finnime
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Be kind. Everyone you meet is fighting a great battle.
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Post by finnime on Jan 24, 2020 22:06:18 GMT -5
Dh has been in surgery a couple hours with likely a couple left to go. The whole thing is surreal. I've slept maybe 3 hours since I work up for work at 5 am on thurs. He likely ends up in ICU overnight where I'm hoping they keep his pain under control so we can both get some sleep. And what i wouldn't give for a shower right now lol. Sorry you're having to deal with this. Best wishes for your DH, and for you. Hope you can get some sleep.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Jan 25, 2020 0:10:51 GMT -5
Letting children have independence with possible failure is horrible. I could easily be an alcoholic by the time E graduates.
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debthaven
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Post by debthaven on Jan 25, 2020 4:10:56 GMT -5
Sending you both hugs Azucena.
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tcu2003
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Post by tcu2003 on Jan 25, 2020 8:15:34 GMT -5
Hugs, azucena. How is he doing this morning? Did you manage to get some sleep?
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Jan 25, 2020 8:43:50 GMT -5
Dh has been in surgery a couple hours with likely a couple left to go. The whole thing is surreal. I've slept maybe 3 hours since I work up for work at 5 am on thurs. He likely ends up in ICU overnight where I'm hoping they keep his pain under control so we can both get some sleep. And what i wouldn't give for a shower right now lol.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 25, 2020 10:38:52 GMT -5
Dh has been in surgery a couple hours with likely a couple left to go. The whole thing is surreal. I've slept maybe 3 hours since I work up for work at 5 am on thurs. He likely ends up in ICU overnight where I'm hoping they keep his pain under control so we can both get some sleep. And what i wouldn't give for a shower right now lol. Hoping all went well for you both last night.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 25, 2020 10:40:53 GMT -5
Letting children have independence with possible failure is horrible. I could easily be an alcoholic by the time E graduates. I feel like a complete failure at this sometimes.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Jan 25, 2020 21:33:25 GMT -5
And C has lice. I'm definitely in a fml funk. Thank God we didn't find anything moving but plenty of nits so they had to come from some where. I shampooed him, combed, and doused him in tea tree oil. The shampoo is soaking into E's hair now. Combing through her hair will likely be the end of me. Bedding is in the washer. I didn't find anything in her hair but I can't not treat her hair and be able to sleep. Will have to do my head next.
I'll wash his hoodies on hot. Not sure about the rest of our clothes? Nothing I own will fit if it's washed on hot but I'd rather go naked than ever do this again. Thinking I'll try to find a lice lady to do the recheck in a week.
At work We're supposed to be coming up with our intention word for the year. My boss' is joy. My sales guys is efficient. The closest I could come up with is dumpster fire and it feels prophetic.
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finnime
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Be kind. Everyone you meet is fighting a great battle.
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Post by finnime on Jan 25, 2020 21:42:54 GMT -5
Letting children have independence with possible failure is horrible. I could easily be an alcoholic by the time E graduates. I feel like a complete failure at this sometimes. DD is 33 and DS, 25, and I still have trouble with this. There are so many times I want to be supportive but can see that train barreling down the tracks right at them. Then there's the trouble you didn't see coming. I recommend controlled deep breathing and a lot of prayer. Drinks help, too.
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Pants
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Post by Pants on Jan 25, 2020 22:16:23 GMT -5
And C has lice. I'm definitely in a fml funk. Thank God we didn't find anything moving but plenty of nits so they had to come from some where. I shampooed him, combed, and doused him in tea tree oil. The shampoo is soaking into E's hair now. Combing through her hair will likely be the end of me. Bedding is in the washer. I didn't find anything in her hair but I can't not treat her hair and be able to sleep. Will have to do my head next. I'll wash his hoodies on hot. Not sure about the rest of our clothes? Nothing I own will fit if it's washed on hot but I'd rather go naked than ever do this again. Thinking I'll try to find a lice lady to do the recheck in a week. At work We're supposed to be coming up with our intention word for the year. My boss' is joy. My sales guys is efficient. The closest I could come up with is dumpster fire and it feels prophetic. Your intention word should be intentional.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 25, 2020 22:39:46 GMT -5
I feel like a complete failure at this sometimes. DD is 33 and DS, 25, and I still have trouble with this. There are so many times I want to be supportive but can see that train barreling down the tracks right at them. Then there's the trouble you didn't see coming. I recommend controlled deep breathing and a lot of prayer. Drinks help, too. DS is 58 and DD is 55, and I still have trouble with this, too. Breathing...in through the nose, out through the mouth.
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azucena
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Post by azucena on Jan 25, 2020 23:24:22 GMT -5
We both slept decently for being in a hospital. He's on a ventilator in icu which is making it extra tough for me since I watched my dad die in similar circumstances two years ago. So I'm here but hiding in the waiting room.
They lowered the meds enough for him to wake up and answer the nurses yes no questions including that hes not in pain.
When I came in he got agitated when I couldnt understand what he wanted. So I went back to the waiting room and am praying for a quiet night.
This is feeling like a recurring nightmare. And its extra sucky because I need to here with him so my kids are getting shortchanged. Saw them for an hour today when I showered and passed them from my friends house to ours with my mom tonight.
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azucena
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Post by azucena on Jan 25, 2020 23:30:07 GMT -5
Not sure if I mentioned that the surgeon found his intestine had twisted and was dying so he did a bowel resection. He left the ostomy in the same spot (good) but had to create a new one and admitted that's it's going to be tough to manage since his intestines were so swollen. To eventually fix it means another surgery but it would be more minor.
In another development surgeon suggested dh might have crohns instead of ulcerative colitis which is another kick while we are down. Diagnosis depends on sight and symptoms so its tricky. Crohns causes inflammation throughout the body instead of just intestines. Likely means maintenance meds for life.
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cktc
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Post by cktc on Jan 25, 2020 23:58:32 GMT -5
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jan 26, 2020 0:06:49 GMT -5
And C has lice. I'm definitely in a fml funk. Thank God we didn't find anything moving but plenty of nits so they had to come from some where. I shampooed him, combed, and doused him in tea tree oil. The shampoo is soaking into E's hair now. Combing through her hair will likely be the end of me. Bedding is in the washer. I didn't find anything in her hair but I can't not treat her hair and be able to sleep. Will have to do my head next. I'll wash his hoodies on hot. Not sure about the rest of our clothes? Nothing I own will fit if it's washed on hot but I'd rather go naked than ever do this again. Thinking I'll try to find a lice lady to do the recheck in a week. At work We're supposed to be coming up with our intention word for the year. My boss' is joy. My sales guys is efficient. The closest I could come up with is dumpster fire and it feels prophetic. Make sure to check till you got the queen. She'll be the biggest and most horrific. Then check again in two weeks. That's how long it takes eggs to hatch. If you missed one it'll come out a queen and start all over. Seriously it's worth every penny to find a hired lice picker. The one we used will check everyone's head and treats again at no cost if she misses one. Stopped a two month nightmare between Abby, Gwen and my hair.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Jan 26, 2020 0:12:37 GMT -5
Not sure if I mentioned that the surgeon found his intestine had twisted and was dying so he did a bowel resection. He left the ostomy in the same spot (good) but had to create a new one and admitted that's it's going to be tough to manage since his intestines were so swollen. To eventually fix it means another surgery but it would be more minor. In another development surgeon suggested dh might have crohns instead of ulcerative colitis which is another kick while we are down. Diagnosis depends on sight and symptoms so its tricky. Crohns causes inflammation throughout the body instead of just intestines. Likely means maintenance meds for life. Hugs. I hate being too far away in times like this. My mom has Crohns and remicaid treatments means she has an almost normal life. But I know not everyone can tolerate it and she doesn't have an os.to.my. I hope he recovers soon and gets a good prognosis.
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Jan 26, 2020 2:37:20 GMT -5
I’m sorry you and DH are going through this. Big hugs azucena.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jan 26, 2020 7:44:29 GMT -5
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ners
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Post by ners on Jan 26, 2020 8:19:16 GMT -5
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Jan 26, 2020 8:55:05 GMT -5
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finnime
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Be kind. Everyone you meet is fighting a great battle.
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Post by finnime on Jan 26, 2020 9:57:07 GMT -5
Hoping for a quick recovery for your DH, azucena, and sending you prayers and hugs, for your girls, too. It's a tough, rough place to be in.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 26, 2020 10:05:51 GMT -5
azucena Thinking positive thoughts for you. Please post updates as you can.
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azucena
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Post by azucena on Jan 26, 2020 10:05:53 GMT -5
They are weaning down the sleepy drugs so he's awake. They turned off the vent and He is doing well. He is not happy about being restrained and we are playing a game of find the itch which I apparently suck at. I understand he is frustrated but if he acts up his BP goes up and wait period starts over. So I hear myself saying relax, calm down which clearly doesnt help so now I'm saying I know this sucks just a little longer and you can hoarsely yell at whomever you want.
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Jan 26, 2020 10:08:49 GMT -5
They are weaning down the sleepy drugs so he's awake. They turned off the vent and He is doing well. He is not happy about being restrained and we are playing a game of find the itch which I apparently suck at. I understand he is frustrated but if he acts up his BP goes up and wait period starts over. So I hear myself saying relax, calm down which clearly doesnt help so now I'm saying I know this sucks just a little longer and you can hoarsely yell at whomever you want. Can they take that restrains off now that he’s awake? Then he at least scratch his own itches (and help his BP not go up).
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azucena
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Post by azucena on Jan 26, 2020 10:24:23 GMT -5
They are weaning down the sleepy drugs so he's awake. They turned off the vent and He is doing well. He is not happy about being restrained and we are playing a game of find the itch which I apparently suck at. I understand he is frustrated but if he acts up his BP goes up and wait period starts over. So I hear myself saying relax, calm down which clearly doesnt help so now I'm saying I know this sucks just a little longer and you can hoarsely yell at whomever you want. Can they take that restrains off now that he’s awake? Then he at least scratch his own itches (and help his BP not go up). Nope because he might try to take out vent even if he promises not to. I might go get some coffee for a bit because this is hard to watch. Also, oversharing, it's one thing to sleep at the hospital when I was in my 20s less aches and pains. Now that I'm in my 40s hormonal night sweats have me wishing for a shower. Likely have to wait until this afternoon when my mom takes a turn here.
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azucena
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Post by azucena on Jan 26, 2020 14:50:47 GMT -5
Extubated and much happier
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tcu2003
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Post by tcu2003 on Jan 26, 2020 20:03:37 GMT -5
Thanks for the update, azucena. Giant hugs to you. I’m glad he’s extubated now. Here’s hoping he continues to recover well and he’s discharged sooner rather than later.
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azucena
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Post by azucena on Jan 27, 2020 2:12:42 GMT -5
Insomnia. Waiting for sleepy time tea to kick in. Sleeping in my bed for the first time in 3 nights. Slept 8 to 1230 so far, girls in bed with me. When I woke up I couldnt find dd7. Didnt panic, her room, sisters, and couch were empty. Back to my room - shes in the walk in closet. Have I mentioned that shes my weird kid? Unusual sleeping places are kinda her thing. Friend was keeping her for me one night and texted concerned that dd was insisting on sleeping on her hardwood floor. Eh, whatever. Previous places at home include her closet, under the bed, bathroom floor, bathtub, a full 6 months on her floor. And she isnt sleep walking - these are all pre-bedtime choices and ive learned to pick my battles with this kiddo particularly about sleep.
Dr said 5 to 7 days starting from sat before released. 4 to 6 weeks recovering at home. Starting fmla paperwork for both of tomorrow. Hmm wonder if he ST disability coverage - doubt it.
Fortunately we will be okay moneywise without pay - good ymam savings for the win!
Oh, and dd7 cant remember bowel resection so she keeps saying daddy had a ballet reception.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 27, 2020 6:35:53 GMT -5
azucena This is the first thing I looked for this morning. I'm glad to hear he's doing better and that you're going to get some sleep in a real bed. So far so good! Ballet reception
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on Jan 27, 2020 9:02:51 GMT -5
So debate for your ladies. To relieve stress and get my mind off stuff I've been browsing tattoos because I'd like to get one more to round out the pattern on my arms. I found one of a female budha which I am in love with. DH says absolutely not because the figure is naked. He mansplained to me that the naked female body on my arm is inappropriate and "I am aware that tattoos are permenant right?" (no really I only have three of them already). I pointed out plenty of men have naked women tattooed all over them and nobody says squat. It's not like we're talking a porn spread. The legs are closed, all you can see are breasts. Whoopee. I see bigger more offensive titties every time several male neighbors take off their shirts to mow the lawn. It'd be the same size as my others and on my upper arm so I can cover it up if I needed to. His attitude makes me want it even more. The piece is art. I get really pissed when people treat the female body like it's something gross that needs to be hidden and that I must be "modest". I've decided I want a tattoo that represents my feminist side so now I want this tattoo even more to drive the point home. So setting aside personal opinion on tattoos themselves, anyone else find the idea of a female body tattoo on an actual female body "offensive?" No. Again, he can fuck right off and keep fucking off. Damn it, I'm a few days late and swamp beat me to it.
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