azucena
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Post by azucena on Aug 5, 2020 11:48:30 GMT -5
buystoys - sorry to hear this news. numb seems like a reasonable place to be for a while.
Not sure what to do in my house anymore. My patience is completely gone, I can't concentrate on work, and every day I'm dealing with kid drama. I desperately need a break.
Today my 8 yo can't find anything to do. She's had a fit every day this week. She's clearly stressed about returning to school and being the 'only one to wear a mask' because they're allowed to take them off in the classroom. I'm insisting she leaves it on and the ped agreed. I keep telling her to blame it on me. Her best friend isn't returning her calls or will answer and then hang up in a couple of minutes. DD is worried that BFF is not going to play with her at school. I know BFF doesn't have many rules at home and will flit to whatever is most appealing. Her mom has texted me several times that BFF misses DD8. They aren't quarantining at all but 'understand' why we are.
Last night I let DD8 play outside with the neighbor kids. We've been keeping them apart but they were playing so well that they were gradually just together. It's beyond hard to know what's right. They tied a string to the steering wheel in the barbie car that DD proudly bought with her allowance. They were pulling it up and down the sidewalk and making the barbies fly out. I just know that the steering wheel is going to break off which will result in major tears and a tantrum. DD can wail for 2 to 3 hours about something like that - no exaggeration - particularly right now. She's clearly in a bad headspace. So I said we weren't playing that game today and of course she doesn't understand. Meanwhile, now she's crying anyway.
DH took DD12 to get lunch to get them out of the house and give me a break from her attitude. But now that means I'm trying to work and balance DD8's rotten mood. Some break.
Even when/if I get DD8 back on track - I have no concentration left for work. None. And I have plenty to do.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Aug 5, 2020 13:51:29 GMT -5
It's got to be absurdly stressful to mother your kids under these circumstances, azucena. You already had a demanding job and a husband with health issues. Having kids exposed to such high stress without good outlets makes it triply crazy. to you. I hope your DDs have a good day today and leave you some space to breathe.
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CCL
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Post by CCL on Aug 5, 2020 22:02:03 GMT -5
Well, the results are in. It's uterine cancer. I'm being referred to a specialist in Dallas. Everything is still up in the air until I have a hysterectomy. They'll be able to tell how invasive it is then. I'm numb right now.
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Aug 5, 2020 22:15:19 GMT -5
I'm so sorry, buystoys. We're in your corner. So, you come here & vent anytime. We're here to help.
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Aug 6, 2020 6:23:49 GMT -5
I'm so sorry you're facing this, buystoys. Thinking good wishes for you and your future. Yeah that. ((((Hugs)))) buystoys
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ners
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Post by ners on Aug 6, 2020 7:16:26 GMT -5
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Peace77
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Post by Peace77 on Aug 6, 2020 10:11:34 GMT -5
Buystoys,
My friend had the same diagnosis and surgery about 7 years ago and she's been fine ever since. She didn't have any additional treatment.
Do you keep your cell phone in your pants pocket? If you do, please stop.
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Rukh O'Rorke
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Post by Rukh O'Rorke on Aug 6, 2020 10:17:55 GMT -5
buystoyswishing you the best outcome, and quick recovery.
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buystoys
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Post by buystoys on Aug 6, 2020 11:00:28 GMT -5
Buystoys, My friend had the same diagnosis and surgery about 7 years ago and she's been fine ever since. She didn't have any additional treatment. Do you keep your cell phone in your pants pocket? If you do, please stop. Thanks for the good news. I'm hopeful it's not too serious, but just have to wait to see the specialist. I rarely carry my mobile anywhere. I do try to remember to put it in my purse when I'm going out without DH.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Aug 6, 2020 14:19:44 GMT -5
Thinking about you @busytoys
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Aug 6, 2020 20:33:31 GMT -5
Wishing you all the best, buystoys. Big hugs! Wish I could help.
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Aug 6, 2020 20:34:37 GMT -5
buystoys - sorry to hear this news. numb seems like a reasonable place to be for a while. Not sure what to do in my house anymore. My patience is completely gone, I can't concentrate on work, and every day I'm dealing with kid drama. I desperately need a break. Today my 8 yo can't find anything to do. She's had a fit every day this week. She's clearly stressed about returning to school and being the 'only one to wear a mask' because they're allowed to take them off in the classroom. I'm insisting she leaves it on and the ped agreed. I keep telling her to blame it on me. Her best friend isn't returning her calls or will answer and then hang up in a couple of minutes. DD is worried that BFF is not going to play with her at school. I know BFF doesn't have many rules at home and will flit to whatever is most appealing. Her mom has texted me several times that BFF misses DD8. They aren't quarantining at all but 'understand' why we are. Last night I let DD8 play outside with the neighbor kids. We've been keeping them apart but they were playing so well that they were gradually just together. It's beyond hard to know what's right. They tied a string to the steering wheel in the barbie car that DD proudly bought with her allowance. They were pulling it up and down the sidewalk and making the barbies fly out. I just know that the steering wheel is going to break off which will result in major tears and a tantrum. DD can wail for 2 to 3 hours about something like that - no exaggeration - particularly right now. She's clearly in a bad headspace. So I said we weren't playing that game today and of course she doesn't understand. Meanwhile, now she's crying anyway. DH took DD12 to get lunch to get them out of the house and give me a break from her attitude. But now that means I'm trying to work and balance DD8's rotten mood. Some break. Even when/if I get DD8 back on track - I have no concentration left for work. None. And I have plenty to do. This does not sound fun. Sorry.
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Lizard Queen
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Post by Lizard Queen on Aug 7, 2020 10:46:10 GMT -5
Sending healing thoughts, buystoys. Realizing my low-level constant depression is more than I realized. I think that's why I have no desire to do anything. I feel bad that I can't take my family's social distancing to a more disciplined level. And also not being so strict is saving all our sanity, as much as there is left of it. We're supposed to have a garage sale this weekend. These always make me feel like (a) a failure, and (b) I wasted a bunch of time and effort. Thinking that this may be our last one.
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toomuchreality
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Post by toomuchreality on Aug 9, 2020 21:32:49 GMT -5
Sending healing thoughts, buystoys. Realizing my low-level constant depression is more than I realized. I think that's why I have no desire to do anything. I feel bad that I can't take my family's social distancing to a more disciplined level. And also not being so strict is saving all our sanity, as much as there is left of it. We're supposed to have a garage sale this weekend. These always make me feel like (a) a failure, and (b) I wasted a bunch of time and effort. Thinking that this may be our last one. I hope your garage sale went well. Heck, when I give stuff away (good stuff!), I end up feeling like they thought I should have paid them, to take it! Ugh.
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Lizard Queen
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Post by Lizard Queen on Aug 10, 2020 18:52:37 GMT -5
Sending healing thoughts, buystoys. Realizing my low-level constant depression is more than I realized. I think that's why I have no desire to do anything. I feel bad that I can't take my family's social distancing to a more disciplined level. And also not being so strict is saving all our sanity, as much as there is left of it. We're supposed to have a garage sale this weekend. These always make me feel like (a) a failure, and (b) I wasted a bunch of time and effort. Thinking that this may be our last one. I hope your garage sale went well. Heck, when I give stuff away (good stuff!), I end up feeling like they thought I should have paid them, to take it! Ugh. Thanks, but we punted on the garage sale. There are certain bigger things I prefer to sell, but actually prefer to donate my kids' clothes. Garage salers like to buy things for next to nothing, and a lot of time, it's not worth the effort to set up. We do have a bunch of larger items, though, do we might have to try to get one together in a couple weeks.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Aug 11, 2020 7:46:25 GMT -5
I hope your garage sale went well. Heck, when I give stuff away (good stuff!), I end up feeling like they thought I should have paid them, to take it! Ugh. Thanks, but we punted on the garage sale. There are certain bigger things I prefer to sell, but actually prefer to donate my kids' clothes. Garage salers like to buy things for next to nothing, and a lot of time, it's not worth the effort to set up. We do have a bunch of larger items, though, do we might have to try to get one together in a couple weeks. Good to punt when your energy is best invested elsewhere. I agree about garage sales. When I last did them years ago now people were more and more insistent on driving prices to pennies. Not worth it. In this peculiar year there are certainly enough energy drains as it is without piling on more.
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buystoys
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Post by buystoys on Aug 14, 2020 8:07:17 GMT -5
It's been 1 1/2 weeks and nothing has been done yet. I called the gyn office on Tuesday to find out what the delay was. She told me she'd check with the new doctor and call me back. I left a voice mail for the new doctor later that day. Wednesday I got a call from the new doctor that they didn't have all the paperwork they needed. I called my PCP to have them generate a referral so they could complete all the paper work. It's now Friday and I still am up in the air. I hate dealing with insurance. I can't imagine how bad it would be for someone who doesn't know the ropes.
Hopefully I'll get an appointment set today. I'm just waiting for it to be 9 am to call them.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Aug 14, 2020 10:05:58 GMT -5
Take care of yourself.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Aug 15, 2020 11:23:13 GMT -5
Ugh, buystoys. I hope this all gets straightened out for you within the next few days. Thinking of you.
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Lizard Queen
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Post by Lizard Queen on Aug 15, 2020 12:32:38 GMT -5
Ugh, buystoys. I hope this all gets straightened out for you within the next few days. Thinking of you. Yeah, that. How frustrating!
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Aug 18, 2020 14:40:03 GMT -5
Had virtual appointment with med management doctor today.
She is leaving the practice. She said she planned to retire next year anyway, but she is changing careers and will be working part time. She said getting furloughed due to covid opened her eyes and that she enjoyed her time off.
So I get to have a new provider for my next appointment. She said she thought this particular provider would be better for me than the others they have.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Aug 18, 2020 20:24:49 GMT -5
Hope the new doctor works well for you, TheOtherMe. I dread when my shrink says he will retire.
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buystoys
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Post by buystoys on Aug 19, 2020 7:03:03 GMT -5
Good luck TheOtherMe. I know it can be unsettling to change providers.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Aug 19, 2020 7:56:11 GMT -5
My shrink is young. Since I have been seeing her, she had a baby. They were too busy for others to cover unless it was an emergency, so I went 3 long months without seeing her.
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buystoys
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Post by buystoys on Aug 19, 2020 9:52:53 GMT -5
My shrink is young. Since I have been seeing her, she had a baby. They were too busy for others to cover unless it was an emergency, so I went 3 long months without seeing her. Ouch!
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Aug 19, 2020 11:53:02 GMT -5
Definitely ouch.
This area is very short handed for mental health.
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buystoys
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Post by buystoys on Aug 21, 2020 7:53:29 GMT -5
This article about depression and the pandemic hit home for me. Hopefully it will be helpful to someone else.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Aug 21, 2020 8:46:10 GMT -5
Thank you for this.
I wonder if our lives will ever be back to normal since the US has failed at slowing the spread.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Aug 22, 2020 7:37:57 GMT -5
This article about depression and the pandemic hit home for me. Hopefully it will be helpful to someone else. Really good piece, thank you for posting it. This 'new normal' sometimes sucks donkey balls.
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buystoys
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Post by buystoys on Aug 22, 2020 8:04:22 GMT -5
The fact that it keeps changing drives me nuts. Literally. I have no control and that's a big issue for me. The new normal from five months ago is dust and we have another new normal to adapt to. I really wish life would just slow down for a bit and let me breathe.
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