OldCoyote
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Joined: Dec 21, 2010 10:34:48 GMT -5
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Post by OldCoyote on Mar 16, 2019 23:28:13 GMT -5
I have been dating this lady for over fifty three years, Married her Mar, 20, 1966. I still take her to dinner,, open her door, treat her like we are still dating! Your dating stories scare the hell out of me,, And I not scared of anything!
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Apple
Junior Associate
Always travel with a sense of humor
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 15:51:04 GMT -5
Posts: 9,931
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Post by Apple on Mar 18, 2019 13:02:42 GMT -5
It's been a few years since I've dated, and so details have grown fuzzy on some stuff, but here is one "online dating" failure...
Dr. Demento...
Not sure what the guy's profile read, or how long we talked before we met up, but likely within two weeks when schedules matched.
According to his profile, he was working through college toward some kind of "professional degree", single, lots of travel (yea! love travel!), some big stuff that seemed to line up.
Met for a drink at a local pub, weather was nice, so we were outside under a shade awning.
Man, the guy was a talker. I'm pretty quiet and reserved, so it is kind of nice when someone can carry a conversation, ask questions without it feeling like an interrogation, etc. Except, I couldn't get a word in at all. Any time he would ask a question, I would start to answer and he'd cut me off with "oh, I've been there...." or "I've never been there, but I want...", etc.
Work stuff came up. I'm in a nice, secure job, pays well, and one where you can be a "lifer" if you choose.
He chose to spend his early 20s traveling the world, going all over the place, working little jobs to support that. Pretty cool, but not an opportunity I had had (but have though my son should do something like that for a few years while he is young, so I'm not opposed!) Then, he started college with the goal to become a doctor. Supposedly, he was at the point where he just needed to find a place to do a residency, but couldn't find anyplace? (We have a large hospital in our town that serves a large area. Also another good-sized hospital the next decent sized town over. And one in the town he lived in. And so many less than two hours away in the big city. But, I don't know everything there is to know about getting a residency, so ok...)
Because he hasn't found a place to do a residency, he's living with his parents and working at a gas station. Part time (about 14 hours a week) because he doesn't want to earn enough to have to start paying on student loans yet.
Also, he isn't sure how long he'll be in the area, because residency could be anywhere in the country. "Women here seem to want security, and I don't have that. So I just want someone who is cool with something that might just be short-term before I leave." Well... I'm a single mom to a kid who isn't going to be meeting some "short term" person. I also don't have much free time because I had him 100% of the time, even though there was technically an "every-other weekend" type custody agreement (ex-h left and never even called the kid, seeing him three times that I can remember after the divorce, and it's been many years since we've heard from him. Just some filler info...) Also, with my job, I'm not going to be wandering all over the place. It's not like a lot of jobs where you can just pick up and find a new, similar one.
At some point, he asked me how I "got off" and stated "I mean, we all have needs!" How long would I hold out on sex, stuff like that. It got pretty bizarre suddenly.
So, this guy is around 30 years old, claims to be a doctor, living with his parents, working at a gas station 14 hours a week, and looking for someone for casual hookups. Not at all what his profile relayed.
When we left it, he was all "you're pretty cool" (I guess he got that from the two or three sentences I was allowed to finish?) and we should meet up again, just text me when and where.
The next week, I'd get texts about "hey, when did you want to meet up?" while I was at work. Eventually I was able to just get it through that this wasn't going to work out the way he wanted. There was definitely no chemistry, or desire to see if maybe he was just anxious on the first date and overtalked.
There was so much more that led to the nickname "Dr. Demento", but at this point, I can't remember it. At least he didn't try to physically pull me away from my car when I left like another date did!
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MJ2.0
Senior Associate
Joined: Jul 24, 2014 10:27:09 GMT -5
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Post by MJ2.0 on Mar 19, 2019 6:32:16 GMT -5
It's been a few years since I've dated, and so details have grown fuzzy on some stuff, but here is one "online dating" failure... Dr. Demento... Not sure what the guy's profile read, or how long we talked before we met up, but likely within two weeks when schedules matched. According to his profile, he was working through college toward some kind of "professional degree", single, lots of travel (yea! love travel!), some big stuff that seemed to line up. Met for a drink at a local pub, weather was nice, so we were outside under a shade awning. Man, the guy was a talker. I'm pretty quiet and reserved, so it is kind of nice when someone can carry a conversation, ask questions without it feeling like an interrogation, etc. Except, I couldn't get a word in at all. Any time he would ask a question, I would start to answer and he'd cut me off with "oh, I've been there...." or "I've never been there, but I want...", etc. Work stuff came up. I'm in a nice, secure job, pays well, and one where you can be a "lifer" if you choose. He chose to spend his early 20s traveling the world, going all over the place, working little jobs to support that. Pretty cool, but not an opportunity I had had (but have though my son should do something like that for a few years while he is young, so I'm not opposed!) Then, he started college with the goal to become a doctor. Supposedly, he was at the point where he just needed to find a place to do a residency, but couldn't find anyplace? (We have a large hospital in our town that serves a large area. Also another good-sized hospital the next decent sized town over. And one in the town he lived in. And so many less than two hours away in the big city. But, I don't know everything there is to know about getting a residency, so ok...) Because he hasn't found a place to do a residency, he's living with his parents and working at a gas station. Part time (about 14 hours a week) because he doesn't want to earn enough to have to start paying on student loans yet. Also, he isn't sure how long he'll be in the area, because residency could be anywhere in the country. "Women here seem to want security, and I don't have that. So I just want someone who is cool with something that might just be short-term before I leave." Well... I'm a single mom to a kid who isn't going to be meeting some "short term" person. I also don't have much free time because I had him 100% of the time, even though there was technically an "every-other weekend" type custody agreement (ex-h left and never even called the kid, seeing him three times that I can remember after the divorce, and it's been many years since we've heard from him. Just some filler info...) Also, with my job, I'm not going to be wandering all over the place. It's not like a lot of jobs where you can just pick up and find a new, similar one. At some point, he asked me how I "got off" and stated "I mean, we all have needs!" How long would I hold out on sex, stuff like that. It got pretty bizarre suddenly. So, this guy is around 30 years old, claims to be a doctor, living with his parents, working at a gas station 14 hours a week, and looking for someone for casual hookups. Not at all what his profile relayed.When we left it, he was all "you're pretty cool" (I guess he got that from the two or three sentences I was allowed to finish?) and we should meet up again, just text me when and where. The next week, I'd get texts about "hey, when did you want to meet up?" while I was at work. Eventually I was able to just get it through that this wasn't going to work out the way he wanted. There was definitely no chemistry, or desire to see if maybe he was just anxious on the first date and overtalked. There was so much more that led to the nickname "Dr. Demento", but at this point, I can't remember it. At least he didn't try to physically pull me away from my car when I left like another date did! it's really a shame that that is not at all uncommon on dating sites. Every other guy is an "entrepreneur".... one of my friends joked that "entrepreneur" = not doing shit
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MJ2.0
Senior Associate
Joined: Jul 24, 2014 10:27:09 GMT -5
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Post by MJ2.0 on Mar 19, 2019 6:36:28 GMT -5
I met the guy last night. I guess it's a good sign that before we met up we had to agree on a stop time so we wouldn't be kicked out at closing. Things went very well. I swear those 4 hours flew! My friends were texting me around 10 asking how the date was.... um, we're still out! So yeah - we did lots of laughs and smiles. And we have plans for Saturday.
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chiver78
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Current Events Admin
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 13:04:45 GMT -5
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Post by chiver78 on Mar 19, 2019 6:56:39 GMT -5
that's awesome, MJ! apple, I'm not sure whether to laugh or be horrified. I have my own chuckle from the weekend. still sitting here SMH over it, actually, three days later. I went to my dive bar with M and roommate showed up later to join us. Mr Guy wandered in and grabbed a seat at the end of the bar. at one point, M and roommate went outside to smoke. Mr Guy looked over and chuckled, saying he quit cold turkey a few months back. okay, I gave a little applause, and said good for you, I love hearing when anyone quits smoking. I stayed at my pub table, he stayed at the bar. I spoke to him a little while later when I went up to grab another round of drinks and the only open spot was at the end of the bar next to him. at this point, I realized he was probably on the better side of drunk when he got there b/c he was fairly hammered then. well, not long after that, he goes to leave and he's walking sideways. awesome. he's almost out the door, then turns around and comes back to our table. he grabs my roommate's hand to shake it, gives me a hug like he's going to break me, and looks at M and says "where do I know you from?" she gave him a strange look and says "chiver's house...?" lol... so I say to him, please text me when you get home.... b/c that's what I do. I wanted to make sure he made it the mile up the street safely in one piece. I wasn't driving, so it wasn't like I could drop him off. not that I really wanted to do that, either, but you KWIM. the laugh? he fb messages me that he's home, then proceeds to point out that if I want pizza and no strings attached cuddles, that his door is open. come again? uh, no. I just answered "great that you made it home safe. sleep well" and closed the window. 20min later, apparently he realized I wasn't coming by, and says thanks for checking in. I have no intention of answering. what the hell? I'm out with friends, you vaporized a year ago and were actually an asshole to me the last time I saw you at that same dive bar, and you think I'm going to leave my friends and answer your booty call? hard pass, buddy.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Mar 20, 2019 12:39:45 GMT -5
The day after a 4 hour date, a nearly 6 hour phone conversation, talking about everything and anything - including hints at what we would like to do in future dates (some of them including the summer) - except what we were supposed to be discussing.... what we want to do on Saturday night!!!!! I don’t know if I should be concerned about this, lol
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gs11rmb
Senior Member
Joined: Dec 21, 2010 12:43:39 GMT -5
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Post by gs11rmb on Mar 20, 2019 13:15:03 GMT -5
The day after a 4 hour date, a nearly 6 hour phone conversation, talking about everything and anything - including hints at what we would like to do in future dates (some of them including the summer) - except what we were supposed to be discussing.... what we want to do on Saturday night!!!!! I don’t know if I should be concerned about this, lol I think you should be happy and just enjoy the moment
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andi9899
Distinguished Associate
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Post by andi9899 on Mar 20, 2019 13:22:43 GMT -5
The day after a 4 hour date, a nearly 6 hour phone conversation, talking about everything and anything - including hints at what we would like to do in future dates (some of them including the summer) - except what we were supposed to be discussing.... what we want to do on Saturday night!!!!! I don’t know if I should be concerned about this, lol I think you should be happy and just enjoy the moment I concur.
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chiver78
Administrator
Current Events Admin
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 13:04:45 GMT -5
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Post by chiver78 on Mar 20, 2019 13:23:45 GMT -5
^what they said. 😁
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Mar 20, 2019 13:24:34 GMT -5
I think you should be happy and just enjoy the moment I concur. Thirded.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Mar 20, 2019 13:43:31 GMT -5
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NastyWoman
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Post by NastyWoman on Mar 20, 2019 16:39:26 GMT -5
I have been dating this lady for over fifty three years, Married her Mar, 20, 1966. I still take her to dinner,, open her door, treat her like we are still dating! Your dating stories scare the hell out of me,, And I not scared of anything! Happy anniversary OldCoyote
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chapeau
Well-Known Member
Joined: Jan 17, 2013 10:50:04 GMT -5
Posts: 1,649
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Post by chapeau on Mar 20, 2019 18:38:21 GMT -5
Fifteenth-ed. Have fun, don’t overthink it.
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weltschmerz
Community Leader
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Post by weltschmerz on Mar 20, 2019 18:48:48 GMT -5
Supposedly, he was at the point where he just needed to find a place to do a residency, but couldn't find anyplace? (We have a large hospital in our town that serves a large area. Also another good-sized hospital the next decent sized town over. And one in the town he lived in. And so many less than two hours away in the big city. But, I don't know everything there is to know about getting a residency, so ok...)
That's not unusual. There are many large teaching/trauma hospitals in Quebec, but my niece was only able to do her residency in Ontario. She's still there, and had to uproot the whole family so she could work at Toronto's Sick Kids Hospital. Those residency spots are very hard to come by.
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Apple
Junior Associate
Always travel with a sense of humor
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 15:51:04 GMT -5
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Mini-Profile Name Color: dc0e29
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Post by Apple on Mar 20, 2019 21:32:28 GMT -5
Supposedly, he was at the point where he just needed to find a place to do a residency, but couldn't find anyplace? (We have a large hospital in our town that serves a large area. Also another good-sized hospital the next decent sized town over. And one in the town he lived in. And so many less than two hours away in the big city. But, I don't know everything there is to know about getting a residency, so ok...)
That's not unusual. There are many large teaching/trauma hospitals in Quebec, but my niece was only able to do her residency in Ontario. She's still there, and had to uproot the whole family so she could work at Toronto's Sick Kids Hospital. Those residency spots are very hard to come by. There was nothing else in the conversation that indicated he was being truthful and had actually gone to medical school. Maybe he was, but having almost gone into the medical field myself, and having mentioned that, it just didn't feel like he was being honest with that. Like, he could impress me that he was "a doctor", but once there was a hint that I could understand some of the jargon and classes, it was kind of dropped. You can be anything you want to be when you only plan on sticking around a month or two. So, who knows.
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TheHaitian
Senior Associate
Joined: Jul 27, 2014 19:39:10 GMT -5
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Post by TheHaitian on Mar 21, 2019 18:43:47 GMT -5
It's been a few years since I've dated, and so details have grown fuzzy on some stuff, but here is one "online dating" failure... Dr. Demento... Not sure what the guy's profile read, or how long we talked before we met up, but likely within two weeks when schedules matched. According to his profile, he was working through college toward some kind of "professional degree", single, lots of travel (yea! love travel!), some big stuff that seemed to line up. Met for a drink at a local pub, weather was nice, so we were outside under a shade awning. Man, the guy was a talker. I'm pretty quiet and reserved, so it is kind of nice when someone can carry a conversation, ask questions without it feeling like an interrogation, etc. Except, I couldn't get a word in at all. Any time he would ask a question, I would start to answer and he'd cut me off with "oh, I've been there...." or "I've never been there, but I want...", etc. Work stuff came up. I'm in a nice, secure job, pays well, and one where you can be a "lifer" if you choose. He chose to spend his early 20s traveling the world, going all over the place, working little jobs to support that. Pretty cool, but not an opportunity I had had (but have though my son should do something like that for a few years while he is young, so I'm not opposed!) Then, he started college with the goal to become a doctor. Supposedly, he was at the point where he just needed to find a place to do a residency, but couldn't find anyplace? (We have a large hospital in our town that serves a large area. Also another good-sized hospital the next decent sized town over. And one in the town he lived in. And so many less than two hours away in the big city. But, I don't know everything there is to know about getting a residency, so ok...) Because he hasn't found a place to do a residency, he's living with his parents and working at a gas station. Part time (about 14 hours a week) because he doesn't want to earn enough to have to start paying on student loans yet. Also, he isn't sure how long he'll be in the area, because residency could be anywhere in the country. "Women here seem to want security, and I don't have that. So I just want someone who is cool with something that might just be short-term before I leave." Well... I'm a single mom to a kid who isn't going to be meeting some "short term" person. I also don't have much free time because I had him 100% of the time, even though there was technically an "every-other weekend" type custody agreement (ex-h left and never even called the kid, seeing him three times that I can remember after the divorce, and it's been many years since we've heard from him. Just some filler info...) Also, with my job, I'm not going to be wandering all over the place. It's not like a lot of jobs where you can just pick up and find a new, similar one. At some point, he asked me how I "got off" and stated "I mean, we all have needs!" How long would I hold out on sex, stuff like that. It got pretty bizarre suddenly. So, this guy is around 30 years old, claims to be a doctor, living with his parents, working at a gas station 14 hours a week, and looking for someone for casual hookups. Not at all what his profile relayed.When we left it, he was all "you're pretty cool" (I guess he got that from the two or three sentences I was allowed to finish?) and we should meet up again, just text me when and where. The next week, I'd get texts about "hey, when did you want to meet up?" while I was at work. Eventually I was able to just get it through that this wasn't going to work out the way he wanted. There was definitely no chemistry, or desire to see if maybe he was just anxious on the first date and overtalked. There was so much more that led to the nickname "Dr. Demento", but at this point, I can't remember it. At least he didn't try to physically pull me away from my car when I left like another date did! it's really a shame that that is not at all uncommon on dating sites. Every other guy is an "entrepreneur".... one of my friends joked that "entrepreneur" = not doing shit I take offense to that, I am an “entrepreneur” darn it! 😜 The new “it” thing on all social media platform!
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Cookies Galore
Senior Associate
I don't need no instructions to know how to rock
Joined: Dec 19, 2010 18:08:13 GMT -5
Posts: 10,729
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Post by Cookies Galore on Mar 22, 2019 10:08:59 GMT -5
Supposedly, he was at the point where he just needed to find a place to do a residency, but couldn't find anyplace? (We have a large hospital in our town that serves a large area. Also another good-sized hospital the next decent sized town over. And one in the town he lived in. And so many less than two hours away in the big city. But, I don't know everything there is to know about getting a residency, so ok...)
That's not unusual. There are many large teaching/trauma hospitals in Quebec, but my niece was only able to do her residency in Ontario. She's still there, and had to uproot the whole family so she could work at Toronto's Sick Kids Hospital. Those residency spots are very hard to come by. There was nothing else in the conversation that indicated he was being truthful and had actually gone to medical school. Maybe he was, but having almost gone into the medical field myself, and having mentioned that, it just didn't feel like he was being honest with that. Like, he could impress me that he was "a doctor", but once there was a hint that I could understand some of the jargon and classes, it was kind of dropped. You can be anything you want to be when you only plan on sticking around a month or two. So, who knows. There's a national match registry in order to do a residency in the US. You have to register, are selected for interviews all over, rank your top choices, hospitals rank their top choices, and then you just hope you get a residency match. If this guy actually went to med school then he did not match and didn't try to find an unmatched residency or didn't try to do something else, like research. So more likely he was just floating around in life and thought being an almost doctor would impress a woman!
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justme
Senior Associate
Joined: Feb 10, 2012 13:12:47 GMT -5
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Post by justme on Jul 2, 2019 13:25:24 GMT -5
I'm resurrecting even though it's old because, well, same theme. (Hopefully the mods don't smite me!)
So this last weekend I handed my phone to my friend while we were out and she got to swiping for me. Which is always kind of entertaining - one of the guys had a dick pic on his profile and everyone in our group including the dudes got a look at it as she was showing it around in disbelief. But I also said should could message some people. Well didn't realize quite how drunk she was (to be fair I wasn't sober either haha) and oh some of her messages were hilarious. I'm kind of sad I had to report to her that the dude she heyyyy boyyyyyy to, which she completely forgot about, did not reply.
Still nothing of note on the dating apps, but like a year ago on a whim I signed up to be in an online dating pool for a matchmaking website for $50. Year's almost up I think and I had given up, but got messages this week about a possible match. Seems like he might be a possibility, but still have to wait for sure. So that would be cool - ya figure a guy dropping the dough on a match making service is serious about a relationship, right?
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tallguy
Senior Associate
Joined: Apr 2, 2011 19:21:59 GMT -5
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Post by tallguy on Jul 2, 2019 23:05:07 GMT -5
I'm resurrecting even though it's old because, well, same theme. (Hopefully the mods don't smite me!) So this last weekend I handed my phone to my friend while we were out and she got to swiping for me. Which is always kind of entertaining - one of the guys had a dick pic on his profile and everyone in our group including the dudes got a look at it as she was showing it around in disbelief. But I also said should could message some people. Well didn't realize quite how drunk she was (to be fair I wasn't sober either haha) and oh some of her messages were hilarious. I'm kind of sad I had to report to her that the dude she heyyyy boyyyyyy to, which she completely forgot about, did not reply. Reminds me of something that happened to me once. I had an on again/off again FWB thing with someone for a few years. While we were off again, she went out to a club with some friends. When she went to the bar, the two friends went into her purse and took her phone. They started texting me, asking what was going on with me and X? Told me that they were rooting for me and that they didn't like the guy she was sort of "with." I had never met these two, but my girl had apparently told them an awful lot of things, including some that were VERY complimentary. They also told me that she would never admit it, but that she REALLY liked me. They tried to put her phone back in time, but apparently got caught. I laughed it off, but the girl texted me shortly after to apologize and tell me how furious she was at her friends. Phones get people into trouble all the time.
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justme
Senior Associate
Joined: Feb 10, 2012 13:12:47 GMT -5
Posts: 14,618
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Post by justme on Jul 2, 2019 23:43:52 GMT -5
I'm resurrecting even though it's old because, well, same theme. (Hopefully the mods don't smite me!) So this last weekend I handed my phone to my friend while we were out and she got to swiping for me. Which is always kind of entertaining - one of the guys had a dick pic on his profile and everyone in our group including the dudes got a look at it as she was showing it around in disbelief. But I also said should could message some people. Well didn't realize quite how drunk she was (to be fair I wasn't sober either haha) and oh some of her messages were hilarious. I'm kind of sad I had to report to her that the dude she heyyyy boyyyyyy to, which she completely forgot about, did not reply. Reminds me of something that happened to me once. I had an on again/off again FWB thing with someone for a few years. While we were off again, she went out to a club with some friends. When she went to the bar, the two friends went into her purse and took her phone. They started texting me, asking what was going on with me and X? Told me that they were rooting for me and that they didn't like the guy she was sort of "with." I had never met these two, but my girl had apparently told them an awful lot of things, including some that were VERY complimentary. They also told me that she would never admit it, but that she REALLY liked me. They tried to put her phone back in time, but apparently got caught. I laughed it off, but the girl texted me shortly after to apologize and tell me how furious she was at her friends. Phones get people into trouble all the time. Lol! My friends and I have only messaged on the others phone with permission. Almost always when either really drunk or when the guy was not a serious contender.
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justme
Senior Associate
Joined: Feb 10, 2012 13:12:47 GMT -5
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Post by justme on Feb 1, 2020 0:37:37 GMT -5
Resurrecting....
So found out tonight a guy that's been messaging me it wasn't his name or a nick named or anything. And he's all like oh safety concern?
Yea cuz guys are regularly stalked, harassed, sexually harassed, and sexually assaulted. Not that it doesn't happen, but it on a whole happens to women beyond significantly more than men.
The fact that he was just like oh yea this will be a negative against me just pretty much rubbed me the wrong way.
Fuck that.
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GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl
Senior Associate
"How you win matters." Ender, Ender's Game
Joined: Jan 2, 2011 13:33:09 GMT -5
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Post by GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl on Feb 1, 2020 11:42:46 GMT -5
Resurrecting.... So found out tonight a guy that's been messaging me it wasn't his name or a nick named or anything. And he's all like oh safety concern? Yea cuz guys are regularly stalked, harassed, sexually harassed, and sexually assaulted. Not that it doesn't happen, but it on a whole happens to women beyond significantly more than men. The fact that he was just like oh yea this will be a negative against me just pretty much rubbed me the wrong way. Fuck that. He's married.
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justme
Senior Associate
Joined: Feb 10, 2012 13:12:47 GMT -5
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Post by justme on Feb 1, 2020 17:57:46 GMT -5
Resurrecting.... So found out tonight a guy that's been messaging me it wasn't his name or a nick named or anything. And he's all like oh safety concern? Yea cuz guys are regularly stalked, harassed, sexually harassed, and sexually assaulted. Not that it doesn't happen, but it on a whole happens to women beyond significantly more than men. The fact that he was just like oh yea this will be a negative against me just pretty much rubbed me the wrong way. Fuck that. He's married. Ha! Yea that's probably it. I was talking to another guy last night and he's pissy that I would let him come over the last time we chatted. I haven't even met you yet asshole and I didn't give you my real number, but sure come over to my house. What could go wrong. Haven't decided if I want the entertainment of his response if I call him out on his stupidity or not.
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flutterby
Familiar Member
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Post by flutterby on Feb 2, 2020 8:16:32 GMT -5
I've had guys get annoyed with me when I insisted on our first meeting being in a public place. "Hey, I'm a nice guy! Let's go on a hike. In the mountains. In the middle of nowhere. With someone I've never met." How could I possibly think that's risky for me? If I wanted to end up as an episode on Forensic Files, then that first date sounds awesome! How do men really not understand this?!
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