taz157
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Post by taz157 on Jun 11, 2024 20:07:17 GMT -5
For those that are curious on the saga with a co-worker at my job. That co-worker was let go today. You would think having a PIP, you would show your best effort with your work. Let’s just say, she didn’t and the higher ups saw some of the work this time. They left her go at the end of the day.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jun 11, 2024 20:11:06 GMT -5
The katy perry beverage is not for me. As DD1 put it, it tastes like a candle.
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jun 11, 2024 20:16:49 GMT -5
In my session today, she asked me how I feel about Mister’s obvious reluctance to do anything to address his daughters’ bad behavior and disrespect (those are my words, not hers). She said that his reluctance was why she tried to explain to him that consequences can help correct bad behavior, if there are no consequences, there is no reason for a person to stop negative behavior. I told her that in my mind, what is most important to me now, is that their bad behavior no longer disrupts my household and my home with a bunch of drama and chaos. I said that that means that I will be more assertive about certain things, and address them directly as needed. If they start screaming and yelling, like they do with their Dad, will ask them to stop. If they can’t stop, and continue yelling and screaming, I will ask them to leave until they can get themselves under control. If they refuse to stop and refuse to leave, I will call the police to help them leave. Even if they do all of that and it is directed toward Mister and not me, I will ask them to stop and take a time out to get themselves together. If they ignore my requests on that , I will ask them to leave. If they ignore/refuse those requests, and Mister can’t get them to calm down, I will call the police. I understand that that may sound harsh, but I MUST have peace in my home. I can deal with “normal” disagreements and even arguments that might get a little heated, but the stuff they have done is way beyond that, and I’m done. NO! Absolutely, 100% NO, NO, NO! There is No harshness here!. When my kids were little and they got out of control I send them to their room until they could behave like civilized people again. A favorite family story is how then 6yo DS2 got send to his room and when he came out I asked him if he was ready to behave himself and the little turd said no. So I send him back. Rinse and repeat. By his fourth reappearance the answer changed to yes - and he was calmed down. Tell me how, if a 6yo can learn this, a young adult can't? Now I was pushover as a mom (according to my family, including my kids) but the few rules I had better be followed as this pushover was also very consistent and persistent. No budging. If they don't behave they can bloody well leave and stay gone until they will behave. Yeah, DS tried me when he was a teenager. He’d had some growth spurts, where it seemed like just overnight, he was a lot taller than me. One evening I was sitting in the chair at my computer desk in the den, fussing at him about something I don’t remember. Next thing I knew, he was standing over me, with his fists balled up at his side, clearly very angry. I jumped out of the chair, which meant we were nose to nose since he was so close to me already. I told him that he really didn’t want to tangle with me like that, because we need to act like mother and son, and not strangers in the streets, because I’m not trying to have to fight my own child…. I’m from the hood and I don’t fight fair. And I said, I suggest you take your ass to your bedroom and get your shit together, and come back and see me after you calm down. He had enough respect for me to do what I suggested, and we talked again later that evening. The *real* me came out in that moment because he was not acting like *my* child, and I felt like he was posing a physical threat, and I needed to nip that shit in the bud, and let him know I don’t play those games. So my instincts took over and I handled it the way I knew how, by standing up to him, but also giving him an “out” to back down, retreat and regroup, instead of escalating. Everything about him towering over me and his body language, was very bad, and could’ve gone terribly wrong. But I let him know right then and there that he couldn’t intimidate me even though he was bigger than me, and I was not tolerating that kind of behavior from him. He never did anything like that again. We have fussed and argued many times since then, but nothing even close to that has ever happened ever again.
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ners
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Post by ners on Jun 11, 2024 20:28:34 GMT -5
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Pink Cashmere
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Post by Pink Cashmere on Jun 11, 2024 20:34:46 GMT -5
big hugs, Pink. I love that you're committed to setting boundaries to make your home YOURS again. Empress, I'm going to mess with the photo sites I still have accounts with in the am. I haven't posted pics here in awhile. hopefully I can make it work. <crosses fingers> andi - thank you for taking over my kitchen this weekend. I just wandered inside a solid two hours after reheating pork chile for dinner and my kitchen still smells amazing. I'll just reiterate my request that you write down what you do the next time you make pozole, please and thank you. Living in this house has been problematic since a couple of months after we moved in. So I’m not really making it my home again, I’m actually finally making it my home for real now. That’s okay too though. While I am always willing to learn from the past and mistakes I’ve made, I feel like it is also very important to focus on what I need to do do now….. moving forward…… today and tomorrow.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Jun 11, 2024 21:28:48 GMT -5
Honestly, that was the best part of the house. You should see it at night!
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Jun 11, 2024 21:32:13 GMT -5
I like how the step stool in the kitchen disappears then reappears. I didn't notice that. Now that you guys are picking them all apart (which I love) I'm realizing that this is probably a "self flip" which IMO is worse than a professional flip.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Jun 11, 2024 21:54:07 GMT -5
NO! Absolutely, 100% NO, NO, NO! There is No harshness here!. When my kids were little and they got out of control I send them to their room until they could behave like civilized people again. A favorite family story is how then 6yo DS2 got send to his room and when he came out I asked him if he was ready to behave himself and the little turd said no. So I send him back. Rinse and repeat. By his fourth reappearance the answer changed to yes - and he was calmed down. Tell me how, if a 6yo can learn this, a young adult can't? Now I was pushover as a mom (according to my family, including my kids) but the few rules I had better be followed as this pushover was also very consistent and persistent. No budging. If they don't behave they can bloody well leave and stay gone until they will behave. Yeah, DS tried me when he was a teenager. He’d had some growth spurts, where it seemed like just overnight, he was a lot taller than me. One evening I was sitting in the chair at my computer desk in the den, fussing at him about something I don’t remember. Next thing I knew, he was standing over me, with his fists balled up at his side, clearly very angry. I jumped out of the chair, which meant we were nose to nose since he was so close to me already. I told him that he really didn’t want to tangle with me like that, because we need to act like mother and son, and not strangers in the streets, because I’m not trying to have to fight my own child…. I’m from the hood and I don’t fight fair. And I said, I suggest you take your ass to your bedroom and get your shit together, and come back and see me after you calm down. He had enough respect for me to do what I suggested, and we talked again later that evening. The *real* me came out in that moment because he was not acting like *my* child, and I felt like he was posing a physical threat, and I needed to nip that shit in the bud, and let him know I don’t play those games. So my instincts took over and I handled it the way I knew how, by standing up to him, but also giving him an “out” to back down, retreat and regroup, instead of escalating. Everything about him towering over me and his body language, was very bad, and could’ve gone terribly wrong. But I let him know right then and there that he couldn’t intimidate me even though he was bigger than me, and I was not tolerating that kind of behavior from him. He never did anything like that again. We have fussed and argued many times since then, but nothing even close to that has ever happened ever again. Same girl. My girls are the same size as me but I will snatch them up in a hot second if needed. I'm one of the nicest people that you'll ever meet and have the biggest heart. I will also go from sweet to hood in about .5 seconds and I'm not afraid of anyone. You may walk over, but you'll limp back. The girls and I have a really good relationship because there are boundaries. We fuss at each other, but at the end of the day I'm their mother and I deserve respect. Mister really needs them with his kids. Everyone does.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Jun 11, 2024 22:00:04 GMT -5
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jun 11, 2024 22:11:34 GMT -5
I like this one better; but the layout of the kitchen bothers me. I'd want to know why it is sold as is.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jun 11, 2024 22:15:11 GMT -5
I like how the step stool in the kitchen disappears then reappears. I didn't notice that. Now that you guys are picking them all apart (which I love) I'm realizing that this is probably a "self flip" which IMO is worse than a professional flip. There was a horrible patch job on sheet rock in photo 32. Saw it when you first posted it but was hesitate to say anything. Figured I was being to picky
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Jun 11, 2024 22:26:30 GMT -5
I like this one. I'm questioning why the floor in the basement looks weird. Hope they're not hiding water damage. The only thing I'd change, is I'd like more counter space. I need "elbow room" when I work in my kitchen. In fact, with DD helping me at any family gathering, there's no such thing as too much counter space.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Jun 12, 2024 2:46:01 GMT -5
Good morning, discerning and decisive invisipeeps, evaluating houses and defining plans of action for boundary violations. Welcome to Wednesday. I hope your day offers good news that lightens your burdens and some salty snacks for recreation, maybe popcorn or Chex mix. We are definitely in early summer here. Cooler in the dawn period, up to the 70's during the day, and partly cloudy. I planted caladium bulbs 2.5 or 3 weeks ago and have been checking them for sprouting, but nada. They really need warmer weather to get going. Hoping to see something this week or maybe next. They'll add a nice burst of color to the front of the house which will be important when the lilies pass by. I did weed one front garden yesterday. One, a smaller one, to go. This morning I have another mammogram and ultrasound to follow. THe first mammo found that I have "dense" breast tissue and a follow up is indicated. So do 40+% of all women, so I'm not distressed about it, just vaguely annoyed. And I have a virtual doctor's appointment later on. This will be a medical day. References are being contacted by DD's prospective employer. That's a good sign. One foot in front of the other. Keep going. Here is the pre-dawn show yesterday, complete with tiny dinosaurs:
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countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on Jun 12, 2024 3:51:05 GMT -5
I found a place I LOVE. Even has a big garage it says. I think it would work for both of us. Will go see it tomorrow, if i can. Have to check if they will allow DD and 2 pets. Yep its leased land but the modular is new enough if we had to move it we could, but would sure cost. 4228 Illahee Lane SW, Tumwater, Wa 98512
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Jun 12, 2024 3:55:55 GMT -5
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ners
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Post by ners on Jun 12, 2024 5:47:26 GMT -5
Morning all. Going to be a long day not much sleep again. Bring on the coffee.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Jun 12, 2024 6:01:22 GMT -5
I like this one better; but the layout of the kitchen bothers me. I'd want to know why it is sold as is. I didn't notice that. I'm gonna pass then. Thanks.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Jun 12, 2024 6:02:57 GMT -5
I didn't notice that. Now that you guys are picking them all apart (which I love) I'm realizing that this is probably a "self flip" which IMO is worse than a professional flip. There was a horrible patch job on sheet rock in photo 32. Saw it when you first posted it but was hesitate to say anything. Figured I was being to picky I want picky! Tear them apart!
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Jun 12, 2024 6:51:28 GMT -5
I found a place I LOVE. Even has a big garage it says. I think it would work for both of us. Will go see it tomorrow, if i can. Have to check if they will allow DD and 2 pets. Yep its leased land but the modular is new enough if we had to move it we could, but would sure cost. 4228 Illahee Lane SW, Tumwater, Wa 98512 VERY NICE! The only flaw I could see in the pictures is a bit of damage to the kitchen cabinets under the sink. I'm not sure about the red walls, but paint is an easy fix. Overall, I love it! How far would you be from your son's place?
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minnesotapaintlady
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Post by minnesotapaintlady on Jun 12, 2024 7:14:26 GMT -5
I found a place I LOVE. Even has a big garage it says. I think it would work for both of us. Will go see it tomorrow, if i can. Have to check if they will allow DD and 2 pets. Yep its leased land but the modular is new enough if we had to move it we could, but would sure cost. 4228 Illahee Lane SW, Tumwater, Wa 98512 The house is nice, but I'd make sure you're ok with paying the lot rent forever, because that place doesn't look remotely easy to move. Looks pretty permanently set to me and not a trailer.
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daisylu
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Post by daisylu on Jun 12, 2024 7:23:30 GMT -5
Saw a PA at the orthopedic yesterday, which was expected as the only test they could do right away was x-ray. It did show that the patella is too close to the knee joint, indicating either a reduction or tear in cartilage - neither of which can be determined without an MRI. Gave me a cortisone shot (for pain, plus to work with insurance company on approval for MRI) and instructions for the next couple of weeks. Return 7/15 for update and to schedule MRI. After that I will be turned over to doctor. I will see the same doctor that I saw for my hip a few years ago. My first meeting with him back then he asked "how bad do you want to have surgery?". Older doc, probably weeding out people who just want a reason to not work, but I appreciated that because there was no way that I wanted to have hip surgery before I was 45YO. Prescribed physical therapy which worked. I will likely have to have that surgery at some point but I would like to put it off as long as possible. I would be fine he suggests physical therapy for the knee while waiting on MRI.
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daisylu
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Post by daisylu on Jun 12, 2024 7:32:13 GMT -5
Thanks for the birthday wishes and cakes!
DS brought me a card with a sunflower (one of my favorite flowers) on the front and wrote a nice note inside about how much he loves me. That meant more to me than anyone could ever know. It shows that he knows me and spent time picking it out, and he struggles with emotions so the note meant the world to me.
I was able to eat 2 bites of an Arby's roast beef sandwich and a mozzarella stick in order to take medicine last night.
I still have to deal with the BS with DH, which will likely be later today after I take him to the doc to get his stitches out. I still care enough to be there to ask the important questions, though I do feel myself "checking out". It is going to be up to him and how he responds to what I have to say about him weaponizing my feelings against me in order to deflect a conversation that he did not want to have about himself. That will define how I proceed.
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minnesotapaintlady
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Post by minnesotapaintlady on Jun 12, 2024 7:35:16 GMT -5
That one is a no for me. Most of it is wood siding that would have to be stained often, corner lot so lots of sidewalk to shovel, multiple ancient window air conditioners instead of central air and while I know some of it is all the crap, the backyard looks sort of trashy with cobbled together fences right on top of neighbors with other kind of crappy looking back yards. The sold "as-is" is a red flag as well. Disclaimer: These are things that would bother ME, you might prefer this to a huge back yard far from neighbors that needed a lot of mowing.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jun 12, 2024 7:46:49 GMT -5
We sold my great uncle's house as is. There wasn't anything wrong with the house structurally it just hadn't been updated since the late 70s.
I am not exaggerating the house was so unchanged that when I walked in for the first time in decades I had a panic attack because it was like walking back in time to Christmas when I was a kid. I expected to see my great grandmother's giant oxygen tank in the office.
My dad wasn't going to invest large amounts of time and his own money (GU had none) for house that we weren't going to see a single penny of.
My grandmother's house my dad did a bit more work on because he got half the proceeds but not nearly as much as he would have for a house we got 100% of the profits from.
Plus we were on major time crunches for both houses because Medicaid and the nursing home wanted the $$$. We weren't going to risk being taken to court as we spent time doing all the things the realtor listed out would make the homes more attractive.
Grandma's house went to someone who flipped it. GUs ended up going to a flipper as well.
Just commenting because there are reasons a house could be going "as is" that aren't sinister or hiding something.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Jun 12, 2024 8:10:48 GMT -5
I'm in a mood. The missy didn't sleep. I didn't sleep. I haven't touched a craft project for a few days.
I don't know why businesses *make* you give them your cell so they can harass you with texts.
Or are humans now so flaky that they don't show up for appointments, despite two emails and 2 text reminders in the span of 4 days?
Yes, I can now opt out. Which I will. But come on. I don't really need more things to do.
I have enough on my plate, thank you.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jun 12, 2024 8:25:10 GMT -5
I give them my landline which I haven't bothered to fix the connection in years. It's cheaper to bundle our internet and landline for $85 a month so I figured why not. It's become my throwaway. The only let the doctor's office and dental office text me. Both are pretty good about not texting more than 48 hours before the appointment and if I hit "Y" to confirm it stops. What is driving me nuts are the political texts. It's like trying to slay the hydra. Every time I block one five more pop up in its place.
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lurkyloo
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Post by lurkyloo on Jun 12, 2024 8:30:22 GMT -5
Good call. I understand this is usually either hacking a 2FA thing (less likely that your DGS has accounts to hack? except maybe itunes?) or setting up a google voice account for nefarious purposes. It’s a newish one to me and less immediately obviously scammy, but definitely a scam. I swear if people put as much efforts into their own endeavors as to trying to scam others… Glad your DD answered. Can she set the phone to ring through to voicemail if the caller isn’t in his contacts? She blocked the caller, but has gotten at least 3 more messages with from Apple, with codes to verify whatever somebody is trying to do, since my first post about it. I’m not sure what needs to be done at this point. I think she can either ignore it or contact Apple. I don’t suppose the text says what to do? Just noticed my fidelity has a new note on the 2FA text that if anyone asks for the number it’s a scam .
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jun 12, 2024 9:06:16 GMT -5
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chiver78
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Post by chiver78 on Jun 12, 2024 9:11:16 GMT -5
sanity check, please - if my tree grows up and over the property line, the other side may trim back as they see fit at their expense, if need be. yes? healthy tree at zero risk of falling over any time soon.
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soupandstew
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Post by soupandstew on Jun 12, 2024 9:22:09 GMT -5
sanity check, please - if my tree grows up and over the property line, the other side may trim back as they see fit at their expense, if need be. yes? healthy tree at zero risk of falling over any time soon. Yes in most jurisdictions I'm aware of. In Texas there is a caveat that, if their trimming cause death or substantial damage to the tree, they may be liable for cost of replacement.
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