azucena
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Post by azucena on Mar 31, 2021 6:50:24 GMT -5
SS benefits cannot change - I think you're still entitled to collect half his benefit if you were married at least 10 yrs. It's either half his or all of yours whichever is greater. There's your good news for the day - you win that point
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Mar 31, 2021 8:09:59 GMT -5
Have we reinforced the difference, and great importance, between the deed and the mortgage?
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tiana
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Post by tiana on Mar 31, 2021 9:03:10 GMT -5
SS benefits cannot change - I think you're still entitled to collect half his benefit if you were married at least 10 yrs. It's either half his or all of yours whichever is greater. There's your good news for the day - you win that point I am sorry I think it’s the wrong thread. I am not after his anything.
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tiana
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Post by tiana on Mar 31, 2021 9:09:51 GMT -5
Have we reinforced the difference, and great importance, between the deed and the mortgage? Yes dear I know what the mortgage is. I am paying it!
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Mar 31, 2021 9:55:14 GMT -5
Have we reinforced the difference, and great importance, between the deed and the mortgage? Yes dear I know what the mortgage is. I am paying it! Is he still on the mortgage documents? Because that matters.
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tallguy
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Post by tallguy on Mar 31, 2021 10:53:20 GMT -5
Have we reinforced the difference, and great importance, between the deed and the mortgage? Yes dear I know what the mortgage is. I am paying it! No judge is going to make him sign anything until you can get him off of the mortgage. In fact, if it were me and you tried to drag me into court over it it would probably cost you the house. "Your Honor, I have tried to be cooperative here. I am perfectly willing to sign away my interest in the house as long as I can be released from the mortgage, and will even forfeit my equity in the property to accomplish that. You know as well as I do that remaining on the mortgage for a house I no longer hold an ownership interest in is a terrible idea, and this court cannot and should not compel me to do so. She needs to refinance the house into her own name. I will cooperate with that process. She is apparently either unable or unwilling to do that. While I am willing to wait a certain amount of time, I would still like this to be over and have my finances separated from hers. Also, I have explained this to her numerous times and have only been berated and harangued for my trouble. Would you please, Your Honor, explain this to her again? Perhaps the authority of this court will make her understand. Further, I would ask for an order that gives her six months or a year to follow through and refinance the property so I can be freed of the obligation. Failing that, I would ask the court to force the sale of the house with a split of the equity so that this matter can be concluded and I can move on with my life. Thank you, Your Honor."
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tiana
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Post by tiana on Mar 31, 2021 11:48:17 GMT -5
Yes dear I know what the mortgage is. I am paying it! Is he still on the mortgage documents? Because that matters. Yea he is. However divorce decree said that I shall not hold him reliable for mortgage and pay remainder by myself.
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tiana
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Post by tiana on Mar 31, 2021 11:54:42 GMT -5
Yes dear I know what the mortgage is. I am paying it! No judge is going to make him sign anything until you can get him off of the mortgage. In fact, if it were me and you tried to drag me into court over it it would probably cost you the house. "Your Honor, I have tried to be cooperative here. I am perfectly willing to sign away my interest in the house as long as I can be released from the mortgage, and will even forfeit my equity in the property to accomplish that. You know as well as I do that remaining on the mortgage for a house I no longer hold an ownership interest in is a terrible idea, and this court cannot and should not compel me to do so. She needs to refinance the house into her own name. I will cooperate with that process. She is apparently either unable or unwilling to do that. While I am willing to wait a certain amount of time, I would still like this to be over and have my finances separated from hers. Also, I have explained this to her numerous times and have only been berated and harangued for my trouble. Would you please, Your Honor, explain this to her again? Perhaps the authority of this court will make her understand. Further, I would ask for an order that gives her six months or a year to follow through and refinance the property so I can be freed of the obligation. Failing that, I would ask the court to force the sale of the house with a split of the equity so that this matter can be concluded and I can move on with my life. Thank you, Your Honor." And the fact that signed it to me wouldn’t matter? If I would be a judge I would ask why ta hell you agreed for her to keep the property on a first place ? Had she held you at the gun point? And btw property agreement also said wife will sell the house ________ Days Meaning non of his business or never.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Mar 31, 2021 11:58:54 GMT -5
Is he still on the mortgage documents? Because that matters. Yea he is. However divorce decree said that I shall not hold him reliable for mortgage and pay remainder by myself. Welp- sounds like you have everything perfectly under control and nothing bad can come of it, even though there are literally millions of cases dealing with this kind of sloppy paperwork. Best of luck! But, you won't need it - you have a single document that wasn't reviewed by a lawyer. I'm sure it is airtight.
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tallguy
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Post by tallguy on Mar 31, 2021 12:04:26 GMT -5
No judge is going to make him sign anything until you can get him off of the mortgage. In fact, if it were me and you tried to drag me into court over it it would probably cost you the house. "Your Honor, I have tried to be cooperative here. I am perfectly willing to sign away my interest in the house as long as I can be released from the mortgage, and will even forfeit my equity in the property to accomplish that. You know as well as I do that remaining on the mortgage for a house I no longer hold an ownership interest in is a terrible idea, and this court cannot and should not compel me to do so. She needs to refinance the house into her own name. I will cooperate with that process. She is apparently either unable or unwilling to do that. While I am willing to wait a certain amount of time, I would still like this to be over and have my finances separated from hers. Also, I have explained this to her numerous times and have only been berated and harangued for my trouble. Would you please, Your Honor, explain this to her again? Perhaps the authority of this court will make her understand. Further, I would ask for an order that gives her six months or a year to follow through and refinance the property so I can be freed of the obligation. Failing that, I would ask the court to force the sale of the house with a split of the equity so that this matter can be concluded and I can move on with my life. Thank you, Your Honor." And the fact that signed it to me wouldn’t matter? If I would be a judge I would ask why ta hell you agreed for her to keep the property on a first place ? Had she held you at the gun point? And btw property agreement also said wife will sell the house ________ Days Meaning non of his business or never. No, it doesn't matter that he is willing to let you keep the house. That is conditioned on getting him off of the mortgage. No court will force him to release ownership interest until he is released from liability. And no court can force the lender to remove him from the mortgage. That is on you. Grow up, do your part, and move on. Oh, right. I temporarily forgot who I'm talking to....
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tiana
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Post by tiana on Mar 31, 2021 12:12:07 GMT -5
Yea he is. However divorce decree said that I shall not hold him reliable for mortgage and pay remainder by myself. Welp- sounds like you have everything perfectly under control and nothing bad can come of it, even though there are literally millions of cases dealing with this kind of sloppy paperwork. Best of luck! But, you won't need it - you have a single document that wasn't reviewed by a lawyer. I'm sure it is airtight. What single document?
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tiana
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Post by tiana on Mar 31, 2021 12:14:10 GMT -5
And the fact that signed it to me wouldn’t matter? If I would be a judge I would ask why ta hell you agreed for her to keep the property on a first place ? Had she held you at the gun point? And btw property agreement also said wife will sell the house ________ Days Meaning non of his business or never. No, it doesn't matter that he is willing to let you keep the house. That is conditioned on getting him off of the mortgage. No court will force him to release ownership interest until he is released from liability. And no court can force the lender to remove him from the mortgage. That is on you. Grow up, do your part, and move on. Oh, right. I temporarily forgot who I'm talking to.... How about when county pulls out the deed - the last one recorded is the one they go by?
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Mar 31, 2021 12:23:51 GMT -5
No, it doesn't matter that he is willing to let you keep the house. That is conditioned on getting him off of the mortgage. No court will force him to release ownership interest until he is released from liability. And no court can force the lender to remove him from the mortgage. That is on you. Grow up, do your part, and move on. Oh, right. I temporarily forgot who I'm talking to.... How about when county pulls out the deed - the last one recorded is the one they go by? When who pulls the deed?
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tallguy
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Post by tallguy on Mar 31, 2021 12:26:31 GMT -5
No, it doesn't matter that he is willing to let you keep the house. That is conditioned on getting him off of the mortgage. No court will force him to release ownership interest until he is released from liability. And no court can force the lender to remove him from the mortgage. That is on you. Grow up, do your part, and move on. Oh, right. I temporarily forgot who I'm talking to.... How about when county pulls out the deed - the last one recorded is the one they go by? And he is on it, correct? And he will continue to be on it until you get his name removed, correct? Which will not happen until you get him off of the mortgage, correct? Which will not happen until you refinance the property into your own name, correct? Getting the idea yet? Unless he is even more stupid than you appear to be you have zero chance here.
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tiana
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Post by tiana on Mar 31, 2021 18:05:20 GMT -5
How about when county pulls out the deed - the last one recorded is the one they go by? And he is on it, correct? And he will continue to be on it until you get his name removed, correct? Which will not happen until you get him off of the mortgage, correct? Which will not happen until you refinance the property into your own name, correct? Getting the idea yet? Unless he is even more stupid than you appear to be you have zero chance here. Ok drama King! He just sent me prenuptial agreement with his wife that I am taking to a lawyers on Friday...
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Mar 31, 2021 18:41:25 GMT -5
Yea he is. However divorce decree said that I shall not hold him reliable for mortgage and pay remainder by myself. Welp- sounds like you have everything perfectly under control and nothing bad can come of it, even though there are literally millions of cases dealing with this kind of sloppy paperwork. Best of luck! But, you won't need it - you have a single document that wasn't reviewed by a lawyer. I'm sure it is airtight. POTD
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tiana
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Post by tiana on Apr 10, 2021 21:39:57 GMT -5
I am finally done with part1 of my dilemma. Lawyer said that we are going Quick Deed way and when I told her that I want permission from lender to transfer deed without refinancing - she called someone at Chase and they told her that they don’t give a damn because he will be off the deed but will still be on mortgage...
NOW I told him that according to court order this is what’s going to happen. He was shocked. Crushed and nearly dead! So he said there is a document that his wife made so they wouldn’t be having rights for each other stuff BEFORE marriage. Which is what we calling prenuptial agreement...right? It doesn’t say that on the document but my lawyer said it’s all correctly put and just keep it fir future.
So EX now is telling everybody that he didn’t know what he was signing and he told me that I stole his house and I am a bitch. And I had tried to tell him that IF he wasn’t so in a hurry to divorce - we wouldn’t have to DO this! We would...eventually but not in a hurry. After all he was the one who printed that packet from Internet 🤷♀️
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tiana
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Post by tiana on Apr 10, 2021 21:41:37 GMT -5
How about when county pulls out the deed - the last one recorded is the one they go by? And he is on it, correct? And he will continue to be on it until you get his name removed, correct? Which will not happen until you get him off of the mortgage, correct? Which will not happen until you refinance the property into your own name, correct? Getting the idea yet? Unless he is even more stupid than you appear to be you have zero chance here. Apparently you weren’t correct...oops!
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tiana
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Post by tiana on Apr 10, 2021 21:46:43 GMT -5
One more thing. Ive asked what is goi g to happen when court sending him a summon to sign the new deed and he refuses... Lawyer said they will lock him up until he signs. I thought that was odd but later my friend who is paralegal told me that she went trough this with her ex and she told him to have a big breakfast because they don’t feed those who are in contempt to court...
I am still not sure how this shit goes...if he doesn’t sign - they put him in a cage? And what if he is ignoring court orders to appear at all? Are they going to arrest him? I am really not happy about it...I didn’t want to hurt him. I just don’t want his wife IN MY house!
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on Apr 10, 2021 21:50:50 GMT -5
And he is on it, correct? And he will continue to be on it until you get his name removed, correct? Which will not happen until you get him off of the mortgage, correct? Which will not happen until you refinance the property into your own name, correct? Getting the idea yet? Unless he is even more stupid than you appear to be you have zero chance here. Apparently you weren’t correct...oops! Because we have no way of actually knowing how stupid your ex is, we will never know that tallguy was wrong. Did your ex sign anything yet?
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tallguy
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Post by tallguy on Apr 10, 2021 22:11:24 GMT -5
Apparently you weren’t correct...oops! Because we have no way of actually knowing how stupid your ex is, we will never know that tallguy was wrong. Did your ex sign anything yet? Actually, I said back in #45: I figure I am spot on either way.
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tallguy
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Post by tallguy on Apr 10, 2021 22:16:50 GMT -5
And he is on it, correct? And he will continue to be on it until you get his name removed, correct? Which will not happen until you get him off of the mortgage, correct? Which will not happen until you refinance the property into your own name, correct? Getting the idea yet? Unless he is even more stupid than you appear to be you have zero chance here. Apparently you weren’t correct...oops! No, I said that unless your ex is a complete idiot (in addition to being "even more stupid than you appear to be" as quoted above) it couldn't happen. I'm not going to come out and say that anyone married to you would almost have to be a complete idiot, but.... One last thing, "Don't count your Amish chickens before they hatch."
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Apr 11, 2021 10:15:29 GMT -5
If I were to write pre-nups, the entire first page would just be that the divorce can't be final until every joint account, every joint credit card, every joint mortgage and any other debt that is in both names are dissolved - either by selling assets or refinancing. If you can't refinance your mortgage, the house goes. This is a clause that every marriage needs. Many people feel they don't need a pre-nup because they have no assets. But losing money can sometimes be less detrimental than staying financially connected through debt. I would actually like to see that become part of law.
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bean29
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Post by bean29 on Apr 11, 2021 14:16:27 GMT -5
If I were to write pre-nups, the entire first page would just be that the divorce can't be final until every joint account, every joint credit card, every joint mortgage and any other debt that is in both names are dissolved - either by selling assets or refinancing. If you can't refinance your mortgage, the house goes. This is a clause that every marriage needs. Many people feel they don't need a pre-nup because they have no assets. But losing money can sometimes be less detrimental than staying financially connected through debt. I would actually like to see that become part of law. Having been burned by the 50/50 split of CC debt that was still “Jointly and Severally Liable” no matter what my divorce decree said, I want to agree, but I wonder if Underwater Chloe thinks she was better off ending the Marriage and paying off the underwater house? If the alternative is staying Married it may not be a better deal. MPL’s Ex stayed on the Mortgage too and they made it work. That said, I mostly agree with you, but if you can’t pay off the debt, I think you should still get divorced. The alternative is both parties file bankruptcy, and that may not be the best decision for the parties involved. I could have sued my ex for specific performance after I paid off CC but I never bothered. It was more trouble than it was worth.
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on Apr 11, 2021 14:29:06 GMT -5
If I were to write pre-nups, the entire first page would just be that the divorce can't be final until every joint account, every joint credit card, every joint mortgage and any other debt that is in both names are dissolved - either by selling assets or refinancing. If you can't refinance your mortgage, the house goes. This is a clause that every marriage needs. Many people feel they don't need a pre-nup because they have no assets. But losing money can sometimes be less detrimental than staying financially connected through debt. I would actually like to see that become part of law. Having been burned by the 50/50 split of CC debt that was still “Jointly and Severally Liable” no matter what my divorce decree said, I want to agree, but I wonder if Underwater Chloe thinks she was better off ending the Marriage and paying off the underwater house? If the alternative is staying Married it may not be a better deal. MPL’s Ex stayed on the Mortgage too and they made it work. That said, I mostly agree with you, but if you can’t pay off the debt, I think you should still get divorced. The alternative is both parties file bankruptcy, and that may not be the best decision for the parties involved. I could have sued my ex for specific performance after I paid off CC but I never bothered. It was more trouble than it was worth. Perhaps what thyme4change suggests is the good default plan. If a marriage collapses and the couple can agree to modify it, so be it. If they can't make that agreement, then the provision is obviously what should happen. This is said without major thought of all implications so please post contrary points.
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tiana
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Post by tiana on Apr 11, 2021 16:16:35 GMT -5
Apparently you weren’t correct...oops! Because we have no way of actually knowing how stupid your ex is, we will never know that tallguy was wrong. Did your ex sign anything yet? He didn’t signed anything yet except during divorce... I just met the lawyer recently and she is working on it. And tallguy was wrong because he said ex being left on the deed is a bad thing BUT it’s actually not...as long as his name is gone from the deed. And I don’t even care about it much for any other purpose than preventing my house from becoming someone else’s except my family an asset.
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tiana
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Post by tiana on Apr 11, 2021 16:19:12 GMT -5
Because we have no way of actually knowing how stupid your ex is, we will never know that tallguy was wrong. Did your ex sign anything yet? Actually, I said back in #45: I figure I am spot on either way. No you are not because I don’t mind having him in the mortgage. As long as his name is off the deed. I am not vicious. I am not planning to hurt him. I just want her as far as I can from the house. That’s all. He is still my child’s father...
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tallguy
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Post by tallguy on Apr 11, 2021 16:28:55 GMT -5
Because we have no way of actually knowing how stupid your ex is, we will never know that tallguy was wrong. Did your ex sign anything yet? He didn’t signed anything yet except during divorce... I just met the lawyer recently and she is working on it. And tallguy was wrong because he said ex being left on the deed is a bad thing BUT it’s actually not...as long as his name is gone from the deed.And I don’t even care about it much for any other purpose than preventing my house from becoming someone else’s except my family an asset. You still don't even know what you are saying.
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tallguy
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Post by tallguy on Apr 11, 2021 16:31:39 GMT -5
Actually, I said back in #45: I figure I am spot on either way. No you are not because I don’t mind having him in the mortgage. As long as his name is off the deed. I am not vicious. I am not planning to hurt him. I just want her as far as I can from the house. That’s all. He is still my child’s father... Of course not, but whether you don't mind is not the problem. HE should not release one without a release from the other. If he does then he is a complete idiot.
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Apr 11, 2021 16:35:56 GMT -5
He didn’t signed anything yet except during divorce... I just met the lawyer recently and she is working on it. And tallguy was wrong because he said ex being left on the deed is a bad thing BUT it’s actually not...as long as his name is gone from the deed.And I don’t even care about it much for any other purpose than preventing my house from becoming someone else’s except my family an asset. You still don't even know what you are saying. Amen brother. I just did a quick search on the subject, and took about 10 minutes to learn why removing an ex's name from both mortgage and deed is a good idea, and how to do it. Why anyone would want to be tied to an ex through property just makes no sense, regardless of how civil you are to each other. The legal ties that bind can end up dragging one or both of you down financially, if one of you cannot pay the obligation. And if one person cannot refinance alone, which is the way to remove his name from the mortgage, then selling the place makes more sense. Take the money and find something else. But keeping a house you cannot afford out of pride or spite makes no sense in the short or long run. So what if it goes to someone you don't like? His new girlfriend? What is she to you? You hooked up with someone new. Why shouldn't your ex?
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