Looking for advice on money management, recently widowed

[jmlrn]

My husband passed away at 65 & was receiving disability. I am 60 & currently working per diem (no guaranteed hours). I am looking to have someone go over my monthly bills, see what my usual check amount is for & see when I should take survivor benefits. Also if my current income will be enough to live on without dipping into savings. Even when my husband was alive we were using savings to supplement month to month. Also when I could comfortably retire or if I can at all. What I should be doing with CDs that mature in this time of very low interest rates. Our joint investments are all no risk & I am not willing to take risk with my money. My understanding of financial planners is that they ultimately want you to invest in stock & they will be charge a fee & it will be an ongoing relationship. My husband had all this down pat, never wanted annuities. He had a vision & I want to continue that but I'm not sure who I could sit down with to help me. The family friend he said I could always go to does not want to help me with this unfortunately. Do I need a financial planner or something else? My banker wants to sell me annuities & I don't feel they would be looking out for my best interests.

[Blonde Granny]

You will find there are many of us here are widows. My DH died 4.5 years ago and I handle my money. I live on Social Security and VA Disability. I do not take money from investments unless not os an emergency You have some interesting questions, and perhaps we should start by your monthly bills.

For now, I'll step aside and let others start with the questions and answers.

Blond Granny - Admin

[oped]

Your bank is not looking out for your interests. People selling annuities are making commission off of the sale. IF you seek a financial advisor, make sure you are paying him a fee... he is getting his money from YOU to advise YOU and not getting his money from the things he sells to you. 

If you are willing to share details here, people will offer you advice.  We used to do that all the time, but we have few new members these days so its a pleasure to help if we can  

You may want to look at WIR board, technically it is Women in Red, so many people may be dealing with debt, but there is a lot of good information about living on a budget available there. 

[buystoys]

Welcome!

As stated above, if you will post your expenses and income, people will be happy to help you determine your current financial outlook.  There will be a lot of advice offered, so be ready to ask more questions if you don't understand what is being said. 

I agree with oped that your bank is never looking out for YOUR best interests.  Avoid their investment advice as if it were the plague. 

Here's a very good article about fee only financial advisors:  link

[Blonde Granny]

The first thing may need is income then budget.

I use a program called You Need a Budget or YNAB. There are still a few of us who still use it. So, what is your income per month and you can call it something simple for your sake. Then it is steady monthly income or does it vary.


You talked about monthly bills. Mine are broken down using YNAB.

"Monthly Bills" these are not open for discussion....these can't be changed. Mine are:
ADT my Security System
ATT This is my phone (land line), Internet, TV (and maybe something I missed)
Natural Gas
Electricity
Life Lock
Netflix
Water
Verizon (cell)
There are a couple of others, but special to me and others may not have those.

Now, take a look at what your bills are: do they get paid by you sending a check, auto draft from bank? And how much are they per month ? When you get these looked at an considered, come back and we can see where they could be altered. And let's not forget what you pay for Medicare and a supplement if you have one.

[tallguy]

Yes, you absolutely must figure out what all of your expenses are.  That is the most important number.  The next thing is to figure out what all of your savings and investments amount to.  Finally, get an accurate estimate from Social Security what your survivor benefit would be both now at 60 and up to your full retirement age (67?), as well as what your own benefit would be from 62 up to 70.  It is a complicated exercise but one you must do.  If you claim benefits while continuing to work, there is a threshold below which your benefit is not reduced, while if you go over that in earned income your SS check is reduced by $1 for every $2 over the earnings limit.  The earnings limit for 2020 is $18,240.  It may change each year, but will apply as long as you are under your full retirement age.  How much do you earn each year working, and would your benefits be partially withheld?  There is more to consider, but this first part is critical.  

[Deleted]

Welcome, jmlrn.  I'll be honest in that I think you are looking for a lot from a financial advisor, and it may be more expensive than you think.  By that, I mean that financial advisors usually look at the big picture  with you--how you should be invested, how you should handle withdrawals, when to take SS, etc.  Mine have made other big picture suggestions such as suggesting how to avoid PMI when buying a house and offering to look over my insurance to see if it meets my needs.

But looking at your monthly bills, etc. is little picture stuff.  That's probably going to take you into the realm of a financial planner that you have to pay by the hour.  (The other forms of compensation are typically commission and/or a percentage of your investment assets.   The latter encompasses what is called "fee-based" as does the hourly form.)  Bills and budgeting are something you can do yourself if you have good records.  And in this electronic age, good records are easy to have since most statements, etc. can be found online.  You just need a good budgeting program as Blonde Granny suggests.

A little bit of a warning if you decide to post your monthly income and bills.  Personally, I've never been that brave.  We are a friendly bunch most of the time, but we aren't professionals for the most part.  So we have our own biases.  Don't feel attacked if you think a $100 cell phone bill is a necessity, and several people start insisting you would be better off with a $10 a month pay-as-you-go plan.   Posting your budget might help you understand your priorities.  You don't have to take anyone's advice no matter what they tell you. 

Good luck! 

[haapai]

I've never been brave enough to post my inflows and outgoes either.  I've been a YMer (on various platforms) for almost 20 years now. 

I desperately want to present us as a friendly, mostly harmless bunch, but I've seen some pretty awful things happen when people post the actual numbers.  Some folks are really blunt, others don't seem to read too well. 

But you absolutely must figure out what your inflows and outflows are.  That's non-negotiable.  If you doubt us, start reading up on how to get a financial life and you'll quickly discover that knowing what is coming in and what is going out is one of the first two steps that you have to take.  You do not have to tell us those numbers, but you do need to know them. 

Please, for your own sake, figure out where your money is coming from and where it is going.  Yes, it's a complicated, tedious, detail-heavy project that can leave you vomiting into a waste-paper bin, but you have to do it. 

[sesfw]

When I was widowed quite a few years ago (20+), some time during the shock I was aware enough to put everything on paper.  Took me a bit to do it and as things came in, I added to the list.

That way I could see exactly what was coming in and what was being spent.  And I could see where I could cut things at the beginning.  I cut to the bare bone.

My best advice is a financial advisor, not planner.  Can you talk to the person you have your investments with?

Good luck .... and yes, you can get all the advice you want but use common sense and gut feelings as what to do with it.

[Tiny]

  
 In addition to monthly expenses - you will need to look for and track Quarterly, Semi Yearly, and Yearly expenses.  

Your credit card statements and bank documents can be invaluable to look back at the last year or two to find intermittent  but recurring outflows of money  (car insurance paid every 6 months, house insurance paid yearly, property Taxes paid every 6 months for example). 

If you are comfortable with the computer but are getting only paper bills (for credit cards and bank statements) it might not be a bad plan to set up online access to credit cards and banks you use.  You can then access sometimes up to 5 years of old bills and documents at the click of a button (or two).  As well as see all of the bank accounts held by each bank - no hunting around for hardcopy documents.  


I would use this forum as way to "see/find out about things you didn't know about"  or as a way to put together information in order to start a meaningful conversation with someone in Real Life about your finances.        

You will have to compile your expenses (over the course of a year), you will need to identify all of the various accounts across banks/other that you might have, you will need to identify your "income streams"  no matter WHO helps you with all of this.  

This is a good place to start identifying and dealing with all the "Ducks" that you will eventually need to get in a line.  

Remember that Advice is NEVER a command to do something.  Not taking someone's advice is NOT an affront to that person.    Advice is the dispensing of knowledge or a point of view. 

[MN-Investor]

A few comments -

1) Don't make big decisions right away. Spend time learning about investments before you make any changes to how you invest.

2) Knowing what your annual expenses are is critical to developing a plan of action. Only you can do that, not any financial advisor. How are things paid? By check, by credit card, by cash. You need to look at all of those. I don't know how you're paid, but if certain deductions are taken from your pay (w/h, fica, etc.) then make sure you include those in your annual expenses. Once you know what your annual expenses are, THEN you can figure out how to pay for them or how to reduce or eliminate them.

3) Don't write off investing in the stock market yet. No, don't jump into it now, I'm not saying that. It's just that bonds and CDs do not keep up with inflation and that's important for long term investing. At age 60, you may very well live 30 more years. That's long term. At some point you will want to add stock to your portfolio. Just keep that in mind. A good stock market investment would be Vanguard's Total Stock Market Index Fund.

[Deleted]

mn-investor brought up the first thing I was going to mention: don't make any fast decisions if you don't have to. Take your time- many people who lose a spouse have a period of "Widow brain" that may go on for awhile and you feel like you're living in a fog. Not a good time to make major moves, financial or otherwise, if you can avoid them. I was widowed in 2016 but I'd always been the investor- DH was an English major and I was a Math major. It worked out!

Get a book on investing that your find readable. "Investing for Dummies" or "ETFs for Dummies" might be a good start- I love that series because they assume no previous knowledge and they explain in plain English and with a sense of humor.

How involved were you with the finances? Do you know, for example, how much you were taking out of savings each year as a % of savings? Some advisors say that it should be no more than 3 or 4% and that's with a portfolio that's 70% invested in stocks. If you're mostly in CDs and money market funds you can take out less because the yield is lower. Are you comfortable with sharing an approximate level of your savings- high or low five figures, 6 figures, etc?

Do your late husband's disability payments disappear or will you be collecting a survivor benefit?

One major factor in your decision to retire will have to be health insurance. What will you do to bridge the years between retirement and Medicare? My monthly ACA premium in 2017 just before I got onto Medicare was $900 and that was with a $6K deductible.

You may eventually want to invest part of your savings in stocks, stock mutual funds or ETFs but you can do it through a low-cost brokerage such as Fidelity or Charles Schwab and unless you request an account with an advisor, your only cost will be transaction fees and they're minimal.

And don't buy annuities!

[Artemis Windsong]

I went through this with my DD last fall.

Are you planning on staying in your home? Is it paid off. What are the expenses?

Do you know if your H. had any life insurance policies? House, car, other vehicles/property. Any credit cards.

How much income do you have?
How much money in savings?
Will you have to sell extra vehicles? What condition is your daily driver in?

Will you have health insurance?

List your income and savings.

List your expenses.

What can you sell like a golf cart that won't be used or tractors or whatever.

You can park any extra money in a savings account. I'm sorry that interest return is near zero but the money will be safe.

Park one years expenses in a savings account. Then evaluate possible investments. Take a class if you can.

Find a grief support group. Get prescriptions if you have anxiety, nausea, depression. Update your will when you are up to it.

---------------
What my DD had to do. List her house immediately. Thank heaven it sold in 6 weeks. She moved to an apartment.

She had two Subarus. Both had payments. Some how she traded both of them in for a brand new Jeep. There is probably financing. Her son helped her.

The cash she got was put in savings. When she reached her year worth of expenses, she started on CDs staggering their maturity.

Then the biddy at the apartment house said she had a "aggressive looking" dog. She had anxiety taking a leashed dog out to toilet.

She called her realtor who found her an over under duplex that she bought. She got out of her one year lease. Moved into the duplex with a giant yard.

The basement was rented to her best friend.

Sold was a tractor, snowmobile trailer, golf cart given to one of the children, 2 subarus, the house, motorcycle, snowmobiles, boat and trailer. Still needed to be sold is a camper.

The emotional support she got was grief group, a pastor, a counselor. She has 4 children in the same town and grand children.

[vetswife]

I've been widowed for 16 months and live on Social Security and Veterans' survivor benefits.  I don't touch my investments except for exceptional things, and I keep an emergency fund that's easily accessible for that, build it back up when I've taken from it.  Having a budget is a must and knowing what your bills are will help you get started.  I keep track of my spending as it happens and try to know where it all goes.  For other support, I hope you have a grief group and a church to help you get through this time.

[tractor]

First, sorry for your loss. All of the advice you have been given has been great and I highly recommend that you start with the basics. Do your best to educate yourself, and don’t be afraid to ask questions here. You may get different answers, but it would be no different than talking to a bunch of random financial advisors (except we provide our advice for free 🙂).

It sounds like your husband took care of most things, which isn’t unusual. If I die tomorrow my wife would be in the same boat so don’t feel like you’re the only one having to figure this all out at this point in your life.

But most of all, remember to breathe. Take your time, and wade into the financial waters, it may be scary at first, but understanding your financial picture, and being in control can be very empowering.

[bobosensei]

I'm sorry for your loss.  If you were dipping into savings to supplement monthly spending you may need to cut expenses, but depending on how much of a spender your husband was it may not be that bad.  If you list your monthly income, the amount you have saved and in CDs or invested, and your monthly and annual expenses we can give some advice.

[Deleted]

Jun 18, 2020 15:51:40 GMT -5 tractor said:

First, sorry for your loss. All of the advice you have been given has been great and I highly recommend that you start with the basics. Do your best to educate yourself, and don’t be afraid to ask questions here. You may get different answers, but it would be no different than talking to a bunch of random financial advisors (except we provide our advice for free 🙂).

It sounds like your husband took care of most things, which isn’t unusual. If I die tomorrow my wife would be in the same boat so don’t feel like you’re the only one having to figure this all out at this point in your life.

But most of all, remember to breathe. Take your time, and wade into the financial waters, it may be scary at first, but understanding your financial picture, and being in control can be very empowering.

Please help your wife and fix that situation. You will both feel better...

[giramomma]

Below is a good budget template. It's overwhelming though, and you may need to do some editing.

Usually a list  bills isn't enough. It's also important to account for irregular, but predictable expenses. Think about car maintenance. You know you'll need to save for new tires, you just don't know when it will cost. If you own your home, you'll need to replace appliances eventually.

INCOME

Take home income

Other income


BILLS

mortgage

rent

garbage

cable

Netflix/other streaming services

landline phone

internet

cell phone

electric

natural gas/propane

water

alarm

car insurance

home insurance (if not included in mortgage)





DEBT




MONTHLY SPENDING

auto: fuel

charity

groceries/toiletries

eating out

blow money

entertainment

retirement savings (outside contributions through work)

newspaper/magazine/online subscription



SINKING FUNDS

(Take the amount you expect to spend in a year, divide by 12 and set aside this amount each month in savings.)

clothing & shoes

haircuts

pet care

gifts, parties

household/garden

Christmas/birthdays

home repairs and maintenance (1-3% of house value per year)

car repairs and maintenance/tags ($75/car/month recommended)

car registration/tags/taxes

electronics replacement

medical (rx, copays, contacts, dental)

classes/activities

property taxes (if not included in mortgage)

adult classes

travel

new car fund

[movinonup]

jmlrn I am sorry for your loss.  There is a lot that you need to do.  Don't let it overwhelm you.  

Since I don't know how recent your husband's death was, here is an AARP checklist of what to do in the period immediately after the death of a loved one.

If you don't have a trusted friend or family member that can help you with going through your monthly finances, check to see if your local government (county, city, etc.) has a Department of Senior Services.  They may be able to help you or refer you to someone.

I have zero insights into survivor benefits.  I don't know if they increase if you put off claiming them as delaying filing for your own Social Security benefits would.

I hate to tell you this, but your husband's vision may have been flawed.  You were dipping into savings each month with you working and him on disability. If you haven't already, at some point you will figure out your assets.  You will have to determine if those assets are sufficient to sustain the lifestyle that you want when you retire.  You may have to change course and take on some more risk if you believe your assets are insufficient.  It doesn't have to be radical.  Maybe start by putting 5% of your savings into an S&P 500 fund for a little more growth.  All of these statements are speculative until you know what your assets are.  For all I know, your husband was putting 90% of income into a retirement account and pulling funds out of a taxable savings account each month.

I would open an individual checking account, if you don't already have one, and deposit your paychecks there.  This way there is a place where the assets are clearly not part of your husband's estate.  You don't want to have to pay any debt that is not yours.

Any debts that are in his name only are not your responsibility.  Credit card accounts in his name only are also not for you to use at this point, even if you were an authorized user.  Call to cancel the accounts and inform the card issuers of his death.  I'm not sure how joint accounts are treated.  When you close accounts or need to remove his name from an account, they will need a death certificate.  While I am on the subject, if your husband had accounts at many institutions, you will probably need many death certificates.  You can get more, but it starts to take up a lot of time if you have to go into an office to get one every time someone requests one.  I think we got 10 certificates when my MIL died a few years ago.

Talking to any professional about what to do with your assets at this point is premature in my opinion.  Until you know your assets and liabilities and your husband's estate's assets and liabilities, your full financial picture is unknown and advice you get may not be appropriate.

I am going to stop here now because I can go on for much longer, but it will just overwhelm you and hurt my head.  Feel free to ask any questions you have.  There is a lot of collective knowledge on these boards.  

-movinonup

[tallguy]

Jun 18, 2020 23:42:28 GMT -5 movinonup said:

I have zero insights into survivor benefits.  I don't know if they increase if you put off claiming them as delaying filing for your own Social Security benefits would.

If one claims survivor benefits at age 60, and the spouse had not yet started receiving benefits, they will receive 71.5% of the deceased's Primary Insurance Amount, or the benefit they would have received at Full Retirement Age.  The benefit increases every month until it maxes out at the beneficiary's FRA.  Unlike one's own retirement benefit, there are no delayed retirement credits for survivor benefits.  They do not continue to grow after that, so you do not further benefit by claiming survivor benefits after your FRA.  The nice thing about survivor benefits is that there is no deeming requirement.  After the law changed a few years ago, you are no longer able to claim only a spousal benefit while allowing your own to continue to grow.  You are "deemed" to be filing for all benefits for which you are eligible.  This is NOT the case with survivor benefits.  You ARE able to claim one and not the other, and switch from one to the other at any time.  It will require an analysis of the payment amounts to figure out which claiming order is most beneficial. 

[TheOtherMe]

With both mom and dad, we didn't have to give an original death certificate to deal with their finances.  For the local ones, they made a copy.  For the distant ones, a it was sent by fax.

[Deleted]

Jun 18, 2020 23:42:28 GMT -5 movinonup said:

I would open an individual checking account, if you don't already have one, and deposit your paychecks there.  This way there is a place where the assets are clearly not part of your husband's estate.  You don't want to have to pay any debt that is not yours.

Any debts that are in his name only are not your responsibility.  Credit card accounts in his name only are also not for you to use at this point, even if you were an authorized user.  Call to cancel the accounts and inform the card issuers of his death.  I'm not sure how joint accounts are treated.  When you close accounts or need to remove his name from an account, they will need a death certificate.  While I am on the subject, if your husband had accounts at many institutions, you will probably need many death certificates.  You can get more, but it starts to take up a lot of time if you have to go into an office to get one every time someone requests one.  I think we got 10 certificates when my MIL died a few years ago.

Lots of good advice but I'm just addressing the above.  I hadn't even thought about the separate checking account, but DH and I already had them and he had no debts other than being on the mortgage.  

Some banks are tapped into the SS death database.  DH had a checking account with about $300 in it.  I planned to take my time on that and Bank of America sent me paperwork.  There was stuff to fill out and bring to the branch and some waiting but it was pretty simple and they'd initiated it.

I'm sure the AARP checklist mentions reporting the death to the credit bureaus.  At the time I didn't need a death certificate for that.  One actually sent me an acknowledgement and a copy of DH's credit report, which is ordinarily a PITA to obtain.  It will also give you a good estimate of any debts in your late husband's name.

Over 4 years later I still haven't gotten DH's name off some of the accounts for the utilities.  No reason to.  You should eventually make sure the car is titled in your name.  I had to replace mine on short notice last week and that would have been a complication I didn't need.

There are some good on-line calculators for retirement and SS to help in your decision-making. Just make sure you don't use any that require any contact info other than an e-mail address. 


  

[jmlrn]

I appreciate all the comments. I’ve been widowed 3 months now so everything has been taken care of as far as reporting his death etc. We have no debts or mortgage. I’ve already sold what I could & cut some expenses. I know how the social security survivor death benefit works. I just don’t know the best time to take it. No matter what it is just a small $1200-1400/month check. It would help but if they start taking away $1 for every $2 earned over $18,200 they will basically take it all back. I get my health insurance from the state gateway so I’ve never been dependent on my job to get insurance.

I guess my biggest dilemma now is what to do with the money when a CD comes due. We always kept laddered CDs so we would have money available if we needed it. Thank goodness it was there to pay for his funeral. I will need to dip into the next one due for some home repairs. Interest rates are terrible right now but I guess I could always roll it over for the shortest term. I put 15% of my paycheck into a 403b & they provide 6% employer match. I just don’t feel comfortable putting my money in anything where it’s value will go down right now because I have bad feelings about our economy. Losing any amount of money is quite upsetting to me.

I think I probably can’t afford either a financial advisor or planner. Not sure what the difference is between the two.

[The Walk of the Penguin Mich]

Jun 20, 2020 13:40:03 GMT -5 jmlrn said:

I appreciate all the comments. I’ve been widowed 3 months now so everything has been taken care of as far as reporting his death etc. We have no debts or mortgage. I’ve already sold what I could & cut some expenses. I know how the social security survivor death benefit works. I just don’t know the best time to take it. No matter what it is just a small $1200-1400/month check. It would help but if they start taking away $1 for every $2 earned over $18,200 they will basically take it all back. I get my health insurance from the state gateway so I’ve never been dependent on my job to get insurance.

I guess my biggest dilemma now is what to do with the money when a CD comes due. We always kept laddered CDs so we would have money available if we needed it. Thank goodness it was there to pay for his funeral. I will need to dip into the next one due for some home repairs. Interest rates are terrible right now but I guess I could always roll it over for the shortest term. I put 15% of my paycheck into a 403b & they provide 6% employer match. I just don’t feel comfortable putting my money in anything where it’s value will go down right now because I have bad feelings about our economy. Losing any amount of money is quite upsetting to me.

I think I probably can’t afford either a financial advisor or planner. Not sure what the difference is between the two.

A 2 hour meeting with our FA cost about $200.  If you go into one very prepared, he should be able to give you some ideas as to how to proceed.

When we meet with him, we have updated budgets, a list of assets and their values, a list of liabilities and projections.  Going in prepared saves his time, and our’s (thus $$).  He is not trying to sell us anything, but has far more knowledge about tax laws and how to proceed.

The second one we have is more expensive....I think about $300/session.  But we need his expertise if trying to figure out cross border investments.  He probably is more comprehensive in what we need, but the first guy is also our tax accountant.  

Regardless, it is highly suggested that you not make any major financial decisions for a year in the death of a spouse.  So you have 9 months to research your options.  

[movinonup]

Jun 20, 2020 13:40:03 GMT -5 jmlrn said:

I guess my biggest dilemma now is what to do with the money when a CD comes due. We always kept laddered CDs so we would have money available if we needed it. Thank goodness it was there to pay for his funeral. I will need to dip into the next one due for some home repairs. Interest rates are terrible right now but I guess I could always roll it over for the shortest term. I put 15% of my paycheck into a 403b & they provide 6% employer match. I just don’t feel comfortable putting my money in anything where it’s value will go down right now because I have bad feelings about our economy. Losing any amount of money is quite upsetting to me.

If you are truly this risk averse, there is basically nothing other than cash, and maybe TIPS, that is completely risk free.  How do you invest your 403b?  How much do you have in the account?  I guess it makes sense to meet with a fee only financial advisor who can look at your assets and let you know what you can expect in terms of a retirement if you stay the course.  Based on the information that we have, I think you do need to take on some risk, but I'm just some random, anonymous guy on a message board.  Someone needs to look at your finances and spell out how you are doing and where you will be when you want to retire.  

Based on what tallguy posted, I would wait until whatever time will maximize your survivor benefit to start collecting.  To me, and again I have very limited information, it sounds like you are going to need every penny you can get when you are ready to retire.

Best of luck to you, jmlrn.  If you do want to post some numbers, I am sure we will be happy to offer whatever advice we have.  You can take it or leave it, but it will be free.

-movinonup

[Deleted]

Jun 20, 2020 13:40:03 GMT -5 jmlrn said:

I know how the social security survivor death benefit works. I just don’t know the best time to take it. No matter what it is just a small $1200-1400/month check. It would help but if they start taking away $1 for every $2 earned over $18,200 they will basically take it all back. 

Yes, they do that with Survivor benefits as well as regular SS.  I just looked it up. 

Good to see you back- I know you got a lot of good advice thrown at you at once.

[Deleted]

I'm not sure there is really a difference between a financial advisor and a financial planner.  So don't let that throw you.  You do want whomever you might choose to use to have a fiduciary responsibility towards you (must choose the best investments, etc. for you, not him, although I think that is rather vague in my opinion) and preferably CFP (certified financial planner credentials).  

But if you just wants nuts-and-bolts advice, you can post here.  We are amateurs with varied backgrounds, but more than a few of us are widows.  However, that only sort of helps you.  My husband died 8 months ago tomorrow.  But I had just retired at age 65 so a lot of things came together for me that wouldn't for you.  

Anyway, we LOVE to play Budget 101.  We are even good at it.  Just don't let anyone hurt your feelings when they attack your own personal sacred cows. 

[Blonde Granny]

The first time I saw my FA in person he required that I bring all my papers: Tax, YNAB, anything that he didn't already have etc. So, I'm sitting there feeling like a little girl from kindergarten as he's looking down the pages and he gets to YNAB. Top group no comment, no raised eyebrows......second column he looked at the top category which was "clothing"....his comment was: Do you really spend $100/mo on clothes? I said no, sometimes I spend even more.

That may have been the last time he ever asked...and told me I was worse that his wife.

Anyway, he is a sweetie, never fails to answer my calls, and has my best interest at heart, and usually won't make any changes without a heads up to me.

[tallguy]

Jun 20, 2020 16:17:58 GMT -5 movinonup said:

Jun 20, 2020 13:40:03 GMT -5 jmlrn said:

I guess my biggest dilemma now is what to do with the money when a CD comes due. We always kept laddered CDs so we would have money available if we needed it. Thank goodness it was there to pay for his funeral. I will need to dip into the next one due for some home repairs. Interest rates are terrible right now but I guess I could always roll it over for the shortest term. I put 15% of my paycheck into a 403b & they provide 6% employer match. I just don’t feel comfortable putting my money in anything where it’s value will go down right now because I have bad feelings about our economy. Losing any amount of money is quite upsetting to me.

If you are truly this risk averse, there is basically nothing other than cash, and maybe TIPS, that is completely risk free.  How do you invest your 403b?  How much do you have in the account?  I guess it makes sense to meet with a fee only financial advisor who can look at your assets and let you know what you can expect in terms of a retirement if you stay the course.  Based on the information that we have, I think you do need to take on some risk, but I'm just some random, anonymous guy on a message board.  Someone needs to look at your finances and spell out how you are doing and where you will be when you want to retire.  

Based on what tallguy posted, I would wait until whatever time will maximize your survivor benefit to start collecting.  To me, and again I have very limited information, it sounds like you are going to need every penny you can get when you are ready to retire.

Best of luck to you, jmlrn .  If you do want to post some numbers, I am sure we will be happy to offer whatever advice we have.  You can take it or leave it, but it will be free.

-movinonup

The VERY general rule is that you should max out the higher benefit, particularly if you are in good health and have a long projected lifespan.  If the deceased spouse's benefit would be higher, then take your own benefit early and switch to survivor's at FRA.  If your own benefit is higher, then take survivor's at 60 (or whenever it becomes relevant) and allow your own to grow until 70.  Again, this is very general and each person needs to do their own analysis for their own situation.  If one continues to work that adds another level of decision-making because of the earnings limit prior to FRA.  There are programs you can buy that claim to calculate the optimal time and claiming strategy, but I have never looked into them.

[countrygirl2]

I sure wouldn't retire till you can get the full amount and also medicare at 65.  That's the first issue, you take a hit on SS. And since you were already taking money out of savings, kind of worrisome.

We too are very risk adverse but for us, we added rentals for income, would not be possible for you, and not advised. But that's a portion of our income.

We are the opposite, I take care of all finances, I have gone to a tax acct and an attorney. Hubs has the idea attorneys just want to take you, sigh.  But because we have a disabled daughter I got him to get things in order. Also the mind will eventually not be as agile and I want people set up to take care of financial issues for us.

I need to work up for him where everything is and who to contact.  He won't waste money, that's for sure but does not understand all the financial nuances.  He doesn't want to since I take care of it all.

I agree, do a budget, know what income and all your expenses are. What you can cut if need be, be realistic.  Sounds like you have no debt and assets, so you have a great start. We too have laddered CD's that earn nothing but we aren't changing that. We are 74 and can pull money out over 20 plus years so ok and if your hubs has 401k's that will be an asset you can tap into eventually.  

I've never been to a financial advisor, but folks here have good advice. I will be interested to see what they offer. My condolences and I agree, don't change much for a year, don't jump into something quickly you might regret. And I have never heard much good about annuities, you basically give away your money for a guaranteed amount and I won't do that. Good luck