 2nd job so that they would not be applying their personal exemptions against that income? That's to say nothing of all the other "perks" those who claim incredibly low incomes receive.

Exactly and I am talking about people who only work as waitresses or waiters for a living. If you look at what they spend in a year, it can be ridiculous.

If they underreport their income, they often get the Earned Income Credit, which could actually be fraud. You are paying for that out of your taxes.

I truly feel it is not up to me to determine the salary of service people. They don't determine mine.

I don't expect you to agree with my opinion. Spending 25 years auditing tax returns does make you somewhat cynical. I often had to remind myself that only 1-2% of tax returns get audited, which means the other returns looked fine. I wasn't seeing those.